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Re: Rosemary the Great

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Sure is--the flower of our list--I just love her and the kids, too!

Love to all of you, ! n Rojas

Rosemary the Great

Rosemary,

You are amazing - whether your children realize it or not!

Love,

On Friday, January 9, 2004, at 07:12 PM, ROSEMARY3FOR3wCF@...

wrote:

> e

> You are NOT NOT NOT alone...OMG - I have those days more often than

> not. My

> sister, who I never listen to once said " STOP comparing your life to

> theirs

> [kids with cf]. They don't know any better. You are thinking of you

> childhood. " For the most part she is right. I too am the MOTHER FROM

> HELL.........breathe dammit. I have even told them how LUCKY they

> are, how years ago kids died

> from CF because they didn't have all the treatments (vest, breathing,

> medicine, etc.) that we have today. I acknowledge it sucks but that

> we MUST do it -

> end of story. One thing I am finding is that as they age it gets

> easier with

> TIME. Now that they stay up LATE they actually get free time between

> dinner

> and bedtime - ok so its only an hour but when they went to bed at 9 it

> was

> awful........I would be doing dishes and setting up their meds.

>

> CF is isolating. Drs. keep us separate. We are scared talking to

> others for

> fear their child is better/worse so I think it holds us back. I was

> married

> to a great guy - he just can't cope. 9/11 pushed him over the edge -

> he was

> there. Now he drinks...I am happy when he passes out - it making

> pushing the

> vest over the basturds toes easier.......

>

> Last year was the first time I realized families go out at night. Be

> flexible. Do treatments before dinner and go out after. I was/am a

> rigid person.

> With CF you MUST learn flexibility. You must learn patience.

>

> The patience to sit in a drs office, lab, etc. for hours.........

> the patience to spend hours on hold with insurance, drs. etc.

> the patience when the CF Center loses your lab results, ct, etc.

> the patience when people say " she looks so healthy "

> the patience when people whine about stupid things......

> the patience to pick up prescriptions that aren't ready

> the patience to spell your LAST NAME for the 100th time

> the patience to be PLEASANT and enterain your child while experiencing

> all

> these frustrations since children take their cues from us. If we

> snap/yell/cry

> they too will......

>

> I have hole on the inside of my mouth from biting the sides of my

> mouth in

> order to keep my mouth SHUT!!!!!!!

>

> You are not alone.......my major fear is that my children with die

> thinking I

> was the horrible person and not realizing that all the nagging,

> whining,

> yelling was to help them. I remember hating my mother when I was a

> teen thinking

> she was trying to ruin my life. It wasn't until I was in my 20's -

> late teens

> that I realized how wonderful she was. It wasn't til I had kids that

> I truly

> appreciated all she did and sacrificed for me. It wasn't til she

> died that

> I realized I experienced the worst pain in my hole life - until my

> children's

> diagnosis. Her death was horrific and I was SO sad......but I can

> truly

> eqate it with receiving the children's diagnosis.

>

> The ones the can COPE are the ones that can talk about it. My husband

> doesn't talk about it and cannot cope...........

>

> Please, feel free to vent or contact me privately.......we are all

> here for

> each other.

>

> Love, Rosemary

>

>

>

>

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