Re: Returning to work?

[Guest guest]

Jen,

I had my first attack of acute panc in Jan 2000. I was never actually on an

extended leave of absence, but I was off work a tremendous amount during 2000.

I think I was in the hospital about 4 or 5 times. I applied for a disability

retirement in Dec 2000, but then my health did a turn around in March 2001 just

as I received the approval for the disability retirement. I turned down the

retirement and for the most part didn't miss any work due to panc problems until

July 2002 when the attacks returned while I was on a business trip. For me,

going back to work was the right thing to do at the time. However, I don't

think I was as well as I thought I was. I did a tremendous amount of travel the

last year that I worked. I was pretty much gone 50% of the time. I even ended

up stranded in Japan on Sep 11, 2001. I think the stress of the travel and my

job may have sped things up, but I'll never know that for sure. What I do know

is that I gave it my very best shot to continue working. I loved my job and I

gave over 100%. When I applied for disability retirement for the second time

in Dec 2002 I knew that I had truly given my all as far as attempting to

continue working. I could truly look myself in the mirror and anyone else in

the eye and honestly say, " I am no longer physically able to hold down any full

time job. " For me, that gave me a sense of peace. I could have given it up in

March 2001 and it really wouldn't have been wrong, but I think I would have

always wondered if it was the right thing to do. When my second request for

disability retirement was approved and I retired in March 2003, I had no doubts

about whether it was the right thing to do.

I'm not trying to make you think that your story will be mine. You may go back

to work and do just fine for many years to come. In addition to cp (which

wasn't actually diagnosed as cp until June 2003), I have systemic lupus,

autoimmune liver disease, type II diabetes, antiphospholipid syndrome (an

autoimmune clotting disorder which, despite being on blood thinners, has caused

a few mini strokes already), and a genetic IgG deficiency, which makes me much

more susceptible to infections. For me, it wasn't just the cp, it was the

combination of all the health issues together that finally made me realizing

that my trying to continue working full time was no longer in my best interest

nor was it in the best interest of my employer.

Having said all that, do what you feel in your heart is right for you. Give it

your all so that if the time comes that working full time is no longer what is

best for you, you will know you gave it your best shot.

Hang in there,

W

alabama