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Losing weight was no problem because the pain caused the perfect

aversion therepy. More than 5 grams of fat in a sitting or more

than 15 grams of fat for the day caused horrible pain and a risk of

an accute attack.

After the whipple is a constant state of bulimia. Eat more than 1/2

a cup in volume of anything, it comes right back up.

So, no credit goes to my strong diet will power cause I would love

to feel that stuffed and sated feeling again. Just isn't going to

happen.

It sounds trite to say try and avoid depression. We all sure get

hit with it. I have found the " Fake it till ya make it " mental

state really helps. I just know depression is fattening for most

folks. Try not to get mad at your situation. It sucks for sure,

but it is here, and for most of us, it is not going away. It sure

was easier to do this on 6 ES vicodins a day!!! My best friend is

so darn sick with cancer right now that I feel like the lucky one.

" I was upset about having no shoes, until I met the man who had no

feet. "

Carol

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  • 1 year later...

- my dear - I'm glad to know that your Bishop and friends

will be with you this evening. You definately will benefit from

their presence. Please do not lose sight of the wonderful job you

are doing. You are taking such good care of Dasia. It's okay to

cry. It is incredibly frustrating dealing with these weight issues

for our children. It can be incredibly exhausting. The reason you

are so tired is because you are such a caring mother and only want

the best for your child. I'm probably quoting someone who recently

told me that - but, it makes a lot of sense and I understand more

now that we grieve and become sad because we want only the best for

our children and sometimes it just does not seem possible. Dasia,

sometimes when life just seems to be too difficult to manage - we

need a little support from our friends. You have us here. I'm glad

you feel comfortable enough to reach out and discuss your feelings.

The benefit for you to do that too is that it will help you to sort

out some of your concerns and fears. When I'm feeling down, the

first thing I do is contact a friend. Sometimes, it's just enough

to get me going into that place of comfort where I can start to see

things in a better light. When it isn't enough - I remind myself

that I have to take care of ME first - before EVERYONE else before

I'm going to get better. I don't mean forever. I mean a couple

hours one day, a couple hours another - and so on. Sometimes, when

I'm lucky - I might even get a whole day or a weekend. But,

usually, I have to start out small with everything going on in our

lives. You really need to find time to do something positive and

uplifting for yourself. Dasia will be fine for those few hours.

Maybe it's when she is taking a nap. Maybe it's before she wakes

up - you can set your alarm a little earlier that morning. Make

yourself get out of bed. Have a nice warm cup of your favorite tea

or coffee. Take a bath. Read a few pages of a " positive " novel.

Paint a christmas ornament. Write a letter to a good friend and

share something positive with her. Anything positive will do. Do

this repetatively for a few days and see how you feel. Sometimes,

just forcing ourselves to be more " upbeat " helps us get out of that

sadness that encumbers our whole being and then we are able to use

that positive mental energy to fight the difficult feelings that we

were unable to face initially.

I have also found that taking my prenatal vitamins continually has

really helped a lot. When I forget to take one - I notice I am more

exhausted. If you have access to a good vitamin - this may help

your spirits as well and help ease your tiredness.

Continue what you are doing, meeting with friends and church family

members, do something positive for yourself for a few days and let

us know how you are doing - please.

I hope you are okay with my comments. I so know what it's like to

be sad, frustrated, and tired. It's not very much fun.

As far as Dasia is concerned. I would continue to discuss with the

nutritionists what their thoughts are and what they plan to do to

help her through the situation. I know for my son Ian, sometimes

there is not much I can do - but, wade through the tough times until

I can finally get him to eat and gain weight. Continue to read the

posts - there is a wealth of information here. You will do just

fine. You are a wonderful person and fantastic mom. Don't doubt

that for a minute.

Hugs to you.

I'll be traveling for the next three days so I will not be able to

check on you until Monday. My best to you and I will be thinking of

you lot's. Promise.

- H

>

> Hi Everyone,

> I haven't been on the computer much lately. I've been so

depressed, and it's so exhausting to feel this way, I just wish I

could sleep it all away. Dasia is constantly sick ever since it got

cold about 2 months ago. Then, the last 2 out of 3 nutr. visits she

lost 5 ounces each time, she's weighed every 2 weeks. It doesn't

seem like that much, why am I falling apart over it? Today was one

of those visits, and I haven't been able to stop crying. Some of my

friends from church and our Bishop will be here tonight to help give

support. My husband is out of town, and through all this, I'm just

barely hanging on by a thread. Her nutr. said they probably wouldn't

recommend a feeding tube since she has only lost weight in the

winter months when she gets sick a lot. The rest of the time, I had

been dealing with plateaus in her weight though, then I thought

things were turning around since during this summer she gained about

a pound. It's such a confusing battle, and I know everyone's

> situation is unique, and it's really up to me to ask for a tube

or not. I'm just lacking strength right now, thanks for being here,

and for listening. I'm usually good at putting on a smiling face

through whatever hard times hit, I just feel like I can't deal with

this, especially without my husband, why now?

>

> Mom to Dasia

>

>

> __________________________________________________

>

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H - Thanks for your kind reply. I'm starting to feel better, it's almost time to

call my husband, that always helps too. He's 2 hours behind our time, and 8:30

is SO long to wait on some days. I think sometimes I mask my feelings and don't

grieve when I should, and it all builds up, causing a meltdown. I think it may

be my minds twisted way of surviving by going into denial. I just can't handle

the thought of having a child who isn't thriving. But once again we'll somehow

get through this MAD season!

advocate22003 wrote: - my dear - I'm glad to

know that your Bishop and friends

will be with you this evening. You definately will benefit from

their presence. Please do not lose sight of the wonderful job you

are doing. You are taking such good care of Dasia. It's okay to

cry. It is incredibly frustrating dealing with these weight issues

for our children. It can be incredibly exhausting. The reason you

are so tired is because you are such a caring mother and only want

the best for your child. I'm probably quoting someone who recently

told me that - but, it makes a lot of sense and I understand more

now that we grieve and become sad because we want only the best for

our children and sometimes it just does not seem possible. Dasia,

sometimes when life just seems to be too difficult to manage - we

need a little support from our friends. You have us here. I'm glad

you feel comfortable enough to reach out and discuss your feelings.

The benefit for you to do that too is that it will help you to sort

out some of your concerns and fears. When I'm feeling down, the

first thing I do is contact a friend. Sometimes, it's just enough

to get me going into that place of comfort where I can start to see

things in a better light. When it isn't enough - I remind myself

that I have to take care of ME first - before EVERYONE else before

I'm going to get better. I don't mean forever. I mean a couple

hours one day, a couple hours another - and so on. Sometimes, when

I'm lucky - I might even get a whole day or a weekend. But,

usually, I have to start out small with everything going on in our

lives. You really need to find time to do something positive and

uplifting for yourself. Dasia will be fine for those few hours.

Maybe it's when she is taking a nap. Maybe it's before she wakes

up - you can set your alarm a little earlier that morning. Make

yourself get out of bed. Have a nice warm cup of your favorite tea

or coffee. Take a bath. Read a few pages of a " positive " novel.

Paint a christmas ornament. Write a letter to a good friend and

share something positive with her. Anything positive will do. Do

this repetatively for a few days and see how you feel. Sometimes,

just forcing ourselves to be more " upbeat " helps us get out of that

sadness that encumbers our whole being and then we are able to use

that positive mental energy to fight the difficult feelings that we

were unable to face initially.

I have also found that taking my prenatal vitamins continually has

really helped a lot. When I forget to take one - I notice I am more

exhausted. If you have access to a good vitamin - this may help

your spirits as well and help ease your tiredness.

Continue what you are doing, meeting with friends and church family

members, do something positive for yourself for a few days and let

us know how you are doing - please.

I hope you are okay with my comments. I so know what it's like to

be sad, frustrated, and tired. It's not very much fun.

As far as Dasia is concerned. I would continue to discuss with the

nutritionists what their thoughts are and what they plan to do to

help her through the situation. I know for my son Ian, sometimes

there is not much I can do - but, wade through the tough times until

I can finally get him to eat and gain weight. Continue to read the

posts - there is a wealth of information here. You will do just

fine. You are a wonderful person and fantastic mom. Don't doubt

that for a minute.

Hugs to you.

I'll be traveling for the next three days so I will not be able to

check on you until Monday. My best to you and I will be thinking of

you lot's. Promise.

- H

>

> Hi Everyone,

> I haven't been on the computer much lately. I've been so

depressed, and it's so exhausting to feel this way, I just wish I

could sleep it all away. Dasia is constantly sick ever since it got

cold about 2 months ago. Then, the last 2 out of 3 nutr. visits she

lost 5 ounces each time, she's weighed every 2 weeks. It doesn't

seem like that much, why am I falling apart over it? Today was one

of those visits, and I haven't been able to stop crying. Some of my

friends from church and our Bishop will be here tonight to help give

support. My husband is out of town, and through all this, I'm just

barely hanging on by a thread. Her nutr. said they probably wouldn't

recommend a feeding tube since she has only lost weight in the

winter months when she gets sick a lot. The rest of the time, I had

been dealing with plateaus in her weight though, then I thought

things were turning around since during this summer she gained about

a pound. It's such a confusing battle, and I know everyone's

> situation is unique, and it's really up to me to ask for a tube

or not. I'm just lacking strength right now, thanks for being here,

and for listening. I'm usually good at putting on a smiling face

through whatever hard times hit, I just feel like I can't deal with

this, especially without my husband, why now?

>

> Mom to Dasia

>

>

> __________________________________________________

>

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I know EXACTLY where you are coming from. gets weighed

frequently, too, and just this past week he had also lost. And, this

isn't the first time. I have been where you are. I cry and get upset

and wonder what I am doing wrong? But, it isn't what you are or

aren't doing. So, don't blame yourself. If Dasia is anything like

, there will be good weigh-ins and bad ones. I know you are

worried though. Just know that you are doing a great job. I can

imagine how hard it is when your husband is away, too. Hopefully you

had a great phone conversation and he comforted you and you feel

better now. The winter months are so hard because our kids are sick

so much. But, remember how well she did over the summer. As long as

she is not hypoglycemic and spilling ketones, she will be fine. I

know it is hard enough to get them to eat when they AREN'T sick, let

alone trying to get something in when they are. So many of us battle

this, and (H) is struggling with this for her little boy,

Ian, right now too. So, know that you aren't alone in all of this.

Did I see where you were thinking of seeing Dr. H? She would be a

great one to help you out in this situation.

I hope you have a better day today!

Jodi R.

>

> Hi Everyone,

> I haven't been on the computer much lately. I've been so

depressed, and it's so exhausting to feel this way, I just wish I

could sleep it all away. Dasia is constantly sick ever since it got

cold about 2 months ago. Then, the last 2 out of 3 nutr. visits she

lost 5 ounces each time, she's weighed every 2 weeks. It doesn't seem

like that much, why am I falling apart over it? Today was one of

those visits, and I haven't been able to stop crying. Some of my

friends from church and our Bishop will be here tonight to help give

support. My husband is out of town, and through all this, I'm just

barely hanging on by a thread. Her nutr. said they probably wouldn't

recommend a feeding tube since she has only lost weight in the winter

months when she gets sick a lot. The rest of the time, I had been

dealing with plateaus in her weight though, then I thought things

were turning around since during this summer she gained about a

pound. It's such a confusing battle, and I know everyone's

> situation is unique, and it's really up to me to ask for a tube or

not. I'm just lacking strength right now, thanks for being here, and

for listening. I'm usually good at putting on a smiling face through

whatever hard times hit, I just feel like I can't deal with this,

especially without my husband, why now?

>

> Mom to Dasia

>

>

> __________________________________________________

>

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