Guest guest Posted August 23, 2005 Report Share Posted August 23, 2005 Hi all, I'm new to this site,it seems a good place of support.I'm just in need of advice. I'm 26 years old in a weeks time and have finally had enough of my jaw abnormalty. Basically when i was around 12 i went to see an orthodontist who looked at my bite and told my parents that as i'm not in any pain there woud be no need to go through with such dreadful surgery.Right now i am really angry that they did not care about my appearence. I have a fairly slight underbite with asymmetry.I've never like how i looked but put up with it,until 2 years ago,i had 3 teeth removed one was on the upper jaw and my bite has collapsed on that side moving my top teeth halfway behind my lower jaw.I hate how ugly i look.I will not leave the house. The problem is,i think yes,if i feel that way then go for surgery.But i have suffered from severe depression,anxiety and eating disorders since i was 19 which has resulted in me having no life and missing all my youth.Now if i go ahead with this surgery then i will be putting my life on even greater hold.I mean how old will i be before i can actually go out? 30? i have no friends,no life.and i want to start getting those things back now,i've been patient enough. Basically i'm asking if you were in my position would you go ahead with the surgery? I haven't seen anyone about it yet,as my dentist just does routine fillings and does not mention my jaw. I'm just so depressed and anxious,i don't know what to do for the best. any reply will be greatly appreciated.thanks so much =). Jane Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 2005 Report Share Posted August 23, 2005 I'd add that this whole process isn't easy -- down the road, you could be a lot happier based on the changes in your appearance, but there's a lot of frustration to get there, at least in my experience. The problems with insurance, endless dr. appts, changes in appearance (I looked better before they started moving my teeth all around), pain from braces, setbacks (taking longer than they tell you), etc. have been rough. It's been a lot of tears and ranting to parents, friends, and my boyfriend. Just expect a lot of grief going in -- you may have a lot to deal with before things get better for you physically. Make sure you're strong enough to handle it. >From: fiddlesticks220002 <no_reply > >Reply-To: orthognathicsurgerysupport >To: orthognathicsurgerysupport >Subject: [Orthognathic Surgery Support ] Re: Advice >Date: Tue, 23 Aug 2005 13:47:09 -0000 > >Hi Jane, > >As Jo said in her e-mail, you need to get out and get on with life. >I was also ostracized (sp?) as a child but learned to get over it >early on in life. I was quite prepared to live with my looks for the >rest of my life, but not the TMJ problems I was starting to have in >my late 40s (I'll be 50 next month, celebrating my 3rd anniversary >post-op next week). If you're interested in seeing the physical >change, you can see my photos on site 2 at >http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/orthognathicsurgerysite2 in the >photos section Fiddlesticks folder (you'll have to join that >group to see photos and post messages). The functional changes are >what mattered to me, though, and I am quite happy with that. I was a >life-long mouth breather, and now I can close my mouth properly and >breathe through my nose, as well as chew properly and open without >pain. > >The problem is not HOW you look, it's how you FEEL about how you >look. Surgery is not a magic pill for that. Yes, you probably do >have functional problems that can be resolved with surgery (and that >may result in external change), but do not expect it to solve the >depression and other emotional problems that you have. You may need >to seek out therapy for that. > >There are many, many people out there who value WHO a person is >rather than what they look like. But they will not come knocking on >your door. You need to get out, get involved in something that you >really like, and the friends will come from that. > >I was fortunate enough to have talent in music, and had music >lessons and played in a number of ensembles and orchestras growing >up. I met many friends who valued me for that, and for who I was, >not how I looked. I didn't have a lot of friends at home or school, >but that didn't matter to me. The friends I did have were the real >deal. > >Nobody can make you feel bad about your looks but you. I imagine >that, if the whole world were blind, nobody would think twice about >how we looked. It would only matter how we treated each other. So be >gentle to yourself. > >I hope that helps. > > > > > Hi all, > > I'm new to this site,it seems a good place of support.I'm just in > > need of advice. > > I'm 26 years old in a weeks time and have finally had enough of my > > jaw abnormalty. > > Basically when i was around 12 i went to see an orthodontist who > > looked at my bite and told my parents that as i'm not in any pain > > there woud be no need to go through with such dreadful >surgery.Right > > now i am really angry that they did not care about my appearence. > > I have a fairly slight underbite with asymmetry.I've never like >how i > > looked but put up with it,until 2 years ago,i had 3 teeth removed >one > > was on the upper jaw and my bite has collapsed on that side moving >my > > top teeth halfway behind my lower jaw.I hate how ugly i look.I >will > > not leave the house. > > The problem is,i think yes,if i feel that way then go for >surgery.But > > i have suffered from severe depression,anxiety and eating >disorders > > since i was 19 which has resulted in me having no life and missing > > all my youth.Now if i go ahead with this surgery then i will be > > putting my life on even greater hold.I mean how old will i be >before > > i can actually go out? 30? i have no friends,no life.and i want to > > start getting those things back now,i've been patient enough. > > Basically i'm asking if you were in my position would you go ahead > > with the surgery? I haven't seen anyone about it yet,as my dentist > > just does routine fillings and does not mention my jaw. > > I'm just so depressed and anxious,i don't know what to do for the > > best. any reply will be greatly > > appreciated.thanks so much =). > > Jane > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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