Re: Re: doc band without support from spouse unrealistic?

[Guest guest]

It's still around $1000.  We do allright, but we don't have a lot of extra income, and convincing someone who is already VERY opposed to the helmet that we should pull a grand from our savings (especially at this time of year) to pay for it makes the whole thing all the more challenging.

I have also noticed that it's mostly mothers trying to convince fathers.  I wish my wife was even SLIGHTLY concerned about his head.  It makes me think that perhaps I'm just way too focused on it.  I know it sounds cliche, but more often than not, mom knows best.  I've really been trying to see things her way and just move on.  It would be such a relief to not care and focus on other things.

On Thu, Dec 16, 2010 at 9:50 PM, <danaiconnie@...> wrote:

That's a good point, caden_mom, because we had to pay $3500 of the $3800 for our doc band. So the fact that he is risking paying 20% of the cost might be a good sign that he should at least try.

[Guest guest]

That would make your band $5,000. My band full price was $1800 (hanger). With insurance it would have cost $2500. I got a discount for paying without ins. I would call them back up. That price is not... normal. You sure you didn't mishear or they were trying to dissuade you due to his age?Dads are just as important as moms. I think it shows doubly how bad it is as a dad would normally ignore it if it wasn't THAT bad. Just shows how bad it really is. What are his measurements? You realize it will still be a few weeks until it's made. You really need to get in there asap. From: Kapell <jasonkapell@...>Plagiocephaly Sent: Thu, December 16, 2010 7:21:30 PMSubject: Re: Re: doc band without support from spouse unrealistic?

It's still around $1000. We do allright, but we don't have a lot of extra income, and convincing someone who is already VERY opposed to the helmet that we should pull a grand from our savings (especially at this time of year) to pay for it makes the whole thing all the more challenging.

I have also noticed that it's mostly mothers trying to convince fathers. I wish my wife was even SLIGHTLY concerned about his head. It makes me think that perhaps I'm just way too focused on it. I know it sounds cliche, but more often than not, mom knows best. I've really been trying to see things her way and just move on. It would be such a relief to not care and focus on other things.

On Thu, Dec 16, 2010 at 9:50 PM, <danaiconnie@...> wrote:

That's a good point, caden_mom, because we had to pay $3500 of the $3800 for our doc band. So the fact that he is risking paying 20% of the cost might be a good sign that he should at least try.

[Guest guest]

You've not posted photos or measurements, which each of us would have

to weigh against our experiences to calculate an complete opinion of

worthwhile-ness. I suppose your pediatrician, like mine, fudged the

numbers with a measuring tape in order to justify the prescription to

insurance? So, photos would mean more to me.

Our experience: we had a slightly positive outcome overall, with a

STARband provider and a similar-age baby (see our pictures; I

estimate 3 mm correction), but it was at least successful in

improving an eye tracking problem, therefore worthwhile. We sold it

to Clara as a " pretty hat. " She enjoyed the attention, the having

something that her twin didn't, and the routine daily shampoo. Once

her skin acclimated, having the helmet off felt itchy, so there is a

bit of self-reinforcement, there, too. She may have even felt it

easier to focus her vision and attention immediately, with the

helmet's structural support. The treatment was more stressful to me

than anyone, necessitating confrontation with the orthotist and

manufacturer to re-make the helmet.

I had (and still have) more ire for the pediatrician, and indeed, may

already have been suffering from a Don Quixote complex before this

whole plagiocephaly quest. If you have a hard time finding the good

in other people, this probably ain't gonna help. You may well

discover that there is NO ONE with whom you can completely entrust

your child's welfare. " Ignorance is bliss, " but ignorant people sure

do make enlightenment a drag!

Again, I can't say whether your son's problem can be ignored. Based

on previous posts, I speculate that you're looking at brachycephaly

with no functional concerns. (Reasoning that, if your son were

developmentally delayed, saucer-eyed and mushroom-crowned, more

people would be on board with the treatment.) While I believe it is

generally harder to correct brachycephaly than asymmetrical

plagiocephaly, the expertise demanded of the orthotist is less. Less

heat rash, less pushing on the one eyebrow, less rotation against the

one ear -- which means less discomfort for the kid, less pushing and

prodding the orthotist, and most importantly, less for your family to

complain about.

So, my opinion: the esthetic return on your investment will probably

be low, but the treatment itself should be fairly stress-free, once

you resolve the disagreement with your family.

In that argument, I'll personally vouch that a STARband comes in

handy when you're locked out of your car at Kmart and your kid

decides to dive backward out of the cart onto a cement floor while

you're distracted. You said your insurance didn't actually cover the

DOC band, right?

Thad Launderville

town, VT

Clara age 2 1/2, STARband '10

On Dec 16, 2010, at 10:21 PM, Kapell wrote:

> It would be such a relief to not care and focus on other things.

[Guest guest]

Yes, it would be a relief to you to not have things like this to care about. Trust me, my baby's head shape was the least of our worries among other health concerns. But your baby is lucky you care about things like this because, time and time again, early intervention has been shown to make the difference between kids who see cures or improvements through treatments and those who never do, resulting in lifelong problems or more difficult and prolonged treatment later in life. I provide treatment and do clinical research for infants and toddlers with autism and and shake my head to myself all the time when I see regretful parents who didn't follow their intuition and just listened to what ill informed teachers or pediatricians said. Your wife may be right and this isn't anything to worry about if it is really mild. But it's never ever a bad thing to be concerned and leave no rock left unturned before making a decision. It's usually better to be proactive than reactive.

[Guest guest]

Thad, danaiconnie, I'm not a huge fan of posting pictures of my kids online.  I can tell you that my boy has plagio on his right sideresulting from torticollis that was successfully treated with PT.  He has no facial asymmetry, and his

right ear is a bit anterior to the left.  His forehead is perfectly square.  His profiles are nearly identical.Cranial Tech measure his cranial vault as being 10mm " off " .  The funny thing is that they reported facial asymmetry and bossing in the forehead which I felt was a TOTAL stretch.  I mean, nobody has

scrutinized this poor kid more than me, and I can tell you that his forehead is perfectly square, and his face has no more asymmetry than anyone else without plagiocephaly.  To be sure, if you look at his headfrom a bird's eye view, you can see that there is flattening, and from a 3/4 view, his head is a bit " taller " on his right. 

But as for facial asymmetry and " bossing " ...it just isn't there, and it did give me pause as to whether Cranial Tech was trying to " pad " the evaluation.  No fudging from the pedi.  I went to Cranial Tech without consulting him.  CT sent the photostudy and measurements

to him, and he wrote the RX based on that.  The pedi feels it's unnecessary, as do 2 other pedi's in the practice (I've gotten 2nd and 3rd opinions).  I mean, my son DOES qualify, but that doesn't mean he needs it.  Dr. A (my third opinion)

 who has 2 young children of her own, said that she wouldn't if he was her boy.  This was 3 days ago.  I appreciate the advice and humor.  Any more feedback you guys have to offer would be great.My feeling is that he's not going to get a helmet, mostly because I fear it would put a lot of pressure on my marriage.  Also, if the helmet

has minimal effect, it may be the cause of self-esteem issues rather than the solution.  What I mean is that there's a very realpossibility that my son, his sister, cousins, extended family and friends never would have noticed except for the fact

 that he was obviously in a helmet device for a period of time as a little kid which must mean something was " wrong " with him.  Why point it out to him and the world?  It's like a neon sign.  " In case you didn't notice, my son's head is bit flat

on the right side! "   Certainly, his 7 year old sister and older cousins will not likely forget it.  Kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy.  It's a lot to process.Of course, if it totally rounded out his head, there would be no problem.  But that's a big " if " .  Can you tell I'm being torn apart by this?

On Fri, Dec 17, 2010 at 12:06 AM, Thad Launderville <p38thadl@...> wrote:

You've not posted photos or measurements, which each of us would have

to weigh against our experiences to calculate an complete opinion of

worthwhile-ness.  I suppose your pediatrician, like mine, fudged the

numbers with a measuring tape in order to justify the prescription to

insurance?  So, photos would mean more to me.

Our experience:  we had a slightly positive outcome overall, with a

STARband provider and a similar-age baby (see our pictures; I

estimate 3 mm correction), but it was at least successful in

improving an eye tracking problem, therefore worthwhile.  We sold it

to Clara as a " pretty hat. "  She enjoyed the attention, the having

something that her twin didn't, and the routine daily shampoo.  Once

her skin acclimated, having the helmet off felt itchy, so there is a

bit of self-reinforcement, there, too.  She may have even felt it

easier to focus her vision and attention immediately, with the

helmet's structural support.  The treatment was more stressful to me

than anyone, necessitating confrontation with the orthotist and

manufacturer to re-make the helmet.

I had (and still have) more ire for the pediatrician, and indeed, may

already have been suffering from a Don Quixote complex before this

whole plagiocephaly quest.  If you have a hard time finding the good

in other people, this probably ain't gonna help.  You may well

discover that there is NO ONE with whom you can completely entrust

your child's welfare.   " Ignorance is bliss, " but ignorant people sure

do make enlightenment a drag!

Again, I can't say whether your son's problem can be ignored.  Based

on previous posts, I speculate that you're looking at brachycephaly

with no functional concerns.  (Reasoning that, if your son were

developmentally delayed, saucer-eyed and mushroom-crowned, more

people would be on board with the treatment.)  While I believe it is

generally harder to correct brachycephaly than asymmetrical

plagiocephaly, the expertise demanded of the orthotist is less.  Less

heat rash, less pushing on the one eyebrow, less rotation against the

one ear -- which means less discomfort for the kid, less pushing and

prodding the orthotist, and most importantly, less for your family to

complain about.

So, my opinion:  the esthetic return on your investment will probably

be low, but the treatment itself should be fairly stress-free, once

you resolve the disagreement with your family.

In that argument, I'll personally vouch that a STARband comes in

handy when you're locked out of your car at Kmart and your kid

decides to dive backward out of the cart onto a cement floor while

you're distracted.  You said your insurance didn't actually cover the

DOC band, right?

Thad Launderville

town, VT

Clara age 2 1/2, STARband '10

On Dec 16, 2010, at 10:21 PM, Kapell wrote:

> It would be such a relief to not care and focus on other things.

------------------------------------

For more plagio info

[Guest guest]

Hi ,Go with your gut. You know what is right for your son whether your wife agrees. Parents can be wrong sometimes. My husband was slightly skeptical when Cranial Tech recommended a helmet(only because they sell them) but once a neurosurgeon recommended it, he was on board. We banded our daughter at 8 months and paid $2900 upfront not knowing whether insurance would cover the band. It actually did and we ended up paying a $1,030. It is the best money we've ever spent and would have been even at $2900. Our daughter received amazing results and we have never once regretted our decision, which was easy for us because our daughter's head was noticeably deformed. Baby wearing the helmet is a temporary inconvenience with the likelihood of a huge payout in the end. There have been some

other parents who have posted on the board who have not met eye to eye over banding. If you believe that banding is right for your son, then stand your ground and get him the help you think that he needs. Lots of parents have to fight for what is right for their child. In my case, I had to stand my ground with my daughter's ped before she referred us to a specialist(she was not well informed regarding banding and I hope that she is now.) Your case is a little more complicated than that. Best of luck,Amy From: Kapell <jasonkapell@...>Plagiocephaly Sent: Thu, December 16, 2010 10:21:30 PMSubject: Re: Re: doc band without support from spouse unrealistic?

It's still around $1000. We do allright, but we don't have a lot of extra income, and convincing someone who is already VERY opposed to the helmet that we should pull a grand from our savings (especially at this time of year) to pay for it makes the whole thing all the more challenging.

I have also noticed that it's mostly mothers trying to convince fathers. I wish my wife was even SLIGHTLY concerned about his head. It makes me think that perhaps I'm just way too focused on it. I know it sounds cliche, but more often than not, mom knows best. I've really been trying to see things her way and just move on. It would be such a relief to not care and focus on other things.

On Thu, Dec 16, 2010 at 9:50 PM, <danaiconnie@...> wrote:

That's a good point, caden_mom, because we had to pay $3500 of the $3800 for our doc band. So the fact that he is risking paying 20% of the cost might be a good sign that he should at least try.

[Guest guest]

,

It sounds like the consensus from the pediatric world is that he does not "need" it but the orthotists disagree.

I totally understand your concerns about it impacting your marriage, but if you ultimately decide not to go with a helmet, I recommend you at least try some alternative treatments to help move the correction along.

I read a few studies and have talked to some parents where, as long as there were no other underlying factors like torticollis, the plagio will spontaneously improve over several years. Does your son have anything like that? When I found out my son had leftover tightness from undiagnosed torticollis our CST and PT began working on it immediately and that has greatly improved his skull shape.

If you can consider at least sending a scan out of the shape of his head that would be helpful. I am also hesitant to share my son's pictures and have only shared them with certain individuals who have been very helpful in our journey. Estrella Moeller

From: Kapell <jasonkapell@...>Plagiocephaly Sent: Fri, December 17, 2010 6:56:44 AMSubject: Re: Re: doc band without support from spouse unrealistic?

Thad, danaiconnie, I'm not a huge fan of posting pictures of my kids online. I can tell you that my boy has plagio on his right sideresulting from torticollis that was successfully treated with PT. He has no facial asymmetry, and his right ear is a bit anterior to the left. His forehead is perfectly square. His profiles are nearly identical.Cranial Tech measure his cranial vault as being 10mm "off". The funny thing is that they reported facial asymmetry and bossing in the forehead which I felt was a TOTAL stretch. I mean, nobody hasscrutinized this poor kid more than me, and I can tell you that his forehead is perfectly square, and his face has no more asymmetry than anyone else without plagiocephaly. To be sure, if you look at his headfrom a bird's eye view, you can see that there is flattening, and from a 3/4 view, his head is a bit "taller" on his right. But as for

facial asymmetry and "bossing"...it just isn't there, and it did give me pause as to whether Cranial Tech was trying to "pad" the evaluation. No fudging from the pedi. I went to Cranial Tech without consulting him. CT sent the photostudy and measurements to him, and he wrote the RX based on that. The pedi feels it's unnecessary, as do 2 other pedi's in the practice (I've gotten 2nd and 3rd opinions). I mean, my son DOES qualify, but that doesn't mean he needs it. Dr. A (my third opinion) who has 2 young children of her own, said that she wouldn't if he was her boy. This was 3 days ago. I appreciate the advice and humor. Any more feedback you guys have to offer would be great.My feeling is that he's not going to get a helmet, mostly because I fear it would put a lot of pressure on my marriage. Also, if the helmethas minimal effect, it may be the

cause of self-esteem issues rather than the solution. What I mean is that there's a very realpossibility that my son, his sister, cousins, extended family and friends never would have noticed except for the fact that he was obviously in a helmet device for a period of time as a little kid which must mean something was "wrong"with him. Why point it out to him and the world? It's like a neon sign. "In case you didn't notice, my son's head is bit flaton the right side!" Certainly, his 7 year old sister and older cousins will not likely forget it. Kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy. It's a lot to process.Of course, if it totally rounded out his head, there would be no problem. But that's a big "if". Can you tell I'm being torn apart by this?

On Fri, Dec 17, 2010 at 12:06 AM, Thad Launderville <p38thadl@...> wrote:

You've not posted photos or measurements, which each of us would haveto weigh against our experiences to calculate an complete opinion ofworthwhile-ness. I suppose your pediatrician, like mine, fudged thenumbers with a measuring tape in order to justify the prescription toinsurance? So, photos would mean more to me.Our experience: we had a slightly positive outcome overall, with aSTARband provider and a similar-age baby (see our pictures; Iestimate 3 mm correction), but it was at least successful inimproving an eye tracking problem, therefore worthwhile. We sold itto Clara as a "pretty hat." She enjoyed the attention, the havingsomething that her twin didn't, and the routine daily shampoo. Onceher skin acclimated, having the helmet off felt itchy, so there is abit of self-reinforcement,

there, too. She may have even felt iteasier to focus her vision and attention immediately, with thehelmet's structural support. The treatment was more stressful to methan anyone, necessitating confrontation with the orthotist andmanufacturer to re-make the helmet.I had (and still have) more ire for the pediatrician, and indeed, mayalready have been suffering from a Don Quixote complex before thiswhole plagiocephaly quest. If you have a hard time finding the goodin other people, this probably ain't gonna help. You may welldiscover that there is NO ONE with whom you can completely entrustyour child's welfare. "Ignorance is bliss," but ignorant people suredo make enlightenment a drag!Again, I can't say whether your son's problem can be ignored. Basedon previous posts, I speculate that you're looking at brachycephalywith no functional concerns.

(Reasoning that, if your son weredevelopmentally delayed, saucer-eyed and mushroom-crowned, morepeople would be on board with the treatment.) While I believe it isgenerally harder to correct brachycephaly than asymmetricalplagiocephaly, the expertise demanded of the orthotist is less. Lessheat rash, less pushing on the one eyebrow, less rotation against theone ear -- which means less discomfort for the kid, less pushing andprodding the orthotist, and most importantly, less for your family tocomplain about.So, my opinion: the esthetic return on your investment will probablybe low, but the treatment itself should be fairly stress-free, onceyou resolve the disagreement with your family.In that argument, I'll personally vouch that a STARband comes inhandy when you're locked out of your car at Kmart and your kiddecides to dive backward out of the cart onto a cement floor

whileyou're distracted. You said your insurance didn't actually cover theDOC band, right?Thad Laundervilletown, VTClara age 2 1/2, STARband '10

On Dec 16, 2010, at 10:21 PM, Kapell wrote:> It would be such a relief to not care and focus on other things.------------------------------------

For more plagio info

[Guest guest]

On Dec 17, 2010, at 9:56 AM, Kapell wrote:

[snip]

> I can tell you that my boy has plagio on his right side resulting

> from torticollis that was successfully treated with PT. He has no

> facial asymmetry, and his right ear is a bit anterior to the left.

> His forehead is perfectly square. His profiles are nearly identical.

> Cranial Tech measure his cranial vault as being 10mm " off " . The

> funny thing is that they

> reported facial asymmetry and bossing in the forehead which I felt

> was a TOTAL stretch. I mean, nobody has scrutinized this poor kid

> more than me, and I can tell you that his forehead is perfectly

> square, and his face has no more asymmetry than anyone else without

> plagiocephaly. To be sure, if you look at his head from a bird's

> eye view, you can see that there is flattening, and from a 3/4

> view, his head is a bit " taller " on his right.

> But as for facial asymmetry and " bossing " ...it just isn't there,

> and it did give me pause as to whether Cranial Tech was trying to

> " pad " the evaluation.

Well, that sounds a LOT like my Clara, then, actually. And I

strongly wish I could have made it to Cranial Tech. The weight of

her STARband seemed to act quickly on the " tallness " aspect, but the

fit just was not effective for much of the treatment period,

prolonging the treatment and diminishing her results.

> No fudging from the pedi. I went to Cranial Tech without

> consulting him. CT sent the photostudy and measurements to him,

> and he wrote the RX based on that. The pedi feels it's

> unnecessary, as do 2 other pedi's in the practice (I've gotten 2nd

> and 3rd opinions). I mean, my son DOES qualify, but that doesn't

> mean he needs it. Dr. A (my third opinion) who has 2 young

> children of her own, said that she wouldn't if he was her boy.

> This was 3 days ago. I appreciate the advice and humor. Any more

> feedback you guys have to offer would be great.

Yep, I've heard all that standard BS, too, even though my daughter's

eye was crossed! ( " Pseudostrabismus. " ) Even an orthotist will

downplay the necessity of treatment, if it looks like it's going to

fail. But you've already breached the iron curtain that they hoped

would stop the capitalist hordes, just by getting an evaluation. 1

cm diagonal difference is helmet-worthy by insurance standards; now,

let fly the hammer of freedom!

Besides the eye, I personally used to worry about migraines (which

her mother has had), sinus problems (which I have had), and TMJ

(grandmother) down the road for Clara. With 8 mm remaining asymmetry

and a few months without it worsening behind us, I only worry about

TMJ. That few mm made a big difference.

Those are just my gut feelings, and Clara's ears are probably further

" off " than your kid's. But for what it's worth, here's MY standard

line: drive, drive, drive away, onward to civilization, and get that

DOC band, if there's any way possible! By the mighty power of fossil

fuel, you can cut right through the milieu of throwbacks who are all

too happy to waste your precious time.

> My feeling is that he's not going to get a helmet, mostly because I

> fear it would put a lot of pressure on my marriage.

I don't really understand, honestly, but maybe the challenge here is

to find an inoffensive way to communicate that you forgive her pelvic

bones for deforming your son's head? There might be some guilt

fueling the denial. Maybe it was about overusing the baby carriers

with you guys? I would think 10 mm is pretty evident to anyone

looking down on the top of the head with a finger in each ear.

During a bath if necessary to flatten the hair. Draw attention to

the angle of the nose as it constrasts with the cranium.

> Also, if the helmet has minimal effect, it may be the cause of self-

> esteem issues rather than the solution. What I mean is that

> there's a very real

> possibility that my son, his sister, cousins, extended family and

> friends never would have noticed except for the fact that he was

> obviously in a helmet device for a period of time as a little kid

> which must mean something was " wrong " with him. Why point it out

> to him and the world? It's like a neon sign. " In case you didn't

> notice, my son's head is bit flat

> on the right side! " Certainly, his 7 year old sister and older

> cousins will not likely forget it. Kind of a self-fulfilling

> prophecy. It's a lot to process.

> Of course, if it totally rounded out his head, there would be no

> problem. But that's a big " if " . Can you tell I'm being torn apart

> by this?

My twins play " measure your head " with store-type, open-bottom coat

hangers, but that's my fault for buying calipers and doing it (to

both of them) at home. I admit, Clara is the shy one, but we also

have ultrasound video demonstrating the pre-existence of their

distinct personalities. I have neither seen nor heard of negative

self-esteem effects. They're so adaptable at this age, any number of

infantile coping mechanisms can be called upon to make them own the

helmet and circumvent learned helplessness.

Every day, my wife comes home and asks the girls what they did

today. Invariably, the answer is, " We went to Grandma's. " Well,

Grandma's not feeling well, so they haven't been there in over a

week. This is the positive flip side of believing there are monsters

in the closet. There's just no way to keep them from fulfilling

their little wishes and being happy!

--

Thad

[Guest guest]

I just had to smile at some of your comments.

My husband, too, has thinning hair, and I would like to think that our son (7 months old, 4th week in a Starband) would have some options when he gets to be middle-age (to shave his head completely, or not to).

Your comment RE: mothers convincing fathers...my husband could have gone either way, but I was pretty insistent. I just didn't want to have any regrets. When we saw the pediatric neurosurgeon, he pulled my husband aside and said that, typically, the mothers will win this battle. Gross generalization, but yes, I think we moms tend to be more trigger-happy about the helmet than you men folk.

- It's worth all the trouble, really, it is. We are already seeing dramatic improvements. As for going out in public, we're not even self-conscious of the helmet anymore. Our lil guy is just so darn cute in it, and I think his smile and personality are what most people see.

-anne

From: danaiconnie@... <danaiconnie@...>Subject: Re: doc band without support from spouse unrealistic?Plagiocephaly Date: Thursday, December 16, 2010, 6:46 PM

Well, I bet most of the people here are those who do get helmets or other treatment so you should expect people to say go ahead and do it if you think it's neccesary.

I can't tell from your posts how mild it is so your wife may have a point that it is not necessary. But if you think there is a noticeable deformation that people would see as he gets older then I understand why you are exploring this. My husband thought it was a dumb idea too until I told him about my grade school classmate they would call "boxhead", and when the nanny, after 3 months of repositioning treatment said, "Hey, did you know his head is flat back here?". We were hoping it wasn't noticeable and was getting better, and hadn't even mentioned it to her. But she said something unsolicited so we knew we weren't just seeing things when we saw the plagiocephaly. That, coupled with me pointing out my husband's receding hairline and his thoughts of going bald convinced him that we were just going to have to suck it up and get the helmet, so as to not to regret it in adulthood if our son asks why we didn't do anything about his head. This

is interesting because, often, (and I know this is a generalization) it is the mother trying to convince the father to do something like this. And not just plagiocephaly related but for a lot of different healthcare issues. It's usually the man who is like, "let's wait and see", or "that's bull and they are just trying to get your money", or "nobody will notice and you're worrying about nothing". I am dealing with my husband thinking the sleep apnea monitor is crap because of some false alarms, when I think that is a totally idiotic thing to just ignore breathing issues. Two sleep studies have established that the baby stops breathing at night and has low oxygen saturation, and he has asthma. But still my husband thinks the commercial Angelcare baby movement monitor is better just because it doesn't go off as much. That monitor cannot compare to a hospital grade piece of equipment and it doesn't monitor the heart like the apnea monitor does. Anyway, so

I just take responsibility and sleep in the room with the baby until we are done with this monitoring. And it seems like you have a similar plan in place to deal with the helmet care since your wife is reluctant. If you decide to do it, hopefully you can come to an agreement that she will not undermine your efforts (take the helmet off just because the baby fusses) as long as you do all the work involved. If she will be working against you, then that would be unrealistic to try. But it is not unrealistic for you all to agree to disagree about having the helmet. And, really, I know older babies who have had helmets and it wasn't as bad as you make it seem, as far as having to explain to him and family about why he has the helmet. With my baby, some older kids at the park even asked their moms if they could get a helmet and some adults mistook it for just a regular crash helmet he liked to wear. Several other parents and grandparents would tell us that

their kids had helmets and they were glad they did. We did get ours painted with his name on it and cute monkeys swinging from palm trees on it so it didn't look as medical as the plain white ones. Lastly, I'm sure your baby will still be cute in the helmet. My older brother said he was amazed that even with an ortho helmet on, the baby was still beautiful.