To Katja (from new guy)

[Guest guest]

I'd like to thank Katja for her thoughtful, comprehensive response. I

appreciate your comments and experience.

Regarding my decision. I think it's a little unbalanced that all the

opinions I'm hearing are " Yes, go ahead and do this surgery. "

To make it fair, I'd also like to read the opinions of people who

decided NOT to do it. " I decided not to do this surgery for reasons X,

Y, and Z. I have no regrets that I avoided it, because A,B,C. The

quality of my life is currently <whatever>. "

Now where can I also read THOSE opinions? Probably not here...

Thanks a lot

[Guest guest]

Comprehensive was one word for it! You're welcome... Here are a couple

thoughts in response to some of yours....

This is a surgery support site- so most members are seeking support as

they go through this process, and then also providing it to others who

are right along with them in the process. It is also a valuable

resource to have access to the message archives and all the links etc.

for info gathering. Definitely check out the archives. Search under

words like " decision " or " undecided " ... and archives will come up of

others going through this same dialogue trying to decide. I have read

of members who've joined seeking information and input and have

decided against the surgery ultimately. Those messages are there in

the archives if you dig them up.... When I first joined, I was seeking

advice too. I think all of us are sharing with you our personal paths

to the decisions we made- how we made them, our reasoning, our

motivation- to provide you with some different perspectives and

insight on the whole question. We are trying to provide you with many

different factors to consider that you hadn't yet thought about. There

are very few people who haven't chewed on the decision to have the

surgery or not. Most of us went through some kind of process to decide-

and yes you have for the most part, a group that decided to go ahead

with it. I don't think anyone is telling you to have the surgery. We

all understand that it's such a personal decision. There are members

that were told for years that they needed the surgery and they decided

against it over and over, finally ending back up here and in the OR

line-up ultimately. They originally said no. They changed their minds

later. Others never consider it again. Other people never have

problems that escalate and they don't think twice about possibly

needing the surgery. I've even read of people who were set to go and

it was decided ultimately that they didn't need the surgery after

all.

Why people have decided against it? The risks aren't worth it for some

people. Some people simply cannot overcome their fear. You have to be

comfortable with the idea that you may never regain feeling, that the

surgery may not be a success or could relapse, etc. and still be

comfortable going ahead with it. The risks aren't worth it for

everyone. Or people examine their motivations closely and realize that

surgery won't fix what the true problem is- low self-esteem for

example. Or they don't want surgery just for cosmetic reasons.

Sometimes external factors dictate decisions- no insurance coverage

and no money. No time because life circumstances won't allow it. Maybe

people try another route to correct their problem that is less

invasive...

I would research this thoroughly and the information itself about the

surgery/ recovery/ risks will illuminate for you very clearly why

people have decided for or against having the surgery. Unfortunately,

I don't think much research and info gathering has been done about the

group of people who do not undergo the surgery... more on those of us

who have. I had your same questions... think about asking your

dentist/ an orthodontist if they know of anyone- once considering the

surgery who is also willing to discuss why they decided against it,

etc. You, at least, do have quite a few people on this site with bios

that read something like " I knew I needed the surgery since I was 22,

but put it off for years because XYZ, and this has how my quality of

life has progressed since then with ABC, and now at 47, I am finally

biting the bullet and having this done. " Some add, " I wish I had done

this long ago, but just couldn't because QRS. " There ARE those

members, and quite a few of them. Search in Archives!!! There are

years worth! Go to town!

One last note about age: You heal more readily (in general) in your

youth than you do as you get older. Your body (generally) tends to be

more resilient- and more quickly bounce back. Personally, I would not

chose to have this surgery done when I was older vs. the opportunity

to have it done now when I am younger. There are exceptions, but

statistically.... youth is on your side in this one.

Anyway, I'm sure we'll all be interested to hear what you decide

ultimately! Good luck and take your time- if all else fails, listen to

your gut instinct.

Katja

> I'd like to thank Katja for her thoughtful, comprehensive response.

I

> appreciate your comments and experience.

>

> Regarding my decision. I think it's a little unbalanced that all the

> opinions I'm hearing are " Yes, go ahead and do this surgery. "

>

> To make it fair, I'd also like to read the opinions of people who

> decided NOT to do it. " I decided not to do this surgery for reasons

X,

> Y, and Z. I have no regrets that I avoided it, because A,B,C. The

> quality of my life is currently <whatever>. "

>

> Now where can I also read THOSE opinions? Probably not here...

>

> Thanks a lot

[Guest guest]

Please don't feel that I was trying to convince you to have any

treatment, surgical or non-surgical. I only can speak from my

experience and how quickly my symptoms worsened. You may never have any

of the typical symptoms. My response was only to say I would not base

my decision on dating. I do respect your honesty and desire to gather

many opinions. I don't think you'll find a lot of people on this site

that have decided not to have the surgery, as surgery support is the

nature of the site. However, you may find some that wish they had

not. Again, this is a very personal choice and in the end, you are the

only one that knows what is right for you. Good luck!

Rene`

> I'd like to thank Katja for her thoughtful, comprehensive response. I

> appreciate your comments and experience.

>

> Regarding my decision. I think it's a little unbalanced that all the

> opinions I'm hearing are " Yes, go ahead and do this surgery. "

>

> To make it fair, I'd also like to read the opinions of people who

> decided NOT to do it. " I decided not to do this surgery for reasons

X,

> Y, and Z. I have no regrets that I avoided it, because A,B,C. The

> quality of my life is currently <whatever>. "

>

> Now where can I also read THOSE opinions? Probably not here...

>

> Thanks a lot

[Guest guest]

> > I'd like to thank Katja for her thoughtful, comprehensive

response.

> I

> > appreciate your comments and experience.

> >

> > Regarding my decision. I think it's a little unbalanced that all

the

> > opinions I'm hearing are " Yes, go ahead and do this surgery. "

> >

> > To make it fair, I'd also like to read the opinions of people

who

> > decided NOT to do it. " I decided not to do this surgery for

reasons

> X,

> > Y, and Z. I have no regrets that I avoided it, because A,B,C.

The

> > quality of my life is currently <whatever>. "

> >

> > Now where can I also read THOSE opinions? Probably not here...

> >

> > Thanks a lot