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Hi all,

My two cents on the letter by Jim's teacher friend. I thought her response

to Jim's inquiry was interesting. It's an opportunity for us to stand in a

teacher's shoes for a few moments and imagine what it might be like to

teach so many students with such different needs. To me, it sounded as if

she copes by laughing at her situation ocasionally...not by laughing at the

needs of the *children* she's trying to help. This is probably a healthy

thing. Does this mean I'm any less likely to push for the specific

accomodations my child may need? Of course not. It's the teacher's job to

balance the needs of the kids in his/her class. It's my job as a parent to

make sure my child gets what she needs.

Perhaps I'm feeling a little more respect for teachers having just come

home from doing reading groups with second graders. I think I'm pretty

strong on discipline and maintaing control but after an hour with 10

" normal " kids who were silly, disruptive, hyperactive and generally

annoying, I was grumpy! (However, the experience is always good for me as I

can see it's not just Kelsey...a lot of this *is* age-typical behavior.)

On the other hand, I may end up homeschooling myself. I really don't want

to. Plus I work. And I think Kelsey needs the social opportunities school

provides to keep building her skills. But she continues to be stressed by

the pace in the classroom. I will continue to observe and try to figure out

why and what we should do about it, but if this starts to look like a

long-term trend, we may eventually opt out.

Take care,

in San Diego

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  • 8 years later...

Thanks Colleen -of course that letter or any other I would recommend

a parent take a tweak to fit their child -not copy word for word as

from looking at the one you sent quickly to me it appears some is

there but some is missing such as (depending upon the age) the

communication book. I have from the archives some letters to new

teachers from Kathy and other teacher/parents in our group that we've

used over the years and not to toot my own horn but like Kathy I gave

a copy of The Late Talker book to every new teacher that Tanner had

with a little note in it. He's not the first nor will be the last

child to pass through their classroom door with a speech delay and

I've found each teacher to not only read the book (not because they

said they did but because each brought up aspects from the book to

me) but develop a deeper respect for Tanner's struggles.

(PS in the archives is a letter to a new teacher for a child with

autism -again keep in mind it can be used and tweaked)

(PSS and if it's apraxia just call it apraxia!)

Ali takiu@...

Re: [ ] Composing a letter to new teacher

I am a high school special ed teacher and the parent

of a 4 year old daughter with apraxia.

Teachers need as much parentel help as they can get.

I appreciate parents who become involved in the

learning process and interact with me about testing.

If your teachers school has email for the instructors

as my school does email can be an easy way to find out

just what is each teacher doing with your child.

Testing for a non-verbal child of your childs age can

include but is not limited to:

Listening Skills - teacher reads or tells a story and

student puts pictures in order to show understanding

of sequence of events.

Patterns - student can be shown a pattern and then

choose an object to complete the pattern

Colors and Shapes - student can be given a template

with the learned items on them and asked to identify

by pointing to show knowledge of color or shape.

Math skills can be tested through writing if student

has mastered writing numbers.

Spelling tests are written not spoken so standard test

can be given if student has mastered the written

alphabet.

A non-verbal child who has not made a written

conection is much harder to test than one who is

functioning at grade level in written performance

it depends on where your child is

hope this helps

[ ] Marj for School Problem

Dear Marj,

My first move would be to write a letter to the teacher. Keep

documentation

of EVERYTHING you write and EVERYTHING they send you. Here's my

initial

letter.

--------

November 7, 2002

Miss smith

ABC, AnyCity, USA

Dear Miss ,

Dr. B, MD and myself have had the opportunity to review your

detailed observations of my son, ny while he is present in your

classroom.

Firstly, I would like to remind you that autism is a neurological

disorder. ny has autism and his behaviors are symptoms of what

is going on

in his brain at this time.

Some of the approaches you have chosen to employ have been

questioned by

Dr. B,. For example, requiring a 8 year old child with autism to

put his head down on his desk is not only unconscionable and

outrageous, but

described by Dr. B as demeaning.

Having Lukas sit on the floor while you restrained him with your

legs is

not an acceptable restraint technique. Admittedly, you relayed that

ny

repeatedly said " no, " " stop it, " " all done, " " sorry " and " be nice. "

Children

with developmental disabilities in their desperate efforts to

communicate are

ignored while staff force compliance for oftentimes trivial reasons.

The

cumulative effects of repeated restraint can lead to diminished self-

image

and negative attitudes. Behavioral restraints are neither treatment

nor

education. They are merely procedures or methods that restrict

freedom of

choice and adversely affect the human development of people with

disabilities. The use of restraints should be considered a failure in

education

What are the antecedents before the behavior happens? In order to

address

these issues I will be requesting additional support specifically to

complete

a functional analysis of his behavior in your classroom. My

behavioral

philosophy is that people with challenging behaviors need our

support and

help. Blame is counterproductive and makes the situation worse. In

the long

term, teaching more adaptive skills is much more effective than only

reacting.

Since all students with autism have difficulty understanding social

interaction (although the degree may vary), this may impact on their

school

experience both within the classroom and in other school settings

(i.e.

lunchroom, playground). If this is the case, other school staff

should be

given appropriate interventions and strategies. Since these students

are

socially naive, they are vulnerable to predatory students within the

school

environment.

If ny has behavioral issues, any intervention must examine

possible

causes arising from the features of autism. Frequently the primary

focus will

be on teaching appropriate behavior rather than punishment. Generic

behavioral interventions are often ineffective and may inadvertently

reinforce the undesired behavior. For example, time out used as a

consequence

may increase the behavior.

Punishment focuses on the action, not the cause. It generally

results in

a child's anger, disrespect, revenge or defeat.

Discipline addresses the cause of the behavior and helps create a

safe

positive learning environment. It takes commitment and planning.

We hope you find the enclosures helpful in dealing with our

handicapped

son more appropriately.

Regards,

______________________________

P

______________________________

Charlene P

Letter to teacher

archive from Tue Aug 29, 2006 9:22 pm

Altoonakenton@...

Altoonakenton@...

..... wrote that I gave the Late Talker Book to the SLP at my sons'

school....and with her permission she " autographed " it (read between

the

lines)...my very good friend with excellent penmanship wrote a

beautiful note

inside the book (again from and with her permission) basically

saying what

a great job she was doing with her friends (who are my twins with

apraxia) and

that one day when she wrote her next book she would be contacting her

to add

what terrific methods she had been using to help (my children) her

friends

speak. Needless to say I am sure by now you know that this particular

school SLP

is not one that I am especially fond of because she basically knows

nothing

about apraxia..even with her CCCs after her name....of course, I had

to mention

what good friends and her husband Glenn and children Tanner and

Dakota

are....and basically we all know through this site anyway,

right?? So I

wasn't making anything up and I prayed that the book and thought of

contacting her would help....

Again, everything I thought of doing I asked first as she has no

hangups

about saying " NO " ..It's a Jersey thing...LOL....Kathy NJ (and no, I

had

nothing to do with writing that particular letter to the teacher that

was

previously referred to in another post)

> >

> > I had my computer crash and lost many file. I have a letter that

> had been

> > posted on the in the past year of a letter to teacher introducing

> the child and

> > apraxia. Does any one have a copy of this letter.

> >

> > Thanks in advance for your help

> >

> > Lauric

Altoonakenton@...

Altoonakenton@...

Robin and

I don't know how you could write that story and bring up everything

your

family went through...you and your daughter are OBVIOUSLY very

strong and

committed to not letting this happen to others....!!! Fortunately,

for Mel she

had

you.........but this is happening everywhere today........even while

I sit in

the " waiting room " for my children during speech the parents are

always talking

together.......the stories that they share that are happening to

their

children today are horrible......and these parents DO NOT KNOW THEIR

RIGHTS and

the

schools know this. One woman admitted to me that she was poor

(thinking I guess

that that is why they do not give her son the services that are

quite evident

that he needs) and I honestly don't know if she could write so

another woman

and I wrote a letter to her child's CST. There is only 1 advocate

that covers

2 huge counties where we live so she had no help.

So in front of me I am seeing this happen---and it sickens

me......especially

being a teacher!

I also went to different sites 3 years ago and until CHERAB did I

see any

progress in my children. We could talk about apraxia, IEPS, schools,

etc for

years and years. Something needs to be done so that we do not have

to talk

about

the constant out of compliance in IEPS and lives like 's and

her

families being destroyed by our US educational system.

If permitted, I would like to add 's story to what I bring to

parent/teacher conferences along with the signed Late Talker book to

prove my

point of

getting what is needed now and that we are all out here together as

a group

and will not allow our children to get anything less that what they

need!

Thank you for sharing what has to be the worst parts of your lives

with me.

I am willing to help with whatever it takes!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Kathy NJ

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I feel silly...I've looked thru the files, links and database

section and did not see the ASD letter to the teachers. Can someone

help me out?

> > >

> > > I had my computer crash and lost many file. I have a letter

that

> > had been

> > > posted on the in the past year of a letter to teacher

introducing

> > the child and

> > > apraxia. Does any one have a copy of this letter.

> > >

> > > Thanks in advance for your help

> > >

> > > Lauric

>

>

> Altoonakenton@...

> Altoonakenton@...

> Robin and

>

>

> I don't know how you could write that story and bring up everything

> your

> family went through...you and your daughter are OBVIOUSLY very

> strong and

> committed to not letting this happen to others....!!! Fortunately,

> for Mel she

> had

> you.........but this is happening everywhere today........even

while

> I sit in

> the " waiting room " for my children during speech the parents are

> always talking

> together.......the stories that they share that are happening to

> their

> children today are horrible......and these parents DO NOT KNOW

THEIR

> RIGHTS and

> the

> schools know this. One woman admitted to me that she was poor

> (thinking I guess

> that that is why they do not give her son the services that are

> quite evident

> that he needs) and I honestly don't know if she could write so

> another woman

> and I wrote a letter to her child's CST. There is only 1 advocate

> that covers

> 2 huge counties where we live so she had no help.

>

> So in front of me I am seeing this happen---and it sickens

> me......especially

> being a teacher!

>

> I also went to different sites 3 years ago and until CHERAB did I

> see any

> progress in my children. We could talk about apraxia, IEPS,

schools,

> etc for

> years and years. Something needs to be done so that we do not have

> to talk

> about

> the constant out of compliance in IEPS and lives like 's and

> her

> families being destroyed by our US educational system.

>

> If permitted, I would like to add 's story to what I bring

to

> parent/teacher conferences along with the signed Late Talker book

to

> prove my

> point of

> getting what is needed now and that we are all out here together as

> a group

> and will not allow our children to get anything less that what they

> need!

>

> Thank you for sharing what has to be the worst parts of your lives

> with me.

> I am willing to help with whatever it takes!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Kathy NJ

>

>

>

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it's not really a letter to the new teacher as it's a letter to

a teacher who wasn't treating the child with autism correctly -but

it's a letter you can pull from- use bits from various letters you

see here and add to it. We each know our child best. Here's the

clean version of the ASD letter from below:

Dear Marj,

My first move would be to write a letter to the teacher. Keep

documentation

of EVERYTHING you write and EVERYTHING they send you. Here's my

initial

letter.

--------

November 7, 2002

Miss smith

ABC, AnyCity, USA

Dear Miss ,

Dr. B, MD and myself have had the opportunity to review your

detailed observations of my son, ny while he is present in your

classroom.

Firstly, I would like to remind you that autism is a neurological

disorder. ny has autism and his behaviors are symptoms of what is

going on

in his brain at this time.

Some of the approaches you have chosen to employ have been questioned

by

Dr. B,. For example, requiring a 8 year old child with autism to

put his head down on his desk is not only unconscionable and

outrageous, but

described by Dr. B as demeaning.

Having Lukas sit on the floor while you restrained him with your legs

is

not an acceptable restraint technique. Admittedly, you relayed that

ny

repeatedly said " no, " " stop it, " " all done, " " sorry " and " be nice. "

Children

with developmental disabilities in their desperate efforts to

communicate are

ignored while staff force compliance for oftentimes trivial reasons.

The

cumulative effects of repeated restraint can lead to diminished self-

image

and negative attitudes. Behavioral restraints are neither treatment

nor

education. They are merely procedures or methods that restrict

freedom of

choice and adversely affect the human development of people with

disabilities. The use of restraints should be considered a failure in

education

What are the antecedents before the behavior happens? In order to

address

these issues I will be requesting additional support specifically to

complete

a functional analysis of his behavior in your classroom. My behavioral

philosophy is that people with challenging behaviors need our support

and

help. Blame is counterproductive and makes the situation worse. In

the long

term, teaching more adaptive skills is much more effective than only

reacting.

Since all students with autism have difficulty understanding social

interaction (although the degree may vary), this may impact on their

school

experience both within the classroom and in other school settings

(i.e.

lunchroom, playground). If this is the case, other school staff

should be

given appropriate interventions and strategies. Since these students

are

socially naive, they are vulnerable to predatory students within the

school

environment.

If ny has behavioral issues, any intervention must examine

possible

causes arising from the features of autism. Frequently the primary

focus will

be on teaching appropriate behavior rather than punishment. Generic

behavioral interventions are often ineffective and may inadvertently

reinforce the undesired behavior. For example, time out used as a

consequence

may increase the behavior.

Punishment focuses on the action, not the cause. It generally results

in

a child's anger, disrespect, revenge or defeat.

Discipline addresses the cause of the behavior and helps create a safe

positive learning environment. It takes commitment and planning.

We hope you find the enclosures helpful in dealing with our

handicapped

son more appropriately.

Regards,

______________________________

P

______________________________

Charlene P

=====

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Whoops left off the following she also sent

MANAGEMENT TECHNIQUES, OBSESSIVE, COMPULSIVE AND SELF-INJURIOUS

BEHAVIOR

by Lawson

Problem:

Parents/Teachers are currently asking for management techniques for

'autistic' behaviors that their children with autism display.

Definitions:

Management techniques

According to the Oxford dictionary (1969) to manage something or

someone

means to be able to " have effective control of, bend to one's will,

cajole...

bring about, secure, deal with or handle with skill... " This could be

interpreted to mean that any strategy that can be used to

successfully enable

a situation or behavior to be 'controlled, managed, used profitably

and/or

contained, to produce desired response, results or profit, for the

owner of

such management, might be useful. However, for the purpose of this

paper the

term 'handle with skill' will be used. This implies appropriate

management

that both respects the client, having their needs uppermost in mind,

and

fosters an atmosphere of cooperation leading to desired outcomes.

Autistic behaviors

According to Wing (1992) autistic behaviors, as earlier defined by

Kanner

(1942), consists of: aloofness, indifference towards others,

obsessive and

compulsive behaviors, resistance to change, repetitive behaviors,

lack of

expressive language, and of 'pretend' play.

Specific behaviors that parents find 'difficult' appear to be

connected to

the compulsive, repetitive and obsessive behaviors that are anti

social,

and/or embarrassing and/or a danger to self or others (Asperger

Parents

Support Group, 1996).

Wing (1992) suggests that positive reinforcement of any small move in

the

direction desired is very rewarding. She likens it to the child's

game of Hot

and Cold and says that " ultimate success is assured with this step-by-

step

reinforcement. Wing does, however, suggest that reinforcement is not

the same

as rewarding desired behavior with an offered 'bribe' for change.

Rather it

is offering 'encouragement' for any sign of behavior that is desired.

The

example given relates to one parent's story of reinforcement for her

son

through complementing him on his table behavior " you know, Barry, you

talk

much less at the table than you used to. And sometimes you listen to

what

others say and follow the dinner conversation. " Apparently this

statement

brought a marked change in Barry's tendency to monopolize the

conversation at

dinner time. Wing points out that such statements or compliments need

to be

repeated often and follow-up compliments would enhance the learning.

Another 'strategy' for behavior management is making sure that all

instructions are precise and concrete. Keep all instructions simple -

set up

schedules of importance i.e. Brush hair, brush teeth, etc. (Wing,

1992)

Teachers at a school for autistic children on the southern region of

have noted certain strategies for one child's aggressive and/or

antisocial

behaviors. They are as follows:

For hitting, either adults or children, the following steps are

outlined:

1. maintain arms length where possible

2. verbally " hands down " - conversational tone

3. physically direct arms down

4. redirect to task

Kicking

Adults strategy - endeavor to be at side during all activities (not

in front

of child). Ignore, and then redirect to current activity.

Throwing self onto floor

Ignore for 30 seconds - say nothing during this period " stand up " and

then

redirect

Head butting

Always work form the side. Ignore, move away, work with child. Return

to

finish task later.

Trashing room

Verbal reprimand instantly " No... " (define what it is) repeat twice.

Protect

other students. Say " leave table please. " Ignore, invite back to

group if

child says " No " leave, repeat after 60 seconds.

http://www.mugsy.org/wendy/manage.htm

Modifying Inappropriate Behaviors

Why is my child acting like this?

http://autism.about.com/library/weekly/aa112100a.htm

We have all heard the praises of Early Intervention repeated again

and again.

We know that it works. We know that the earlier we begin working with

an

Autistic/PDD child, the better chance he/she will function like other

children. Recently the American Academy of Pediatrics published new

Early

Screening Guidelines that help to identify children who may be in

need of

early intervention. These are helpful, but they don't answer the

question on

everyone's mind. What can I do at home to change the Autistic

behaviors?

Everyone who has to deal on a daily basis with an Autistic/PDD child

knows

that from time to time behavioral modifications are necessary. There

are some

behaviors that Autistic children exhibit that are socially

unacceptable and

whether you are a parent, caregiver, teacher or have some other close

relationship with the child, you wonder what to do. How to change

these

behaviors, however, can be a challenge.

Research has shown that there are things which can be done to help

change

behaviors and turn the behavioral patterns of the child to other

behaviors,

so that he/she can cope with the stresses of society. The first step

is to

identify the behaviors that are inappropriate. Find out details of

what

happens when the behavior occurs. Look at what happens before the

behavior is

exhibited. Is there a pattern or a " trigger " that starts the

behavior? Look

at the reactions of others to the behaviors. Do their behaviors

toward the

Autistic child lead to more inappropriate behaviors? Look at the

consequences

of the behavior. Is the behavior harmful to the child or others?

Next, attempt to discover the purpose the behavior serves to the

child. All

behaviors serve a function. They are not random. Whether it is to gain

attention, gain a tangible object, escape from a consequence or

release

tension, each behavior is there for a reason. Sometimes the reasons

are known

only to the child, but in many cases they are able to be discerned,

if you

only look closely. Remember too that some behaviors are the result of

other

Autistic characteristics. For example, many Autistic children have

receptive

language deficits. To some people, a child not paying attention to

what

he/she is told to do, is a sign of rebellion or defiance. In reality,

to the

Autistic child, it may be a sign that he never processed the message

to do

the action in the first place.

Once the behavior is determined and its function analyzed, the next

step is

to identify alternate, acceptable behaviors with which you wish to

replace

the inappropriate ones.

The purpose of finding alternatives when dealing with inappropriate

behaviors

in the Autistic/PDD child is two fold. First, it is to

create " socially

acceptable " behaviors which can become the " normal " behavior of the

child.

Secondly, to find behaviors which meet the needs that the original

behavior

met. It does no good to find a new behavior if it doesn't meet those

needs.

It then simply becomes more of a reason for frustration.

The focus of an alternate behavior should not simply be to " control "

the

inappropriate behaviors, but to use the new behavior to increase the

skills

of the child. For example, if the child hits when he/she becomes

overwhelmed,

teaching the child to say or sign " break " when he/she starts to become

frustrated might work. It would allow the caregiver or parent to know

that

the particular thing going on is causing a sensory overload problem,

and to

therefore change what is happening to lessen the stress on the child.

Of

course, as this is done, consistency must be maintained. The parent

can not

expect the child to learn that saying " break " will lead to a

reduction in the

stress caused by over stimulation, if it sometimes does and sometimes

doesn't. Close observation of the child often can help the parent

determine

when a child is starting to have problems with sensory overload or

frustration. Many children will hold their hands over their eyes or

ears

prior to acting out. When we find the " indicator " of the behavior,

then we

can intervene early and it presents an excellent learning opportunity.

Finding alternative behaviors is sometimes difficult. The child may

not have

the skills necessary to perform the new behavior. In the example

above, if

the child has problems with expressive language, he may not be able

to say

the word. This easily could lead to more frustrations than the were

present

before the new behavior was begun, and therefore backfire on the

parent/caregiver. If the desired behavior is not something the child

already

has in his/her repertoire, then it must be taught first and

integrated into

the behavioral patterns of the child.

One key to teaching an alternative behavior is the development of a

system of

reinforcement. Rewards can be small things that the child has shown a

desire

to have, but they often do not have to be tangible. Autistic

children, like

all others, have an innate desire to please those with whom they are

in close

contact. Simple praise may be enough to help reinforce the appropriate

behavior. One thing to keep in mind is that many Autistic children

have

difficulty " reading " body language and facial expressions. In order

to avoid

these problems, something that shows pride in what they have

accomplished,

but does not require the child to make a judgement on the meaning of

an

expression would be applause. When the child meets the expected

behaviors,

verbal praise accompanied by hand clapping is an excellent reinforcer.

Many people think that if a system of positive reinforcement

(rewards) is

used to teach a new behavior, then it must follow that a system of

negative

reinforcement (punishments) must go along with that when the child

does not

meet the goals. This is not true. The lack of a reward is a strong

negative

reinforcement. Usually, other means are not needed, if the system of

rewards

is established and followed consistently.

Identifying behaviors that need change, and teaching acceptable

replacement

behaviors is a time consuming process for both the parent/caregiver

and the

child. If used, however, this process has worked successfully for many

people, both as individuals and in the educational setting. The

keyword for

working with this process is consistency. By consistently following a

pattern

of positive reinforcement, behaviors can be taught that will benefit

the

child in his/her efforts to meet social expectations.

=====

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