IEP meeting did NOT go as planned. ;(

[Guest guest]

Sorry, but I need to vent... My son had his transition IEP meeting

today. I was originally told that he would have the same teacher as my

daughter (different class), with the same SLP, and that the SLP

mentioned 2 individual sessions a week, 1 group. The OT recommended (in

writing) 1 group OT/ week.

Today I found out that

1> they changed his teacher.

2> They changed his SLP. The 'new' one was not at the meeting today,

and we haven't met her. (The original SLP has seen Nick many times on

parent days).

3> They offered him ST 2x/ wk group and 1x/ indiv.

How the *% & # can they expect an apraxic child to do well in a group

when he can barely speak!? They told me that since they hadn't eval'ed

him (I brought in an eval from June), they want to work with him before

offering more sessions, and that I can call a meeting in Feb to discuss

my concerns. They agreed to put the potential Feb meeting into the IEP.

In their defense, they took another district's IEP for my daughter and

within a month, called me to offer her an additional session a week.

I'd like to believe that they'd do the same, but I also know the system

better. Another plus is that they already signed him up for Extended

School Year.

I just don't know what to do about the group sessions. On top of all of

this, I got into an argument with my husband. I mentioned pulling Nick

off of fish oils with little regression last time, but after a week it

kicked in at full force. He couldn't round his lips, lost some sounds,

and on his worst day was starting to close-mouthed speak again. If you

corrected, he spoke properly, but not on his own. Even the SLP said she

was nervous seeing it. (However, his sensory issues totally

disappeared). He's back up to 2 EFAs a day (almost no difference on 1),

and you can see a huge improvement, but not where he was on 4 with 2

EPAs. I told my husband that in order for the school SLP to see Nick as

he really is, I'd have to pull him off the oils again, and my husband

freaked. I swear, he sees my son an hour a day, tops. It hurts me a

thousand times more to not understand Nicky all day, to be the one to

go to the therapies, meetings, and doctors, to make the decision to

start fish oil, and the much harder decision to stop the oils

(especially after seeing what happened the first time!). He really is

great at supporting me, but sometimes I still feel alone, ya know?

And just for the punch line to this whole story, I got dx'ed with

hypertension yesterday. There's some irony to all this going on on the

first day I have to take blood pressure meds.

Sorry to vent, especially because I know there are people out there in

much harder situations than me. Thanks for any advice that you can

offer me.

[Guest guest]

Hi

first and foremost ((BIG HUGS))! As one whose husband thinks she 's occasionally

addicted to the internet (perhaps I am - insert embarrassed face here) but who

has learned so much and been the sole person to advocate for my children, I

understand where you are coming from re: family. It's hard sometimes to find

that balance.

Re; your IEP, I'm assuming this is the transition from EI to special ed

preschool (once a child turns 3?) My dd and one I've lived thru special ed with

thusfar is not apraxic but this same thing came up. They didnt even think she

qualified for special ed preschool. I used independent evals plus research

that's out there to substantiate her need. Sometimes it's necessary to pay for

the private eval to show the school district what they arent seeing, altho you

can also get denied services and request an eval by someone of your choosing (I

believe) and if it goes in your favor you'll be reimbursed I believe (hopefully

others here can elaborate).

Group speech was going to be a complete joke for my dd who had at the time

severe receptive/expressive language issues. I was ready to *let* them see their

mistake if need be but didnt want to waste that time. Fortunately in our case

the district overseeing the IEP was different than the district trying to call

the shots and the one TRULY calling the shots felt she needed everything I

wanted and more. We almost moved as I felt so validated but all worked out and

she ended up in special ed preschool locally and did really well. I'm not sure

on the teacher/SLP front in your case cause schools can change personnel and

while disappointing to us all, dont think they have any obligation to have set

personnel in certain places as long as someone with the appropriate training is

in the spot... However if the SLP your child had been seeing is still at the

school but just can't see due to case load or whatever, I'd argue in favor of

continuing with this person based on " continuity of care,.

"

Remember (I have to keep reminding myself of this too)..: Your child's needs

dictate services (so dissect carefully, yet granted what we as parents see and

the district see, may well be two different things).. But from these *needs* the

goals of the IEP are written.

So if student johnny can't sit still and pay attention to save his life, group

speech is a joke and waste of time. That was my dd and unfortunately I had to

point that out, even to those whom (I thought) knew her, yet much was coming

from the " higher-ups " who truly knew nothing of Spectrum or Speech disorders but

were more into bullying parents into accepting less. They had no clue. The thing

that's always killed me is that raising children is hard enough. Raising SN kids

is even harder - in some cases REALLY hard (I'm fortunate in that my dd is super

mellow and my easy child). I hate that we have to fight and fight to get

services for our kids. We've used every ounce of our savings.. every ounce of

every penny of equity in our home paying privately for ST. It was worth it. It

was.. We will be fine, but now as times are tough, I worry. We have nothing " to

fall back on " and the bio-med that so helped many years ago is now gone as we

can't afford the approx $100-150 per month. So I

'm now on a new bandwagon... have just joined a Kaiser group - to help

parents turned down on services. Parents ARE gettin services covered - it''s a

fight. Unfortunately we've got to start somewhere and until someone does it wont

happen so this is my mission. BTW... my dd is doing really well - now in first

grade - first year in mainstream classroom as all previously were in special ed

and last year we homeschooled. Her report card came home last week and while her

attentional issues and fine motor (she has weakness on on her right side) are

issues, she's performing at the 90% for reading, spelling and math. She has

friends even tho her language is still immature. I worry for her future but

suspect she's way more savvy than I give her credit for! I now continue my

fight as my 2 yr old, it appears may be apraxic - the fun just never ends! I

must say, once in the system and using some of the lingo you learn first time

around.. I didnt get any flack (NOT sure that's a bene

fit as I sure dont with being in the system another time around on anyone )

BUT do believe our little guy will do well. Don't back down on what you believe.

Document everything. Write your IEP/IFSP before you go in based on what you know

of your child; take a tape recorder or a friend; dont get angry or upset if you

can help it... be objective and factual and facual and objective when you

plainly tell the District that offering your " what's available is essentially

illegal " and that your child needs x,y,z and perhaps the meeting needs to be

reconvened to such and such time when the District can find that support and

have that support present to discuss how to address my child's needs " ... Granted

that means some delay and that's not good either.. So pick the best path. Go to

wrightslaw.com and study. They've got some great books too. Sorry so long. I

wish you the best and so sorry you're dealing with this!

Leigh