Re: Feeling Emotional - New to Group

[Guest guest]

Hi,  We all have those days where we just feel sad. that's just a normal

reaction when you have a child dx'd with anything.  it's a rollercoaster of

emotions sometimes.

What I found with my son (who's now 11!) at nursery school was we got the other

kids involved.  Now, my son didn't have ANY words until his first at 4.5 years

old and I have

to say the kids were amazing for the most part.  there was one little boy who,

when on a field trip, turned to the person during the presentation and said

" don't ask him questions he's learning to talk "

and preceded to tell the woman that if she wanted to ask a question to ask

him instead cuz he was helping! I darned near passed out with the sweetness of

that!

If you feel good about the school and teachers, i wouldn't feel guilty.  Kids,

like us, have off days too and that's ok. It will take a bit of time for

everyone to get to know each other and the routines.

Just relax and see how it all plays out. You might be surprised.

sandy

________________________________

From: raq22002 <estherramadan@...>

Sent: Wed, September 29, 2010 11:05:33 PM

Subject: [ ] Feeling Emotional - New to Group

 

Wondering if there happens to be a support group in the Dallas / Plano Texas for

Apraxia. My 4 year old son was diagnosed with Mild Apraxia in May. In therapy

through the Summer and making gains. I just have my days. Especially ones like

today. When I picked him up from preschool and he playing alone in a corner

looking at books, while the other children are playing together and doing a

craft. Normally he does the craft but today, he decided not to participate. The

teacher says he's not talking much at school. It just breaks my heart because I

know he's a different child with me than he is with others that can't understand

his words / sentences. I don't think he has the confidence to attempt to talk. I

thought I would be strong as my oldest who is now 6, was a late talker and had

severe articulation disorder was able to get caught up by 4 1/2 and start

Kindergarten at 5. I feel alone with this. Sad at times...And guilty putting him

in preschool 3 days a week. On school days he says " awwww " as in " bummer " put

goes without a fuss. I know he'd probably rather be home with me, playing &

communicating. Any others struggle with these thoughts? How did you pull

through? I'm just broken today with that image of him alone in the corner. The

teacher told me she really tried to get him to participate today, but he just

denied her. It's a new school for us. I feel good about the school and

teachers....Just feel for my little one! Thanks for letting me get that out!-

[Guest guest]

Hi Esther,

I totally can understand how you feel as my 4 year old is also late talker

and caregivers/teachers have problems understanding what he wants esp when

he is not using the right words to express his anger/frustration. He has

temper tantrums very often and his teachers are very good at being calm yet

firm with him. He loves school and like your 4 year old, would only

participate in activities if it interests him. On some days, he may like to

paint while some days he could not even stand the touch of it on his hands.

As long as he doesn't refuse going to school, he is just getting himself

adjusted to the classroom environment. Allow him to have some quiet time, it

helps him regulate all the sensations that he receives from his friends and

teachers. Find out what he enjoys doing from class teacher and talk to him

about it at home. It would be helpful if you could get hold of pictures of

him engaging in some fun activities. Like you already know, he is gaining

verbal confidence and children (like ours) feel intimidated when in the

company of peers who are very verbal and would choose to stay silent mostly.

It breaks our hearts when we see our little gems not involved in common

group activities but who said it is a must to be conforming all the time?

Another helpful tip would be to partner him with a suitable playmate from

class. The class teacher would be the best person to ask. Relationships

formed with classmates will help him room in the classroom environment. He

needs to also have plenty of opportunities to play alongside other children.

My son has social skills deficit and I arrange for playdates almost 5 days

per week. He is not resisting playmates who plays gently and would do

parallel play. He's not good at pretend play and I need to work on that

aspect. My son still has a long way to go in terms of picking up critical

skills, we all have to be there for them; so hang in there, mom!

cheers,

sook-wei

[Guest guest]

Hi,

My son has severe apraxia, and just started kindergarten. I completely empathize

with you... at home with me and his three siblings, he's a social rock star,

engaged, exuberant, unaware, really of his marked delay. There were many days

last year that I would pick him up at preschool and there would be free play,

and he would be playing alone, while the other kids were engaged with each

other.

I put a lot of thought into how to engage him socially with his peers this year,

and I drafted a letter that I wanted to distribute to the parents, basically

saying, Hi, this is my son, this is what he has, (he also has a g-tube...

doesn't use it that much anymore, but used to have reflux), but otherwise he's a

normal boy who loves rocket ships, superheroes, etc. I gave a copy of the letter

to the teacher, and asked her if she'd be OK with my sending it to the parents

of the other children in the classroom. I also suggested that I, or the guidance

counsellor, or the SLP go into the classroom at circle time one day, when my son

was not there, to explain what apraxia was, as well as a gtube, etc.

We had a meeting with his teacher, the special ed. liaison, and the guidance

counsellor, and they said they were " putting a pause on the letter. " They

thought it was calling attention to his difference, instead of allowing him to

integrate. They thought neither a classroom visit, nor a letter were

appropriate.

I said, OK, thinking they are the experts, they must know.

I am constantly questioning this decision... my son can't speak like his peers

do, he sounds very different, stilted, unclear, and pauses A LOT to get across

an idea, sometimes he succeeds, sometimes not. Wouldn't it help if the kids

understood why this is the case?

Please don't think I'm being insensitive. I don't mean to overwhelm or take over

your posting. But I thought that maybe by writing this, people who have

successfully facilitated in integrating their kids socially at school might

share some ideas or tips?

Thanks,

Nadine

>

> Hi,  We all have those days where we just feel sad. that's just a normal

> reaction when you have a child dx'd with anything.  it's a rollercoaster of

> emotions sometimes.

> What I found with my son (who's now 11!) at nursery school was we got the

other

> kids involved.  Now, my son didn't have ANY words until his first at 4.5

years

> old and I have

>

> to say the kids were amazing for the most part.  there was one little boy

who,

> when on a field trip, turned to the person during the presentation and said

> " don't ask him questions he's learning to talk "

> and preceded to tell the woman that if she wanted to ask a question to

ask

> him instead cuz he was helping! I darned near passed out with the sweetness of

> that!

>

> If you feel good about the school and teachers, i wouldn't feel guilty. 

Kids,

> like us, have off days too and that's ok. It will take a bit of time for

> everyone to get to know each other and the routines.

> Just relax and see how it all plays out. You might be surprised.

>

> sandy

>

>

>

>

> ________________________________

> From: raq22002 <estherramadan@...>

>

> Sent: Wed, September 29, 2010 11:05:33 PM

> Subject: [ ] Feeling Emotional - New to Group

>

>  

> Wondering if there happens to be a support group in the Dallas / Plano Texas

for

> Apraxia. My 4 year old son was diagnosed with Mild Apraxia in May. In therapy

> through the Summer and making gains. I just have my days. Especially ones like

> today. When I picked him up from preschool and he playing alone in a corner

> looking at books, while the other children are playing together and doing a

> craft. Normally he does the craft but today, he decided not to participate.

The

> teacher says he's not talking much at school. It just breaks my heart because

I

> know he's a different child with me than he is with others that can't

understand

> his words / sentences. I don't think he has the confidence to attempt to talk.

I

> thought I would be strong as my oldest who is now 6, was a late talker and had

> severe articulation disorder was able to get caught up by 4 1/2 and start

> Kindergarten at 5. I feel alone with this. Sad at times...And guilty putting

him

> in preschool 3 days a week. On school days he says " awwww " as in " bummer " put

> goes without a fuss. I know he'd probably rather be home with me, playing &

> communicating. Any others struggle with these thoughts? How did you pull

> through? I'm just broken today with that image of him alone in the corner. The

> teacher told me she really tried to get him to participate today, but he just

> denied her. It's a new school for us. I feel good about the school and

> teachers....Just feel for my little one! Thanks for letting me get that out!-

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

I found in my experience, that when kids don't understand something, they fear

it.  once the teacher explained that my son was learning to talk they were fine

because ...finally.....someone explained what they were sensing.  it did call

attention to the differences, but you can't not explain those differences to

kids as they are waaay smarter than we think.

We did find that by explaining the differences all the " little mothers " took

over and that is something that everyone learns from.  How are kids supposed to

learn empathy if they don't see it?  By not explaining to the kids I feel it

makes it worse because if the adults are all hush hush about it....something

must be wrong.  There are kids who won't be sensitive to this, but that is just

part of life, it  happens.

I feel being open and honest to children is always the best policy.  when

things

are explained to them in a positive way most tend to stand up and really shine

and that's just positive all the way around. I would hope the school would be

open to explaining this to his classmates in a way they feel is best.

just my opinion

sandy

________________________________

From: nadineck <nadineck@...>

Sent: Fri, October 1, 2010 12:02:11 AM

Subject: [ ] Re: Feeling Emotional - New to Group

 

Hi,

My son has severe apraxia, and just started kindergarten. I completely empathize

with you... at home with me and his three siblings, he's a social rock star,

engaged, exuberant, unaware, really of his marked delay. There were many days

last year that I would pick him up at preschool and there would be free play,

and he would be playing alone, while the other kids were engaged with each

other.

I put a lot of thought into how to engage him socially with his peers this year,

and I drafted a letter that I wanted to distribute to the parents, basically

saying, Hi, this is my son, this is what he has, (he also has a g-tube...

doesn't use it that much anymore, but used to have reflux), but otherwise he's a

normal boy who loves rocket ships, superheroes, etc. I gave a copy of the letter

to the teacher, and asked her if she'd be OK with my sending it to the parents

of the other children in the classroom. I also suggested that I, or the guidance

counsellor, or the SLP go into the classroom at circle time one day, when my son

was not there, to explain what apraxia was, as well as a gtube, etc.

We had a meeting with his teacher, the special ed. liaison, and the guidance

counsellor, and they said they were " putting a pause on the letter. " They

thought it was calling attention to his difference, instead of allowing him to

integrate. They thought neither a classroom visit, nor a letter were

appropriate.

I said, OK, thinking they are the experts, they must know.

I am constantly questioning this decision... my son can't speak like his peers

do, he sounds very different, stilted, unclear, and pauses A LOT to get across

an idea, sometimes he succeeds, sometimes not. Wouldn't it help if the kids

understood why this is the case?

Please don't think I'm being insensitive. I don't mean to overwhelm or take over

your posting. But I thought that maybe by writing this, people who have

successfully facilitated in integrating their kids socially at school might

share some ideas or tips?

Thanks,

Nadine

>

> Hi,  We all have those days where we just feel sad. that's just a normal

> reaction when you have a child dx'd with anything.  it's a rollercoaster of

> emotions sometimes.

> What I found with my son (who's now 11!) at nursery school was we got the

other

>

> kids involved.  Now, my son didn't have ANY words until his first at 4.5

years

>

> old and I have

>

> to say the kids were amazing for the most part.  there was one little boy

who,

>

> when on a field trip, turned to the person during the presentation and said

> " don't ask him questions he's learning to talk "

> and preceded to tell the woman that if she wanted to ask a question to

>ask

>

> him instead cuz he was helping! I darned near passed out with the sweetness of

> that!

>

> If you feel good about the school and teachers, i wouldn't feel guilty. 

Kids,

>

> like us, have off days too and that's ok. It will take a bit of time for

> everyone to get to know each other and the routines.

> Just relax and see how it all plays out. You might be surprised.

>

> sandy

>

>

>

>

> ________________________________

> From: raq22002 <estherramadan@...>

>

> Sent: Wed, September 29, 2010 11:05:33 PM

> Subject: [ ] Feeling Emotional - New to Group

>

>  

> Wondering if there happens to be a support group in the Dallas / Plano Texas

>for

>

> Apraxia. My 4 year old son was diagnosed with Mild Apraxia in May. In therapy

> through the Summer and making gains. I just have my days. Especially ones like

> today. When I picked him up from preschool and he playing alone in a corner

> looking at books, while the other children are playing together and doing a

> craft. Normally he does the craft but today, he decided not to participate.

The

>

> teacher says he's not talking much at school. It just breaks my heart because

I

>

> know he's a different child with me than he is with others that can't

>understand

>

> his words / sentences. I don't think he has the confidence to attempt to talk.

>I

>

> thought I would be strong as my oldest who is now 6, was a late talker and had

> severe articulation disorder was able to get caught up by 4 1/2 and start

> Kindergarten at 5. I feel alone with this. Sad at times...And guilty putting

>him

>

> in preschool 3 days a week. On school days he says " awwww " as in " bummer " put

> goes without a fuss. I know he'd probably rather be home with me, playing &

> communicating. Any others struggle with these thoughts? How did you pull

> through? I'm just broken today with that image of him alone in the corner. The

> teacher told me she really tried to get him to participate today, but he just

> denied her. It's a new school for us. I feel good about the school and

> teachers....Just feel for my little one! Thanks for letting me get that out!-

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Sorry, Sandy, for the late response... if you're still reading this thread, I

completely agree. I am going to reopen the issue with the school.

Thanks!

Does anyone know, re the original posting, whether there are support groups in

Plano/Dallas area, or how to find out about them?

I feel as though I may have railroaded the original post a bit, and really

didn't mean to, because it was important.

> >

> > Hi,  We all have those days where we just feel sad. that's just a normal

> > reaction when you have a child dx'd with anything.  it's a rollercoaster

of

> > emotions sometimes.

> > What I found with my son (who's now 11!) at nursery school was we got the

other

> >

> > kids involved.  Now, my son didn't have ANY words until his first at 4.5

years

> >

> > old and I have

> >

> > to say the kids were amazing for the most part.  there was one little boy

who,

> >

> > when on a field trip, turned to the person during the presentation and said

> > " don't ask him questions he's learning to talk "

> > and preceded to tell the woman that if she wanted to ask a question to

> >ask

> >

> > him instead cuz he was helping! I darned near passed out with the sweetness

of

>

> > that!

> >

> > If you feel good about the school and teachers, i wouldn't feel guilty. 

Kids,

> >

> > like us, have off days too and that's ok. It will take a bit of time for

> > everyone to get to know each other and the routines.

> > Just relax and see how it all plays out. You might be surprised.

> >

> > sandy

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > ________________________________

> > From: raq22002 <estherramadan@>

> >

> > Sent: Wed, September 29, 2010 11:05:33 PM

> > Subject: [ ] Feeling Emotional - New to Group

> >

> >  

> > Wondering if there happens to be a support group in the Dallas / Plano Texas

> >for

> >

> > Apraxia. My 4 year old son was diagnosed with Mild Apraxia in May. In

therapy

> > through the Summer and making gains. I just have my days. Especially ones

like

>

> > today. When I picked him up from preschool and he playing alone in a corner

> > looking at books, while the other children are playing together and doing a

> > craft. Normally he does the craft but today, he decided not to participate.

The

> >

> > teacher says he's not talking much at school. It just breaks my heart

because I

> >

> > know he's a different child with me than he is with others that can't

> >understand

> >

> > his words / sentences. I don't think he has the confidence to attempt to

talk.

> >I

> >

> > thought I would be strong as my oldest who is now 6, was a late talker and

had

>

> > severe articulation disorder was able to get caught up by 4 1/2 and start

> > Kindergarten at 5. I feel alone with this. Sad at times...And guilty putting

> >him

> >

> > in preschool 3 days a week. On school days he says " awwww " as in " bummer "

put

> > goes without a fuss. I know he'd probably rather be home with me, playing &

> > communicating. Any others struggle with these thoughts? How did you pull

> > through? I'm just broken today with that image of him alone in the corner.

The

>

> > teacher told me she really tried to get him to participate today, but he

just

> > denied her. It's a new school for us. I feel good about the school and

> > teachers....Just feel for my little one! Thanks for letting me get that

out!-

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Thanks for all your kind words and support! I am finding that if I spend some

time here I will find some answers to some of my concerns. My 4 year son still

likes to put some inappropiate objects in his mouth: playdough, flowers,

lotion, etc....It's almost like he wants a small taste...I guess he is still

exploring with his mouth....And that I need to find him food textures to do that

with. I do find that he says " EEEeeee and puts his left hand infront of his

face " occasionally and I'm sure what to do about that. I haven't been told he

does that at preschool and I haven't noticed him doing it in public like he does

at home...I'm sure it's something neuro but not sure if it's something I need to

deal with or let him grow out of. My oldest used to look out the corner of his

eyes when he walked down the hall with his head straight ahead...He grew out of

it. If anyone knows an exercise or what I should be doing to fuel this stimulus

need, please let me know...Other than that he doesn't do anything else sensory

that I noticed. Thanks again!!

>

> Wondering if there happens to be a support group in the Dallas / Plano Texas

for Apraxia. My 4 year old son was diagnosed with Mild Apraxia in May. In

therapy through the Summer and making gains. I just have my days. Especially

ones like today. When I picked him up from preschool and he playing alone in a

corner looking at books, while the other children are playing together and doing

a craft. Normally he does the craft but today, he decided not to participate.

The teacher says he's not talking much at school. It just breaks my heart

because I know he's a different child with me than he is with others that can't

understand his words / sentences. I don't think he has the confidence to

attempt to talk. I thought I would be strong as my oldest who is now 6, was a

late talker and had severe articulation disorder was able to get caught up by 4

1/2 and start Kindergarten at 5. I feel alone with this. Sad at times...And

guilty putting him in preschool 3 days a week. On school days he says " awwww "

as in " bummer " put goes without a fuss. I know he'd probably rather be home

with me, playing & communicating. Any others struggle with these thoughts? How

did you pull through? I'm just broken today with that image of him alone in the

corner. The teacher told me she really tried to get him to participate today,

but he just denied her. It's a new school for us. I feel good about the

school and teachers....Just feel for my little one! Thanks for letting me get

that out!-

>