Better News

January 19, 2006

In a message dated 1/19/2006 8:53:30 AM Eastern Standard Time,

inspiringmind@... writes:

They let him

stay in the office for awhile until asked to go back to the classroom.

Now the Principle says that my advocate called her and talked to her about

being separated from the rest of the class and how it says in the Idea

Law that if a school knows he has a problem then they have to provide

assistance for him. I told her that has a Behavior Plan and she asked

me where? (Ha, I have seen it before!) I told her his teacher has one and

he has had one since last year.

Well, if he has one, it's not working or it should be updated to include the

new behavior issue(s). It would not be a " static " document - a " one time "

and now it's done sort of thing. And your advocate is correct.

<<The Principle went on to say that the

medication is not working; we need to get him on new meds. Abilify takes

about 3 to 6 weeks to take full effect though. She said she wanted us to get

him in to see a new DR because a doctor needs to diagnose him and give him

meds. Well, for that one I later got a call from his Doctor that he has

been seeing for over a year. He said that instead of us having to get in to

seeing a new doctor that is out of town that he would go ahead and send a

letter to the school verifying that he is an Aspie child and he even agreed

about the medication!! >>

Personally, I try to let my doctor be the doctor and the principal be the

principal. unless the principal has a medical degree, I would not be talking

meds with him/her. They have no business recommending meds or recommending to

change meds or to take meds. They are not doctors. What principal seems to

be saying is that they want a magic pill to make the behaviors go away. And

that does not happen. They need someone who is educated in ASD behaviors to

come and do an assessment and help set up a behavior plan that works. This

won't be a one time thing but an ongoing process. This person can also help

educate the staff about Asperger's/HFA.

<<, the

school principle wants us to discipline him at home because of his behavior

at school. I keep trying to get across to her that they are going about this

the wrong way and that at home he doesn't get to play X-Box or anything

until he does some homework, But when he does do some homework that he gets

to play. She stated that they don't have that option at school. >>

I totally disagree. If the school does it's job, then they dont' have to

worry about you playing the meanie at home. Tell Principal to concentrate her

energy on finding an appropriate ASD expert to help them do their job. And

you will concentrate on home life. What an ass.

<<The

principle also tried to tell the Advocate that I have that I have that she

didn't have to be at the meeting on Monday (Which is supposed to be with the

Behavior Team not the MDT team) but we both said that we are going to be

there. They are required by law to invite me and anyone I wish to be at all

meetings about 's behavior and his plans. >>

Great, make sure your advocate is at all meetings! And this behavior team

better have people on it that know what ASD is and how to deal with it.

Roxanna ô¿ô

Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.

January 19, 2006

I talked to a lot of people yesterday. Where to start! They had the same

problems yesterday that they have been having; lying on the floor not

wanting to do school work and tripping other kids. The principle tried to

call us but both of us were at our classes at the college. They let him

stay in the office for awhile until asked to go back to the classroom.

Now the Principle says that my advocate called her and talked to her about

being separated from the rest of the class and how it says in the Idea

Law that if a school knows he has a problem then they have to provide

assistance for him. I told her that has a Behavior Plan and she asked

me where? (Ha, I have seen it before!) I told her his teacher has one and

he has had one since last year. The Principle went on to say that the

medication is not working; we need to get him on new meds. Abilify takes

about 3 to 6 weeks to take full effect though. She said she wanted us to get

him in to see a new DR because a doctor needs to diagnose him and give him

meds. Well, for that one I later got a call from his Doctor that he has

been seeing for over a year. He said that instead of us having to get in to

seeing a new doctor that is out of town that he would go ahead and send a

letter to the school verifying that he is an Aspie child and he even agreed

about the medication!! Boy is the school going to be ticked off about this

but Oh well. His therapist, who he is seeing tomorrow, says there is going

to be a Family Plan and that there will be someone else introduced into all

this. Basically she will be going to 's school and be like a one on one

aide and that she can even come into our home and help out. Today I have

lots to do, like going to the school and having them fax over the paperwork

to the Doctor's Office so he can send them back a diagnoses. Also, the

school principle wants us to discipline him at home because of his behavior

at school. I keep trying to get across to her that they are going about this

the wrong way and that at home he doesn't get to play X-Box or anything

until he does some homework, But when he does do some homework that he gets

to play. She stated that they don't have that option at school. and

his teacher were doing something to that effect at school, but it was a

Chess game. said something about that and they were doing that, but

they stopped for some reason. So, things are going as they are going. The

principle also tried to tell the Advocate that I have that I have that she

didn't have to be at the meeting on Monday (Which is supposed to be with the

Behavior Team not the MDT team) but we both said that we are going to be

there. They are required by law to invite me and anyone I wish to be at all

meetings about 's behavior and his plans.

Mommy to - 9 - Aspie

- 8 - ADHD

January 19, 2006

Hi ,

sounds so much like your school does not understand your child at all!!!! so

sad. I had made it very clear with all involved with my AS son, to the school,

therapy, etc... that if he acts inappropriately with you. you need to find an

appropriate discipline that relates to the behavior and apply it immediately.

And then talk about the appropriate behavior that he should have so my son knows

what he should do. at a later time when my son gets home, its already out of

his head on what happened and will not have that same impact on him at a much

later time. I know each child is different but don't you agree that if you do

something wrong, the consequence should follow ASAP? like if you were speeding

while driving your car. you would get the ticket right then. not the next time

the traffic cop See's you. you would say " that wasn't me " . Does your school

have a social skills group? Do they do roll play? ABA? I got to tell you when

I went to my CSE meeting I had two advocates

there with me. Do you think it would be a good idea if you requested for your

advocate, or therapist to go to your child's classroom to observe him? like do

a classroom observation? Maybe the problem can be " caused " by the " teacher " . or

someone in the class? Do you have team meetings each month? that helps me alot

to understand my sons needs in school. it sounds like instead of your school

communicating with you and all working together. that the school does not

understand your son and wants to blame you instead. (How convenient for the

school!) every time they say something to you about your son, ask them, how are

you going to work with that? are you going to start a social skill class? what

strategy are you going to try next to help my son? Don't you wish you can tell

them it's not my son that needs the medication " you do! " cause they don't seem

to have enough patients to take the time to work with him. Also, children are

very smart. they can see their are

concerns with your son. Now, that makes him a TARGET! the slightest thing,

they are going to put the blame on YOUR SON. or provoke him, and guess who gets

caught!. This should also be brought up at the CSE meeting. Your son is now a

target at school. If the teacher has experience with autism, she can make this

a classroom lesson instead of putting all the focus on YOUR SON. that is how

" he would be made a target " and get picked on and he will act out. If any of

this helps, or what others wrote had helped you. put a list together with all

that relate to your son and bring it up at the CSE meeting. Ask them for copies

of your sons folder and keep it in a safe place at home. When is your meeting?

good luck

** <inspiringmind@...> wrote: