Re: (MOSAIC) IEP Tomorrow

[Guest guest]

All of my correspondence has been in written form and thus documenting my concerns. Thanks.elevatordance <elevatordance@...> wrote: If its not in writing, it didn't happen. Have all of your requests you described in your email been in writing? If not, start there. Dear Case managers name, this letter shall serve to outlline all of my parental concerns regarding my son's Individual Education Plan. 1. He has

extreme anxiety 2. Inadequate progress in improving his math skills 3. Inadequate progress in improving his social skills with his peers. Just list out all of the goals from his last year's IEP and complain that there has been inadequate progress. It is the goal of the IEP to improve his skills, if the skills are not significantly better then the education plan to address them must change. There needs to be a program to improve his social skills with peers at lunch, just like he needs a special program toi mprove his math skills it is not just going to happen. If they balk, then you should calmly start discussing how to see other placements that would provide the necessary programs to improve these skills. If the current placement is not successful, then they need to move him to a more restrictive environment that can provide the necessary educational plan to teach him the skills. Just keep thinking

like that during the entire IEP. What is his deficit? what should the program be to teach him the skill? Can this school provide the appropriate education? Should he move to another placement? If they want to save money and not move him, they might wake up a little and approve extra help. Tell the case manager that you want your evaluation you paid for to be included under Parental concerns in the IEP. It has NOTHING to do with the triannual evaluation in future years. The one comment I have to make is "how far are you willing to go to get the right program for your son?" You have to search your soul but if you have everything documented in writng and they still refuse, you will have to go to mediation or due process to get what he needs and that means an advocate or lawyer. You should document everything as

well as possible and see wht happens. I think you only have 10 days to respond to dispute the IEP. From: MICHELLE STRAUSS <mandmstrauss >Reply-Mosaic-List To: Mosaic-List Subject: Re: (MOSAIC) IEP TomorrowDate: Tue, 3 Jun 2008 12:34:35 -0700 (PDT) Just one more note to that..... it always seems to work against us, and I don't know you of course, someone advised me long ago to try not to be the "emontional parent" at these meetings. I was told it does not help to cry, etc. I don't know if that rings true or not. It also sounds like having an agenda infront of you is a good idea that way you have everything clear and in front of you. These teachers and case managers have no clue about the social end of the spectrum. It is such a heart breaking issue. Unless it is experienced first hand no oneone cares. There is no "report card" for social skills that's why it does not count.edv <archeo_one2001 > wrote: Hi, You can prepare a "parent agenda" to highlight the points you would like to discuss at your IEP meeting tomorrow. Your email to MOSAIC is already a great start to an outline

for an agenda. Bring the agenda to your IEP meeting tomorow - have copies for each person in attendance. Make notes next to each point on your copy so you can clearly offer reasons for your request. If they refuse to accomodate your requests, ask them to put the reason "why" they can't accomodate it in writing. I have a son with Aspergers. He is in 6th grade and has had a one-on-one aide since Grade 1. His current IEP will allow him to have an aide through 7th grade. If the CM works with the aide or if you can do so, she can find ways to be "unobstrusive" and give him the independence if/when he needs it. Make some copies of what characteristics of Aspergers Syndrome are (go to the ASPEN NJ website they have great resources) and give the classroom teacher and all those attending (and Case Manager if you deem appropriate) a copy as well. Their comments about your child "outgrowing" certain behaviors are based on ignorance of the

diagnosis You do not have to sign the IEP at the meeting - take home a draft copy, mark up what you feel is not satisfactory and you can write a letter with your comments, be sure to respond within 14 days and send copies to the case manager and District Supervisor of Special Services. If you want any more info, you can email me privately archeo_one2001 Good Luck!> Hi Everyone,> > I am hoping someone can help me at the last minute> as I am preparing for my IEP tomorrow.> > My son is a 9 year old with Aspergers (severe> attention issues, sensory issues) who is currently> mainstreamed with in class support for math and an> aide that is shared. My son has had major> difficulties this year not only with academics> (math), but socially more than anything. The school>

provides a social skills group during speech and a> social worker comes during recess twice a week to> run a social skills group (she has been putting them> in a room to watch Underdog). This has not been> enough. He does not have any friends and none of> the children want to sit near him at lunch or be> around him. He is isolated. He has told us that he> cannot wait for school to end so that he does not> have to be around these "mean people". Due to the> anxiety associated with all of this, he has been> seeing a therapist for about 9 months now. I have> spoken repeatedly with the teacher and case manager> but they do not feel it is a serious issue. The> teacher believes that we need to give> him time and eventually some of his behaviors (off> topic conversation, personal space etc.) will> improve. I completely disagree. I have requested> an aide during

lunch as well as more communication> between the speech therapist, social worker and> psychologist. The teacher believes that an aide> will make him stand out. That is a moot point, he> already stands out. I get frustrated because I am> told things are fine and then I find out about> things that the other children do to my son and> obviously things are not fine. Does anyone have any> other suggestions? I have suggested a lunch bunch,> a buddy. I have asked for disabilities awareness> for his class, but have not made progress.> > In addition to the social problem, he has been> struggling with math. He went from the resource> room to in class support, but still does not know> simple addition and subtraction facts. I have asked> for supplemental support or for him to go back to> the resource room. They do not agree. My son has> barely kept up only

because we work with him at home> everyday and he has a tutor who works with him twice> a week. He needs more support than he is currently> receiving.> > We just had a neuropsychological evaluation done> and gave it to our case manager to support our> requests. He informed me that if he takes my> reports the evaluation clock for the district to do> their evaluation starts again. Basically the> district would not have to do their own evaluation> next year. Complete nonsense.> > Can anyone give me any suggestions as to what else> and how I can convince my district to provide more> support?> > I apologize for the long e-mail.> > Your help is greatly appreciated.> > Thanks,> Luz> >

[Guest guest]

Hi Everyone, Thanks again for all your comments, I appreciate it. My IEP lasted 3 hours and unfortunately we could not come to any agreement. We had requested that my son receive more than in class support for math and we were told that the options were in class support or the resource room, but that he is too high functioning for the resource room. We reminded the case manager that this is an individualized plan and that we need to find what is best for my son not simply what is out there. The case manager was adamant. The teacher stated that she thought in class support was best for him, but that if we as parents felt it wasn't right then he should listen to us. She told him that he should not create a point of contention between us and the teachers, but he did not care. We gave them our neuropsychological reports supporting our points, but he disregarded them. As far as our social skills are concerned, the social worker that they had brought in from the outside did not think it would be a good idea for him to have an aide during lunch. She stated that she observes him and that he was fine. I then asked why my son had no friends, had never been asked on a play date in 2 years nor invited anywhere by anyone, but they could not answer. I then explained the situations my son relays about children putting peanut butter in his face (he is severely allergic) so that he does not sit with them, but nothing was said. They stress that I need to give him time and in time these skills will come. Time does not cure Aspergers. I am frustrated but not deterred. I have an ally in the teacher and will be meeting alone with her to discuss other solutions. Sorry for the long e-mail, but I wanted to let everyone know how it

went. Thanks again, Luzluz velez <luzadrianna1970@...> wrote: All of my correspondence has been in written form and thus documenting my concerns. Thanks.elevatordance <elevatordance@...> wrote: If its not in writing, it didn't happen. Have all of your requests you

described in your email been in writing? If not, start there. Dear Case managers name, this letter shall serve to outlline all of my parental concerns regarding my son's Individual Education Plan. 1. He has extreme anxiety 2. Inadequate progress in improving his math skills 3. Inadequate progress in improving his social skills with his peers. Just list out all of the goals from his last year's IEP and complain that there has been inadequate progress. It is the goal of the IEP to improve his skills, if the skills are not significantly better then the education plan to address them must change. There needs to be a program to improve his social skills with peers at lunch, just like he needs a special program toi mprove his math skills it is not just going to happen. If they balk, then you should calmly start discussing how to see other placements that would provide

the necessary programs to improve these skills. If the current placement is not successful, then they need to move him to a more restrictive environment that can provide the necessary educational plan to teach him the skills. Just keep thinking like that during the entire IEP. What is his deficit? what should the program be to teach him the skill? Can this school provide the appropriate education? Should he move to another placement? If they want to save money and not move him, they might wake up a little and approve extra help. Tell the case manager that you want your evaluation you paid for to be included under Parental concerns in the IEP. It has NOTHING to do with the triannual evaluation in future years. The one comment I have to make is "how far are you willing to go to get the right program for your

son?" You have to search your soul but if you have everything documented in writng and they still refuse, you will have to go to mediation or due process to get what he needs and that means an advocate or lawyer. You should document everything as well as possible and see wht happens. I think you only have 10 days to respond to dispute the IEP. From: MICHELLE STRAUSS <mandmstrauss >Reply-Mosaic-List To: Mosaic-List Subject: Re: (MOSAIC) IEP TomorrowDate: Tue, 3 Jun 2008 12:34:35 -0700 (PDT) Just one more note to that..... it always seems to work

against us, and I don't know you of course, someone advised me long ago to try not to be the "emontional parent" at these meetings. I was told it does not help to cry, etc. I don't know if that rings true or not. It also sounds like having an agenda infront of you is a good idea that way you have everything clear and in front of you. These teachers and case managers have no clue about the social end of the spectrum. It is such a heart breaking issue. Unless it is experienced first hand no oneone cares. There is no "report card" for social skills that's why it does not count.edv <archeo_one2001 > wrote: Hi, You can prepare a "parent agenda" to highlight the points you would like to discuss at your IEP meeting tomorrow. Your email to MOSAIC is already a great start to an outline for an agenda. Bring the agenda to your IEP meeting tomorow - have copies for each person in attendance. Make notes next to each point on your copy so you can clearly offer reasons for your request. If they refuse to accomodate your requests, ask them to put the reason "why" they can't accomodate it in writing. I have a son with Aspergers. He is in 6th grade and has had a one-on-one aide since Grade 1. His current IEP will allow him to have an aide through 7th grade. If the CM works with the aide or if you can do so, she can find ways to be "unobstrusive" and give him the independence if/when he needs it. Make some copies of what characteristics of Aspergers Syndrome are (go to the ASPEN NJ

website they have great resources) and give the classroom teacher and all those attending (and Case Manager if you deem appropriate) a copy as well. Their comments about your child "outgrowing" certain behaviors are based on ignorance of the diagnosis You do not have to sign the IEP at the meeting - take home a draft copy, mark up what you feel is not satisfactory and you can write a letter with your comments, be sure to respond within 14 days and send copies to the case manager and District Supervisor of Special Services. If you want any more info, you can email me privately archeo_one2001 Good Luck!> Hi Everyone,> > I am hoping someone can help me at the last minute> as I am preparing for my IEP tomorrow.> > My son is a 9 year old with Aspergers (severe> attention issues, sensory issues) who is

currently> mainstreamed with in class support for math and an> aide that is shared. My son has had major> difficulties this year not only with academics> (math), but socially more than anything. The school> provides a social skills group during speech and a> social worker comes during recess twice a week to> run a social skills group (she has been putting them> in a room to watch Underdog). This has not been> enough. He does not have any friends and none of> the children want to sit near him at lunch or be> around him. He is isolated. He has told us that he> cannot wait for school to end so that he does not> have to be around these "mean people". Due to the> anxiety associated with all of this, he has been> seeing a therapist for about 9 months now. I have> spoken repeatedly with the teacher and case manager> but they do not feel it is a serious issue.

The> teacher believes that we need to give> him time and eventually some of his behaviors (off> topic conversation, personal space etc.) will> improve. I completely disagree. I have requested> an aide during lunch as well as more communication> between the speech therapist, social worker and> psychologist. The teacher believes that an aide> will make him stand out. That is a moot point, he> already stands out. I get frustrated because I am> told things are fine and then I find out about> things that the other children do to my son and> obviously things are not fine. Does anyone have any> other suggestions? I have suggested a lunch bunch,> a buddy. I have asked for disabilities awareness> for his class, but have not made progress.> > In addition to the social problem, he has been> struggling with math. He went from the resource> room to in

class support, but still does not know> simple addition and subtraction facts. I have asked> for supplemental support or for him to go back to> the resource room. They do not agree. My son has> barely kept up only because we work with him at home> everyday and he has a tutor who works with him twice> a week. He needs more support than he is currently> receiving.> > We just had a neuropsychological evaluation done> and gave it to our case manager to support our> requests. He informed me that if he takes my> reports the evaluation clock for the district to do> their evaluation starts again. Basically the> district would not have to do their own evaluation> next year. Complete nonsense.> > Can anyone give me any suggestions as to what else> and how I can convince my district to provide more> support?> > I apologize for the long

e-mail.> > Your help is greatly appreciated.> > Thanks,> Luz> >

[Guest guest]

Luz-

I just noticed in your post that your child is severely allergic to

peanuts, and my son is too. Do you find that that creates even more

social issues at school? My son was only dx with AS 2 weeks ago, so

I'm very new at all of this. At our school there is a " Peanut Free "

table at lunch. My son informed me that sometimes no one sits with

him. I almost cried when I heard this. I'm wondering if it is even

possible to have it in his IEP that he has at least one " lunch time

buddy. " My son has never been invited to play at another child's

house (he's 8 and in 2nd grade), even though we've had several

playdates at our house. I always thought that it was probably because

of the allergies, but I realize now that the AS is most likely the

real reason.

>

> > Hi Everyone,

> >

> > I am hoping someone can help me at the last minute

> > as I am preparing for my IEP tomorrow.

> >

> > My son is a 9 year old with Aspergers (severe

> > attention issues, sensory issues) who is currently

> > mainstreamed with in class support for math and an

> > aide that is shared. My son has had major

> > difficulties this year not only with academics

> > (math), but socially more than anything. The school

> > provides a social skills group during speech and a

> > social worker comes during recess twice a week to

> > run a social skills group (she has been putting them

> > in a room to watch Underdog). This has not been

> > enough. He does not have any friends and none of

> > the children want to sit near him at lunch or be

> > around him. He is isolated. He has told us that he

> > cannot wait for school to end so that he does not

> > have to be around these " mean people " . Due to the

> > anxiety associated with all of this, he has been

> > seeing a therapist for about 9 months now. I have

> > spoken repeatedly with the teacher and case manager

> > but they do not feel it is a serious issue. The

> > teacher believes that we need to give

> > him time and eventually some of his behaviors (off

> > topic conversation, personal space etc.) will

> > improve. I completely disagree. I have requested

> > an aide during lunch as well as more communication

> > between the speech therapist, social worker and

> > psychologist. The teacher believes that an aide

> > will make him stand out. That is a moot point, he

> > already stands out. I get frustrated because I am

> > told things are fine and then I find out about

> > things that the other children do to my son and

> > obviously things are not fine. Does anyone have any

> > other suggestions? I have suggested a lunch bunch,

> > a buddy. I have asked for disabilities awareness

> > for his class, but have not made progress.

> >

> > In addition to the social problem, he has been

> > struggling with math. He went from the resource

> > room to in class support, but still does not know

> > simple addition and subtraction facts. I have asked

> > for supplemental support or for him to go back to

> > the resource room. They do not agree. My son has

> > barely kept up only because we work with him at home

> > everyday and he has a tutor who works with him twice

> > a week. He needs more support than he is currently

> > receiving.

> >

> > We just had a neuropsychological evaluation done

> > and gave it to our case manager to support our

> > requests. He informed me that if he takes my

> > reports the evaluation clock for the district to do

> > their evaluation starts again. Basically the

> > district would not have to do their own evaluation

> > next year. Complete nonsense.

> >

> > Can anyone give me any suggestions as to what else

> > and how I can convince my district to provide more

> > support?

> >

> > I apologize for the long e-mail.

> >

> > Your help is greatly appreciated.

> >

> > Thanks,

> > Luz

> >

> >

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Sounds very, very familiar. But, sounds like you at least got some things; that was more than we ever got, and that is why we home school now. The school just does NOT want to provide or pay out for services, etc. It is horrible but the truth, and something has to change; we should NOT have to be constantly fighting the school to meet our children's needs and / or recognize ASPERGERS as a very debilitating / social / learning disability that needs to HAVE accommodations for it. And, lunch alone may set your child off! I would just be dying to go if I was being bullied every single day; and, to have peanut butter put in his face with an allergy, YOU NEED TO CONTACT THE BOARD, etc., and let them know; that just simply is unacceptable, dangerous, and could be life threatening. You child SHOULD have different lunch plans and / or an aide to eat with him daily!! That is just my two cents, but I have many more cents to go but will draw it there......................Ruthie

luzadrianna1970@...; Mosaic-List ; Aspergers Treatment ; njfamilieswautism From: luzadrianna1970@...Date: Thu, 5 Jun 2008 10:56:33 -0700Subject: ( ) Re: (MOSAIC) IEP Tomorrow

Hi Everyone,

Thanks again for all your comments, I appreciate it.

My IEP lasted 3 hours and unfortunately we could not come to any agreement. We had requested that my son receive more than in class support for math and we were told that the options were in class support or the resource room, but that he is too high functioning for the resource room. We reminded the case manager that this is an individualized plan and that we need to find what is best for my son not simply what is out there. The case manager was adamant. The teacher stated that she thought in class support was best for him, but that if we as parents felt it wasn't right then he should listen to us. She told him that he should not create a point of contention between us and the teachers, but he did not care. We gave them our neuropsychological reports supporting our points, but he disregarded them.

As far as our social skills are concerned, the social worker that they had brought in from the outside did not think it would be a good idea for him to have an aide during lunch. She stated that she observes him and that he was fine. I then asked why my son had no friends, had never been asked on a play date in 2 years nor invited anywhere by anyone, but they could not answer. I then explained the situations my son relays about children putting peanut butter in his face (he is severely allergic) so that he does not sit with them, but nothing was said. They stress that I need to give him time and in time these skills will come. Time does not cure Aspergers.

I am frustrated but not deterred. I have an ally in the teacher and will be meeting alone with her to discuss other solutions.

Sorry for the long e-mail, but I wanted to let everyone know how it went.

Thanks again,

Luzluz velez <luzadrianna1970 > wrote:

All of my correspondence has been in written form and thus documenting my concerns.

Thanks.elevatordance <elevatordancemsn> wrote:

If its not in writing, it didn't happen. Have all of your requests you described in your email been in writing? If not, start there.

Dear Case managers name,

this letter shall serve to outlline all of my parental concerns regarding my son's Individual Education Plan.

1. He has extreme anxiety

2. Inadequate progress in improving his math skills

3. Inadequate progress in improving his social skills with his peers.

Just list out all of the goals from his last year's IEP and complain that there has been inadequate progress. It is the goal of the IEP to improve his skills, if the skills are not significantly better then the education plan to address them must change. There needs to be a program to improve his social skills with peers at lunch, just like he needs a special program toi mprove his math skills it is not just going to happen. If they balk, then you should calmly start discussing how to see other placements that would provide the necessary programs to improve these skills. If the current placement is not successful, then they need to move him to a more restrictive environment that can provide the necessary educational plan to teach him the skills. Just keep thinking like that during the entire IEP.

What is his deficit?

what should the program be to teach him the skill?

Can this school provide the appropriate education?

Should he move to another placement?

If they want to save money and not move him, they might wake up a little and approve extra help.

Tell the case manager that you want your evaluation you paid for to be included under Parental concerns in the IEP. It has NOTHING to do with the triannual evaluation in future years.

The one comment I have to make is "how far are you willing to go to get the right program for your son?" You have to search your soul but if you have everything documented in writng and they still refuse, you will have to go to mediation or due process to get what he needs and that means an advocate or lawyer. You should document everything as well as possible and see wht happens.

I think you only have 10 days to respond to dispute the IEP.

From: MICHELLE STRAUSS <mandmstrauss >Reply-Mosaic-List To: Mosaic-List Subject: Re: (MOSAIC) IEP TomorrowDate: Tue, 3 Jun 2008 12:34:35 -0700 (PDT)

Just one more note to that..... it always seems to work against us, and I don't know you of course, someone advised me long ago to try not to be the "emontional parent" at these meetings. I was told it does not help to cry, etc. I don't know if that rings true or not.

It also sounds like having an agenda infront of you is a good idea that way you have everything clear and in front of you.

These teachers and case managers have no clue about the social end of the spectrum. It is such a heart breaking issue. Unless it is experienced first hand no oneone cares. There is no "report card" for social skills that's why it does not count.edv <archeo_one2001 > wrote:

Hi,

You can prepare a "parent agenda" to highlight the points you would like to discuss at your IEP meeting tomorrow. Your email to MOSAIC is already a great start to an outline for an agenda. Bring the agenda to your IEP meeting tomorow - have copies for each person in attendance. Make notes next to each point on your copy so you can clearly offer reasons for your request. If they refuse to accomodate your requests, ask them to put the reason "why" they can't accomodate it in writing.

I have a son with Aspergers. He is in 6th grade and has had a one-on-one aide since Grade 1. His current IEP will allow him to have an aide through 7th grade. If the CM works with the aide or if you can do so, she can find ways to be "unobstrusive" and give him the independence if/when he needs it. Make some copies of what characteristics of Aspergers Syndrome are (go to the ASPEN NJ website they have great resources) and give the classroom teacher and all those attending (and Case Manager if you deem appropriate) a copy as well. Their comments about your child "outgrowing" certain behaviors are based on ignorance of the diagnosis

You do not have to sign the IEP at the meeting - take home a draft copy, mark up what you feel is not satisfactory and you can write a letter with your comments, be sure to respond within 14 days and send copies to the case manager and District Supervisor of Special Services.

If you want any more info, you can email me privately archeo_one2001

Good Luck!> Hi Everyone,> > I am hoping someone can help me at the last minute> as I am preparing for my IEP tomorrow.> > My son is a 9 year old with Aspergers (severe> attention issues, sensory issues) who is currently> mainstreamed with in class support for math and an> aide that is shared. My son has had major> difficulties this year not only with academics> (math), but socially more than anything. The school> provides a social skills group during speech and a> social worker comes during recess twice a week to> run a social skills group (she has been putting them> in a room to watch Underdog). This has not been> enough. He does not have any friends and none of> the children want to sit near him at lunch or be> around him. He is isolated. He has told us that he> cannot wait for school to end so that he does not> have to be around these "mean people". Due to the> anxiety associated with all of this, he has been> seeing a therapist for about 9 months now. I have> spoken repeatedly with the teacher and case manager> but they do not feel it is a serious issue. The> teacher believes that we need to give> him time and eventually some of his behaviors (off> topic conversation, personal space etc.) will> improve. I completely disagree. I have requested> an aide during lunch as well as more communication> between the speech therapist, social worker and> psychologist. The teacher believes that an aide> will make him stand out. That is a moot point, he> already stands out. I get frustrated because I am> told things are fine and then I find out about> things that the other children do to my son and> obviously things are not fine. Does anyone have any> other suggestions? I have suggested a lunch bunch,> a buddy. I have asked for disabilities awareness> for his class, but have not made progress.> > In addition to the social problem, he has been> struggling with math. He went from the resource> room to in class support, but still does not know> simple addition and subtraction facts. I have asked> for supplemental support or for him to go back to> the resource room. They do not agree. My son has> barely kept up only because we work with him at home> everyday and he has a tutor who works with him twice> a week. He needs more support than he is currently> receiving.> > We just had a neuropsychological evaluation done> and gave it to our case manager to support our> requests. He informed me that if he takes my> reports the evaluation clock for the district to do> their evaluation starts again. Basically the> district would not have to do their own evaluation> next year. Complete nonsense.> > Can anyone give me any suggestions as to what else> and how I can convince my district to provide more> support?> > I apologize for the long e-mail.> > Your help is greatly appreciated.> > Thanks,> Luz> >

[Guest guest]

Wow, well I'm so glad the teacher is on your side! And I think you

made some good points to the case manager.

As to observation during lunch: HA! They did that to my son. Just

observed at lunch and during classes. " Observing " isn't enough.

They need to hear/listen what is being said. That was my first

thought when it was mentioned my son was seen talking to

others: " Well, did they hear what was coming out of his mouth?? "

Meaning a lot of times what he says is so... " off " or " untypical " or

uncool...in that the other kids want to just roll their eyes, so to

speak, and ignore him. Oh, and he participated in class well. Plus,

maybe the observers should try to have a conversation with them.

Observation can help but it isn't enough for a decision to be based

on.

Regarding math, are they going to test him for a learning disability

or can they explain why he isn't learning it? He needs some stronger

supports/teaching in this area and defining if he has an LD in the

math area will help (at least I think so).

OK - you can do a follow-up letter. Thank them for meeting and then

sort of clarify/state what was said/decided on. When you disagree

with either, state why; state CM's or other's point of view and state

your's, etc. And you can end it with something like the letter

summarizes the meeting for you, let you know if they disagree with

any points. AND THEN this gives you some paperwork to fall back on

for if/when you go over the case manager's or the school's head to

the school " system " special ed director.

Quick thoughts, and keep us informed!!

-- In , luz velez

<luzadrianna1970@...> wrote:

>

> Hi Everyone,

>

> Thanks again for all your comments, I appreciate it.

>

> My IEP lasted 3 hours and unfortunately we could not come to any

agreement. We had requested that my son receive more than in class

support for math and we were told that the options were in class

support or the resource room, but that he is too high functioning for

the resource room. We reminded the case manager that this is an

[Guest guest]

>

> Hi Everyone,

>

> Thanks again for all your comments, I appreciate it.

>

> My IEP lasted 3 hours and unfortunately we could not come to any

agreement. We had requested that my son receive more than in class

support for math and we were told that the options were in class

support or the resource room, but that he is too high functioning for

the resource room. We reminded the case manager that this is an

individualized plan and that we need to find what is best for my son

not simply what is out there. The case manager was adamant. The

teacher stated that she thought in class support was best for him, but

that if we as parents felt it wasn't right then he should listen to

us. She told him that he should not create a point of contention

between us and the teachers, but he did not care. We gave them our

neuropsychological reports supporting our points, but he disregarded them.

>

> As far as our social skills are concerned, the social worker that

they had brought in from the outside did not think it would be a good

idea for him to have an aide during lunch. She stated that she

observes him and that he was fine. I then asked why my son had no

friends, had never been asked on a play date in 2 years nor invited

anywhere by anyone, but they could not answer. I then explained the

situations my son relays about children putting peanut butter in his

face (he is severely allergic) so that he does not sit with them, but

nothing was said. They stress that I need to give him time and in

time these skills will come. Time does not cure Aspergers.

>

> I am frustrated but not deterred. I have an ally in the teacher

and will be meeting alone with her to discuss other solutions.

>

> Sorry for the long e-mail, but I wanted to let everyone know how

it went.

>

> Thanks again,

> Luz

>

>

So sorry it didn't go well. That peanut butter thing is dangerous and

he should have an adult with him to protect him from other kids. My

nephew can't even touch peanut products without a reaction. Do you

have an epi-pen at school just in case he has a reaction that affects

his breathing? My son has a latex allergy and I'm going to ask for a

504 plan (I think that's what the accomodation is called) to ask the

school to go latex-free for all of their gloves, band-aids, no

balloons allowed, etc. The latex dust caused him to have a pretty bad

reaction once and the allergist said he is at risk for anaphylaxis.

I know a little girl w/ADHD, memory problems and speech delay who has

had state services since she was 2 y.o. Our school will pass her even

though she hasn't retained anything she has learned from 1st grade,

has few friends, has melt-downs at school. After an IEE, the school

apologized and said that they don't have anything to offer other than

the learning center support that she is already getting, and that

independent study was the best option. How is that supposed to be the

least restrictive environment? She can't even get a one-to-one

paraprofessional for school because there is already an aid in the

room. So my friend is starting to homeschool her oldest, while her

youngest is about to start kindergarten. Just when she thought she

could get a little time to herself.... And what should a working

parent do? Arggggg!

Why don't the schools get it?

[Guest guest]

When you asked " why don't the schools get it ". SOME, do get it. but they save it for the parents that are strong advocates, know their rights, and have enough money to spend on an attorney and doctors to support them at their IEP meetings. they save on their budgets with parents like me who don't have all this, and say : {we don't see it}. but I was persistent and wasn't giving up and had our doctors support for many years. I'm still learning !. Now, there are some schools that " just don't get it ". really don't get it. they think it's the parents - lack of parenting skills - just punish the child or just wait , and he'll/she'll be just fine. In that type of school with those strong head individuals, and us parents fighting, expenses on lawyers and doctors and the school still

doesn't agree. (I've been there) the child loses out !. big time. there is a point where you (parent) know, no matter what you do or say or how many doctors you get to explain your situation. the school isn't going to budge. at that point is where we (the parent) have to make a decision on " what's best for you child ". when I was in that situation, and reached my final point with that one school. I searched around for what I felt were the better schools and eliminate the ones that didn't work well with special needs children. then, I went to each school in person and spoke to the CSE team and administration. I wanted to know how much they know about autism. I also explained that I have a child with autism. spoke to them about my concerns and see what they had to offer. then I made my decision and moved. Which was very

hard for me too. (tight budget to the penny) But it was so worth it. Some others on this site had to do the same. (It's not easy) some decided to homeschool, they asked lots of questions and didn't think they could do it. they learned & some will tell you it worked out so well, they wish they did it sooner !. When the school and you can't come to a agreement, don't panic. If you exhausted everything, documented everything, and now you feel you child is feeling it....(losing out)......It's time for a change...start checking out all kinds of options. Like homeschooling, computer schools, hiring a tutor/retired teacher to homeschool, and even moving to another school district after you did your interviews with the staff. Or, if you feel it's worth the fight to keep your child in that school. Get a good attorney, an IEP advocate, good doctors that specialize in autism to support you, stay

strong, and keep educating youself with the school system to stay untop of everything. also, join an autism support group in your area to hear what others have done that can maybe work for you. Good Luck Rose kellypywtorak <kellypywtorak@...> wrote: >> Hi Everyone,> > Thanks again for all your comments, I appreciate it.> > My IEP lasted 3 hours and unfortunately we could not come to anyagreement. We had requested that my son receive more than in classsupport for math and we were told that the options were in classsupport or the resource room, but that he is too high functioning forthe resource room. We reminded the case manager that this is anindividualized plan and that we need to find what is best for my sonnot simply what is out there. The case manager was adamant. Theteacher stated that she thought in class support was best for him, butthat if we as parents felt it wasn't right then he should listen tous. She told him that he should not create a point of contentionbetween us and the teachers, but he did not care. We gave them ourneuropsychological reports supporting our points, but he disregarded them.> > As

far as our social skills are concerned, the social worker thatthey had brought in from the outside did not think it would be a goodidea for him to have an aide during lunch. She stated that sheobserves him and that he was fine. I then asked why my son had nofriends, had never been asked on a play date in 2 years nor invitedanywhere by anyone, but they could not answer. I then explained thesituations my son relays about children putting peanut butter in hisface (he is severely allergic) so that he does not sit with them, butnothing was said. They stress that I need to give him time and intime these skills will come. Time does not cure Aspergers.> > I am frustrated but not deterred. I have an ally in the teacherand will be meeting alone with her to discuss other solutions.> > Sorry for the long e-mail, but I wanted to let everyone know howit went.> > Thanks again,> Luz>

>So sorry it didn't go well. That peanut butter thing is dangerous andhe should have an adult with him to protect him from other kids. Mynephew can't even touch peanut products without a reaction. Do youhave an epi-pen at school just in case he has a reaction that affectshis breathing? My son has a latex allergy and I'm going to ask for a504 plan (I think that's what the accomodation is called) to ask theschool to go latex-free for all of their gloves, band-aids, noballoons allowed, etc. The latex dust caused him to have a pretty badreaction once and the allergist said he is at risk for anaphylaxis.I know a little girl w/ADHD, memory problems and speech delay who hashad state services since she was 2 y.o. Our school will pass her eventhough she hasn't retained anything she has learned from 1st grade,has few friends, has melt-downs at school. After an IEE, the schoolapologized and said that they don't

have anything to offer other thanthe learning center support that she is already getting, and thatindependent study was the best option. How is that supposed to be theleast restrictive environment? She can't even get a one-to-oneparaprofessional for school because there is already an aid in theroom. So my friend is starting to homeschool her oldest, while heryoungest is about to start kindergarten. Just when she thought shecould get a little time to herself.... And what should a workingparent do? Arggggg!Why don't the schools get it?