Guest guest Posted May 29, 2008 Report Share Posted May 29, 2008 Yes, , we are involved with a home school assistance program; it provides our 'teacher' to ensure we ARE doing what we SAID we would AND we have a home -school base / library, materials, book orders (scholastic), etc. We do field trips, can go to the local Y for swimming and basketball, a home school basketball team, choir, band, and enrichment classes. We can even have our youth take Spanish, etc., and be taught once a week for a short time, by a teacher (certified)----it is great, great, great; we have made quite a few friends through this, too. So, I would check in to it. RUTHIE DOLEZAL From: w_wittmayer@...Date: Thu, 29 May 2008 09:26:43 -0700Subject: Re: ( ) New Topic - In need of reassurance or advice Thank , Honestly, I am so scared I will do something to cause him to regress. It's just a fear. Making changes in his life is a scary thing. HOWEVER..........what happened at his school scares me more. Ruth has convinced me to at least take a look into Ga. homeschooling. I need to talk with a social worker for autism and an advocate locally. Wallbank - Wittmayer DOK Grace Chapter "Prayer without work is empty words,service without prayer is labor lost." Re: ( ) New Topic - In need of reassurance or advice ,I have 2 sisters-in-law who homeschool and they are both on oppositecoasts, but are very active in homeschool groups or associations wherethey go on regular field trips. I know these groups are all over thecountry with the surge in families who homeschool. They also go togymnastics, swim team, dance or karate--something like PE but not ateam sport. They are both very active in their churches so there issocialization with the kids from that. None of their kids havediagnoses, but I do suspect that the 3 oldest probably havesomething--ADHD or an ASD. The dad of the 3 oldest is such anundiagnosed Aspie, and we know it runs in families. Anyway, justletting you know there are hopes for social outlets withhomeschooling. If school doesn't go well, it's in the back of mymind. Of course, we'd have to move to an affordable state, not CA!!!> > > My son did well during the 2nd grade school year. He began to becomeobsessed with a little friend named Hannah. He would get angry whenshe spoke to other boys. He would get angry if she didn't say hello tohim. The relationship became very black and white as the yearprogressed. Hannah has done her best to be a friend to my son. 2 weeksago my son got into the car and the VP told me that he had bruises onhis face. That he had hit himself because he couldn't sit next toHannah. I asked why did they not call me immediately? She said thebruises did not appear until school was almost out. YET......theyfound my son in the cafeteria laying in a fetal position, violentlyslapping himself across the face. All the kids in the lunchroom werestanding on chairs to see what was happening. Hannah believed my sonwas having a heart attack. It scared her so much. No one called totell me this had happened. Not one call. My son had a bruise that tookup the whole> left side of his face and a large area behind his ear. You betterbelieve if he had come into school with bruises like that...they wouldhave called DFACS. When I questioned them further, they acted as if itwas nothing. Teachers were writing letters to Hannah's mother (who Iam friends with), Hannah's teacher was calling her. Hannah'steacher was going to my son's teacher and talking. Hannah's mother waswriting letters to both Principals and to teachers. I wrote letters tothe Principals and my son's teacher. They all called Hannah's motherback. Did I get a phone call? NOPE. I wrote a letter to the leadteacher for Special Education. I was firm and stated that she wouldchange his IEP before the school year ends. She would have a solution.The only relief in all this is that she did call me back. She didchange his IEP to take him out of the main classroom and into theInclusion/Co- Teaching classroom. He will have a normal 3rd gradeteacher and> a special ed. teacher all day.> > He came home upset over Hannah again Monday of this week. (Last weekof school) I decided to keep him home the rest of the week to removethe stresses of seeing Hannah. The obsession needs to be undercontrol. Out of sight, out of mind. The last 2 days he has not saidanything about Hannah or other boys that talk to her. I took him toschool to pick up his things. They refused to let me go back with him.Saying we would disrupt the class. Which I guess I can understand.But, it was their time for recess. They told me he could not saygoodbye to his friends under the circumstances. I was not yelling. Inever made a scene. Never said anything out of line. I did say that Ifelt they were not doing all they could to help in this finalweek of school. We would see them next year. The VP gave me a nastylook and walked away.> > It was the first time I have really been so hurt and felt sobetrayed by the school. I always felt they should have tested himearlier. He should not have been in SST for that long. They finallydid the testing as he went into second grade. Done at my insistance.I came armed with ALL his medical records. He did qualify for specialservices for Autistic children. We have been supportive of theirrecommendations. But...... . My son coming home from a melt down likethat, with a huge bruise on his face, was so shocking to me. Shouldn'tthey call to tell me my son was found in the cafeteria in a fetalposition slapping himself? They acted as if it was nothing. I came toquestion the teachers the next day. The VP spoke with me. Again, theyacted as if I was nuts. Like they could not understand what I wasupset about. I'm more upset than I have ever been with the school. Ihave kept my mouth shut for 4 years. Been cooperative. Then they treatmy family> this way. Gave a ton of support to Hannah's family.....as well theyshould have. NO support for my son or myself. I am absolutely furious.I really wonder now if he is safe at school. Those bruises don't showup like they did by one or two slaps to the face. He had been hittinghis face HARD for a while before anyone got to him.> > For anyone who read through this.....thanks. Thanks for letting mevent. I just don't know what to do. Not sure if I am wrong and need togive them a break. Or, if I am right. They did not protect my son. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 30, 2008 Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 Mina, I can't speak for everyone at all. But, I am sure many have felt that feeling of being lost, and confused as to what do we do next. I know that feeling of being alone trying your best to raise a child with AS. Since this incident in the cafeteria I am pulling together a support team. He is going to see his Autism psychologist & child psychiatrist. He will also attend 4 sessions on "How Does Your Engine Run." HDYER hopefully will help to be able to calm himself down. I have called an IEP Advocate from the state of GA. I'm also pulling in a social worker from Children's Healthare of ATL. Use your resources! Every resource. I haven't done that and regret it. Having the resources of people who understand AS will bring a lot of peace to you. Wallbank - Wittmayer DOK Grace Chapter "Prayer without work is empty words,service without prayer is labor lost." Re: ( ) New Topic - In need of reassurance or advice , Your husband sounds a lot like mine. Except I'm in the total beginning of this whole thing with 4 children, all under 6, with 2 of them suspected to be HFA. I'm so feeling like I have NO help in figuring this whole thing out, and DH is leaving it all up to me to figure out and then tell him what I came up with. DH doesn't help parent much...he does fun stuff with the kids, and if it's not fun, he doesn't want anything to do with it if he can help it. Oh, but when things are going on with the kids he has LOTS of suggestions of things *I* could do to change things. I'm glad I've got this group, as well as a few people in my community to help out with this whole thing, because I'm feeling somewhat lost in what we do next, as we're now in the waiting period to get in and be seen, which is probably going to be a LONG wait. So I feel like the boys should be doing SOMETHING through the summer to keep on track instead of just stagnating over the summer, but I don't know what. Ugh. It hurts my head to think about it... Mina Mina Smolinski Mommy to: 9/25/02 5/13/04 Owen 7/1/05 Lila 3/3/07 On May 28, 2008, at 8:02 PM, Wallbank wrote: Thank you so much Ruthie. Great advice. is in individual OT and he is in group OT. He has had several OT evals. He does see a pediatric psychiatrist and an autism specialist. He has been to floortime therapy. Everyone has said he doesn't need speech other than pragmatics. His hearing and sight have been tested. We do need to take him to see a Neurologist. We also need to find a really good socialization group. I had him in socialization therapy for a while and it wasn't specific for AS. I am meeting with a social worker from Children's Healthcare. His father takes him out to places and spends time with him. But, I am raising this child pretty much on my own. My husband is clueless. He does not deal with the schools, IEP's, Dr.'s....he is a playmate. My husband is no source of support. So, I really need the social worker to help me with local social groups, possible school changes or homeschooling options, support of some kind. I'll know more after seeing her. He also sees the autism Dr. this month and the ped. Psychiatrist. I also found a Autism advocate. She has to return my call. I have heard great things about her though. Wallbank - Wittmayer DOK Grace Chapter "Prayer without work is empty words,service without prayer is labor lost." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 31, 2008 Report Share Posted May 31, 2008 The social myth is prevalent and narrow minded really: I say that to myself (and others I guess) but I Can say it 'CUZ i USED TO POSSESS IT MYSELF!!! Now I homeschool one, public school 2; I am disliking public school more and more though!! How many of you sit at home all day, knitting, weaving, and sitting on your rumps doing nothing? I know that sounds ridiculous, and it is. Are you ever in your yard? Does someone drive by and wave, stop and say HI, maybe even talk to you, your child, etc.? That is SOCIALIZATION. We grocery shop, eat out, go to the mall, walk outside or anywhere else, go to sporting events, church activities, etc. THESE ARE ALL SOCIALIZING, dealing with the public, getting out; you do it all day long every single day. Answer the door...home, have your child do it, make good eye contact, etc. Practice. We do!! We DO practice. But, point is, my son is in the yard playing ball with four neighbor kids right now; they seem to come here, but he is playing wonderfully with them; I am butting out; he is doing great, and this is social. He is in public school but that does not matter; my 14 year old homeschooler does the same but IS on a baseball and basketball team (which requires a lot of social stuff---including playing in public)........so, that is a ridiculous myth; besides, many of our kids struggle at school due to all the noises, environment, and get about 1-2 hours max a day out of the school learning itself; shocking, isn't it?? It IS true though as they are bothered by everything around them, colors, lighting, etc. At home, it IS what they want, where they want, etc. If you want to do it, work full time or not, YOU CAN DO IT!!! I know, as I do.........and I work about 60-80 a week as a registered daycare provider, IN MY HOME but I do have to work (I cannot just drop it for my own children all the time----------I am here and available but I AM STILL WORKING!!!!). Ruthie From: kellypywtorak@...Date: Thu, 29 May 2008 05:29:24 +0000Subject: Re: ( ) New Topic - In need of reassurance or advice ,I have 2 sisters-in-law who homeschool and they are both on oppositecoasts, but are very active in homeschool groups or associations wherethey go on regular field trips. I know these groups are all over thecountry with the surge in families who homeschool. They also go togymnastics, swim team, dance or karate--something like PE but not ateam sport. They are both very active in their churches so there issocialization with the kids from that. None of their kids havediagnoses, but I do suspect that the 3 oldest probably havesomething--ADHD or an ASD. The dad of the 3 oldest is such anundiagnosed Aspie, and we know it runs in families. Anyway, justletting you know there are hopes for social outlets withhomeschooling. If school doesn't go well, it's in the back of mymind. Of course, we'd have to move to an affordable state, not CA!!!> > > My son did well during the 2nd grade school year. He began to becomeobsessed with a little friend named Hannah. He would get angry whenshe spoke to other boys. He would get angry if she didn't say hello tohim. The relationship became very black and white as the yearprogressed. Hannah has done her best to be a friend to my son. 2 weeksago my son got into the car and the VP told me that he had bruises onhis face. That he had hit himself because he couldn't sit next toHannah. I asked why did they not call me immediately? She said thebruises did not appear until school was almost out. YET......theyfound my son in the cafeteria laying in a fetal position, violentlyslapping himself across the face. All the kids in the lunchroom werestanding on chairs to see what was happening. Hannah believed my sonwas having a heart attack. It scared her so much. No one called totell me this had happened. Not one call. My son had a bruise that tookup the whole> left side of his face and a large area behind his ear. You betterbelieve if he had come into school with bruises like that...they wouldhave called DFACS. When I questioned them further, they acted as if itwas nothing. Teachers were writing letters to Hannah's mother (who Iam friends with), Hannah's teacher was calling her. Hannah'steacher was going to my son's teacher and talking. Hannah's mother waswriting letters to both Principals and to teachers. I wrote letters tothe Principals and my son's teacher. They all called Hannah's motherback. Did I get a phone call? NOPE. I wrote a letter to the leadteacher for Special Education. I was firm and stated that she wouldchange his IEP before the school year ends. She would have a solution.The only relief in all this is that she did call me back. She didchange his IEP to take him out of the main classroom and into theInclusion/Co- Teaching classroom. He will have a normal 3rd gradeteacher and> a special ed. teacher all day.> > He came home upset over Hannah again Monday of this week. (Last weekof school) I decided to keep him home the rest of the week to removethe stresses of seeing Hannah. The obsession needs to be undercontrol. Out of sight, out of mind. The last 2 days he has not saidanything about Hannah or other boys that talk to her. I took him toschool to pick up his things. They refused to let me go back with him.Saying we would disrupt the class. Which I guess I can understand.But, it was their time for recess. They told me he could not saygoodbye to his friends under the circumstances. I was not yelling. Inever made a scene. Never said anything out of line. I did say that Ifelt they were not doing all they could to help in this finalweek of school. We would see them next year. The VP gave me a nastylook and walked away.> > It was the first time I have really been so hurt and felt sobetrayed by the school. I always felt they should have tested himearlier. He should not have been in SST for that long. They finallydid the testing as he went into second grade. Done at my insistance.I came armed with ALL his medical records. He did qualify for specialservices for Autistic children. We have been supportive of theirrecommendations. But...... . My son coming home from a melt down likethat, with a huge bruise on his face, was so shocking to me. Shouldn'tthey call to tell me my son was found in the cafeteria in a fetalposition slapping himself? They acted as if it was nothing. I came toquestion the teachers the next day. The VP spoke with me. Again, theyacted as if I was nuts. Like they could not understand what I wasupset about. I'm more upset than I have ever been with the school. Ihave kept my mouth shut for 4 years. Been cooperative. Then they treatmy family> this way. Gave a ton of support to Hannah's family.....as well theyshould have. NO support for my son or myself. I am absolutely furious.I really wonder now if he is safe at school. Those bruises don't showup like they did by one or two slaps to the face. He had been hittinghis face HARD for a while before anyone got to him.> > For anyone who read through this.....thanks. Thanks for letting mevent. I just don't know what to do. Not sure if I am wrong and need togive them a break. Or, if I am right. They did not protect my son. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 31, 2008 Report Share Posted May 31, 2008 How do you get started in homeschooling?BRYAN DOLEZAL <DOLEZAL123@...> wrote: The social myth is prevalent and narrow minded really: I say that to myself (and others I guess) but I Can say it 'CUZ i USED TO POSSESS IT MYSELF!!! Now I homeschool one, public school 2; I am disliking public school more and more though!! How many of you sit at home all day, knitting, weaving, and sitting on your rumps doing nothing? I know that sounds ridiculous, and it is. Are you ever in your yard? Does someone drive by and wave, stop and say HI, maybe even talk to you, your child, etc.? That is SOCIALIZATION. We grocery shop, eat out, go to the mall, walk outside or anywhere else, go to sporting events, church activities, etc. THESE ARE ALL SOCIALIZING, dealing with the public, getting out; you do it all day long every single day. Answer the door...home, have your child do it, make good eye contact, etc. Practice. We do!! We DO practice. But, point is, my son is in the yard playing ball with four neighbor kids right now; they seem to come here, but he is playing wonderfully with them; I am butting out; he is doing great, and this is social. He is in public school but that does not matter; my 14 year old homeschooler does the same but IS on a baseball and basketball team (which requires a lot of social stuff---including playing in public)........so, that is a ridiculous myth; besides, many of our kids struggle at school due to all the noises, environment, and get about 1-2 hours max a day out of the school learning itself; shocking, isn't it?? It IS true though as they are bothered by everything around them, colors, lighting, etc. At home, it IS what they want, where they want, etc. If you want to do it, work full time or not, YOU CAN DO IT!!! I know, as I do.........and I work about 60-80 a week as a registered daycare provider, IN MY HOME but I do have to work (I cannot just drop it for my own children all the time----------I am here and available but I AM STILL WORKING!!!!). Ruthie From: kellypywtorak Date: Thu, 29 May 2008 05:29:24 +0000Subject: Re: ( ) New Topic - In need of reassurance or advice ,I have 2 sisters-in-law who homeschool and they are both on oppositecoasts, but are very active in homeschool groups or associations wherethey go on regular field trips. I know these groups are all over thecountry with the surge in families who homeschool. They also go togymnastics, swim team, dance or karate--something like PE but not ateam sport. They are both very active in their churches so there issocialization with the kids from that. None of their kids havediagnoses, but I do suspect that the 3 oldest probably havesomething--ADHD or an ASD. The dad of the 3 oldest is such anundiagnosed Aspie, and we know it runs in families. Anyway, justletting you know there are hopes for social outlets withhomeschooling. If school doesn't go well, it's in the back of mymind. Of course, we'd have to move to an affordable state, not CA!!!> > > My son did well during the 2nd grade school year. He began to becomeobsessed with a little friend named Hannah. He would get angry whenshe spoke to other boys. He would get angry if she didn't say hello tohim. The relationship became very black and white as the yearprogressed. Hannah has done her best to be a friend to my son. 2 weeksago my son got into the car and the VP told me that he had bruises onhis face. That he had hit himself because he couldn't sit next toHannah. I asked why did they not call me immediately? She said thebruises did not appear until school was almost out. YET......theyfound my son in the cafeteria laying in a fetal position, violentlyslapping himself across the face. All the kids in the lunchroom werestanding on chairs to see what was happening. Hannah believed my sonwas having a heart attack. It scared her so much. No one called totell me this had happened. Not one call. My son had a bruise that tookup the whole> left side of his face and a large area behind his ear. You betterbelieve if he had come into school with bruises like that...they wouldhave called DFACS. When I questioned them further, they acted as if itwas nothing. Teachers were writing letters to Hannah's mother (who Iam friends with), Hannah's teacher was calling her. Hannah'steacher was going to my son's teacher and talking. Hannah's mother waswriting letters to both Principals and to teachers. I wrote letters tothe Principals and my son's teacher. They all called Hannah's motherback. Did I get a phone call? NOPE. I wrote a letter to the leadteacher for Special Education. I was firm and stated that she wouldchange his IEP before the school year ends. She would have a solution.The only relief in all this is that she did call me back. She didchange his IEP to take him out of the main classroom and into theInclusion/Co- Teaching classroom. He will have a normal 3rd gradeteacher and> a special ed. teacher all day.> > He came home upset over Hannah again Monday of this week. (Last weekof school) I decided to keep him home the rest of the week to removethe stresses of seeing Hannah. The obsession needs to be undercontrol. Out of sight, out of mind. The last 2 days he has not saidanything about Hannah or other boys that talk to her. I took him toschool to pick up his things. They refused to let me go back with him.Saying we would disrupt the class. Which I guess I can understand.But, it was their time for recess. They told me he could not saygoodbye to his friends under the circumstances. I was not yelling. Inever made a scene. Never said anything out of line. I did say that Ifelt they were not doing all they could to help in this finalweek of school. We would see them next year. The VP gave me a nastylook and walked away.> > It was the first time I have really been so hurt and felt sobetrayed by the school. I always felt they should have tested himearlier. He should not have been in SST for that long. They finallydid the testing as he went into second grade. Done at my insistance.I came armed with ALL his medical records. He did qualify for specialservices for Autistic children. We have been supportive of theirrecommendations. But...... . My son coming home from a melt down likethat, with a huge bruise on his face, was so shocking to me. Shouldn'tthey call to tell me my son was found in the cafeteria in a fetalposition slapping himself? They acted as if it was nothing. I came toquestion the teachers the next day. The VP spoke with me. Again, theyacted as if I was nuts. Like they could not understand what I wasupset about. I'm more upset than I have ever been with the school. Ihave kept my mouth shut for 4 years. Been cooperative. Then they treatmy family> this way. Gave a ton of support to Hannah's family.....as well theyshould have. NO support for my son or myself. I am absolutely furious.I really wonder now if he is safe at school. Those bruises don't showup like they did by one or two slaps to the face. He had been hittinghis face HARD for a while before anyone got to him.> > For anyone who read through this.....thanks. Thanks for letting mevent. I just don't know what to do. Not sure if I am wrong and need togive them a break. Or, if I am right. They did not protect my son. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 31, 2008 Report Share Posted May 31, 2008 You must be newer?? I am glad to share again; my 8th grader, now 14 has his issues; over 10 diagnosis including diabetic (Type I for almost 6 years now), AS, ADHD, five learning disabilities, etc.; no matter what we have done, since we moved to the Cedar Rapids, IA area 4 years ago, they would NOT give him an IEP or a 504. We finally got and found an attorney to handle this, and after $10,000 and still nothing, threw in the towel, as our son was becoming suicidal, threatening it, etc. And, our school / his school building was literally about 1/4 a mile or less from the Interstate----one of the busiest in the entire State of Iowa---literally across the school lot, over the drive, through a huge ditch, and there it is. I could not take it another day and we had had four years of this; me getting him from school chronically because his sugar was 300 (which is NOT a crisis but to school EVERYTHING is, and any reason to send him home was a good day).......... Anyway, within 6 weeks, he was hospitalized twice in the psyche unit, and after the second time, and, being the researching professional, pain the rump, need answers NOW 'damnit' MOM, I woke my husband up about 5 a.m. one Saturday morning (yes, he still loves me---barely but I just woke up with this myself!!!)----------AND SAID, OH MY GOD, I KNOW WHAT IS WRONG WITH ANDREW---IT IS SOOOOO SCHOOL. -------------he said, oh my GOD I think you are right; so, we talked, and he never went back to the place; I started homeschooling that next week, and that was October 2007; he did excellent, and impressed us. We hate the public school we were in SOOOOO much, seriously, we packed up our things, bought a very, very nice home about 20 minutes north and now live in the same city our home school assistance program is in. We thought that would 'be the end of it' but it isn't. I just found out Friday that the guidance counselor whom had a large hand in ruining his (our lives too) life and friendships has been TOLD she will no longer be counseling and that I was to be informed by this person via grapevine (teacher from that school, etc.) so I would know that I did make a difference even though we never thought we would! So, that is one HURRAY!! Then, on top of that, my 7 year old was doing okay at the old school; he is actually doing amazing at the new one, and he has AS too. He has been treated better from day one. It is just amazing. And, my 5 year old NT was given a tour, introduced to his teacher, etc. when we took our now 7 year old to meet his teacher ahead of time, etc. So, that is HOW it came to be. I do have a math tutor for . She does ALL main math that means anything (more than taxes, bills, how much to pay at the store, money, etc.); and she brought him from a 4th to 8th grade reading level July to October and same with math from October to February!! So, I DO deligate that which I am insane to try as that would NOT be good for he nor I!!! I am seriously able to do the basics for math; and it was the school's fault about both, honestly. He came to that district having all his needs met, and stayed at the same levels we came to them at; that is HOW MUCH they failed him; April, tutor, is a testiment to how much 2 hours a week of one-on-one can do, and in such a short period of time. SHE HAS BEEN HIS AND MY ANGEL (she and I are actually amazing friends now---she has a best friend ten years older than she here, a guy friend (not her husband but their best friend together) best friend, and me; we do lunch, talk at least every other day now, etc. So, it has turned out amazing. I would do it all again........... My background: 133 hours in elem/spec ed and I viewed school as the building and all that was in it; I did everything but graduate; I burnt out; so, I have been in the classroom, etc. I had a very hard time changing my views on school and that home school would and could be okay. Am I glad I did. So, that is a very short version. Ruthie From: mom2two23@...Date: Sat, 31 May 2008 14:32:17 -0700Subject: RE: ( ) New Topic - In need of reassurance or advice How do you get started in homeschooling?BRYAN DOLEZAL <DOLEZAL123msn> wrote: The social myth is prevalent and narrow minded really: I say that to myself (and others I guess) but I Can say it 'CUZ i USED TO POSSESS IT MYSELF!!! Now I homeschool one, public school 2; I am disliking public school more and more though!! How many of you sit at home all day, knitting, weaving, and sitting on your rumps doing nothing? I know that sounds ridiculous, and it is. Are you ever in your yard? Does someone drive by and wave, stop and say HI, maybe even talk to you, your child, etc.? That is SOCIALIZATION. We grocery shop, eat out, go to the mall, walk outside or anywhere else, go to sporting events, church activities, etc. THESE ARE ALL SOCIALIZING, dealing with the public, getting out; you do it all day long every single day. Answer the door...home, have your child do it, make good eye contact, etc. Practice. We do!! We DO practice. But, point is, my son is in the yard playing ball with four neighbor kids right now; they seem to come here, but he is playing wonderfully with them; I am butting out; he is doing great, and this is social. He is in public school but that does not matter; my 14 year old homeschooler does the same but IS on a baseball and basketball team (which requires a lot of social stuff---including playing in public)........so, that is a ridiculous myth; besides, many of our kids struggle at school due to all the noises, environment, and get about 1-2 hours max a day out of the school learning itself; shocking, isn't it?? It IS true though as they are bothered by everything around them, colors, lighting, etc. At home, it IS what they want, where they want, etc. If you want to do it, work full time or not, YOU CAN DO IT!!! I know, as I do.........and I work about 60-80 a week as a registered daycare provider, IN MY HOME but I do have to work (I cannot just drop it for my own children all the time----------I am here and available but I AM STILL WORKING!!!!). Ruthie From: kellypywtorak Date: Thu, 29 May 2008 05:29:24 +0000Subject: Re: ( ) New Topic - In need of reassurance or advice ,I have 2 sisters-in-law who homeschool and they are both on oppositecoasts, but are very active in homeschool groups or associations wherethey go on regular field trips. I know these groups are all over thecountry with the surge in families who homeschool. They also go togymnastics, swim team, dance or karate--something like PE but not ateam sport. They are both very active in their churches so there issocialization with the kids from that. None of their kids havediagnoses, but I do suspect that the 3 oldest probably havesomething--ADHD or an ASD. The dad of the 3 oldest is such anundiagnosed Aspie, and we know it runs in families. Anyway, justletting you know there are hopes for social outlets withhomeschooling. If school doesn't go well, it's in the back of mymind. Of course, we'd have to move to an affordable state, not CA!!!> > > My son did well during the 2nd grade school year. He began to becomeobsessed with a little friend named Hannah. He would get angry whenshe spoke to other boys. He would get angry if she didn't say hello tohim. The relationship became very black and white as the yearprogressed. Hannah has done her best to be a friend to my son. 2 weeksago my son got into the car and the VP told me that he had bruises onhis face. That he had hit himself because he couldn't sit next toHannah. I asked why did they not call me immediately? She said thebruises did not appear until school was almost out. YET......theyfound my son in the cafeteria laying in a fetal position, violentlyslapping himself across the face. All the kids in the lunchroom werestanding on chairs to see what was happening. Hannah believed my sonwas having a heart attack. It scared her so much. No one called totell me this had happened. Not one call. My son had a bruise that tookup the whole> left side of his face and a large area behind his ear. You betterbelieve if he had come into school with bruises like that...they wouldhave called DFACS. When I questioned them further, they acted as if itwas nothing. Teachers were writing letters to Hannah's mother (who Iam friends with), Hannah's teacher was calling her. Hannah'steacher was going to my son's teacher and talking. Hannah's mother waswriting letters to both Principals and to teachers. I wrote letters tothe Principals and my son's teacher. They all called Hannah's motherback. Did I get a phone call? NOPE. I wrote a letter to the leadteacher for Special Education. I was firm and stated that she wouldchange his IEP before the school year ends. She would have a solution.The only relief in all this is that she did call me back. She didchange his IEP to take him out of the main classroom and into theInclusion/Co- Teaching classroom. He will have a normal 3rd gradeteacher and> a special ed. teacher all day.> > He came home upset over Hannah again Monday of this week. (Last weekof school) I decided to keep him home the rest of the week to removethe stresses of seeing Hannah. The obsession needs to be undercontrol. Out of sight, out of mind. The last 2 days he has not saidanything about Hannah or other boys that talk to her. I took him toschool to pick up his things. They refused to let me go back with him.Saying we would disrupt the class. Which I guess I can understand.But, it was their time for recess. They told me he could not saygoodbye to his friends under the circumstances. I was not yelling. Inever made a scene. Never said anything out of line. I did say that Ifelt they were not doing all they could to help in this finalweek of school. We would see them next year. The VP gave me a nastylook and walked away.> > It was the first time I have really been so hurt and felt sobetrayed by the school. I always felt they should have tested himearlier. He should not have been in SST for that long. They finallydid the testing as he went into second grade. Done at my insistance.I came armed with ALL his medical records. He did qualify for specialservices for Autistic children. We have been supportive of theirrecommendations. But...... . My son coming home from a melt down likethat, with a huge bruise on his face, was so shocking to me. Shouldn'tthey call to tell me my son was found in the cafeteria in a fetalposition slapping himself? They acted as if it was nothing. I came toquestion the teachers the next day. The VP spoke with me. Again, theyacted as if I was nuts. Like they could not understand what I wasupset about. I'm more upset than I have ever been with the school. Ihave kept my mouth shut for 4 years. Been cooperative. Then they treatmy family> this way. Gave a ton of support to Hannah's family.....as well theyshould have. NO support for my son or myself. I am absolutely furious.I really wonder now if he is safe at school. Those bruises don't showup like they did by one or two slaps to the face. He had been hittinghis face HARD for a while before anyone got to him.> > For anyone who read through this.....thanks. Thanks for letting mevent. I just don't know what to do. Not sure if I am wrong and need togive them a break. Or, if I am right. They did not protect my son. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 1, 2008 Report Share Posted June 1, 2008 1. always document what you understand to have happened with follow up letters. CC copies up the food chain. Be polite, firm and matter of fact when you write (just the facts, m'am!) 2. He needs to have an aide with him at all times to prevent injury to himself (and to others...although he didn't hurt anyone else and probably won't, if you say it like that, they will pay more attention, not wanting to explain to other parents why they did not act.) 3. Request an FBA (functional behavior assessment) be done as soon as school starts next fall to look over his needs in the classroom. He needs to have a "BP" Behavior plan in place right away so that when something happens - anything happens- they will follow the protocol set forth in the BP. Be sure and add yourself to the list as in, "Call parents" or "Call mother" when you feel you should be called. One year, we were #2 on the BP list, lol. And also put on the BP that you want a written incident report on all incidents he is in that require intervention. 4. It is weird how they were so attentive to Hannah's parents and Hannah's needs but totally blew you and yours off. I think it shows that they know how to communicate but they somehow felt they didn't need to do so with you. That would be written in every IEP from now on - that you be called early and often. I have done that a few times before. It is terrible that we have to state the obvious. But somehow they view some of our kids as evil villians. 5. Spend the summer over at www.wrightslaw.com and learn more about your rights and your son's rights in the IEP/sped process. Learn the language that will get you the attention you require! (oh yeah, hang around here with us, too, lol) 6. PS: Do not waste time playing nice. Always BE nice but only because you want to obtain an appropriate education for you child. They are not your friends and they never will be, even if they pretend and act that way. Do everything for the benefit of your son and don't hesitate based on hurting anyone's feelings or stepping on anyone's toes. Of course, do you best to schmooze as you get what your child needs! But do not let that stop you from pushing if you must. 7. Be sure and get social skill therapy in his IEP to address his needs in how to play with other kids, relate to other kids, - be social. He needs to learn better coping skills. All of this can be written into the IEP as goals and worked on either with the ST or with the counselor. RoxannaAutism Happens Re: ( ) New Topic - In need> of reassurance or advice> > > Oh .> I'm so sorry.> First,,,,,,did you take any pix of his bruise?> Also,,,,,,hopefully you are documenting all of this.> I think, in my opinion,,,,, you have a decision to> make.> Either pull him and keep him home (or find a new> school) OR> Fight the school.> They aren't doing what they should.> Is there any way you can contact your local or state> autism society and just explain what has happened/is> happening and see what they say?> I wish I had more to say.....I've pulled my son and> he's a new guy!!! > It was a decision that had to be made....and I> wasn't willing to fight.> Please keep us posted.> Hugs to you.> > Robin > "Normal is just a cycle on a washing machine"> > Wallbank <w_wittmayer> wrote:> Ok.......where to begin? My son (age 9 June 1) was> diagnosed with AS June of last year. For 3 years the> public school kept my son in SST (Student Support> Team). They said he did not qualify for further> testing at that time. Even though he displayed> symptoms that were affecting his school day. At the> end of first grade it was so clear that something> was seriously wrong. It went beyond the initial ADHD> diagnosis. We took all the steps and my son got the> AS diagnosis. I insisted at that time he be tested> for an IEP. Beginning of the next school year he was> tested and did qualify for special services under> the Autism diagnosis. The IEP allowed for a parapro> to be with my son in the afternoon only. Not on> recess.....where social interaction can be> challenging. To say the least. Sometimes, he ate> lunch without the parapro. Another social time with> noise and lots of motion. > > My son did well during the 2nd grade school year. He> began to become obsessed with a little friend named> Hannah. He would get angry when she spoke to other> boys. He would get angry if she didn't say hello to> him. The relationship became very black and white as> the year progressed. Hannah has done her best to be> a friend to my son. 2 weeks ago my son got into the> car and the VP told me that he had bruises on his> face. That he had hit himself because he couldn't> sit next to Hannah. I asked why did they not call me> immediately? She said the bruises did not appear> until school was almost out. YET......they found my> son in the cafeteria laying in a fetal position,> violently slapping himself across the face. All the> kids in the lunchroom were standing on chairs to see> what was happening. Hannah believed my son was> having a heart attack. It scared her so much. No one> called to tell me this had happened. Not one> call. My son had a bruise that took up the whole> left side of his face and a large area behind his> ear. You better believe if he had come into school> with bruises like that...they would have called> DFACS. When I questioned them further, they acted as> if it was nothing. Teachers were writing letters to> Hannah's mother (who I am friends with), Hannah's> teacher was calling her. Hannah's teacher was going> to my son's teacher and talking. Hannah's mother was> writing letters to both Principals and to teachers.> I wrote letters to the Principals and my son's> teacher. They all called Hannah's mother back. Did I> get a phone call? NOPE. I wrote a letter to the lead> teacher for Special Education. I was firm and stated> that she would change his IEP before the school year> ends. She would have a solution. The only relief in> all this is that she did call me back. She did> change his IEP to take him out of the main classroom> and into the Inclusion/Co- Teaching classroom. He> will have a normal 3rd grade teacher and> a special ed. teacher all day. > > He came home upset over Hannah again Monday of this> week. (Last week of school) I decided to keep him> home the rest of the week to remove the stresses of> seeing Hannah. The obsession needs to be under> control. Out of sight, out of mind. The last 2 days> he has not said anything about Hannah or other boys> that talk to her. I took him to school to pick up> his things. They refused to let me go back with him.> Saying we would disrupt the class. Which I guess I> can understand. But, it was their time for recess.> They told me he could not say goodbye to his friends> under the circumstances. I was not yelling. I never> made a scene. Never said anything out of line. I did> say that I felt they were not doing all they could> to help in this final week of school. We> would see them next year. The VP gave me a nasty> look and walked away. > > It was the first time I have really been so hurt and> felt so betrayed by the school. I always felt> they should have tested him earlier. He should not> have been in SST for that long. They finally did > the testing as he went into second grade. Done at my> insistance. I came armed with ALL his medical> records. He did qualify for special services for> Autistic children. We have been supportive of their> recommendations. But...... . My son coming home from> a melt down like that, with a huge bruise on his> face, was so shocking to me. Shouldn't they call to> tell me my son was found in the cafeteria in a fetal> position slapping himself? They acted as if it was> nothing. I came to question the teachers the next> day. The VP spoke with me. Again, they acted as if I> was nuts. Like they could not understand what I was> upset about. I'm more upset than I have ever been> with the school. I have kept my mouth shut for 4> years. Been cooperative. Then they treat my family> this way. Gave a ton of support to Hannah's> family.....as well they should have. NO support for> my son or myself. I am absolutely furious. I really> wonder now if he is safe at school. Those bruises> don't show up like they did by one or two slaps to> the face. He had been hitting his face HARD for a> while before anyone got to him. > > For anyone who read through this.....thanks. Thanks> for letting me vent. I just don't know what to do.> Not sure if I am wrong and need to give them a> break. Or, if I am right. They did not protect my> son. > > > Janice RushenMom, Mentor, Wife, Teacher, Advocate, Accountant,Maid, Taxi, Shopper, Bulletin Board ArtistNanny, Crafter, Therapist, Friend, Sister, Aunt,Daughter, Grand-daughter, Personal Care Aide,Student, Believer, and Giver. No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG. Version: 8.0.100 / Virus Database: 269.24.1/1464 - Release Date: 5/24/2008 8:56 AM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 1, 2008 Report Share Posted June 1, 2008 They say that a lot as these kids get older - into middle school and definitely high school levels - "He needs to...(whatever skill he has never been able to perform satisfactorily before...)" and "we aren't going to hold his hand anymore..." Well, of course they are if you let them know you plan to make sure the IEP is enforced appropriately. These kids don't magically grow the skills over the summer just because they are passed to the next grade. Skills they did not master now will not sprout out of their butt by fall. So definitely let them know that - well, a little nicer than I just put it, lol. If it's a skill that they need in order to do well in school, then put it on the IEP as a goal with steps as to how it is going to be taught step by step. RoxannaAutism Happens Re: ( ) New Topic - In> need> > of reassurance or advice> > > > > > Oh .> > I'm so sorry.> > First,,,,,,did you take any pix of his bruise?> > Also,,,,,,hopefully you are documenting all of> this.> > I think, in my opinion,,,,, you have a decision to> > make.> > Either pull him and keep him home (or find a new> > school) OR> > Fight the school.> > They aren't doing what they should.> > Is there any way you can contact your local or> state> > autism society and just explain what has> happened/is> > happening and see what they say?> > I wish I had more to say.....I've pulled my son> and> > he's a new guy!!! > > It was a decision that had to be made....and I> > wasn't willing to fight.> > Please keep us posted.> > Hugs to you.> > > > Robin > > "Normal is just a cycle on a washing machine"> > > > Wallbank <w_wittmayer> wrote:> > Ok.......where to begin? My son (age 9 June 1) was> > diagnosed with AS June of last year. For 3 years> the> > public school kept my son in SST (Student Support> > Team). They said he did not qualify for further> > testing at that time. Even though he displayed> > symptoms that were affecting his school day. At> the> > end of first grade it was so clear that something> > was seriously wrong. It went beyond the initial> ADHD> > diagnosis. We took all the steps and my son got> the> > AS diagnosis. I insisted at that time he be tested> > for an IEP. Beginning of the next school year he> was> > tested and did qualify for special services under> > the Autism diagnosis. The IEP allowed for a> parapro> > to be with my son in the afternoon only. Not on> > recess.....where social interaction can be> > challenging. To say the least. Sometimes, he ate> > lunch without the parapro. Another social time> with> > noise and lots of motion. > > > > My son did well during the 2nd grade school year.> He> > began to become obsessed with a little friend> named> > Hannah. He would get angry when she spoke to other> > boys. He would get angry if she didn't say hello> to> > him. The relationship became very black and white> as> > the year progressed. Hannah has done her best to> be> > a friend to my son. 2 weeks ago my son got into> the> > car and the VP told me that he had bruises on his> > face. That he had hit himself because he couldn't> > sit next to Hannah. I asked why did they not call> me> > immediately? She said the bruises did not appear> > until school was almost out. YET......they found> my> > son in the cafeteria laying in a fetal position,> > violently slapping himself across the face. All> the> > kids in the lunchroom were standing on chairs to> see> > what was happening. Hannah believed my son was> > having a heart attack. It scared her so much. No> one> > called to tell me this had happened. Not one> > call. My son had a bruise that took up the whole> > left side of his face and a large area behind his> > ear. You better believe if he had come into school> > with bruises like that...they would have called> > DFACS. When I questioned them further, they acted> as> > if it was nothing. Teachers were writing letters> to> > Hannah's mother (who I am friends with), Hannah's> > teacher was calling her. Hannah's teacher was> going> > to my son's teacher and talking. Hannah's mother> was> > writing letters to both Principals and to> teachers.> > I wrote letters to the Principals and my son's> > teacher. They all called Hannah's mother back. Did> I> > get a phone call? NOPE. I wrote a letter to the> lead> > teacher for Special Education. I was firm and> stated> > that she would change his IEP before the school> year> > ends. She would have a solution. The only relief> in> > all this is that she did call me back. She did> > change his IEP to take him out of the main> classroom> === message truncated ===Janice RushenMom, Mentor, Wife, Teacher, Advocate, Accountant,Maid, Taxi, Shopper, Bulletin Board ArtistNanny, Crafter, Therapist, Friend, Sister, Aunt,Daughter, Grand-daughter, Personal Care Aide,Student, Believer, and Giver. No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG. Version: 8.0.100 / Virus Database: 269.24.1/1464 - Release Date: 5/24/2008 8:56 AM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 1, 2008 Report Share Posted June 1, 2008 Definitely if the schedule was changed, they needed to have found a substitute aide for him to cover that change. It is their responsibility to make sure the IEP is followed. I think now after reading more of your replies that the school is not communicating with you because they are afraid of you filing complaints. If they downplay what happened with you, you might cool your jets and not file complaints. RoxannaAutism Happens Re: ( ) New Topic - In need of reassurance or advice , Can you call CPS (Child Protective Services) or whatever they call it in your state? This sounds like child abuse to me. When I was teaching, this would be something that I would have been required to report. I would report the school. It works both ways. Did you photograph the bruises? I hope he feels better soon. Best wishes, Liz On May 23, 2008, at 6:49 PM, Wallbank wrote: My son did well during the 2nd grade school year. He began to become obsessed with a little friend named Hannah. He would get angry when she spoke to other boys. He would get angry if she didn't say hello to him. The relationship became very black and white as the year progressed. Hannah has done her best to be a friend to my son. 2 weeks ago my son got into the car and the VP told me that he had bruises on his face. That he had hit himself because he couldn't sit next to Hannah. I asked why did they not call me immediately? She said the bruises did not appear until school was almost out. YET......they found my son in the cafeteria laying in a fetal position, violently slapping himself across the face. All the kids in the lunchroom were standing on chairs to see what was happening. Hannah believed my son was having a heart attack. It scared her so much. No one called to tell me this had happened. Not one call. My son had a bruise that took up the whole left side of his face and a large area behind his ear. You better believe if he had come into school with bruises like that...they would have called DFACS. When I questioned them further, they acted as if it was nothing. Teachers were writing letters to Hannah's mother (who I am friends with), Hannah's teacher was calling her. Hannah's teacher was going to my son's teacher and talking. Hannah's mother was writing letters to both Principals and to teachers. I wrote letters to the Principals and my son's teacher. They all called Hannah's mother back. Did I get a phone call? NOPE. I wrote a letter to the lead teacher for Special Education. I was firm and stated that she would change his IEP before the school year ends. She would have a solution. The only relief in all this is that she did call me back. She did change his IEP to take him out of the main classroom and into the Inclusion/Co- Teaching classroom. He will have a normal 3rd grade teacher and a special ed. teacher all day. He came home upset over Hannah again Monday of this week. (Last week of school) I decided to keep him home the rest of the week to remove the stresses of seeing Hannah. The obsession needs to be under control. Out of sight, out of mind. The last 2 days he has not said anything about Hannah or other boys that talk to her. I took him to school to pick up his things. They refused to let me go back with him. Saying we would disrupt the class. Which I guess I can understand. But, it was their time for recess. They told me he could not say goodbye to his friends under the circumstances. I was not yelling. I never made a scene. Never said anything out of line. I did say that I felt they were not doing all they could to help in this final week of school. We would see them next year. The VP gave me a nasty look and walked away. It was the first time I have really been so hurt and felt so betrayed by the school. I always felt they should have tested him earlier. He should not have been in SST for that long. They finally did the testing as he went into second grade. Done at my insistance. I came armed with ALL his medical records. He did qualify for special services for Autistic children. We have been supportive of their recommendations. But...... . My son coming home from a melt down like that, with a huge bruise on his face, was so shocking to me. Shouldn't they call to tell me my son was found in the cafeteria in a fetal position slapping himself? They acted as if it was nothing. I came to question the teachers the next day. The VP spoke with me. Again, they acted as if I was nuts. Like they could not understand what I was upset about. I'm more upset than I have ever been with the school. I have kept my mouth shut for 4 years. Been cooperative. Then they treat my family this way. Gave a ton of support to Hannah's family.....as well they should have. NO support for my son or myself. I am absolutely furious. I really wonder now if he is safe at school. Those bruises don't show up like they did by one or two slaps to the face. He had been hitting his face HARD for a while before anyone got to him. For anyone who read through this.....thanks. Thanks for letting me vent. I just don't know what to do. Not sure if I am wrong and need to give them a break. Or, if I am right. They did not protect my son. No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG. Version: 8.0.100 / Virus Database: 269.24.1/1470 - Release Date: 5/28/2008 7:20 AM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 2, 2008 Report Share Posted June 2, 2008 Hi Roxanna, As far as communication goes....I think the schools find it a lot easier to talk to parents of neuro-typical kids than to us. Parents of children with special needs are very pro-active. We have to be. Agreed, they downplayed the event to me. In order to avoid me filing a complaint. I felt that to be the case right away. The timing of this event stinks. The very end of the school year. Do other Aspies have a really difficult time at the end of the year? Wallbank - Wittmayer DOK Grace Chapter "Prayer without work is empty words,service without prayer is labor lost." Re: ( ) New Topic - In need> of reassurance or advice> > > Oh .> I'm so sorry.> First,,,,,,did you take any pix of his bruise?> Also,,,,,,hopefully you are documenting all of this.> I think, in my opinion,,,,, you have a decision to> make.> Either pull him and keep him home (or find a new> school) OR> Fight the school.> They aren't doing what they should.> Is there any way you can contact your local or state> autism society and just explain what has happened/is> happening and see what they say?> I wish I had more to say.....I've pulled my son and> he's a new guy!!! > It was a decision that had to be made....and I> wasn't willing to fight.> Please keep us posted.> Hugs to you.> > Robin > "Normal is just a cycle on a washing machine"> > Wallbank <w_wittmayer> wrote:> Ok.......where to begin? My son (age 9 June 1) was> diagnosed with AS June of last year. For 3 years the> public school kept my son in SST (Student Support> Team). They said he did not qualify for further> testing at that time. Even though he displayed> symptoms that were affecting his school day. At the> end of first grade it was so clear that something> was seriously wrong. It went beyond the initial ADHD> diagnosis. We took all the steps and my son got the> AS diagnosis. I insisted at that time he be tested> for an IEP. Beginning of the next school year he was> tested and did qualify for special services under> the Autism diagnosis. The IEP allowed for a parapro> to be with my son in the afternoon only. Not on> recess.....where social interaction can be> challenging. To say the least. Sometimes, he ate> lunch without the parapro. Another social time with> noise and lots of motion. > > My son did well during the 2nd grade school year. He> began to become obsessed with a little friend named> Hannah. He would get angry when she spoke to other> boys. He would get angry if she didn't say hello to> him. The relationship became very black and white as> the year progressed. Hannah has done her best to be> a friend to my son. 2 weeks ago my son got into the> car and the VP told me that he had bruises on his> face. That he had hit himself because he couldn't> sit next to Hannah. I asked why did they not call me> immediately? She said the bruises did not appear> until school was almost out. YET......they found my> son in the cafeteria laying in a fetal position,> violently slapping himself across the face. All the> kids in the lunchroom were standing on chairs to see> what was happening. Hannah believed my son was> having a heart attack. It scared her so much. No one> called to tell me this had happened. Not one> call. My son had a bruise that took up the whole> left side of his face and a large area behind his> ear. You better believe if he had come into school> with bruises like that...they would have called> DFACS. When I questioned them further, they acted as> if it was nothing. Teachers were writing letters to> Hannah's mother (who I am friends with), Hannah's> teacher was calling her. Hannah's teacher was going> to my son's teacher and talking. Hannah's mother was> writing letters to both Principals and to teachers.> I wrote letters to the Principals and my son's> teacher. They all called Hannah's mother back. Did I> get a phone call? NOPE. I wrote a letter to the lead> teacher for Special Education. I was firm and stated> that she would change his IEP before the school year> ends. She would have a solution. The only relief in> all this is that she did call me back. She did> change his IEP to take him out of the main classroom> and into the Inclusion/Co- Teaching classroom. He> will have a normal 3rd grade teacher and> a special ed. teacher all day. > > He came home upset over Hannah again Monday of this> week. (Last week of school) I decided to keep him> home the rest of the week to remove the stresses of> seeing Hannah. The obsession needs to be under> control. Out of sight, out of mind. The last 2 days> he has not said anything about Hannah or other boys> that talk to her. I took him to school to pick up> his things. They refused to let me go back with him.> Saying we would disrupt the class. Which I guess I> can understand. But, it was their time for recess.> They told me he could not say goodbye to his friends> under the circumstances. I was not yelling. I never> made a scene. Never said anything out of line. I did> say that I felt they were not doing all they could> to help in this final week of school. We> would see them next year. The VP gave me a nasty> look and walked away. > > It was the first time I have really been so hurt and> felt so betrayed by the school. I always felt> they should have tested him earlier. He should not> have been in SST for that long. They finally did > the testing as he went into second grade. Done at my> insistance. I came armed with ALL his medical> records. He did qualify for special services for> Autistic children. We have been supportive of their> recommendations. But...... . My son coming home from> a melt down like that, with a huge bruise on his> face, was so shocking to me. Shouldn't they call to> tell me my son was found in the cafeteria in a fetal> position slapping himself? They acted as if it was> nothing. I came to question the teachers the next> day. The VP spoke with me. Again, they acted as if I> was nuts. Like they could not understand what I was> upset about. I'm more upset than I have ever been> with the school. I have kept my mouth shut for 4> years. Been cooperative. Then they treat my family> this way. Gave a ton of support to Hannah's> family.....as well they should have. NO support for> my son or myself. I am absolutely furious. I really> wonder now if he is safe at school. Those bruises> don't show up like they did by one or two slaps to> the face. He had been hitting his face HARD for a> while before anyone got to him. > > For anyone who read through this.....thanks. Thanks> for letting me vent. I just don't know what to do.> Not sure if I am wrong and need to give them a> break. Or, if I am right. They did not protect my> son. > > > Janice RushenMom, Mentor, Wife, Teacher, Advocate, Accountant,Maid, Taxi, Shopper, Bulletin Board ArtistNanny, Crafter, Therapist, Friend, Sister, Aunt,Daughter, Grand-daughter, Personal Care Aide,Student, Believer, and Giver. No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG. Version: 8.0.100 / Virus Database: 269.24.1/1464 - Release Date: 5/24/2008 8:56 AM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 2, 2008 Report Share Posted June 2, 2008 No, we have a difficult time all year long; and, the public school for my 8th grader rarely did what they said they would or when they said they would; I had to fight and advocate for that, too. As for NT paretns, I do not agree; they love them, agreed, but not because of talking with them but because, unless there IS a problem, they never hear from them, so we are that much MORE annoying; we have to communicate a lot, and they hate that. It is the same with a lot of things in life; that is why we are so squeeky; they might as well start following the law. Today, there is a front page artical about (I think that is his name) re: kicked out of mass at 13, started someone's car in the church parking lot and was reving it up; okay, why was he able to get into someone's car with keys and do that!!?? If he is such a danger to the church / mass then who would be stupid enough to leave keys in their car, and why would you anyway? I grew up in rural Iowa, and there is not a sole that does not lock their car during church.....that would be a prime target for ANYONE looking for a quick break-in...duh!!! I am just angry again; everyday it is something with us advocating. Mom has a restraining order she's been given to stay off the church grounds; she is violating it and going to church anyway. I am going to have to say I support the mom here, and I do feel it is a violation of laws and right to worship. I think she is brave; I would hate that church already and never set foot on it again ever!!! So, kudos to that mom. Ruthie Dolezal From: w_wittmayer@...Date: Mon, 2 Jun 2008 06:41:08 -0700Subject: Re: ( ) New Topic - In need of reassurance or advice Hi Roxanna, As far as communication goes....I think the schools find it a lot easier to talk to parents of neuro-typical kids than to us. Parents of children with special needs are very pro-active. We have to be. Agreed, they downplayed the event to me. In order to avoid me filing a complaint. I felt that to be the case right away. The timing of this event stinks. The very end of the school year. Do other Aspies have a really difficult time at the end of the year? Wallbank - Wittmayer DOK Grace Chapter "Prayer without work is empty words,service without prayer is labor lost." Re: ( ) New Topic - In need> of reassurance or advice> > > Oh .> I'm so sorry.> First,,,,,,did you take any pix of his bruise?> Also,,,,,,hopefully you are documenting all of this.> I think, in my opinion,,,,, you have a decision to> make.> Either pull him and keep him home (or find a new> school) OR> Fight the school.> They aren't doing what they should.> Is there any way you can contact your local or state> autism society and just explain what has happened/is> happening and see what they say?> I wish I had more to say.....I've pulled my son and> he's a new guy!!! > It was a decision that had to be made....and I> wasn't willing to fight.> Please keep us posted.> Hugs to you.> > Robin > "Normal is just a cycle on a washing machine"> > Wallbank <w_wittmayer> wrote:> Ok.......where to begin? My son (age 9 June 1) was> diagnosed with AS June of last year. For 3 years the> public school kept my son in SST (Student Support> Team). They said he did not qualify for further> testing at that time. Even though he displayed> symptoms that were affecting his school day. At the> end of first grade it was so clear that something> was seriously wrong. It went beyond the initial ADHD> diagnosis. We took all the steps and my son got the> AS diagnosis. I insisted at that time he be tested> for an IEP. Beginning of the next school year he was> tested and did qualify for special services under> the Autism diagnosis. The IEP allowed for a parapro> to be with my son in the afternoon only. Not on> recess.....where social interaction can be> challenging. To say the least. Sometimes, he ate> lunch without the parapro. Another social time with> noise and lots of motion. > > My son did well during the 2nd grade school year. He> began to become obsessed with a little friend named> Hannah. He would get angry when she spoke to other> boys. He would get angry if she didn't say hello to> him. The relationship became very black and white as> the year progressed. Hannah has done her best to be> a friend to my son. 2 weeks ago my son got into the> car and the VP told me that he had bruises on his> face. That he had hit himself because he couldn't> sit next to Hannah. I asked why did they not call me> immediately? She said the bruises did not appear> until school was almost out. YET......they found my> son in the cafeteria laying in a fetal position,> violently slapping himself across the face. All the> kids in the lunchroom were standing on chairs to see> what was happening. Hannah believed my son was> having a heart attack. It scared her so much. No one> called to tell me this had happened. Not one> call. My son had a bruise that took up the whole> left side of his face and a large area behind his> ear. You better believe if he had come into school> with bruises like that...they would have called> DFACS. When I questioned them further, they acted as> if it was nothing. Teachers were writing letters to> Hannah's mother (who I am friends with), Hannah's> teacher was calling her. Hannah's teacher was going> to my son's teacher and talking. Hannah's mother was> writing letters to both Principals and to teachers.> I wrote letters to the Principals and my son's> teacher. They all called Hannah's mother back. Did I> get a phone call? NOPE. I wrote a letter to the lead> teacher for Special Education. I was firm and stated> that she would change his IEP before the school year> ends. She would have a solution. The only relief in> all this is that she did call me back. She did> change his IEP to take him out of the main classroom> and into the Inclusion/Co- Teaching classroom. He> will have a normal 3rd grade teacher and> a special ed. teacher all day. > > He came home upset over Hannah again Monday of this> week. (Last week of school) I decided to keep him> home the rest of the week to remove the stresses of> seeing Hannah. The obsession needs to be under> control. Out of sight, out of mind. The last 2 days> he has not said anything about Hannah or other boys> that talk to her. I took him to school to pick up> his things. They refused to let me go back with him.> Saying we would disrupt the class. Which I guess I> can understand. But, it was their time for recess.> They told me he could not say goodbye to his friends> under the circumstances. I was not yelling. I never> made a scene. Never said anything out of line. I did> say that I felt they were not doing all they could> to help in this final week of school. We> would see them next year. The VP gave me a nasty> look and walked away. > > It was the first time I have really been so hurt and> felt so betrayed by the school. I always felt> they should have tested him earlier. He should not> have been in SST for that long. They finally did > the testing as he went into second grade. Done at my> insistance. I came armed with ALL his medical> records. He did qualify for special services for> Autistic children. We have been supportive of their> recommendations. But...... . My son coming home from> a melt down like that, with a huge bruise on his> face, was so shocking to me. Shouldn't they call to> tell me my son was found in the cafeteria in a fetal> position slapping himself? They acted as if it was> nothing. I came to question the teachers the next> day. The VP spoke with me. Again, they acted as if I> was nuts. Like they could not understand what I was> upset about. I'm more upset than I have ever been> with the school. I have kept my mouth shut for 4> years. Been cooperative. Then they treat my family> this way. Gave a ton of support to Hannah's> family.....as well they should have. NO support for> my son or myself. I am absolutely furious. I really> wonder now if he is safe at school. Those bruises> don't show up like they did by one or two slaps to> the face. He had been hitting his face HARD for a> while before anyone got to him. > > For anyone who read through this.....thanks. Thanks> for letting me vent. I just don't know what to do.> Not sure if I am wrong and need to give them a> break. Or, if I am right. They did not protect my> son. > > > Janice RushenMom, Mentor, Wife, Teacher, Advocate, Accountant,Maid, Taxi, Shopper, Bulletin Board ArtistNanny, Crafter, Therapist, Friend, Sister, Aunt,Daughter, Grand-daughter, Personal Care Aide,Student, Believer, and Giver. No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG. Version: 8.0.100 / Virus Database: 269.24.1/1464 - Release Date: 5/24/2008 8:56 AM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 2, 2008 Report Share Posted June 2, 2008 I find it helps to be proactive and put things into the IEP. (But that's actually reactive in response to issues we've had in the past.) Then keep saying the same thing over and over to whoever needs to know. My 7th grader has an adult with him at all times at school except: changing for PE, in the restroom, in the Cool Zone. I walk him into school until he gets in resource (self-contained due to short day schedule) and someone is with him until I acknowledge them in the carpool line. Someone will always know what happened if something happened, which is less likely if someone is with him. If anything really major (class disrupting meltdown) happens, each witnessing adult writes an account including any verbal or physical exchanges. So we can hopefully make progress! If someone is doing something to aggravate things, we want to do our best to avoid that in the future. And if we determine that something we put into the BIP really isn't working, either, we don't want to keep doing it! To tell you the truth, I get alot of ideas to be proactive from issues I read about on this list. So, to all of you that had have headaches--you're helping to prevent them for us! Jackie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 2, 2008 Report Share Posted June 2, 2008 " It is terrible that we have to state the obvious. " Take the concept of " it goes without saying " completely out of your mindset!! I may send very odd emails to school sometimes, but then someone will come back and tell me " thanks for letting me know, I wouldn't have thought of that. " (That was in response to my " April Fools Day and autism--a bad mix " email.) I also sent one that I told them a certain kid in one of my kids classes was a historic problem. If something else were to happen to rile him up, my kid might make that kid a target of something. They made sure they were seated on opposite sides of the room. Sometimes it's the little things that can make a difference. Jackie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 4, 2008 Report Share Posted June 4, 2008 I was afraid of regression too. In some ways, regression happens no matter what. So don't always assume it's due to what you have done specifically. I mean to say, don't always blame yourself. Education wise, my ds has done really well this year as we have e-schooled. He never does well in social studies and has no interest in what people did years ago, let alone what they do today. lol. But with me guiding him through the material, he has an "A" in social studies. It surprised him, even. I think it's just because I was here and was not going to let him snooze through it. I actually care that he learns some of it instead of just getting a specific grade. So in that sense, it has made a big difference. I can also present material in ways that speak to his strengths, which REALLy helps. I have compared what we are learning to things going on today and that has helped improve his interest. Plus, I read it to him and I think that also helps. He has comprehension issues so I stop at regular intervals, asking questions, making comments and comparing incidents to other incidents. So he has more chance of remembering what we are doing. It has worked out well. RoxannaAutism Happens Re: ( ) New Topic - In need of reassurance or advice ,I have 2 sisters-in-law who homeschool and they are both on oppositecoasts, but are very active in homeschool groups or associations wherethey go on regular field trips. I know these groups are all over thecountry with the surge in families who homeschool. They also go togymnastics, swim team, dance or karate--something like PE but not ateam sport. They are both very active in their churches so there issocialization with the kids from that. None of their kids havediagnoses, but I do suspect that the 3 oldest probably havesomething--ADHD or an ASD. The dad of the 3 oldest is such anundiagnosed Aspie, and we know it runs in families. Anyway, justletting you know there are hopes for social outlets withhomeschooling. If school doesn't go well, it's in the back of mymind. Of course, we'd have to move to an affordable state, not CA!!!> > > My son did well during the 2nd grade school year. He began to becomeobsessed with a little friend named Hannah. He would get angry whenshe spoke to other boys. He would get angry if she didn't say hello tohim. The relationship became very black and white as the yearprogressed. Hannah has done her best to be a friend to my son. 2 weeksago my son got into the car and the VP told me that he had bruises onhis face. That he had hit himself because he couldn't sit next toHannah. I asked why did they not call me immediately? She said thebruises did not appear until school was almost out. YET......theyfound my son in the cafeteria laying in a fetal position, violentlyslapping himself across the face. All the kids in the lunchroom werestanding on chairs to see what was happening. Hannah believed my sonwas having a heart attack. It scared her so much. No one called totell me this had happened. Not one call. My son had a bruise that tookup the whole> left side of his face and a large area behind his ear. You betterbelieve if he had come into school with bruises like that...they wouldhave called DFACS. When I questioned them further, they acted as if itwas nothing. Teachers were writing letters to Hannah's mother (who Iam friends with), Hannah's teacher was calling her. Hannah'steacher was going to my son's teacher and talking. Hannah's mother waswriting letters to both Principals and to teachers. I wrote letters tothe Principals and my son's teacher. They all called Hannah's motherback. Did I get a phone call? NOPE. I wrote a letter to the leadteacher for Special Education. I was firm and stated that she wouldchange his IEP before the school year ends. She would have a solution.The only relief in all this is that she did call me back. She didchange his IEP to take him out of the main classroom and into theInclusion/Co- Teaching classroom. He will have a normal 3rd gradeteacher and> a special ed. teacher all day.> > He came home upset over Hannah again Monday of this week. (Last weekof school) I decided to keep him home the rest of the week to removethe stresses of seeing Hannah. The obsession needs to be undercontrol. Out of sight, out of mind. The last 2 days he has not saidanything about Hannah or other boys that talk to her. I took him toschool to pick up his things. They refused to let me go back with him.Saying we would disrupt the class. Which I guess I can understand.But, it was their time for recess. They told me he could not saygoodbye to his friends under the circumstances. I was not yelling. Inever made a scene. Never said anything out of line. I did say that Ifelt they were not doing all they could to help in this finalweek of school. We would see them next year. The VP gave me a nastylook and walked away.> > It was the first time I have really been so hurt and felt sobetrayed by the school. I always felt they should have tested himearlier. He should not have been in SST for that long. They finallydid the testing as he went into second grade. Done at my insistance.I came armed with ALL his medical records. He did qualify for specialservices for Autistic children. We have been supportive of theirrecommendations. But...... . My son coming home from a melt down likethat, with a huge bruise on his face, was so shocking to me. Shouldn'tthey call to tell me my son was found in the cafeteria in a fetalposition slapping himself? They acted as if it was nothing. I came toquestion the teachers the next day. The VP spoke with me. Again, theyacted as if I was nuts. Like they could not understand what I wasupset about. I'm more upset than I have ever been with the school. Ihave kept my mouth shut for 4 years. Been cooperative. Then they treatmy family> this way. Gave a ton of support to Hannah's family.....as well theyshould have. NO support for my son or myself. I am absolutely furious.I really wonder now if he is safe at school. Those bruises don't showup like they did by one or two slaps to the face. He had been hittinghis face HARD for a while before anyone got to him.> > For anyone who read through this.....thanks. Thanks for letting mevent. I just don't know what to do. Not sure if I am wrong and need togive them a break. Or, if I am right. They did not protect my son. > > > No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG. Version: 8.0.100 / Virus Database: 269.24.3/1472 - Release Date: 5/29/2008 7:27 AM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 5, 2008 Report Share Posted June 5, 2008 I would say yes. You know at the end of the year - everything is more hyper. The teacher is taking down art off the walls, desks are being cleaned out, field trips are taken, discussion is had about "next school year" and "what will you do over your summer break?" Many kids who crave routine will be thrown off by all these things. RoxannaAutism Happens Re: ( ) New Topic - In need> of reassurance or advice> > > Oh .> I'm so sorry.> First,,,,,,did you take any pix of his bruise?> Also,,,,,,hopefully you are documenting all of this.> I think, in my opinion,,,,, you have a decision to> make.> Either pull him and keep him home (or find a new> school) OR> Fight the school.> They aren't doing what they should.> Is there any way you can contact your local or state> autism society and just explain what has happened/is> happening and see what they say?> I wish I had more to say.....I've pulled my son and> he's a new guy!!! > It was a decision that had to be made....and I> wasn't willing to fight.> Please keep us posted.> Hugs to you.> > Robin > "Normal is just a cycle on a washing machine"> > Wallbank <w_wittmayer> wrote:> Ok.......where to begin? My son (age 9 June 1) was> diagnosed with AS June of last year. For 3 years the> public school kept my son in SST (Student Support> Team). They said he did not qualify for further> testing at that time. Even though he displayed> symptoms that were affecting his school day. At the> end of first grade it was so clear that something> was seriously wrong. It went beyond the initial ADHD> diagnosis. We took all the steps and my son got the> AS diagnosis. I insisted at that time he be tested> for an IEP. Beginning of the next school year he was> tested and did qualify for special services under> the Autism diagnosis. The IEP allowed for a parapro> to be with my son in the afternoon only. Not on> recess.....where social interaction can be> challenging. To say the least. Sometimes, he ate> lunch without the parapro. Another social time with> noise and lots of motion. > > My son did well during the 2nd grade school year. He> began to become obsessed with a little friend named> Hannah. He would get angry when she spoke to other> boys. He would get angry if she didn't say hello to> him. The relationship became very black and white as> the year progressed. Hannah has done her best to be> a friend to my son. 2 weeks ago my son got into the> car and the VP told me that he had bruises on his> face. That he had hit himself because he couldn't> sit next to Hannah. I asked why did they not call me> immediately? She said the bruises did not appear> until school was almost out. YET......they found my> son in the cafeteria laying in a fetal position,> violently slapping himself across the face. All the> kids in the lunchroom were standing on chairs to see> what was happening. Hannah believed my son was> having a heart attack. It scared her so much. No one> called to tell me this had happened. Not one> call. My son had a bruise that took up the whole> left side of his face and a large area behind his> ear. You better believe if he had come into school> with bruises like that...they would have called> DFACS. When I questioned them further, they acted as> if it was nothing. Teachers were writing letters to> Hannah's mother (who I am friends with), Hannah's> teacher was calling her. Hannah's teacher was going> to my son's teacher and talking. Hannah's mother was> writing letters to both Principals and to teachers.> I wrote letters to the Principals and my son's> teacher. They all called Hannah's mother back. Did I> get a phone call? NOPE. I wrote a letter to the lead> teacher for Special Education. I was firm and stated> that she would change his IEP before the school year> ends. She would have a solution. The only relief in> all this is that she did call me back. She did> change his IEP to take him out of the main classroom> and into the Inclusion/Co- Teaching classroom. He> will have a normal 3rd grade teacher and> a special ed. teacher all day. > > He came home upset over Hannah again Monday of this> week. (Last week of school) I decided to keep him> home the rest of the week to remove the stresses of> seeing Hannah. The obsession needs to be under> control. Out of sight, out of mind. The last 2 days> he has not said anything about Hannah or other boys> that talk to her. I took him to school to pick up> his things. They refused to let me go back with him.> Saying we would disrupt the class. Which I guess I> can understand. But, it was their time for recess.> They told me he could not say goodbye to his friends> under the circumstances. I was not yelling. I never> made a scene. Never said anything out of line. I did> say that I felt they were not doing all they could> to help in this final week of school. We> would see them next year. The VP gave me a nasty> look and walked away. > > It was the first time I have really been so hurt and> felt so betrayed by the school. I always felt> they should have tested him earlier. He should not> have been in SST for that long. They finally did > the testing as he went into second grade. Done at my> insistance. I came armed with ALL his medical> records. He did qualify for special services for> Autistic children. We have been supportive of their> recommendations. But...... . My son coming home from> a melt down like that, with a huge bruise on his> face, was so shocking to me. Shouldn't they call to> tell me my son was found in the cafeteria in a fetal> position slapping himself? They acted as if it was> nothing. I came to question the teachers the next> day. The VP spoke with me. Again, they acted as if I> was nuts. Like they could not understand what I was> upset about. I'm more upset than I have ever been> with the school. I have kept my mouth shut for 4> years. Been cooperative. Then they treat my family> this way. Gave a ton of support to Hannah's> family.....as well they should have. NO support for> my son or myself. I am absolutely furious. I really> wonder now if he is safe at school. Those bruises> don't show up like they did by one or two slaps to> the face. He had been hitting his face HARD for a> while before anyone got to him. > > For anyone who read through this.....thanks. Thanks> for letting me vent. I just don't know what to do.> Not sure if I am wrong and need to give them a> break. Or, if I am right. They did not protect my> son. > > > Janice RushenMom, Mentor, Wife, Teacher, Advocate, Accountant,Maid, Taxi, Shopper, Bulletin Board ArtistNanny, Crafter, Therapist, Friend, Sister, Aunt,Daughter, Grand-daughter, Personal Care Aide,Student, Believer, and Giver. No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG. Version: 8.0.100 / Virus Database: 269.24.1/1464 - Release Date: 5/24/2008 8:56 AM No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG. Version: 8.0.100 / Virus Database: 269.24.4/1478 - Release Date: 6/2/2008 7:12 AM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 14, 2008 Report Share Posted June 14, 2008 I just started homeschooling 3 months ago. The best thing I did (wish I had done this before starting) was join a homeschool group. So many of your questions can be answered there by experienced homeschoolers.Stacey Speakman <mom2two23@...> wrote: How do you get started in homeschooling?BRYAN DOLEZAL <DOLEZAL123msn> wrote: The social myth is prevalent and narrow minded really: I say that to myself (and others I guess) but I Can say it 'CUZ i USED TO POSSESS IT MYSELF!!! Now I homeschool one, public school 2; I am disliking public school more and more though!! How many of you sit at home all day, knitting, weaving, and sitting on your rumps doing nothing? I know that sounds ridiculous, and it is. Are you ever in your yard? Does someone drive by and wave, stop and say HI, maybe even talk to you, your child, etc.? That is SOCIALIZATION. We grocery shop, eat out, go to the mall, walk outside or anywhere else, go to sporting events, church activities, etc. THESE ARE ALL SOCIALIZING, dealing with the public, getting out; you do it all day long every single day. Answer the door...home, have your child do it, make good eye contact, etc. Practice. We do!! We DO practice. But, point is, my son is in the yard playing ball with four neighbor kids right now; they seem to come here, but he is playing wonderfully with them; I am butting out; he is doing great, and this is social. He is in public school but that does not matter; my 14 year old homeschooler does the same but IS on a baseball and basketball team (which requires a lot of social stuff---including playing in public)........so, that is a ridiculous myth; besides, many of our kids struggle at school due to all the noises, environment, and get about 1-2 hours max a day out of the school learning itself; shocking, isn't it?? It IS true though as they are bothered by everything around them, colors, lighting, etc. At home, it IS what they want, where they want, etc. If you want to do it, work full time or not, YOU CAN DO IT!!! I know, as I do.........and I work about 60-80 a week as a registered daycare provider, IN MY HOME but I do have to work (I cannot just drop it for my own children all the time----------I am here and available but I AM STILL WORKING!!!!). Ruthie From: kellypywtorak Date: Thu, 29 May 2008 05:29:24 +0000Subject: Re: ( ) New Topic - In need of reassurance or advice ,I have 2 sisters-in-law who homeschool and they are both on oppositecoasts, but are very active in homeschool groups or associations wherethey go on regular field trips. I know these groups are all over thecountry with the surge in families who homeschool. They also go togymnastics, swim team, dance or karate--something like PE but not ateam sport. They are both very active in their churches so there issocialization with the kids from that. None of their kids havediagnoses, but I do suspect that the 3 oldest probably havesomething--ADHD or an ASD. The dad of the 3 oldest is such anundiagnosed Aspie, and we know it runs in families. Anyway, justletting you know there are hopes for social outlets withhomeschooling. If school doesn't go well, it's in the back of mymind. Of course, we'd have to move to an affordable state, not CA!!!> > > My son did well during the 2nd grade school year. He began to becomeobsessed with a little friend named Hannah. He would get angry whenshe spoke to other boys. He would get angry if she didn't say hello tohim. The relationship became very black and white as the yearprogressed. Hannah has done her best to be a friend to my son. 2 weeksago my son got into the car and the VP told me that he had bruises onhis face. That he had hit himself because he couldn't sit next toHannah. I asked why did they not call me immediately? She said thebruises did not appear until school was almost out. YET......theyfound my son in the cafeteria laying in a fetal position, violentlyslapping himself across the face. All the kids in the lunchroom werestanding on chairs to see what was happening. Hannah believed my sonwas having a heart attack. It scared her so much. No one called totell me this had happened. Not one call. My son had a bruise that tookup the whole> left side of his face and a large area behind his ear. You betterbelieve if he had come into school with bruises like that...they wouldhave called DFACS. When I questioned them further, they acted as if itwas nothing. Teachers were writing letters to Hannah's mother (who Iam friends with), Hannah's teacher was calling her. Hannah'steacher was going to my son's teacher and talking. Hannah's mother waswriting letters to both Principals and to teachers. I wrote letters tothe Principals and my son's teacher. They all called Hannah's motherback. Did I get a phone call? NOPE. I wrote a letter to the leadteacher for Special Education. I was firm and stated that she wouldchange his IEP before the school year ends. She would have a solution.The only relief in all this is that she did call me back. She didchange his IEP to take him out of the main classroom and into theInclusion/Co- Teaching classroom. He will have a normal 3rd gradeteacher and> a special ed. teacher all day.> > He came home upset over Hannah again Monday of this week. (Last weekof school) I decided to keep him home the rest of the week to removethe stresses of seeing Hannah. The obsession needs to be undercontrol. Out of sight, out of mind. The last 2 days he has not saidanything about Hannah or other boys that talk to her. I took him toschool to pick up his things. They refused to let me go back with him.Saying we would disrupt the class. Which I guess I can understand.But, it was their time for recess. They told me he could not saygoodbye to his friends under the circumstances. I was not yelling. Inever made a scene. Never said anything out of line. I did say that Ifelt they were not doing all they could to help in this finalweek of school. We would see them next year. The VP gave me a nastylook and walked away.> > It was the first time I have really been so hurt and felt sobetrayed by the school. I always felt they should have tested himearlier. He should not have been in SST for that long. They finallydid the testing as he went into second grade. Done at my insistance.I came armed with ALL his medical records. He did qualify for specialservices for Autistic children. We have been supportive of theirrecommendations. But...... . My son coming home from a melt down likethat, with a huge bruise on his face, was so shocking to me. Shouldn'tthey call to tell me my son was found in the cafeteria in a fetalposition slapping himself? They acted as if it was nothing. I came toquestion the teachers the next day. The VP spoke with me. Again, theyacted as if I was nuts. Like they could not understand what I wasupset about. I'm more upset than I have ever been with the school. Ihave kept my mouth shut for 4 years. Been cooperative. Then they treatmy family> this way. Gave a ton of support to Hannah's family.....as well theyshould have. NO support for my son or myself. I am absolutely furious.I really wonder now if he is safe at school. Those bruises don't showup like they did by one or two slaps to the face. He had been hittinghis face HARD for a while before anyone got to him.> > For anyone who read through this.....thanks. Thanks for letting mevent. I just don't know what to do. Not sure if I am wrong and need togive them a break. Or, if I am right. They did not protect my son. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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