Re: Teens are so difficult

[Guest guest]

Oh Jan. Sadly,,,,I think you and the other mom are both justified. That's why this sucks the big one so badly.

Ugh....

Not much to say on this....just that I feel for you. I often read your posts and am a bit jealous....yep, jealous, that your son goes places.....has people to see and do things with. My son does, but rarely. He doesnt' really want it like yours.

But,,,,along with being more of a social kid with AS, this crap happens. Ick.

Again,,,,sorry....and hugs.

Robin

From: jrushen <jrushen@...>Subject: ( ) Teens are so difficult Date: Sunday, January 25, 2009, 2:15 PM

My son asked my girlfriend's daughter an inappropriate question in church....he just wanted to prove everyone else wrong...that what they were saying about her was Wrong....but of course, she took it the wrong way...she said she my son said it out loud and my son said he whispered it. My son then said he didn't...he whispered it. And, then he told us that she told him she Hated him and he was annoying. And, when he asked her to say hello to her brother for him...she said no. So, my son told me in the car that he hates her and doesn't care about her anymore. We talked about it and his mobile therapist talked to him. She told him hate is too strong...just stay away and realized that you don't have to like everyone...but that doesn't mean you have to hate!Well, we went to church today...my said stayed away from her ....but later my friend (the mom) came over and told me that her daughter was

upset ...she said my son texted her and said "F" you. UGH! My son said and does all the wrong things when he is upset and angry. I guess teens do that....but it always seems like it happens to my son.I am embarrassed, mortified and felt a little hurt that my friend didnt' realize how hurt my son was....he was deeply hurt by his daughter...they had been friends since he was 2 years old. I sat in church and cried....Do any of you feel like this or am I so sensitive and worry too much!Help!Jan

[Guest guest]

I had to parent my now 18 year old with Asperger's very differently than I thought. He really challenged me to the core, but we did come out the other side. He is still very difficult, but he has matured and loosened a little bit. Pam A Good Credit Score is 700 or Above. See yours in just 2 easy steps!

[Guest guest]

Thanks Robin,,,,I guess there are pluses and minuses to both sides of everything. I use to wish my son wanted friends less...ha ha. He still won't do a lot of things...like afterschool activities, dances, ski, snowboard, etc. etc. The youth group at church is having a fun day with sleigh riding, lunch, games, ice skating, dinner, etc. and he doesn't want to go. He said it is "stupid"....and he doesn't want to help make he hoagies this Saturday...he said he doesn't want to waste his Saturday....UGH! I am not going to make him go on the trip but I would like him to help make the hoagies....should I make him go? Maybe I am pushing him too fast...at least he is going to confirmation class...although he says it is stupid. I guess it might be the age...teens...but I don't like when he says things like burn in hell. Is it the age where

they defy everything including God? Is it because it is not "Cool" to believe and go to church. I think alot of teens don't go and that is why he doesn't want to do a lot of things with the church. It is just isn't "cool".

Thanks for your note....I guess we all have our "problems".

Jan

Janice Rushen

"I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope"

From: jrushen <jrushen (DOT) com>Subject: ( ) Teens are so difficult Date: Sunday, January 25, 2009, 2:15 PM

My son asked my girlfriend's daughter an inappropriate question in church....he just wanted to prove everyone else wrong...that what they were saying about her was Wrong....but of course, she took it the wrong way...she said she my son said it out loud and my son said he whispered it. My son then said he didn't...he whispered it. And, then he told us that she told him she Hated him and he was annoying. And, when he asked her to say hello to her brother for him...she said no. So, my son told me in the car that he hates her and doesn't care about her anymore. We talked about it and his mobile therapist talked to him. She told him hate is too strong...just stay away and realized that you don't have to like everyone...but that doesn't mean you have to hate!Well, we went to church today...my said stayed away from her ....but later my friend (the mom) came over and told me that her daughter was

upset ...she said my son texted her and said "F" you. UGH! My son said and does all the wrong things when he is upset and angry. I guess teens do that....but it always seems like it happens to my son.I am embarrassed, mortified and felt a little hurt that my friend didnt' realize how hurt my son was....he was deeply hurt by his daughter...they had been friends since he was 2 years old. I sat in church and cried....Do any of you feel like this or am I so sensitive and worry too much!Help!Jan

[Guest guest]

I don't know Jan. I never wanted to go to church....but I was made to. I don't know of many kids that actually want to go. But,,,,it's something that we were made to do. I'm glad NOW. he he.

As far as church stuff. If it has to do with the group,,,,,then I'd think he should do it. BUT, he may be getting (or already have) a sour taste from all the mis-said words/reactions.

Man,,,,,I hear ya. I personally, think, that if he wants to go to part of it, then he should go to all of it.

My son, would also, love to do certain parts of things and then suddenly (well,,,not suddenly), but gets a case of the "No way,,,,I dont' want to do it's"......it sucks.

I'm starting to see, as he gets older, and you too, probably,,,,that it's not that he can't...it's that he doesn't want to.

Another hard thing, is.....how do you make your son go, though, and make hoagies?

Maybe just tell him that that's part of the group plan, and if he wants to go with the group, then he does the hoagies. If he doesn't want to do it all, then he doesn't go. I wouldn't push it. If he doesn't want to go, forcing him is gonna end up badly, probably, right? Let him make the decision and stand by him and it.

At least you have an understanding group, it seems. Thank goodness.

Good luck.

Robin

From: jrushen <jrushen (DOT) com>Subject: ( ) Teens are so difficult Date: Sunday, January 25, 2009, 2:15 PM

My son asked my girlfriend's daughter an inappropriate question in church....he just wanted to prove everyone else wrong...that what they were saying about her was Wrong....but of course, she took it the wrong way...she said she my son said it out loud and my son said he whispered it. My son then said he didn't...he whispered it. And, then he told us that she told him she Hated him and he was annoying. And, when he asked her to say hello to her brother for him...she said no. So, my son told me in the car that he hates her and doesn't care about her anymore. We talked about it and his mobile therapist talked to him. She told him hate is too strong...just stay away and realized that you don't have to like everyone...but that doesn't mean you have to hate!Well, we went to church today...my said stayed away from her ....but later my friend (the mom) came over and told me that her daughter was

upset ...she said my son texted her and said "F" you. UGH! My son said and does all the wrong things when he is upset and angry. I guess teens do that....but it always seems like it happens to my son.I am embarrassed, mortified and felt a little hurt that my friend didnt' realize how hurt my son was....he was deeply hurt by his daughter...they had been friends since he was 2 years old. I sat in church and cried....Do any of you feel like this or am I so sensitive and worry too much!Help!Jan

[Guest guest]

Jan,

I haven't been able to follow the group on a regular basis, so I don't

remember how old you son is. Mine is now 19 and if yours is anything

like mine, things WILL get better. Until his junior year of HS, my son

was in trouble all of the time and that included inappropriate remarks

to girls. He now goes to the local community college, he has a group

of friends with whom he has started to hang with, and he is actually

going to ask a young later (she is older-- is 20 already) out for V-Day.

Until this last summer, I did not have to worry about him sending text

messages in anger as I blocked all text messages until he started

college-- now he pays for an unlimited use plan since she texts a

zillion messages a month.

Debbi in SO CA

>

> My son asked my girlfriend's daughter an inappropriate question in

> church....he just wanted to prove everyone else wrong...that what

> they were saying about her was Wrong....but of course, she took it

> the wrong way...she said she my son said it out loud and my son said

> he whispered it. My son then said he didn't...he whispered it. And,

> then he told us that she told him she Hated him and he was annoying.

> And, when he asked her to say hello to her brother for him...she said

> no. So, my son told me in the car that he hates her and doesn't care

> about her anymore. We talked about it and his mobile therapist talked

> to him. She told him hate is too strong...just stay away and

> realized that you don't have to like everyone...but that doesn't mean

> you have to hate!

>

> Well, we went to church today...my said stayed away from her ....but

> later my friend (the mom) came over and told me that her daughter was

> upset ...she said my son texted her and said " F " you. UGH! My son

> said and does all the wrong things when he is upset and angry. I

> guess teens do that....but it always seems like it happens to my son.

>

> I am embarrassed, mortified and felt a little hurt that my friend

> didnt' realize how hurt my son was....he was deeply hurt by his

> daughter...they had been friends since he was 2 years old. I sat in

> church and cried....

>

> Do any of you feel like this or am I so sensitive and worry too much!

> Help!

>

> Jan

>

[Guest guest]

My son (12, Aspergers) is to the point now that whatever is going on outside of our house has to be pretty tempting to pass up Wii/computer game time. I've put my foot down and said "okay, you don't have to go to <blank> but you are not going to stay here and play video games. So if that's what is holding you back, you might want to rethink your position." Sometimes that helps, but not as much as it used to when he was younger. I've also realized my son's initial response of "no" to anything new/different needs to be acknowledged, but I still usually get him out of his comfort zone to some degree. If I never did that, he'd never try anything new (food, activities, etc...) Now, I wouldn't force him to go to a school dance (between the loud noise and the anxiety, he'd have a horrible time, I think) but I will "encourage" (nice version of "make!") him to do other

stuff. I never make it like "I'm making you go and you have to go and there's no arguing" but instead frame it like "I really think you're going to enjoy this so let's give it a try." My goal is to get him out in the world as much as he can.

"Over-optimism is waiting for you ship to come in when you haven't sent one out."

From: rushen janice <jrushen@...> Sent: Monday, January 26, 2009 4:02:20 AMSubject: Re: ( ) Teens are so difficult

Thanks Robin,,,,I guess there are pluses and minuses to both sides of everything. I use to wish my son wanted friends less...ha ha. He still won't do a lot of things...like afterschool activities, dances, ski, snowboard, etc. etc. The youth group at church is having a fun day with sleigh riding, lunch, games, ice skating, dinner, etc. and he doesn't want to go. He said it is "stupid".... and he doesn't want to help make he hoagies this Saturday...he said he doesn't want to waste his Saturday.... UGH! I am not going to make him go on the trip but I would like him to help make the hoagies....should I make him go? Maybe I am pushing him too fast...at least he is going to confirmation class...although he says it is stupid. I guess it might be the age...teens. ..but I don't like when he says things like burn in hell. Is it the age where they defy everything including God? Is it because it is not "Cool" to believe and go to church.

I think alot of teens don't go and that is why he doesn't want to do a lot of things with the church. It is just isn't "cool".

Thanks for your note....I guess we all have our "problems".

Jan

Janice Rushen

"I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope"

From: jrushen <jrushen (DOT) com>Subject: ( ) Teens are so difficult Date: Sunday, January 25, 2009, 2:15 PM

My son asked my girlfriend's daughter an inappropriate question in church....he just wanted to prove everyone else wrong...that what they were saying about her was Wrong....but of course, she took it the wrong way...she said she my son said it out loud and my son said he whispered it. My son then said he didn't...he whispered it. And, then he told us that she told him she Hated him and he was annoying. And, when he asked her to say hello to her brother for him...she said no. So, my son told me in the car that he hates her and doesn't care about her anymore. We talked about it and his mobile therapist talked to him. She told him hate is too strong...just stay away and realized that you don't have to like everyone...but that doesn't mean you have to hate!Well, we went to church today...my said stayed away from her ....but later my friend (the mom) came over and told me that her daughter was

upset ...she said my son texted her and said "F" you. UGH! My son said and does all the wrong things when he is upset and angry. I guess teens do that....but it always seems like it happens to my son.I am embarrassed, mortified and felt a little hurt that my friend didnt' realize how hurt my son was....he was deeply hurt by his daughter...they had been friends since he was 2 years old. I sat in church and cried....Do any of you feel like this or am I so sensitive and worry too much!Help!Jan

[Guest guest]

Perfectly put!!!!

Robin

From: jrushen <jrushen (DOT) com>Subject: ( ) Teens are so difficult Date: Sunday, January 25, 2009, 2:15 PM

My son asked my girlfriend's daughter an inappropriate question in church....he just wanted to prove everyone else wrong...that what they were saying about her was Wrong....but of course, she took it the wrong way...she said she my son said it out loud and my son said he whispered it. My son then said he didn't...he whispered it. And, then he told us that she told him she Hated him and he was annoying. And, when he asked her to say hello to her brother for him...she said no. So, my son told me in the car that he hates her and doesn't care about her anymore. We talked about it and his mobile therapist talked to him. She told him hate is too strong...just stay away and realized that you don't have to like everyone...but that doesn't mean you have to hate!Well, we went to church today...my said stayed away from her ....but later my friend (the mom) came over and told me that her daughter was

upset ...she said my son texted her and said "F" you. UGH! My son said and does all the wrong things when he is upset and angry. I guess teens do that....but it always seems like it happens to my son.I am embarrassed, mortified and felt a little hurt that my friend didnt' realize how hurt my son was....he was deeply hurt by his daughter...they had been friends since he was 2 years old. I sat in church and cried....Do any of you feel like this or am I so sensitive and worry too much!Help!Jan

[Guest guest]

Pam...thanks....this is really hard! My minister tells me ...to remember that I am doing the best that I can...and that I am not alone...I have my church friends and you guys. Thanks

Janice Rushen

"I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope"

From: ppanda65@... <ppanda65@...>Subject: Re: ( ) Teens are so difficult Date: Monday, January 26, 2009, 9:36 AM

I had to parent my now 18 year old with Asperger's very differently than I thought. He really challenged me to the core, but we did come out the other side. He is still very difficult, but he has matured and loosened a little bit. Pam

A Good Credit Score is 700 or Above. See yours in just 2 easy steps!

[Guest guest]

Thanks...my son is just starting the teen years ...13...and 7th grade. i worry so much about high school. He already has a girlfriend ....and she came over this weekend. Of course we kept a close eye on them and he did have some other male friends over. But he gets so angry and doens't think first...I think a lot has to do with low fustration levels and also from always being picked on and his low self-esteem. He says I nag him...which I guess I do...but if I didn't nothing would get done. I feel like I can't even talk to him.

thanks for the input....it gives me HOPE!

Jan

Janice Rushen

"I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope"

From: daffymom <daffymom@...>Subject: ( ) Re: Teens are so difficult Date: Monday, January 26, 2009, 8:45 AM

Jan,I haven't been able to follow the group on a regular basis, so I don'tremember how old you son is. Mine is now 19 and if yours is anythinglike mine, things WILL get better. Until his junior year of HS, my sonwas in trouble all of the time and that included inappropriate remarksto girls. He now goes to the local community college, he has a groupof friends with whom he has started to hang with, and he is actuallygoing to ask a young later (she is older-- is 20 already) out for V-Day. Until this last summer, I did not have to worry about him sending textmessages in anger as I blocked all text messages until he startedcollege-- now he pays for an unlimited use plan since she texts azillion messages a month.Debbi in SO CA>> My son asked my girlfriend's daughter an inappropriate question in > church....he just wanted to prove everyone else wrong...that what > they were saying about her was Wrong....but of course, she took it > the wrong way...she said she my son said it out loud and my son said > he whispered it. My son then said he didn't...he whispered it. And, > then he told us that she told him she Hated him and he was annoying. > And, when he asked her to say hello to her brother for him...she said > no. So, my son told me in the car that he hates her and doesn't care > about her anymore. We talked about it and his mobile therapist talked > to him. She told him hate is too strong...just stay away and > realized that you don't have to like everyone...but that doesn't mean > you have to hate!> > Well, we went to church today...my said stayed away from her

.....but > later my friend (the mom) came over and told me that her daughter was > upset ...she said my son texted her and said "F" you. UGH! My son > said and does all the wrong things when he is upset and angry. I > guess teens do that....but it always seems like it happens to my son.> > I am embarrassed, mortified and felt a little hurt that my friend > didnt' realize how hurt my son was....he was deeply hurt by his > daughter...they had been friends since he was 2 years old. I sat in > church and cried....> > Do any of you feel like this or am I so sensitive and worry too much!> Help!> > Jan>

[Guest guest]

You are probably right....I should be grateful that he is going to confirmation classes and staying in church...I guess I was pushing a little too hard with the youth group...I just thought it would be good for him to be with other teens....but I don't think I am going to push it. As far as getting him to go...I think I could get him to make the hoagies ....his father made two round trips to pick up his girlfriend this past weekend...so I would think he could do something for us.....I want him to learn to help others.

Thanks!

Jan

Janice Rushen

"I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope"

From: jrushen <jrushen (DOT) com>Subject: ( ) Teens are so difficult Date: Sunday, January 25, 2009, 2:15 PM

My son asked my girlfriend's daughter an inappropriate question in church....he just wanted to prove everyone else wrong...that what they were saying about her was Wrong....but of course, she took it the wrong way...she said she my son said it out loud and my son said he whispered it. My son then said he didn't...he whispered it. And, then he told us that she told him she Hated him and he was annoying. And, when he asked her to say hello to her brother for him...she said no. So, my son told me in the car that he hates her and doesn't care about her anymore. We talked about it and his mobile therapist talked to him. She told him hate is too strong...just stay away and realized that you don't have to like everyone...but that doesn't mean you have to hate!Well, we went to church today...my said stayed away from her ....but later my friend (the mom) came over and told me that her daughter was

upset ...she said my son texted her and said "F" you. UGH! My son said and does all the wrong things when he is upset and angry. I guess teens do that....but it always seems like it happens to my son.I am embarrassed, mortified and felt a little hurt that my friend didnt' realize how hurt my son was....he was deeply hurt by his daughter...they had been friends since he was 2 years old. I sat in church and cried....Do any of you feel like this or am I so sensitive and worry too much!Help!Jan

[Guest guest]

What are his future plans, Pam?

RoxannaYou're UniqueJust like everyone else...

Re: ( ) Teens are so difficult

I had to parent my now 18 year old with Asperger's very differently than I thought. He really challenged me to the core, but we did come out the other side. He is still very difficult, but he has matured and loosened a little bit. Pam

A Good Credit Score is 700 or Above. See yours in just 2 easy steps!

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[Guest guest]

Jan, you might have to go along as a chaperone to get him to go. That is the only way I woud get my 12 yo to go, I think, unless he knew someone or they were doing something he liked.

RoxannaYou're UniqueJust like everyone else...

( ) Teens are so difficult Date: Sunday, January 25, 2009, 2:15 PM

My son asked my girlfriend's daughter an inappropriate question in church....he just wanted to prove everyone else wrong...that what they were saying about her was Wrong....but of course, she took it the wrong way...she said she my son said it out loud and my son said he whispered it. My son then said he didn't...he whispered it. And, then he told us that she told him she Hated him and he was annoying. And, when he asked her to say hello to her brother for him...she said no. So, my son told me in the car that he hates her and doesn't care about her anymore. We talked about it and his mobile therapist talked to him. She told him hate is too strong...just stay away and realized that you don't have to like everyone...but that doesn't mean you have to hate!Well, we went to church today...my said stayed away from her ....but later my friend (the mom) came over and told me that her daughter was upset ...she said my son texted her and said "F" you. UGH! My son said and does all the wrong things when he is upset and angry. I guess teens do that....but it always seems like it happens to my son.I am embarrassed, mortified and felt a little hurt that my friend didnt' realize how hurt my son was....he was deeply hurt by his daughter...they had been friends since he was 2 years old. I sat in church and cried....Do any of you feel like this or am I so sensitive and worry too much!Help!Jan

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[Guest guest]

Sometimes we have to nag or it won't happen. Just say, "Yep, I am nagging...now get it done!" lol...

RoxannaYou're UniqueJust like everyone else...

( ) Re: Teens are so difficult Date: Monday, January 26, 2009, 8:45 AM

Jan,I haven't been able to follow the group on a regular basis, so I don'tremember how old you son is. Mine is now 19 and if yours is anythinglike mine, things WILL get better. Until his junior year of HS, my sonwas in trouble all of the time and that included inappropriate remarksto girls. He now goes to the local community college, he has a groupof friends with whom he has started to hang with, and he is actuallygoing to ask a young later (she is older-- is 20 already) out for V-Day. Until this last summer, I did not have to worry about him sending textmessages in anger as I blocked all text messages until he startedcollege-- now he pays for an unlimited use plan since she texts azillion messages a month.Debbi in SO CA>> My son asked my girlfriend's daughter an inappropriate question in > church....he just wanted to prove everyone else wrong...that what > they were saying about her was Wrong....but of course, she took it > the wrong way...she said she my son said it out loud and my son said > he whispered it. My son then said he didn't...he whispered it. And, > then he told us that she told him she Hated him and he was annoying. > And, when he asked her to say hello to her brother for him...she said > no. So, my son told me in the car that he hates her and doesn't care > about her anymore. We talked about it and his mobile therapist talked > to him. She told him hate is too strong...just stay away and > realized that you don't have to like everyone...but that doesn't mean > you have to hate!> > Well, we went to church today...my said stayed away from her ....but > later my friend (the mom) came over and told me that her daughter was > upset ...she said my son texted her and said "F" you. UGH! My son > said and does all the wrong things when he is upset and angry. I > guess teens do that....but it always seems like it happens to my son.> > I am embarrassed, mortified and felt a little hurt that my friend > didnt' realize how hurt my son was....he was deeply hurt by his > daughter...they had been friends since he was 2 years old. I sat in > church and cried....> > Do any of you feel like this or am I so sensitive and worry too much!> Help!> > Jan>

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[Guest guest]

His plans are to go to college and get his degree in Music Education. He wants to be a college level music teacher. Pam

In a message dated 1/31/2009 11:38:28 P.M. Eastern Standard Time, madideas@... writes:

What are his future plans, Pam?

RoxannaYou're UniqueJust like everyone else...

Re: ( ) Teens are so difficult

I had to parent my now 18 year old with Asperger's very differently than I thought. He really challenged me to the core, but we did come out the other side. He is still very difficult, but he has matured and loosened a little bit. Pam

A Good Credit Score is 700 or Above. See yours in just 2 easy steps!

No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.com Version: 8.0.176 / Virus Database: 270.10.13/1916 - Release Date: 1/26/2009 7:08 AM

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[Guest guest]

Wow, how exciting! That is good he has a goal too!

RoxannaYou're UniqueJust like everyone else...

Re: ( ) Teens are so difficult

I had to parent my now 18 year old with Asperger's very differently than I thought. He really challenged me to the core, but we did come out the other side. He is still very difficult, but he has matured and loosened a little bit. Pam

A Good Credit Score is 700 or Above. See yours in just 2 easy steps!

No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.com Version: 8.0.176 / Virus Database: 270.10.13/1916 - Release Date: 1/26/2009 7:08 AM

Great Deals on Dell Laptops. Starting at $499.

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[Guest guest]

Thanks Roxanna...you are so right and so correct...your input is wonderful! Thank you for all you do and say!

Jan

Hugs!

Janice Rushen

"I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope"

From: daffymom <daffymom (DOT) com>Subject: ( ) Re: Teens are so difficult Date: Monday, January 26, 2009, 8:45 AM

Jan,I haven't been able to follow the group on a regular basis, so I don'tremember how old you son is. Mine is now 19 and if yours is anythinglike mine, things WILL get better. Until his junior year of HS, my sonwas in trouble all of the time and that included inappropriate remarksto girls. He now goes to the local community college, he has a groupof friends with whom he has started to hang with, and he is actuallygoing to ask a young later (she is older-- is 20 already) out for V-Day. Until this last summer, I did not have to worry about him sending textmessages in anger as I blocked all text messages until he startedcollege-- now he pays for an unlimited use plan since she texts azillion messages a month.Debbi in SO CA>> My son asked my girlfriend's daughter an inappropriate question in > church....he just wanted to prove everyone else wrong...that what > they were saying about her was Wrong....but of course, she took it > the wrong way...she said she my son said it out loud and my son said > he whispered it. My son then said he didn't...he whispered it. And, > then he told us that she told him she Hated him and he was annoying. > And, when he asked her to say hello to her brother for him...she said > no. So, my son told me in the car that he hates her and doesn't care > about her anymore. We talked about it and his mobile therapist talked > to him. She told him hate is too strong...just stay away and > realized that you don't have to like everyone...but that doesn't mean > you have to hate!> > Well, we went to church today...my said stayed away from her

.....but > later my friend (the mom) came over and told me that her daughter was > upset ...she said my son texted her and said "F" you. UGH! My son > said and does all the wrong things when he is upset and angry. I > guess teens do that....but it always seems like it happens to my son.> > I am embarrassed, mortified and felt a little hurt that my friend > didnt' realize how hurt my son was....he was deeply hurt by his > daughter...they had been friends since he was 2 years old. I sat in > church and cried....> > Do any of you feel like this or am I so sensitive and worry too much!> Help!> > Jan>

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At church today He told one of the leaders he would go...of course to me he said he might go....but I am going to ask that she call and reaffirm that he is going....I don't think he wants me to go....maybe his dad...but not me....He doesn't even like me talking to his friends (Ha ha). His friends all like me....but he makes these faces at him...so what I do is totally ignore him when we are out together. One day he will get over it.

Now in church today we had communion. They passed everything out. got his juice and drank it right away....the guy behind him tapped him on the shoulder...but Dave the Pastor and leader of the confirmation class was sitting right there and he leaned over and seemed to be explaining. Everyone at church is wonderufl...no cirticizing. And, my son goes. He fought us today....but he went and stayed.

Jan

Janice Rushen

"I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope"

From: jrushen <jrushen (DOT) com>Subject: ( ) Teens are so difficult Date: Sunday, January 25, 2009, 2:15 PM

My son asked my girlfriend's daughter an inappropriate question in church....he just wanted to prove everyone else wrong...that what they were saying about her was Wrong....but of course, she took it the wrong way...she said she my son said it out loud and my son said he whispered it. My son then said he didn't...he whispered it. And, then he told us that she told him she Hated him and he was annoying. And, when he asked her to say hello to her brother for him...she said no. So, my son told me in the car that he hates her and doesn't care about her anymore. We talked about it and his mobile therapist talked to him. She told him hate is too strong...just stay away and realized that you don't have to like everyone...but that doesn't mean you have to hate!Well, we went to church today...my said stayed away from her ....but later my friend (the mom) came over and told me that her daughter was

upset ...she said my son texted her and said "F" you. UGH! My son said and does all the wrong things when he is upset and angry. I guess teens do that....but it always seems like it happens to my son.I am embarrassed, mortified and felt a little hurt that my friend didnt' realize how hurt my son was....he was deeply hurt by his daughter...they had been friends since he was 2 years old. I sat in church and cried....Do any of you feel like this or am I so sensitive and worry too much!Help!Jan

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