Re: introduction (Marilyn)

[Guest guest]

Hi Marilyn, I was just wondering if at any time OCD (obsessive-

compulsive disorder) has been mentioned as a possibility? Just

asking as even tough obsessive tendencies and rituals can be strong

for some on the autism spectrum, there is also OCD itself which can

trigger a lot of behaviors. I have a 19 yr old son with Aspergers

and with OCD, which is an anxiety disorder.

Why do you think the online school may not work?

Has he been on any SSRI/antidepressant type meds?

>

> Hi,

>

> I am new to this list. My son turned 14 last week and received an

> educational diagnosis (to qualify for services at school) of

> asperger's 2 years ago when he was in 7th grade.

>

> His primary issues are school avoidance, anxiety, black & white

> thinking, inflexibility, very strong food preferences (which

change,

[Guest guest]

Hi Marilyn,

when my now 19 yo ds (hfa, dyslexia) could not attend high school any longer (it was too big for him too, among some other problems), we had the school supply a tutor for him. He took the last two years of school via tutoring twice a week at the library. He actually ended up doing very good work, getting good grades and really learning, for a change. So it turned from a horrible experience to a really positive one.

As for e-schooling, you really will probably need to help him stay organized. I don't know his specific educational needs but they are still there and he will need help from you. I thought I could just put my kid (my other ds, 12 yo, hfa) on "go" and leave the room and he would do his work but nooooooooooooo, that hope vanished fast. I am very heavily involved with all his classes, have to make him lists to check off, help him chunk larger assignments, force him to study and read most of the time. It's very time consuming!! Now, your ds may need much less help. But this is what I do now with mine. If I did not do all this, he would not get most everything done at all. He is not a self starter and he doesn't care if he learns anything either.

As for his behavior, you might consider getting a complete eval at the larger hospital you mention. It might give you some helpful ideas or it might help you meet people who know people who can be helpful. He may need new or different meds. He may need some kind of counseling work on ways to handle his anger, anxiety and self control regulation.

Good luck! We are all here!

RoxannaYou're UniqueJust like everyone else...

( ) introduction (Marilyn)

Hi,I am new to this list. My son turned 14 last week and received an educational diagnosis (to qualify for services at school) of asperger's 2 years ago when he was in 7th grade.His primary issues are school avoidance, anxiety, black & white thinking, inflexibility, very strong food preferences (which change, and meeting them are crucial to his being able to cope each day), strong aversion to in-home dental care (although he is gettting dental office cleanings 4x/year and brushing daily now if I pay him $1 each time), depression, and sometimes uncontrollable anger.He skipped first grade so is a year younger than his classmates. He attended school regularly grades K-5 except for missing one month in 5th grade. He missed 30% of 6th, 40% of 7th, 60% of 8th. This year he went to high school the first 4 days and then said (articulating the problem very well), "I can't go to this high school. It's too big for me." It's taken 2 months but he is now registered at an online school and I am hoping he will start classes next week, but concerned that may not work either. I am very concerned about him getting an education. His counselor has recommended that I apply for social security for him.He has been in counseling and on meds the last 2.5 years. They have helped but in many ways the issues are all still the same, so I am taking a step back and wondering if we should be considering a different approach. We live in a small town and I am wondering if the resources here are not experienced enough with these issues to help him. I'm considering getting him evaluated at the medical school in Portland (which hypothetically is bigger and offers more options) to get some more specific advice about what might help him.Recently the overwhelming anger has resurfaced which is another major concern; he is now as big as I am so I can't hold him and soothe him until it subsides anymore. Meds helped with this before and I'm hoping will help again; I think he is just so uncomfortable he doesn't know what to do and eventually explodes.If you have any ideas you think might help us, I'd very much appreciate hearing about them. Thank youMarilyn

No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.com Version: 8.0.175 / Virus Database: 270.9.9/1808 - Release Date: 11/23/2008 6:59 PM

[Guest guest]

Hi

The only way OCD has come up is when his counselor has talked about

the overlap between depression, anxiety, and OCD, like 3 linked

circles. Is there a particular reason you bring it up? It's an

interesting idea I hadn't thought of regarding his computer use; I

don't know very much about it.

My concern about the online school is that he hasn't really been

able to follow through with things at all, and as Roxanne said, it

will require some self management skills I don't think he has.

He has been on prozac and one other med for 2 years. The other med

was first Risperdal which worked great but caused weight gain, then

Abilify which also caused weight gain, now Geodon.

Thank you for your support.

Marilyn

> >

> > Hi,

> >

> > I am new to this list. My son turned 14 last week and received

an

> > educational diagnosis (to qualify for services at school) of

> > asperger's 2 years ago when he was in 7th grade.

> >

> > His primary issues are school avoidance, anxiety, black & white

> > thinking, inflexibility, very strong food preferences (which

> change,

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks for sharing your story, Roxanne.

With the tutor, was your son able to complete all his requirements

for a high school degree? And was that acceptable for applying for

college, if that was his next step? What is he doing now?

I share your concerns about his ability to manage the work without

someone working with him locally, and I have to be away at work for

the bulk of the day, so if what I can do with him a couple hours a

day is not enough, we'll be looking at something else.

>It might give you some helpful ideas or it might help you meet

people who know people who can be helpful.

This is a particularly helpful idea I hadn't thought of.

The psychiatrist thinks getting the eval locally will be a better

fit for my son, that the multi-interviewer eval will be too much for

him. I'm still on the fence about it.

We did agree Monday to increase his meds, though he is still stuck

(doesn't like change, got mad the psychiatrist was 2 minutes over so

is rejecting anything to do with her, or something) so we haven't

started it yet. I'm hoping we'll have a moment the next few days

when he becomes open to it and then the meds will start helping.

Marilyn

>

> Hi Marilyn,

> when my now 19 yo ds (hfa, dyslexia) could not attend high school

any longer (it was too big for him too, among some other problems),

we had the school supply a tutor for him. He took the last two

years of school via tutoring twice a week at the library. He

actually ended up doing very good work, getting good grades and

really learning, for a change. So it turned from a horrible

experience to a really positive one.

>

> As for e-schooling, you really will probably need to help him stay

organized. I don't know his specific educational needs but they are

still there and he will need help from you. I thought I could just

put my kid (my other ds, 12 yo, hfa) on " go " and leave the room and

he would do his work but nooooooooooooo, that hope vanished fast. I

am very heavily involved with all his classes, have to make him

lists to check off, help him chunk larger assignments, force him to

study and read most of the time. It's very time consuming!! Now,

your ds may need much less help. But this is what I do now with

mine. If I did not do all this, he would not get most everything

done at all. He is not a self starter and he doesn't care if he

learns anything either.

>

> As for his behavior, you might consider getting a complete eval at

the larger hospital you mention. It might give you some helpful

ideas or it might help you meet people who know people who can be

helpful. He may need new or different meds. He may need some kind

of counseling work on ways to handle his anger, anxiety and self

control regulation.

>

> Good luck! We are all here!

>

>

>

> Roxanna

> You're Unique

> Just like everyone else...

> ( ) introduction (Marilyn)

>

>

> Hi,

>

> I am new to this list. My son turned 14 last week and received

an

> educational diagnosis (to qualify for services at school) of

> asperger's 2 years ago when he was in 7th grade.

>

> His primary issues are school avoidance, anxiety, black & white

> thinking, inflexibility, very strong food preferences (which

change,

> and meeting them are crucial to his being able to cope each

day),

> strong aversion to in-home dental care (although he is gettting

> dental office cleanings 4x/year and brushing daily now if I pay

him

> $1 each time), depression, and sometimes uncontrollable anger.

>

> He skipped first grade so is a year younger than his classmates.

He

> attended school regularly grades K-5 except for missing one

month in

> 5th grade. He missed 30% of 6th, 40% of 7th, 60% of 8th. This

year

> he went to high school the first 4 days and then said

(articulating

> the problem very well), " I can't go to this high school. It's

too

> big for me. " It's taken 2 months but he is now registered at an

> online school and I am hoping he will start classes next week,

but

> concerned that may not work either. I am very concerned about

him

> getting an education. His counselor has recommended that I apply

for

> social security for him.

>

> He has been in counseling and on meds the last 2.5 years. They

have

> helped but in many ways the issues are all still the same, so I

am

> taking a step back and wondering if we should be considering a

> different approach. We live in a small town and I am wondering

if

> the resources here are not experienced enough with these issues

to

> help him. I'm considering getting him evaluated at the medical

> school in Portland (which hypothetically is bigger and offers

more

> options) to get some more specific advice about what might help

him.

>

> Recently the overwhelming anger has resurfaced which is another

> major concern; he is now as big as I am so I can't hold him and

> soothe him until it subsides anymore. Meds helped with this

before

> and I'm hoping will help again; I think he is just so

uncomfortable

> he doesn't know what to do and eventually explodes.

>

> If you have any ideas you think might help us, I'd very much

> appreciate hearing about them. Thank you

>

> Marilyn

>

>

>

>

>

>

> -------------------------------------------------------------------

-----------

>

>

>

> No virus found in this incoming message.

> Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.com

> Version: 8.0.175 / Virus Database: 270.9.9/1808 - Release Date:

11/23/2008 6:59 PM

>

[Guest guest]

Wow...my son is 13 and in 7th....he has anger issues at home...I usually let him hash it out in his room...if he starts banging things I go in and take away the important or unsafe stuff. I close the door and let him be. I don't bother him until he comes out. He usually is calm by then.

I had him on risperdal for a while but didn't see a difference and everyone talked about weight gain...so we weaned him off. He is on prozac and adderall.....he would not be able to focus if he wasn't on adderall.

Jan

Janice Rushen

"I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope"

From: marilyn_from_oregon <marilyn@...>Subject: Re: ( ) introduction (Marilyn) Date: Wednesday, November 26, 2008, 12:24 PM

Thanks for sharing your story, Roxanne.With the tutor, was your son able to complete all his requirements for a high school degree? And was that acceptable for applying for college, if that was his next step? What is he doing now?I share your concerns about his ability to manage the work without someone working with him locally, and I have to be away at work for the bulk of the day, so if what I can do with him a couple hours a day is not enough, we'll be looking at something else.>It might give you some helpful ideas or it might help you meet people who know people who can be helpful.This is a particularly helpful idea I hadn't thought of.The psychiatrist thinks getting the eval locally will be a better fit for my son, that the multi-interviewer eval will be too much for him. I'm still on the fence about it.We did agree Monday to increase his meds, though he is still

stuck (doesn't like change, got mad the psychiatrist was 2 minutes over so is rejecting anything to do with her, or something) so we haven't started it yet. I'm hoping we'll have a moment the next few days when he becomes open to it and then the meds will start helping.Marilyn>> Hi Marilyn,> when my now 19 yo ds (hfa, dyslexia) could not attend high school any longer (it was too big for him too, among some other problems), we had the school supply a tutor for him. He took the last two years of school via tutoring twice a week at the library. He actually ended up doing very good work, getting good grades and really learning, for a change. So it turned from a horrible experience to a really positive one. >

> As for e-schooling, you really will probably need to help him stay organized. I don't know his specific educational needs but they are still there and he will need help from you. I thought I could just put my kid (my other ds, 12 yo, hfa) on "go" and leave the room and he would do his work but nooooooooooooo, that hope vanished fast. I am very heavily involved with all his classes, have to make him lists to check off, help him chunk larger assignments, force him to study and read most of the time. It's very time consuming!! Now, your ds may need much less help. But this is what I do now with mine. If I did not do all this, he would not get most everything done at all. He is not a self starter and he doesn't care if he learns anything either. > > As for his behavior, you might consider getting a complete eval at the larger hospital you mention. It might give you some helpful ideas

or it might help you meet people who know people who can be helpful. He may need new or different meds. He may need some kind of counseling work on ways to handle his anger, anxiety and self control regulation. > > Good luck! We are all here!> > > > Roxanna> You're Unique> Just like everyone else...> ( ) introduction (Marilyn)> > > Hi,> > I am new to this list. My son turned 14 last week and received an > educational diagnosis (to qualify for services at school) of > asperger's 2 years ago when he was in 7th grade.> > His primary issues are

school avoidance, anxiety, black & white > thinking, inflexibility, very strong food preferences (which change, > and meeting them are crucial to his being able to cope each day), > strong aversion to in-home dental care (although he is gettting > dental office cleanings 4x/year and brushing daily now if I pay him > $1 each time), depression, and sometimes uncontrollable anger.> > He skipped first grade so is a year younger than his classmates. He > attended school regularly grades K-5 except for missing one month in > 5th grade. He missed 30% of 6th, 40% of 7th, 60% of 8th. This year > he went to high school the first 4 days and then said (articulating > the problem very well), "I can't go to this high school. It's too > big for me." It's taken 2 months but he is now registered at an > online school and I am hoping he will

start classes next week, but > concerned that may not work either. I am very concerned about him > getting an education. His counselor has recommended that I apply for > social security for him.> > He has been in counseling and on meds the last 2.5 years. They have > helped but in many ways the issues are all still the same, so I am > taking a step back and wondering if we should be considering a > different approach. We live in a small town and I am wondering if > the resources here are not experienced enough with these issues to > help him. I'm considering getting him evaluated at the medical > school in Portland (which hypothetically is bigger and offers more > options) to get some more specific advice about what might help him.> > Recently the overwhelming anger has resurfaced which is another > major concern;

he is now as big as I am so I can't hold him and > soothe him until it subsides anymore. Meds helped with this before > and I'm hoping will help again; I think he is just so uncomfortable > he doesn't know what to do and eventually explodes.> > If you have any ideas you think might help us, I'd very much > appreciate hearing about them. Thank you> > Marilyn> > > > > > > ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ------------> > > > No virus found in this incoming message.> Checked by AVG - http://www.avg. com > Version: 8.0.175 / Virus Database: 270.9.9/1808 - Release Date: 11/23/2008 6:59 PM>

[Guest guest]

Yes, he finished high school with all his credits to graduate. We did postponed his diploma for two years so he can go to a 2 year computer program at our local career center. He is in the 2nd year of that right now. He is doing so great in this program. He already has two professional certifications completed and he made the honor roll again this past quarter. I don't know if he will go to college next or what he will do really. He could definitely go to college - having the requirements met to go, I mean. But I'm not sure if he can manage it otherwise. He still isn't driving either.

Meds are tough when they get older - well, for us this has been true. They start having their own opinion. lol. My older ds decided he wasn't taking any meds - the whole "Say no to drugs" campaign did it's damage to the literal mind. But he has tried some meds since, realizing he needs help getting to sleep, for instance.

I hope you can sort the meds out.

I think networking is the one big thing that helps and it's the hardest to do because we have limited free time already and are exhausted with taking care of our kids. But the new people might have good ideas, programs, other therapists and docs to recommend. Can't hurt. Let us know what you decide!

Hang in there!

RoxannaYou're UniqueJust like everyone else...

( ) introduction (Marilyn)> > > Hi,> > I am new to this list. My son turned 14 last week and received an > educational diagnosis (to qualify for services at school) of > asperger's 2 years ago when he was in 7th grade.> > His primary issues are school avoidance, anxiety, black & white > thinking, inflexibility, very strong food preferences (which change, > and meeting them are crucial to his being able to cope each day), > strong aversion to in-home dental care (although he is gettting > dental office cleanings 4x/year and brushing daily now if I pay him > $1 each time), depression, and sometimes uncontrollable anger.> > He skipped first grade so is a year younger than his classmates. He > attended school regularly grades K-5 except for missing one month in > 5th grade. He missed 30% of 6th, 40% of 7th, 60% of 8th. This year > he went to high school the first 4 days and then said (articulating > the problem very well), "I can't go to this high school. It's too > big for me." It's taken 2 months but he is now registered at an > online school and I am hoping he will start classes next week, but > concerned that may not work either. I am very concerned about him > getting an education. His counselor has recommended that I apply for > social security for him.> > He has been in counseling and on meds the last 2.5 years. They have > helped but in many ways the issues are all still the same, so I am > taking a step back and wondering if we should be considering a > different approach. We live in a small town and I am wondering if > the resources here are not experienced enough with these issues to > help him. I'm considering getting him evaluated at the medical > school in Portland (which hypothetically is bigger and offers more > options) to get some more specific advice about what might help him.> > Recently the overwhelming anger has resurfaced which is another > major concern; he is now as big as I am so I can't hold him and > soothe him until it subsides anymore. Meds helped with this before > and I'm hoping will help again; I think he is just so uncomfortable > he doesn't know what to do and eventually explodes.> > If you have any ideas you think might help us, I'd very much > appreciate hearing about them. Thank you> > Marilyn> > > > > > > ---------------------------------------------------------------------> > > > No virus found in this incoming message.> Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.com > Version: 8.0.175 / Virus Database: 270.9.9/1808 - Release Date: 11/23/2008 6:59 PM>

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[Guest guest]

Marilyn,

One thing I do for my 12 yo regarding the e-school is I write him a daily list of assignments. I print up a daily list for him with places to check things off as he gets them done. For one reason, he is really stressed out if he doesn't know "how much longer" he has to do things. He likes seeing what we have to do. If you are not home, you could try the checklist out. It does take a little work on my part to assemble all the assignments and then print them out, but it does help us both keep it straight. You could help him finish whatever he didn't get done during the day each evening. But that will take your evening time, too. With our e-school, they usually let the child have up to one week to get assignments done. So if he has a test, we usually have one week from the day it's assigned to get it done and turned in. This is great for us because sometimes we are slow in getting things done each day. So if we get behind, I don't have to panic. I'm not sure how your eschool will do things. But they might be flexible so that if he doesn't get something done right away, you still have time to do it. I also like that we can do things anytime, day or night. If we miss an e-class, for instance, we can listen to the class later. All classes are put in an archive for that. It does really help.

RoxannaYou're UniqueJust like everyone else...

( ) Re: introduction (Marilyn)

Hi The only way OCD has come up is when his counselor has talked about the overlap between depression, anxiety, and OCD, like 3 linked circles. Is there a particular reason you bring it up? It's an interesting idea I hadn't thought of regarding his computer use; I don't know very much about it.My concern about the online school is that he hasn't really been able to follow through with things at all, and as Roxanne said, it will require some self management skills I don't think he has.He has been on prozac and one other med for 2 years. The other med was first Risperdal which worked great but caused weight gain, then Abilify which also caused weight gain, now Geodon.Thank you for your support.Marilyn> >> > Hi,> > > > I am new to this list. My son turned 14 last week and received an > > educational diagnosis (to qualify for services at school) of > > asperger's 2 years ago when he was in 7th grade.> > > > His primary issues are school avoidance, anxiety, black & white > > thinking, inflexibility, very strong food preferences (which > change,>

No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.com Version: 8.0.175 / Virus Database: 270.9.10/1813 - Release Date: 11/26/2008 8:53 AM

[Guest guest]

Thanks, Roxanne. The school my son will be at is Connections Academy.

Still no luck on the meds. He got overwhelmed on Thanksgiving (very

low key, just us and my parents and their dog, who my son enjoys) and

got stuck again, has been happening a lot lately. Will keep at it.

Every hard time makes it more clear to me that that's what's up; his

body has changed so his meds aren't working as well any more.

Thanks for listening and for the support.

Marilyn

[Guest guest]

Hi Marilyn, I mentioned OCD as some issues are things kids with OCD

can also have problems with - due to OCD. Although there can be

other causes too, even just the teenage puberty/moods.

School avoidance is something OCD sometimes causes, not uncommon.

Inflexibility. The food choice problem, which can change you said,

and seems to be " crucial " for that day. And anger. The tricky part

here is having to find out *if* there is OCD causing any of this.

Of course with school, it might be Aspergers/sensory and that it is

too big for him. Or it could be social anxiety. Or OCD related.

Like I said, can be tricky to pick out the cause. With my Aspie/OCD

so, I have to pick/nag details out of him sometimes, asking to get an

answer and sometimes he can't say " why. "

Prozac is a med that is used for OCD. The range of dose to treat OCD

in children is 5mg to 60mg. (For some it takes a little, others a

lot)

Anyway, since so many diagnoses seem to sometimes occur together

(comorbid), some things you mentioned just had me wondering about OCD

as a possibility.

Some sites for info, and not just about OCD:

http://www.tourettesyndrome.net/

http://www.schoolbehavior.com/

http://www.ocfoundation.org/ocd-in-children.html

>

> Hi

>

> The only way OCD has come up is when his counselor has talked about

> the overlap between depression, anxiety, and OCD, like 3 linked

> circles. Is there a particular reason you bring it up? It's an

[Guest guest]

Thanks, Aleshia. Forgive me if you already know this, but in case

it's helpful to you or someone: Weight loss is more an effect of a

stimulant like Adderall (for ADHD, which my son doesn't have).

Weight gain is a side effect of Risperdal and Abilify, which my son

took for anxiety. He is 14, 5'6 " and 190#.

What does the " full check up " consist of? My kids got full exams

(mostly blood work to rule out nutritional deficiencies, thyroid

issues, etc) at time of diagnosis but nothing since except one when

food issues were prominent so we checked for glucose issues.

Have you been using the " write out the assignments each morning "

approach for a long time so they expect it? Did it take a while for

them to get used to it?

thanks for your help

Marilyn

>

> Dear Marilyn:

>

> I home school w/disc's from A Beka. We have the full program for

both of my boys. For both of my boys I write out each mornings

assignments on a note book sheet of plain paper. Each boy get's

to " SCRIBBLE IT DONE " and go on to the next subject. About

medication; I have my oldest son who will turn 15 in Dec. and he has

a great combination of meds. He is on Adderall 25 and Straterra

30. Both are given in the AM. Then a 10mg does of Adderall at 2:00

in the after noon. He is very tall and thin. Weight gain would be

a plus if he could just get some fat. he's 5'8 " and only 115. We

have a med check with our family doctor once every 6months and we

get the full check up. If this info helps, great. If not, see if

you doctor wants to discuss a change to these meds. Again, these

work for my son, but may not work for every kid with ADHD/PDD

(NOS)/Aspergers. Great day to you...Aleshia...ssterland@...

>