Re: Independence

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 4/16/02 2:24:16 AM Central Daylight Time,

writes:

>

> CK......good to hear from you. Glad Ian is home for a while. How do they

> get the kids so independent.....dressing wise, cutting food, etc? Do they

> forgo the education part till they master them? Did they ever put him on

> meds? Just curious. Donna.....glad you had fun at the party. Your

> family sounds like mine.....BIG!!!

> Joan.....aren't you going to a meeting the first weekend in May on the East

>

> coast? Where is it and is anyone else going? I remember thinking if I was

>

> 'free' perhaps I'd drive down and visit with some of the people from the

> digest. Take care, Everyone.

> Margaret

>

>

> Margaret,

> For 8 years I managed a group home for children with developmental

> disabilities. It is much easier to work on living skills when you have

> someone just to do the cooking and over night staff to do the bulk of the

> laundry. Oh yeah, and you get days off. The kids are also great role models

> for each other.

> Our whole focus was getting kids to do as much for themselves as possible.

> Academics was focused on in school during the day but we really worked on

> living skills whenever they were at home.

We started 12 and 13 year olds sorting and doing their own laundry. Every

child carried their own dish to the sink, rinsed it and put it in the

dishwasher. We also worked on all the showering and personal care skills.

Believe me, much easier when it is a job and you can go home at the end of

your shift.

Karyn

[Guest guest]

I completely agree with what you said below. That is the only way a person feels

complete, and a relationship is fulfilling and long lasting. Like I said before,

find stuff YOU love to do, and are good at.. FIND YOURSELF (which takes some

serious work).. and the rest WILL fall into place.

In a message dated 1/30/2003 7:18:19 PM Eastern Standard Time, mika93@...

writes:

> I guess my most practical

> recommendation is very basic: when you are in a relationship,

> maintain a rich and fulfilling social life that is separate

> from your

> partner (different friends, different activities).

[Guest guest]

Hoo rah bg,

This man really does speak the truth everyone, they are to simple to make. I

know a lot of you are just nervous because you want to make sure you make it

right, in order to get the best results. I felt the same way, but trust me if

you follow the directions it is very simple.

Independence

Bob Beck said " Take back your Power " from the medical establishment who

has had it for years and can ruin your health, your finances, etc.

He then proceded to give you plans for a device to build. It probably

was beyond most people's ability to do. So, most people just opted to

buy one. Fine. Then the companies making them got shut down, except

for one in Canada and they almost did. Another maker is now in jail.

Great.

So, I try to simplify these things more and more. That way you are not

dependent on others to make them for you, and if they go, you are stuck.

I know most people will feel sorry for the makers having trouble, and

some will even help in their legal defense. But there's not much

defense if you break the law. There's legislative effort, maybe change

the law, but truth is, most people aren't ready to abolish the medical

practice laws when you come right down to it, good or bad, that's the

law.

So, the device is down to a battery from the supermarket and a piece of

wire. There's no skill in building one of these. You are free.

I can't see how anyone would sell a piece of wire, and a battery.

Would you pay shipping on a 2lb battery that you can buy at your

supermarket? IF battery is not included, what would you pay for a

piece of wire with cloth wrapped around the ends? Wouldn't you want

your money back when you laid eyes on it? It's worth 1.59, the

shipping is five times that price. You can make one in 15 minutes

with scissors and a knife.

Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of people who should buy one!

they could screw up cream cheese and crackers. But...the legal issues

are so strongly compelling, and the knowledge so valuable, I tend to

think you really should bite the bullet and make one..

bG

The group's main page has a menu to the left, with photos of Godzilla devices

and info. This is a discussion, free speech forum, not medical advice. All

info is free to members. Membership is free, but by joing, you agree to hold

harmless the posters, including moderator, from damages from anything you find

here whether jointly, severally, or individually. We are interested in your

results, but cannot say anything about repeatability, or whether this might have

medical benefits. Thanks, for your understanding, good luck researching. --bG

[Guest guest]

Well bG, when you get all your $100 orders for the 'prentice Godzilla

remember that I would be more than willing to help you build them. At a

50/50 split of course. ;-)

samala

" tossed down to live among angels, who have forgotten what they are, I

strive to remember " RLV 1998

-------Original Message-------

Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of people who should buy one!

they could screw up cream cheese and crackers. But...the legal issues

are so strongly compelling, and the knowledge so valuable, I tend to

think you really should bite the bullet and make one..

[Guest guest]

Good. this type of feedback on how it went building the device is

extremely valuable. I will put more words of assurance that " you

cannot make a mistake building this " on our main page. Thanks,

, good feedback here. We can't get this message out if it's

running up against fear of getting it wrong.

bG

>

> Hoo rah bg,

>

> This man really does speak the truth everyone, they are to simple

to make. I know a lot of you are just nervous because you want to

make sure you make it right, in order to get the best results. I

felt the same way, but trust me if you follow the directions it is

very simple.

>

>

> ----- Original Message -----

>

[Guest guest]

Wow! That is super!!! Good for and yes that will help him mature....being with older teens...I know that helps my son.....just guys hanging with guys....he tells me all about their burps and farts...so digusting ...but boys are boys...it is just nice hearing him talk about it and how the older boy is being good to him.....like a big brother. I think this helped him let go some of his things....not "cool" to have baby things anymore. And, I think part of the problem was me....parting with his yoiunger day toys...oh...my child is no longer a baby...ha! ha! I do keep somethings and put them away.....for him when he grows up and maybe has kids of his own....like his the Tank train set or his Batman set of soft dolls that we got at the Warner Brothers store...who know they maybe worth something one day.....

Jan

Janice Rushen

Mom, Mentor, Wife, Teacher, Advocate, Accountant,

Maid, Taxi, Shopper, Bulletin Board Artist

Nanny, Crafter, Therapist, Friend, Sister, Aunt,

Daughter, Grand-daughter, Personal Care Aide,

Student, Believer, and Giver.

From: greenbirdocean <greenbirdocean@...>Subject: ( ) Independence Date: Friday, July 18, 2008, 1:16 AM

Absolutely when the kids start exercising their abilities independently, it is certainly a day to celebrate. I find I am very lucky that is lightly touched by AS, compared to many of the posts. Does he do a multitude of the characteristics. .. you betcha, I'm blessed that the level on the activity meter is on low. LOLAs to the cleansing o' the toys, I agree that he needs a little heads up, and we designated a box "for toys to give away, just not yet" and it is with that in mind that most of the 'stuff' was so deemed.. but I'm prepared for the worst.My mom rightly pointed out that if 'you take stuff out, ya gotta replace it... can't leave a vacuum!' gosh my mom is smart.I'm going shopping - yep, helping the economy out - for some new furniture and accessories for an 'office' and workroom. Working towards that more mature side of 10. As to camp... yes, I was concerned

that he would not take too well to it, but he has been there a time or two before for overnights, and with all the High school counselors, and young men there, a little extra dose of testosterone and manly men time might help him in the maturity department.. . nothin like a good ole 'burp off' to bring out the 'guy' in a kid. LOLHe has been there since Sunday, and I have a personal friend in the Nurse there and not a phone call yet to set up an extraction team!Score one more victory in the Independence column

[Guest guest]

There are going to be pros and cons to homeschooling him. I support homeschooling. Especially when bullies break a childs spirit! Public school is the norm, but more and more people are finding that the public school is not the best fit for them! People are going to criticize ANY decision you make. A real friend would listen and bring you up and tell you it's going to be rough but you can do anything you put your mind to! Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerryFrom: Jenn <WldWestWoman@...>Sender: Autism and Aspergers Treatment Date: Wed, 12 Jan 2011 16:21:47 -0700<Autism and Aspergers Treatment >Reply Autism and Aspergers Treatment Subject: Independence I am really worried about my son, who has Aspergers. Next year he will be in Jr. High, and I know emotionally he won't be ready for it. He is 12 years old, but acts more like he is about 8 years old. I have been seriously thinking about homeschooling, but haven't made a final decision yet, at least until I find out if the Jr. High here has any programs to help him. I am really worried about his sensory issues, including his fear of germs. He is already being picked on because of his fear of germs, and I know Jr. High will be much harder for him! My question is... how do we help our kids to become more independent, and less dependent on us? I keep having people tell me that I am being overprotective, and I need to let him grow up. I want him to start becoming more independent, but it is so hard when he is so clingy and unsure of himself. I keep wondering if I am being overprotective and that is why he is clingy. But on the other hand, he does have a more severe form of Aspergers. Is homeschooling probably the best option for him? Or is it just me being overprotective?I had a friend recently tell me that she doesn't think I have the fortitude to homeschool him, but she doesn't know how much I have thought this out. I know this would be a full-time job for me, and I would be sacrificing a lot to do this, but he is worth it. What are your thoughts?Thx!Jenn

[Guest guest]

The question you posed is how to we help our kids become more independent. My

answer is to teach them the skills they need to be more independent. Sounds

simple in theory but in practice it is quite tough when working with children

with learning differences. 1st you need to define what skills or current

challenges the child has that is impeding his independence. By looking at what

teaching method has worked in the past you will get insight on how to approach

teaching the new skill. Having adults that are consistent in the early stages

of learning skills/overcoming obstacles is essential. After the child has

demonstrated that they can do these things in a structured supportive

environment the next step would be to have the child try in the natural

environment with support standing on the sidelines to help the child should

they need it.

As far as people telling you you are being overprotective, ask them to explain

to you instances of when they thought you were overprotective, this will give

you insight into what you are doing. They may not see/understand your child's

areas of need and therefore are viewing you as overprotective or maybe you will

recollect these moments and see yourself as needing to step back somewhat..

When you make your list of your child's areas of need and how to re mediate be

sure to bring that to the IEP meeting with you.

As far as homeschooling: There are advantages and disadvantages to both. Make

sure you've looked at both clearly and objectively. It's a tough decision and

only you will be able to decide what's right for your little guy. Best of luck

in making these very tough decisions. Please keep us posted on your decisions.

>

> *I am really worried about my son, who has Aspergers. Next year he will be

> in Jr. High, and I know emotionally he won't be ready for it. He is 12 years

> old, but acts more like he is about 8 years old. I have been seriously

> thinking about homeschooling, but haven't made a final decision yet, at

> least until I find out if the Jr. High here has any programs to help him. I

> am really worried about his sensory issues, including his fear of germs. He

> is already being picked on because of his fear of germs, and I know Jr. High

> will be much harder for him! *

> *

> *

> *My question is... how do we help our kids to become more independent, and

> less dependent on us? I keep having people tell me that I am being

> overprotective, and I need to let him grow up. I want him to start becoming

> more independent, but it is so hard when he is so clingy and unsure of

> himself. I keep wondering if I am being overprotective and that is why he is

> clingy. But on the other hand, he does have a more severe form of Aspergers.

> Is homeschooling probably the best option for him? Or is it just me being

> overprotective?

>

> I had a friend recently tell me that she doesn't think I have the fortitude

> to homeschool him, but she doesn't know how much I have thought this out. I

> know this would be a full-time job for me, and I would be sacrificing a lot

> to do this, but he is worth it. What are your thoughts?*

> *

> *

> *Thx!*

> *Jenn*

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks everyone for your thoughts and great advice! I am going to see how the IEP meeting goes next week, before I think too much more about it. It's just hard when people keep telling me to not worry about next year, until next year. But when u have a child with Aspergers, u have to plan way in advance.

 

Jenn

On Thu, Jan 13, 2011 at 5:21 AM, Kim <kksarene@...> wrote:

 

Hi Jenn,I just joined the group yesterday, so this is my first post. My son with aspergers is 11 and started in the middle school last year. It was horrible! His teachers just did not understand and I kept getting calls and emails for behavior problems. He was not bullied, but the other kids just kind of stayed away from him. He was miserable! Luckily, I also just received my MS in Elem. Instruction and am continuing school to get my special ed license. I knew all the laws and went into the school this year completely armed. I demanded they give my son what he needs and they are required to give him by law. The school has an autism specialist who works with him now and a group of other kids with similar behavior issues. His current teacher also has a son with aspergers and she has been an absolutely angle for him. He is starting to like school more, talks to a few of the kids, and even received his first birthday party invitation this week! I actually cried with joy! If you're in a good district and can really advocate for your son, statistically he should do better being in an inclusive setting than being separated from his peers.

That being said, I also home schooled my son through 2nd and 3rd grade because where we were living at the time, the local school district was a mess. The principal of the school openly admitted to me they just did not have the resources to do what needed done.

I believe inclusion can work for many children, but you do need to be in a good, supportive school district, and you need to become educated on special ed law so you can advocate and get your son all he needs and deserves. Don't be afraid to be pushy! But in a respectful way.

Hope all this helps,Kim>> *I am really worried about my son, who has Aspergers. Next year he will be

> in Jr. High, and I know emotionally he won't be ready for it. He is 12 years> old, but acts more like he is about 8 years old. I have been seriously> thinking about homeschooling, but haven't made a final decision yet, at

> least until I find out if the Jr. High here has any programs to help him. I> am really worried about his sensory issues, including his fear of germs. He> is already being picked on because of his fear of germs, and I know Jr. High

> will be much harder for him! *> *> *> *My question is... how do we help our kids to become more independent, and> less dependent on us? I keep having people tell me that I am being> overprotective, and I need to let him grow up. I want him to start becoming

> more independent, but it is so hard when he is so clingy and unsure of> himself. I keep wondering if I am being overprotective and that is why he is> clingy. But on the other hand, he does have a more severe form of Aspergers.

> Is homeschooling probably the best option for him? Or is it just me being> overprotective?> > I had a friend recently tell me that she doesn't think I have the fortitude> to homeschool him, but she doesn't know how much I have thought this out. I

> know this would be a full-time job for me, and I would be sacrificing a lot> to do this, but he is worth it. What are your thoughts?*> *> *> *Thx!*> *Jenn*>