introduction (Marilyn)

[Guest guest]

Hi,

I am new to this list. My son turned 14 last week and received an

educational diagnosis (to qualify for services at school) of

asperger's 2 years ago when he was in 7th grade.

His primary issues are school avoidance, anxiety, black & white

thinking, inflexibility, very strong food preferences (which change,

and meeting them are crucial to his being able to cope each day),

strong aversion to in-home dental care (although he is gettting

dental office cleanings 4x/year and brushing daily now if I pay him

$1 each time), depression, and sometimes uncontrollable anger.

He skipped first grade so is a year younger than his classmates. He

attended school regularly grades K-5 except for missing one month in

5th grade. He missed 30% of 6th, 40% of 7th, 60% of 8th. This year

he went to high school the first 4 days and then said (articulating

the problem very well), " I can't go to this high school. It's too

big for me. " It's taken 2 months but he is now registered at an

online school and I am hoping he will start classes next week, but

concerned that may not work either. I am very concerned about him

getting an education. His counselor has recommended that I apply for

social security for him.

He has been in counseling and on meds the last 2.5 years. They have

helped but in many ways the issues are all still the same, so I am

taking a step back and wondering if we should be considering a

different approach. We live in a small town and I am wondering if

the resources here are not experienced enough with these issues to

help him. I'm considering getting him evaluated at the medical

school in Portland (which hypothetically is bigger and offers more

options) to get some more specific advice about what might help him.

Recently the overwhelming anger has resurfaced which is another

major concern; he is now as big as I am so I can't hold him and

soothe him until it subsides anymore. Meds helped with this before

and I'm hoping will help again; I think he is just so uncomfortable

he doesn't know what to do and eventually explodes.

If you have any ideas you think might help us, I'd very much

appreciate hearing about them. Thank you

Marilyn