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unhelpful schools

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My son's school has really upset me.I went to see his teacher today

because he said was feeling angry and he had asked to take in

something in his pocket to squeeze like his Asperger's friend had (he

had one himself at school in the past). His teacher had told me it

was not working as he was 'playing' with it (actually he was

stretching it which he finds calming) and that he didn't get angry or

stressed and was a very mellow child. I was amazed. my son is 7 and

has been in the mental health system since 3. At last he is now

having a proper assessment and now it looks as if aspergers/high

functioning autism and poss ADHD are to be confirmed. At home his

behaviour follows a predictable cycle of 2-3 weeks as a lovely child

with just the Asperger's traits followed by 2-3 weeks of hell with

violent outburst (mainly towards me) where he punches, kicks and

scratches me and has drawn blood numerous times and has broken a door

and a table. He has had anger issues at school which they seem to

have forgotten about and now they are asking me if I have tried

reward charts and punishing him. I have tried absolutley everything

and explained how cyclic it is and I felt she wasn't listening. Once

again I left feeling his problems were brushed aside and my parenting

skills were being brought in to question. Any idea what i should do.

My son says he does get very angry and stressed at school. What is

going on? Val

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