Guest guest Posted March 13, 2009 Report Share Posted March 13, 2009 We're going to our 4th or 5th session of family camp this summer. We go at the same time as a bunch of other families we're friendly with, but don't usually see other than at summertime. Last year, Bam was starting to have some obvious problems with the other kids. He would do things they found weird or gross... you know, I'm sure. And they remember him from year to year, though he doesn't remember them. I'm wondering if I should ask the other parents who are coming to explain to their kids about Bam's autism, in the hopes they will be more tolerant of him. What do you think? Any suggestions about how to approach it? Willa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 > > I'm wondering if I should ask the other parents who are coming > to explain to their kids about Bam's autism, in the hopes they > will be more tolerant of him. What do you think? Any suggestions > about how to approach it? I don't really have any suggestions, but would like to hear any success stories. This is something that has always been problematic for us. We've lost a lot of friends (or they just become more distant), and the same for relatives, really. But I feel like I really didn't handle it very well. We found out the dx so late (when he was 12) that it made it very awkward. I think the longer you go without letting people know, the more awkward it gets. But on the other hand, when you drop the " autism " word on people, it often falls like a bomb. Sometimes I just talk about symptoms without naming any names, e.g. just let people know that my son has a neurological condition that causes him to have a hard time understanding non-verbal communication etc. That seems to go over better. But on the other hand, people understand less. For example, they'll be less understanding about my son's picky eating and be very judgmental about how I let him eat something other than what is on the menu. Maybe if they knew he was autistic, they would understand I can't " make " him eat things he " can't " eat. I don't know. And people aren't very understanding of my husband, who is blind, either, so it isn't just autism. I think unless people, many people, actually live with someone with a disability, they just don't think of all the ramifications of that disability, which in turn causes them not to have much sympathy since they don't even see the problems. Even something as obvious as my husband's blindness. I think the sad reality is that you have to find a new, hopefully just partially new, probably smaller, circle of friends (and family) that are supportive of your challenges. Although my aspie is 14, since we just found out officially 2 years ago, I am still really in this process myself. Ruth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 On Nov 12, 1:26am, " r_woman2 " wrote: } I don't really have any suggestions, but would like to hear any success sto= } ries. This is something that has always been problematic for us. We've lo= } st a lot of friends (or they just become more distant), and the same for re= } latives, really. But I feel like I really didn't handle it very well. We = I don't think we've had as hard a time as you, perhaps because we've known for such a long time (since before he was three) and have always been pretty open about it. I think most of our camp friends already know, for example. I can see how getting a late diagnosis would make things more difficult. Willa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 16, 2009 Report Share Posted March 16, 2009 My experience has been very good with telling everyone around my son about his disability. We had one experience with a nasty neighbor and it was the adults in the house who set the tone for a great deal of nastiness. Everyone else has been great. Here are some examples. In october of 2007 we moved from TX to NH. When we arrived I made sure we showed a video to the class. Later in the school some time probably last spring a teacher called to tell me a wonderful little tear jerker of a story. I've told it here before but just in case someone hasn't heard it, you need to know that there really are some GREAT and understanding kids out there. Anyway, the teacher called to tell me about something in PE. Phys ed is always hard for asperger kids. Too much noise, too many people, too much competition. So one day the kids were outside for PE and the coach said to run around the track. was following the rules to the letter. The athletic kids finished first then the less athletic kids cheated and cut across the middle of the track. Then was all alone on the track and following the rule. One of the kids noticed this and went out and ran with . He ran just a little behind so wouldn't feel he was losing and then encouraged the whole way, " You can do it, . " That kind of stuff. finished the track and all of his classmates gave him a big cheer. It was like they'd all decided in advance to just make 's day. was so proud as he should have been because he finished and didn't cheat. I don't know who that kid was but he's the best. It makes me cry every time I think of it. His homeroom teacher cried. The special ed teacher cried. My husband even got teary over it. It was just a beautiful moment. It could have been horrible if felt he was losing and thought people were teasing. But everyone did their part to make him feel good. Maybe they'd have done it anyway, but these kids did have the benefit of seeing a video from coultervideo.com for teaching elementary kid about classmates with asperger syndrome. They have something for the older kids too. Miriam In , Willa Hunt <willaful@...> wrote: > > We're going to our 4th or 5th session of family camp > this summer. We go at the same time as a bunch of other > families we're friendly with, but don't usually see other > than at summertime. > > Last year, Bam was starting to have some obvious problems > with the other kids. He would do things they found weird or > gross... you know, I'm sure. And they remember him from year > to year, though he doesn't remember them. > > I'm wondering if I should ask the other parents who are coming > to explain to their kids about Bam's autism, in the hopes they > will be more tolerant of him. What do you think? Any suggestions > about how to approach it? > > Willa > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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