21 yr chronological age -12-13 emotionally

[Guest guest]

How do you deal with a 21 yr old Asperger who has very poor judgement, may never be able to live completely independently, but continually reminds me that she's 21 now and can do as she pleases. She is very naive but has discovered boys! When she got her disability settlement she used some of it to buy a laptop. She's very computer literate (typical for most Aspergers) and has spent way too much time on-line getting to know all the guys out there. She was chatting with some guy in AZ last week with some younger children around. One young man went home and told his mother that my 21 yr old was being asked some rather obscene questions by a military guy in another state. Then my daughter told the children in her room that she was going to marry this guy she had been chatting with. All she knows about him is through her connections on chat in My Space. The mother called me very concerned and told me what her child reported. I confronted my 21 yr old and she acted embarrassed, but reminded me again that she's 21 she can do as she pleases! That was my excuse to confiscate her computer. I still have it and I'm not sure what to do with it. I wash there was a way to disconnect the Internet. We have wireless high speed in our home and all computers in the house can access it.

For her 18th birthday we bought her a cell phone. Having almost friends we figured that might be a way to help her connect to people. Her bill for the first month was over $900. We were all shocked! She was downloading all kind of songs and games and using it as a computer. She had to pay it out of her disability check, and I called AT & T and had them put a block on her phone so that she could only make and receive calls, nothing else. Apparently without our permission the block was taken off. Last month while playing with her phone she discovered she had Internet access again. This morning we got a phone bill from AT & T with around $2,350. charged to her number. I called AT & T and because we didn't authorize the block to be removed they are looking into adjusting the bill and taking off all her charges. The lady said there was already over $1,000 worth of Internet usage charged towards next month's bill. The block is back in place and we will have to call again when we get next months bill and have another adjustment. As a result I confiscated her cell phone. I haven't told her they are going to adjust the bill so she is feeling guilty and thinking I am probably justified in taking her phone.

I'm not sure what to do with her phone either. In checking out her received phone calls it looks like a lot of guys have been calling her all through the night. So tonight I will sleep with her phone and as they start calling I will ask them to stop calling and I may even tell them that she is Autistic and as a result of misuse of the phone she has just lost it. I can't wait till the guy who asks her to marry him via chat, and who asked her the obscene questions, calls! I am ready for him!

My question... How do we protect our Aspie 21 year olds from getting in to BIG trouble and making some serious mistakes???

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