Re: Re: Help! My son has asperger's with adhd AND volume control

[Guest guest]

volume control??? is there such a thing with some of our aspies???

Okay my aspie son (also 7) has very little, though if you take him to a

library or book store he is wonderfully quiet (he LOVES books). my

younger son (5 and supposedly nt, im not so sure about that, but hes

more social) also has no volume control but he does not have an " inside "

voice at all. I have tried everything as well, so im interested as well

in finding a solution.

As for time outs etc.... since you are teaching your son to take

control of himself, have you tried offering a " cool off " spot? meaning

it is not a time out (punishment) but a spot in the house/school etc

where he can " cool off " and regain control of himself that is away from

everyone? the reason i ask is my son does the same things you are

describing. I started with a cool off zone in his room with his books

and kinects (sp i know) he could go there and get some peace from

everything, and come out when he was ready (i made it very clear that he

had to be calm and showed him what that meant and made very sure he

understood the emotional state i meant). at first i caught him as soon

as i could in the meltdown (at the time we were extremely new to this so

it was about midpoint of the meltdown) and sent him to the cool off

zone. then i would go check on him every few minutes until he was

calm. then we discussed what happened emotions and all. then again we

discussed how he was calm and what that meant etc... then he could go

and play or whatever. Then as I learned more i would send him earlier

and earlier. then miraculously he started asking to go to the cool off

spot (and yes it was appropriate at the times he asked for him to go).

when he is there i promised and still do make sure that his little

brother stays out of the room so that he can calm down (little brother

just makes things worse)

its not a great solution but it might work. we went from 2-6 hour

tantrums that would restart the next morning, to about 5-10 minutes now,

and thats if we arent at home lol. at home he rarely has one unless it

involves his ps2 games (frustration meltdowns). it might be worth a

try, it has worked wonderfully for us, oh and we also used a book that

had feelings in it, to get him to discuss (point to) the feeling he was

having. just a suggestion. time outs never worked for my aspie.

taking toys etc never worked, now the playstation, he understands its

gone and just counts days until he gets it back, but never seems to get

the coorelation to the misbehavior.

christyking2 wrote:

>

> Any ideas for teaching volume control? My son drives me nuts with the

> noise! I have tried showing him how loud he sounds by talking to him

> in the same voice - he thinks it is too loud but says he can't hear how

> loud he is (he does NOT have a hearing problem) so I tried saying to

> always talk in a voice that sounds like a whisper to him, but that

> hasn't worked either. He will rarely quiet down even briefly upon

> reminders.

>

> Time outs have never really worked for my son (now 7, Asperger's and

> overactive but not ADHD) either, but I still give short ones anyway

> (starts with " come back when you are calm " . If he stomps or argues, it

> turns to 2 minutes and if he keeps stomping, arguing, door slamming,

> etc. he gets another minute added on.

>

> What this has been really good for is that my son's major behavior

> problem at school is the meltdown when angry and this is slowly

> teaching him to control his anger. We talk a lot about how if you just

> TAKE your consquence then you are back in 2 minutes or less, but if you

> throw a fit you lose a lot more time.

>

> This is important to me even though I have to listen to the fit,

> because it gets old getting called to pick DS up from school all

> because he went from being told to move to the back of the line for

> talking (or some equally minor consequence) to knocking chairs over and

> screaming at the teacher.

>

> He now will often feel very proud of himself, even if he ended up with

> a 15 minute time out and say something like see, I didn't ruin the

> whole day, I got control of myself. He even chose " just take my time

> out " as one of his New Year's Resolutions.

>

>

[Guest guest]

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I try these things!!! We use them in the special Ed class!

-- ( ) Re: Help! My son has asperger's with adhd AND volume control

Any ideas for teaching volume control? My son drives me nuts with the noise! I have tried showing him how loud he sounds by talking to him in the same voice - he thinks it is too loud but says he can't hear how loud he is (he does NOT have a hearing problem) so I tried saying to always talk in a voice that sounds like a whisper to him, but that hasn't worked either. He will rarely quiet down even briefly upon reminders.Time outs have never really worked for my son (now 7, Asperger's and overactive but not ADHD) either, but I still give short ones anyway (starts with "come back when you are calm". If he stomps or argues, it turns to 2 minutes and if he keeps stomping, arguing, door slamming, etc. he gets another minute added on. What this has been really good for is that my son's major behavior problem at school is the meltdown when angry and this is slowly teaching him to control his anger. We talk a lot about how if you just TAKE your consquence then you are back in 2 minutes or less, but if you throw a fit you lose a lot more time. This is important to me even though I have to listen to the fit, because it gets old getting called to pick DS up from school all because he went from being told to move to the back of the line for talking (or some equally minor consequence) to knocking chairs over and screaming at the teacher.He now will often feel very proud of himself, even if he ended up with a 15 minute time out and say something like see, I didn't ruin the whole day, I got control of myself. He even chose "just take my time out" as one of his New Year's Resolutions.