RE: just don't know what to do about summer

[Guest guest]

>

> He is so *impossible* around other kids. They try to engage

> with him and he's actively hostile. Another mom of a HFA

> kid speculates that it's because he feels unsuccessful with

> socializing. Probably so, but I have no idea what to do about

> it. We've done so many interventions and nothing helps. He

> just gets worse and worse. The kids he grew up with still

> try to play with him, but he's so unpleasant to them, I

> don't know how long they'll put up with it.

Have you found a social skills training group that is a good fit for him? That

would be a start. They usually only meet once a week, but there is usually

" homework " to do.

What is his special interest?

I had to work very hard to find things my AS child liked and that had staff who

could work with him at your child's age, so don't feel you're alone in that. It

is hard work. You won't be able to just stick him in any old camp or activity

that looks good the way " normal " parents can. You have to take the time to

interview the staff/director and find out exactly how they are going to do

things so you can tell if your child can have an okay time there. A lot of the

" impossible-ness " of your child is probably coming from lack of adequate

supervision and/or inflexible adults.

Although I did put my child in camps and activities at that age (some of which

were disaster), we did a lot as a family too. He got, and continues to get, a

lot more of his socialization from family than friends than is typical. I think

that is part of the package. Instead of camps, think about day trips you can

take as a family. Go to various parks a lot. He can socialize, but you will be

there to model and keep a handle on things. You can also socialize with him one

on one yourself, letting him take the lead with his special interests or even

just everyday things you are working on with him.

You're probably right about the neighbor kids. There will come a point when

they will stop trying to play with him. To be honest, we were kind of relieved

when this point came. They, and their families, weren't a good fit. He is more

isolated now, but hopefully at some point, when he has finally got enough social

skills to maintain a friendship, he will find friends that are a better fit and

more deserving to be his friend.

Hope this helps!

Ruth

[Guest guest]

On Dec 16, 6:51am, " r_woman2 " wrote:

}

} >

} > He is so *impossible* around other kids. They try to engage

} > with him and he's actively hostile. Another mom of a HFA

} > kid speculates that it's because he feels unsuccessful with

} > socializing. Probably so, but I have no idea what to do about

} > it. We've done so many interventions and nothing helps. He

} > just gets worse and worse. The kids he grew up with still

} > try to play with him, but he's so unpleasant to them, I

} > don't know how long they'll put up with it.

}

} Have you found a social skills training group that is a good fit for him? =

} That would be a start. They usually only meet once a week, but there is us=

} ually " homework " to do.

}

I gues not, because we've done any number of them and like I said,

his behavior and attitude just gets worse.

} What is his special interest?

That's a tricky question. It changes constantly. And it's rarely

anything other kids can relate to (except video games and Dance Dance

Revolution.) Like he obsesses on pretending to be Pacman or characters

from the GOldfish cracker website. :-\

}

} Although I did put my child in camps and activities at that age (some of wh=

} ich were disaster), we did a lot as a family too. He got, and continues to=

} get, a lot more of his socialization from family than friends than is typi=

} cal. I think that is part of the package. Instead of camps, think about d=

} ay trips you can take as a family. Go to various parks a lot. He can soci=

} alize, but you will be there to model and keep a handle on things. You can=

} also socialize with him one on one yourself, letting him take the lead wit=

} h his special interests or even just everyday things you are working on wit=

} h him.

I just hate taking him to the park. He rejects all the other kids and

so rudely. I don't know how to faciliate any play, nothing I try works.

He socializes well with us and his babysitters, but we can't play with

him all the time. And I'm not sure it's helping him to be with adults

so much. But the things we do to try and help him be with kids don't

work either.

Willa

[Guest guest]

There are also a lot of camps either specifically made for aspies, or have tons of aspies (like at least a 1/3). These camps will help kids learn to socialize a bit better, and just have fun. They also generally have at least 3 to 1 (frequently close to a 2 to 1) counselor ratio, so it would practically be like having his own person, at least some of the time. Now with all that said, these camps aren't everywhere (the ones that I know of are in CO, MN, TX, NC, OH, CA, and a couple in the Northeast) so not sure where you are from but there shoud be one nearby within a few states, but might not be. And even worse they can get a bit expensive (like $800-3,000) so not sure how feasible that is for you.

From: willaful@...Date: Sat, 18 Apr 2009 11:07:55 -0700Subject: ( ) just don't know what to do about summer

I have no idea what to do with my boy this summer. Isee other people talking about putting their ASD kidsin all kinds of programs and I just don't know how theydo it.He is so *impossible* around other kids. They try to engagewith him and he's actively hostile. Another mom of a HFAkid speculates that it's because he feels unsuccessful withsocializing. Probably so, but I have no idea what to do aboutit. We've done so many interventions and nothing helps. Hejust gets worse and worse. The kids he grew up with stilltry to play with him, but he's so unpleasant to them, Idon't know how long they'll put up with it.If it was just that he didn't like people and wanted to bealone that would be one thing, but I know that's not true.I think he's horribly lonely and he's only going to getlonelier.We get 48 hours of respite care a month, which isn't reallyenough to send someone with him as an aide.Willamom of Bam, 7 1/2, HFA

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[Guest guest]

On Dec 16, 2:15am, G wrote:

}

} There are also a lot of camps either specifically made for aspies, or have =

} tons of aspies (like at least a 1/3). These camps will help kids learn to =

} socialize a bit better, and just have fun. They also generally have at lea=

} st 3 to 1 (frequently close to a 2 to 1) counselor ratio, so it would pract=

} ically be like having his own person, at least some of the time. Now with =

} all that said, these camps aren't everywhere (the ones that I know of are i=

} n CO, MN, TX, NC, OH, CA, and a couple in the Northeast) so not sure where =

} you are from but there shoud be one nearby within a few states, but might n=

} ot be. And even worse they can get a bit expensive (like $800-3,000) so no=

} t sure how feasible that is for you.

I don't think he's ready for overnight camp yet. I asked our service

coordinator for ideas and he didn't know of anything other than overnight

camps. But he tends to be kind of useless. :-\

There's a gynnastics day camp that I would *love* to send him to,

because he adores hanging from his chin-up bar and has taught himself

all kinds of cool tricks, like hanging from just one leg. But I feel

like it would be disaster waiting to happen with the other kids. :-(

Willa

[Guest guest]

My daughter can't cope in group social skills either.

She runs out. Our therapist recommended at school we

we get the school to set up 1:1 conversation skills for

a very short time frame and work up. She also said about

socializing stop the social engagement before she gets upset.

She said leave them both wanting more. Good advice. But it has not

worked because it is so hard to get her to stop.

We joined a campground that had regular members and

scheduled events. It helps us not feel so isolated.

And our daughter plays with the little kids.

She is explosive there too. But I noticed some kids

under 7 years old don't mind her temper tantrums too much.

It is so embarassing. I don't mind when she does this

at home but in public it is so upsetting to me.

Our daughter could never sustain a whole day at camp

even half a day she seems alitle cooked.

Last summer I begged my husband to take a day off every other

week to do something with us so it isn't only me all the time.

And we went to places kids typcially go, musuems, zoos.

And then we went to the campground on the weekend.

She also tried music lessons.

Good

>

> I have no idea what to do with my boy this summer. I

> see other people talking about putting their ASD kids

> in all kinds of programs and I just don't know how they

> do it.

>

> He is so *impossible* around other kids. They try to engage

> with him and he's actively hostile. Another mom of a HFA

> kid speculates that it's because he feels unsuccessful with

> socializing. Probably so, but I have no idea what to do about

> it. We've done so many interventions and nothing helps. He

> just gets worse and worse. The kids he grew up with still

> try to play with him, but he's so unpleasant to them, I

> don't know how long they'll put up with it.

>

> If it was just that he didn't like people and wanted to be

> alone that would be one thing, but I know that's not true.

> I think he's horribly lonely and he's only going to get

> lonelier.

>

> We get 48 hours of respite care a month, which isn't really

> enough to send someone with him as an aide.

>

> Willa

> mom of Bam, 7 1/2, HFA

>

[Guest guest]

We have an Asperger's camp here in Wisconsin. It's through Easter Seals. Might want to check it out.

My son went in November and said he had a wonderful time. wow!!! It was only for a weekend, but he liked it.

There's one coming up this summer for a whole week and he actually said that "he wouldn't mind it"...he he.

From: G <fnofsports@...>Subject: RE: ( ) just don't know what to do about summerAspergers Treatment Date: Saturday, April 18, 2009, 5:24 PM

There are also a lot of camps either specifically made for aspies, or have tons of aspies (like at least a 1/3). These camps will help kids learn to socialize a bit better, and just have fun. They also generally have at least 3 to 1 (frequently close to a 2 to 1) counselor ratio, so it would practically be like having his own person, at least some of the time. Now with all that said, these camps aren't everywhere (the ones that I know of are in CO, MN, TX, NC, OH, CA, and a couple in the Northeast) so not sure where you are from but there shoud be one nearby within a few states, but might not be. And even worse they can get a bit expensive (like $800-3,000) so not sure how feasible that is for you.

From: willafularmory (DOT) comDate: Sat, 18 Apr 2009 11:07:55 -0700Subject: ( ) just don't know what to do about summer

I have no idea what to do with my boy this summer. Isee other people talking about putting their ASD kidsin all kinds of programs and I just don't know how theydo it.He is so *impossible* around other kids. They try to engagewith him and he's actively hostile. Another mom of a HFAkid speculates that it's because he feels unsuccessful withsocializing. Probably so, but I have no idea what to do aboutit. We've done so many interventions and nothing helps. Hejust gets worse and worse. The kids he grew up with stilltry to play with him, but he's so unpleasant to them, Idon't know how long they'll put up with it.If it was just that he didn't like people and wanted to bealone that would be one thing, but I know that's not true.I think he's horribly lonely and he's only going to getlonelier.We get 48 hours of respite care a month, which isn't reallyenough

to send someone with him as an aide.Willamom of Bam, 7 1/2, HFA

Rediscover Hotmail®: Now available on your iPhone or BlackBerry Check it out.

[Guest guest]

> He socializes well with us and his babysitters, but we can't play with

> him all the time. And I'm not sure it's helping him to be with adults

> so much. But the things we do to try and help him be with kids don't

> work either.

So, maybe he just needs to learn how to parallel play peacefully at this point?

And, meanwhile, keep taking him to those social skills training groups, so he

can keep learning social skills? I'm going WAY out on a limb here since I don't

know you, well, at all, but I think it is possible you are expecting too much

and trying to go too fast. Your son has a long road ahead of him to learn the

social skills necessary for relationships. It sounds like he just isn't ready

for a lot of interaction yet. Something I have learned from my son is that our

kids get a lot more out of parallel play than the typical child for much longer.

If he doesn't have the stress of interaction, he may actually enjoy being with

these kids, just playing near them. Once he gets more used to that, and can do

that without incident, he will be more in a frame of mind to go further. So,

maybe what you need to be doing right now is simply running interference so he

can play " near " but not " with " kids at the playground? This may give him the

space he needs to " get used " to being around other kids without negative

incidents. That may give him the strength to move forward.

This is one of those things that makes one realize how serious one's child's

problems are, and it will make you very sad. My 14yo son with Asperger still

does parallel socializing a lot (outside of our family). The only reason it

doesn't totally break my heart is that I know he is enjoying it and it is not so

sad to him. He is enjoying the company of people in his own way. He is not

drowning in self-pity or depression or anything; in fact, his attitude is rather

positive. More positive than mine was at his age!

Ruth

[Guest guest]

Has he engaged 1:1 with another peer in a therapeutic setting? I don't think the park or a large setting is going to work well at first. He will get easily overwhelmed and shut down. I would talk with speech tx or ot about engaging him 1:1 with a typical peer in very structured settings. You may want to look into Steve Gutstein, RDI (Relationship Development Intervention). Pam

In a message dated 4/18/2009 7:18:26 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, willaful@... writes:

On Dec 16, 6:51am, "r_woman2" wrote:} } >} > He is so *impossible* around other kids. They try to engage} > with him and he's actively hostile. Another mom of a HFA} > kid speculates that it's because he feels unsuccessful with} > socializing. Probably so, but I have no idea what to do about} > it. We've done so many interventions and nothing helps. He} > just gets worse and worse. The kids he grew up with still} > try to play with him, but he's so unpleasant to them, I} > don't know how long they'll put up with it.} } Have you found a social skills training group that is a good fit for him? =} That would be a start. They usually only meet once a week, but there is us=} ually "homework" to do.} I gues not, because we've done any number of them and like I said,his behavior and attitude just gets worse.} What is his special interest?That's a tricky question. It changes constantly. And it's rarelyanything other kids can relate to (except video games and Dance DanceRevolution.) Like he obsesses on pretending to be Pacman or charactersfrom the GOldfish cracker website. :-\} } Although I did put my child in camps and activities at that age (some of wh=} ich were disaster), we did a lot as a family too. He got, and continues to=} get, a lot more of his socialization from family than friends than is typi=} cal. I think that is part of the package. Instead of camps, think about d=} ay trips you can take as a family. Go to various parks a lot. He can soci=} alize, but you will be there to model and keep a handle on things. You can=} also socialize with him one on one yourself, letting him take the lead wit=} h his special interests or even just everyday things you are working on wit=} h him.I just hate taking him to the park. He rejects all the other kids andso rudely. I don't know how to faciliate any play, nothing I try works.He socializes well with us and his babysitters, but we can't play withhim all the time. And I'm not sure it's helping him to be with adultsso much. But the things we do to try and help him be with kids don'twork either.Willa

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[Guest guest]

I too have struggled with this. I feel so bad for him because he can't "be" with other kids. I have really beat myself up over this but have recently learned that he really doesn't care as much about it as I do. He is perfectly happy in his own little world. It is very hard for him to fit in because he will approach someone and start talking randomly about pokeman or some gadget he is trying to build that makes no sense. They often just look at him like he is strange and walk away, and in that case it is good that he can't read social skills. My Cole used to be aggressive to the pt that I couldn't take him anywhere but is growing out of it for the most part. My advice: hang in there, don't give up and don't feel so bad. For the first time yesterday I took my AS nephew and his younger sister to the Hannah Montana movie by myself and he did great. I held my

breath the whole time!

Lori

Mother of Tyler,19:ADHD

Mother of Korby,16:ODD

Aunt/Guardian of Cole,9:AS

From: Willa Hunt <willaful@...>Subject: ( ) just don't know what to do about summer Date: Saturday, April 18, 2009, 1:07 PM

I have no idea what to do with my boy this summer. Isee other people talking about putting their ASD kidsin all kinds of programs and I just don't know how theydo it.He is so *impossible* around other kids. They try to engagewith him and he's actively hostile. Another mom of a HFAkid speculates that it's because he feels unsuccessful withsocializing. Probably so, but I have no idea what to do aboutit. We've done so many interventions and nothing helps. Hejust gets worse and worse. The kids he grew up with stilltry to play with him, but he's so unpleasant to them, Idon't know how long they'll put up with it.If it was just that he didn't like people and wanted to bealone that would be one thing, but I know that's not true.I think he's horribly lonely and he's only going to getlonelier.We get 48 hours of respite care a month, which isn't reallyenough

to send someone with him as an aide.Willamom of Bam, 7 1/2, HFA------------------------------------

[Guest guest]

That sure sounds like my son when he was younger, although the "talking randomly" about stuff is still going on =) At least now I've taught him to preface whatever is about to come out of his mouth with some background so there's a chance the person he approaches will understand what he's saying. So now he'll start with "on iCarly there was this boy at a party who said...." instead of just walking up and starting to tell me the punchline, like I'm supposed to get what he's talking about and share in the humor of the situation. He's better about giving some sort of background but it's still a challenge with us. I used to act like I understood b/c it was so constant (approaching me and just blurting out random stories or scenes from shows) and I didn't want to hurt his feelings or enthusiasm but as he got older, I realized I wasn't doing him any favors with this approach b/c it was

turning people off that didn't love him like I did.

He still struggles socially and he's 12. He gets socialization mainly from his grandfather, me, and my daughter (NT, 7). He also is on a soccer team which practices twice a week w/ games on Saturdays and he's part of a church youth group that meets on Wednesdays in the evenings. There's one boy that he sees every month or so when they're visiting their dad that lives down the street from my parents but that's about it in terms of "friends". His best friend moved to Arizona last year and we still haven't found a regular "replacement." Dylan can be extremely rigid so we're working on that, mostly through play w/ his sister. He'll be attending a social skills camp over the summer that was really helpful last summer.

"Over-optimism is waiting for you ship to come in when you haven't sent one out."

From: lori jennings <lozzy3us@...> Sent: Sunday, April 19, 2009 8:45:56 AMSubject: Re: ( ) just don't know what to do about summer

I too have struggled with this. I feel so bad for him because he can't "be" with other kids. I have really beat myself up over this but have recently learned that he really doesn't care as much about it as I do. He is perfectly happy in his own little world. It is very hard for him to fit in because he will approach someone and start talking randomly about pokeman or some gadget he is trying to build that makes no sense. They often just look at him like he is strange and walk away, and in that case it is good that he can't read social skills. My Cole used to be aggressive to the pt that I couldn't take him anywhere but is growing out of it for the most part. My advice: hang in there, don't give up and don't feel so bad. For the first time yesterday I took my AS nephew and his younger sister to the Hannah Montana movie by myself and he did great. I held my breath the whole time!

Lori

Mother of Tyler,19:ADHD

Mother of Korby,16:ODD

Aunt/Guardian of Cole,9:AS

From: Willa Hunt <willafularmory (DOT) com>Subject: ( ) just don't know what to do about summer Date: Saturday, April 18, 2009, 1:07 PM

I have no idea what to do with my boy this summer. Isee other people talking about putting their ASD kidsin all kinds of programs and I just don't know how theydo it.He is so *impossible* around other kids. They try to engagewith him and he's actively hostile. Another mom of a HFAkid speculates that it's because he feels unsuccessful withsocializing. Probably so, but I have no idea what to do aboutit. We've done so many interventions and nothing helps. Hejust gets worse and worse. The kids he grew up with stilltry to play with him, but he's so unpleasant to them, Idon't know how long they'll put up with it.If it was just that he didn't like people and wanted to bealone that would be one thing, but I know that's not true.I think he's horribly lonely and he's only going to getlonelier.We get 48 hours of respite care a month, which isn't reallyenough

to send someone with him as an aide.Willamom of Bam, 7 1/2, HFA------------ --------- --------- ------

[Guest guest]

On Dec 16, 11:38am, " r_woman2 " wrote:

}

} So, maybe he just needs to learn how to parallel play peacefully at this po=

} int? And, meanwhile, keep taking him to those social skills training group=

} s, so he can keep learning social skills? I'm going WAY out on a limb here=

} since I don't know you, well, at all, but I think it is possible you are e=

} xpecting too much and trying to go too fast. Your son has a long road ahea=

} d of him to learn the social skills necessary for relationships. It sounds=

} like he just isn't ready for a lot of interaction yet. Something I have l=

You may have something there, Ruth. I'm not quite sure how to intrepret

your advice though. If I'm trying to go to fast, shouldn't we stop doing

the social skills groups? Because they're really what's setting the pace,

and making him interact with other kids.

Willa

[Guest guest]

On Dec 16, 4:45pm, ppanda65@... wrote:

}

} Has he engaged 1:1 with another peer in a therapeutic setting? I don't

} think the park or a large setting is going to work well at first. He will

} get easily overwhelmed and shut down. I would talk with speech tx or ot

} about engaging him 1:1 with a typical peer in very structured settings. You

} may want to look into Steve Gutstein, RDI (Relationship Development

} Intervention). Pam

He's in a diad, but not with a typical child, with another special needs

child. I honestly don't think it's particularly helpful and am thinking

of ending it.

Willa

[Guest guest]

Ya know, my son is only 6 and I am having that problem and we still have to get him to slow down but even then I still have trouble understanding him. Please if you have any tips on how you made it to age 12 please let me know I am sinking here...and my family really isn't helping much. I seem to be working on this on my own!!katie

From: Willa Hunt <willafularmory (DOT) com>Subject: ( ) just don't know what to do about summer Date: Saturday, April 18, 2009, 1:07 PM

I have no idea what to do with my boy this summer. Isee other people talking about putting their ASD kidsin all kinds of programs and I just don't know how theydo it.He is so *impossible* around other kids. They try to engagewith him and he's actively hostile. Another mom of a HFAkid speculates that it's because he feels unsuccessful withsocializing. Probably so, but I have no idea what to do aboutit. We've done so many interventions and nothing helps. Hejust gets worse and worse. The kids he grew up with stilltry to play with him, but he's so unpleasant to them, Idon't know how long they'll put up with it.If it was just that he didn't like people and wanted to bealone that would be one thing, but I know that's not true.I think he's horribly lonely and he's only going to getlonelier.We get 48 hours of respite care a month, which isn't reallyenough

to send someone with him as an aide.Willamom of Bam, 7 1/2, HFA------------ --------- --------- ------

[Guest guest]

When I first decided to try something, I'd calmly hold my hand up like "stop" to interrupt him and say "I'd like to hear your story but you have to tell me what happened before the funny part or it won't make sense to me." Then he'd give me a little info and tell me the punch line and I was normally in the dark still to some degree, but we were getting somewhere. Slowly he's added a little more to it at my urging like "okay, I know a guy was involved now but who else is in the story? What show is this? What was the guy doing before the funny thing happened?" ...things like that. Honestly, I still don't get every single thing he tells me but I probably understand the humor at least 50-75% of the time and that's a huge improvement from where it used to be. I would also reiterate after he told me a story "Thanks for telling me the show it's

from and what happened to the guy at the beginning so I could understand." to reinforce him doing this. We aren't 100%, but there is a definite improvement.

"Over-optimism is waiting for you ship to come in when you haven't sent one out."

From: katie fletcher <katedarrell@...> Sent: Sunday, April 19, 2009 8:22:41 PMSubject: Re: ( ) just don't know what to do about summer

Ya know, my son is only 6 and I am having that problem and we still have to get him to slow down but even then I still have trouble understanding him. Please if you have any tips on how you made it to age 12 please let me know I am sinking here...and my family really isn't helping much. I seem to be working on this on my own!!katie

From: Willa Hunt <willafularmory (DOT) com>Subject: ( ) just don't know what to do about summer Date: Saturday, April 18, 2009, 1:07 PM

I have no idea what to do with my boy this summer. Isee other people talking about putting their ASD kidsin all kinds of programs and I just don't know how theydo it.He is so *impossible* around other kids. They try to engagewith him and he's actively hostile. Another mom of a HFAkid speculates that it's because he feels unsuccessful withsocializing. Probably so, but I have no idea what to do aboutit. We've done so many interventions and nothing helps. Hejust gets worse and worse. The kids he grew up with stilltry to play with him, but he's so unpleasant to them, Idon't know how long they'll put up with it.If it was just that he didn't like people and wanted to bealone that would be one thing, but I know that's not true.I think he's horribly lonely and he's only going to getlonelier.We get 48 hours of respite care a month, which isn't reallyenough

to send someone with him as an aide.Willamom of Bam, 7 1/2, HFA------------ --------- --------- ------

[Guest guest]

> You may have something there, Ruth. I'm not quite sure how to intrepret

> your advice though. If I'm trying to go to fast, shouldn't we stop doing

> the social skills groups? Because they're really what's setting the pace,

> and making him interact with other kids.

No, but maybe he needs to be in a different social skills group. Social skills

groups are supposed to be composed of kids at roughly the same level of social

skill ability. The organization he is taking his through should have different

groups made up of different types of kids at different levels of development.

For example, an ADHD child who simply needs to learn to pay attention to

non-verbal communication has different needs than an autistic child who needs to

explicitly be taught how to read it. And then they need to be separated further

into different levels of development so you don't have less advanced kids

getting overwhelmed and more advanced kids being underwhelmed. Sometimes you

can get away with mixing it up a little if you have a talented counselor who can

handle it.

Ruth

[Guest guest]

I am trying this to and being he is only turning 6 he is still far advanced and I still have to get him to replay alot. But, we both are doing better with it. I just wish the rest of my family would find the patience with him.

From: Willa Hunt <willafularmory (DOT) com>Subject: ( ) just don't know what to do about summer Date: Saturday, April 18, 2009, 1:07 PM

I have no idea what to do with my boy this summer. Isee other people talking about putting their ASD kidsin all kinds of programs and I just don't know how theydo it.He is so *impossible* around other kids. They try to engagewith him and he's actively hostile. Another mom of a HFAkid speculates that it's because he feels unsuccessful withsocializing. Probably so, but I have no idea what to do aboutit. We've done so many interventions and nothing helps. Hejust gets worse and worse. The kids he grew up with stilltry to play with him, but he's so unpleasant to them, Idon't know how long they'll put up with it.If it was just that he didn't like people and wanted to bealone that would be one thing, but I know that's not true.I think he's horribly lonely and he's only going to getlonelier.We get 48 hours of respite care a month, which isn't reallyenough

to send someone with him as an aide.Willamom of Bam, 7 1/2, HFA------------ --------- --------- ------

[Guest guest]

and/or Robin,

Where in Wisconsin. Can you give me the contact information for the summer

camp?

Thanks

Vickie

>

> From: G <fnofsports@...>

> Subject: RE: ( ) just don't know what to do about summer

> Aspergers Treatment

> Date: Saturday, April 18, 2009, 5:24 PM

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> There are also a lot of camps either specifically made for aspies, or have

tons of aspies (like at least a 1/3).  These camps will help kids learn to

socialize a bit better, and just have fun.  They also generally have at least 3

to 1 (frequently close to a 2 to 1) counselor ratio, so it would practically be

like having his own person, at least some of the time.  Now with all that said,

these camps aren't everywhere (the ones that I know of are in CO, MN, TX, NC,

OH, CA, and a couple in the Northeast) so not sure where you are from but there

shoud be one nearby within a few states, but might not be.  And even worse they

can get a bit expensive (like $800-3,000) so not sure how feasible that is for

you.

>  

>

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>

> From: willafularmory (DOT) com

> Date: Sat, 18 Apr 2009 11:07:55 -0700

> Subject: ( ) just don't know what to do about summer

>

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> I have no idea what to do with my boy this summer. I

> see other people talking about putting their ASD kids

> in all kinds of programs and I just don't know how they

> do it.

>

> He is so *impossible* around other kids. They try to engage

> with him and he's actively hostile. Another mom of a HFA

> kid speculates that it's because he feels unsuccessful with

> socializing. Probably so, but I have no idea what to do about

> it. We've done so many interventions and nothing helps. He

> just gets worse and worse. The kids he grew up with still

> try to play with him, but he's so unpleasant to them, I

> don't know how long they'll put up with it.

>

> If it was just that he didn't like people and wanted to be

> alone that would be one thing, but I know that's not true.

> I think he's horribly lonely and he's only going to get

> lonelier.

>

> We get 48 hours of respite care a month, which isn't really

> enough to send someone with him as an aide.

>

> Willa

> mom of Bam, 7 1/2, HFA

>

>

>

>

>

> Rediscover Hotmail®: Now available on your iPhone or BlackBerry Check it out.

>

[Guest guest]

You bet.

The camp is in the Wisconsin Dells at Camp Wawbeek. It's called the "Camp Wawbeek & Wisconsin Elks/Easter Seals Respite Camp.

The site is:

www.EasterSealsWisconsin.com

The toll free # is:

#1800-422-2324

We didn't use the "respite" part.....we signed up for the:

Asperger Syndrome Session.

Like I said, he really liked it.

He got there and they were playing dominoes and was in a room (with no tv - yikes) with 7 others. They have their own bed and area. There was a tv in the "main" part and I honestly thought he'd freak out without a tv and being able to play his games whenever he wanted.

They understood this, though. I wrote it in his "interests" part of the application and when we dropped him off. What was awesome, was that they were all like that.

They hiked, watched movies, made 'banners' for their "dorm",,,,,,had pizza. Then, on the last day, before we came to get him, they went to The Wilderness Water Park in the Dells and had a great time.

Ian brought his DS along, so that was a magnet.

He made 2 friends and they hung out all weekend.

When he got back, I said, well,,,,let's email 'X' and say hi. He said that he didnt' have any info....he forgot. he he.

Only knew their first names and that they were going to go to the next camp. he he.

Hope this info helps.

Robin

From: Vickie Boehnlein <baneline@...>Subject: Re: ( ) just don't know what to do about summer Date: Monday, April 20, 2009, 9:03 AM

and/or Robin,Where in Wisconsin. Can you give me the contact information for the summer camp? ThanksVickie> > From: G <fnofsports@ ...>> Subject: RE: ( ) just don't know what to do about summer> Aspergers Treatment> Date: Saturday, April 18, 2009, 5:24 PM> > > > > > > > > There are also a lot of camps either specifically made for aspies, or have tons of aspies (like at least a 1/3). These camps will help kids learn to socialize a bit better, and just have fun. They also generally have at least 3 to 1 (frequently close to a 2 to 1) counselor ratio, so it would practically be like having his own person, at least some of the time. Now with all that said, these camps aren't everywhere (the ones that I know of are in CO, MN, TX, NC, OH, CA, and a couple in the Northeast) so not sure where you are from but there shoud be one nearby within a few states, but might not be. And even worse they can get a

bit expensive (like $800-3,000) so not sure how feasible that is for you.> > > > > From: willafularmory (DOT) com> Date: Sat, 18 Apr 2009 11:07:55 -0700> Subject: ( ) just don't know what to do about summer> > > > > > > I have no idea what to do with my boy this summer. I> see other people talking about putting their ASD kids> in all kinds of programs and I just don't know how they> do it.> > He is so *impossible* around other kids. They try to engage> with him and he's actively hostile. Another mom of a HFA> kid speculates that it's because he feels unsuccessful with> socializing. Probably so, but I have no idea what to do about> it. We've done so many interventions and nothing helps. He> just gets worse and worse. The kids he

grew up with still> try to play with him, but he's so unpleasant to them, I> don't know how long they'll put up with it.> > If it was just that he didn't like people and wanted to be> alone that would be one thing, but I know that's not true.> I think he's horribly lonely and he's only going to get> lonelier.> > We get 48 hours of respite care a month, which isn't really> enough to send someone with him as an aide.> > Willa> mom of Bam, 7 1/2, HFA> > > > > > Rediscover Hotmail®: Now available on your iPhone or BlackBerry Check it out.>

[Guest guest]

Are you looking for actual camp settings, or just activities/programs for the

summer? I would definitely check with your easter seals and united way branches.

My son is going to 'summer school' at his current scool. It is hosted by United

way, costs $15 for 3 weeks, 2 days a week/2.5 hours a day. It will have a small

staff/kid ratio,which is what he needs, and they aware of the social

deficiencies autistics have. I am also looking into summer programs at the

pediatric rehab offices nearby. They also have programs for children with

disabilities and work with autistics. He currently goes for OT at one of them. I

may sign him up for a feeding group. They will socialize over lunch, and he will

get more help with handling utensils/cups, etc. My point is, that I am having to

get creative and find things that will fit him. All day/week camps would be too

much for him. Typical programs would not help as he would just stay alone on the

sidelines if not prompted to join in.

You may need to do some digging to find any of these types of alternatives near

you.

TJ

>

> I have no idea what to do with my boy this summer. I

> see other people talking about putting their ASD kids

> in all kinds of programs and I just don't know how they

> do it.

>

> He is so *impossible* around other kids. They try to engage

> with him and he's actively hostile. Another mom of a HFA

> kid speculates that it's because he feels unsuccessful with

> socializing. Probably so, but I have no idea what to do about

> it. We've done so many interventions and nothing helps. He

> just gets worse and worse. The kids he grew up with still

> try to play with him, but he's so unpleasant to them, I

> don't know how long they'll put up with it.

>

> If it was just that he didn't like people and wanted to be

> alone that would be one thing, but I know that's not true.

> I think he's horribly lonely and he's only going to get

> lonelier.

>

> We get 48 hours of respite care a month, which isn't really

> enough to send someone with him as an aide.

>

> Willa

> mom of Bam, 7 1/2, HFA

>