Re: T-Ball

[Guest guest]

>

> This past Saturday was the first game and things didn't go very well. Owen was

excited to go, but once we got there he just wouldn't concentrate or focus on

the game. While he was in the outfield he wandered around, sat on 3rd base and

kept running off the field. When it was his turn to bat he ran the wrong way and

then just got bored and walked off the field. About halfway through the game he

decided he just " couldn't play " and sat in the dugout alone.

This actually isn't terribly unusual behavior for a 5yo. Surely the other kids

were not playing perfectly either. Personally, I don't think baseball in any

form is appropriate for very many 5yo. Most of them find it boring. There may

be one or two early developers on your son's " team " that get it, but I that is

usually about it. The rest are pretty much like your son. Most of them cry and

fuss when it is time to go to practice or a game because they don't want to go.

So, I have two comments. First, give him some time and wait until he is 8 or 10

for baseball or any other team sports. I was really sorry I made my kids suffer

through kiddie team sports--just because it was what everyone else was doing.

It wasn't appropriate developmentally and made them hate sports. I noticed most

of the other kids hated it too. There are very few 5-7yo who have gotten to the

developmental place where they can successfully play team sports. If you look

around at the games, a lot of the adults are sitting there laughing at the kids.

Great environment.

My second comment is to find something more age appropriate that he likes. Why

would you want to make him do a sport he has no natural interest in? Sports

should be fun! Have fun looking for the perfect sport for him. My kids ended

up liking swimming and gymnastics at your son's age, but your son may be

different. One ended up getting into team sports later, and the other, the

aspie, never has, although he likes them okay at the PE class level.

At his age, individual sports or instruction is more appropriate.

You also have to look at his dx. My son doesn't have attention problems, so I

can't say much about that, although that is obviously something you have to

consider. But my son has a coordination disorder and executive dysfunction, so

I have to consider that. Considering his dx, has he had a complete OT eval? It

is helpful to know exactly where his executive functioning and OT weaknesses and

strengths to help you pick out his sport(s).

Anyway, that is my BTDT.

Ruth

[Guest guest]

My son tried T-ball at about the same age and I was excited b/c I played when I was his age too. At the time he had an ADHD diagnosis but not Aspergers. Although Dylan was clearly suited physically to play the game (great hand/eye coordination, knew the rules, threw well, etc...) the standing around part was too much. He'd be in the outfield announcing to everyone what the score was (when they weren't officially supposed to be keeping score) and generally making small talk after just about every move on the field. This also happened when he was standing on the bases ready to run. He talked ALL OF THE TIME. That was our only year of T-Ball. He was just too bored standing around waiting for the next move. Then we tried karate and he liked wrestling w/ his karate instructor more than learning any karate! In 3rd grade, we started soccer

and we've stayed with it ever sense. Not that it's been smooth sailing the whole time, but he hasn't had a meltdown on the field since probably his first year. The constant moving helped him tons. So maybe try soccer again but before you do, get him some soccer DVDs or some one-on-one instruction so he can learn more about the rules on the peripheral before he's actually playing himself. That way, he has a better foundation for the game and it's not so personal maybe? Just an idea.

"Over-optimism is waiting for you ship to come in when you haven't sent one out."

From: hguarino <heidi.guarino@...> Sent: Monday, May 4, 2009 1:33:17 PMSubject: ( ) T-Ball

Hi everyone, I haven't posted in a while, but I read everyone's comments every day and find them both useful and hopeful. My son Owen is nearly 6, was diagnosed about 2 years ago and generally does extremely well. He has his quirks, but he's extremely social, easy to move from one thing to another and generally very agreeable. It's T-ball season, and my husband was eager to get him involved, now that he's the right age. So two weeks ago we participated in the city-wide parade for the whole Little League (T-ball, softball and baseball, so kids from 5-13), and Owen had a blast. In fact he got so excited when he met his teammates that he introduced himself to each one and held out his hand to shake with them. The coach's wife laughed and called him a future politician. This past Saturday was the first game and things didn't go very well. Owen was excited to go, but once we got there he just wouldn't concentrate or focus on the

game. While he was in the outfield he wandered around, sat on 3rd base and kept running off the field. When it was his turn to bat he ran the wrong way and then just got bored and walked off the field. About halfway through the game he decided he just "couldn't play" and sat in the dugout alone. It was heartbreaking to watch. We've talked him through the game multiple times, my husband is constantly trying to get him outside to play catch so he can get used to the concept of using a glove, and one of his classmates is even on his team. I'm not sure how we can get him more interested/involved in the game - part of me just wants to write it off and assume it's just not his thing; the other part of me doesn't want to let him give up that easily and insist that he keep trying. Any suggestions for ways to make this easier and ultimately more fun for everyone? Heidi

[Guest guest]

Another cool, although more expensive sport to get your kid involved in is bowling. Their are kids leagues everywhere. While you have to sit a lot when you are your allowed/encouraged to goof around while sitting around at that age (not to mention he can come talk to you, I still talked to my parents in between frames when I was 20 lol). You get in a bumper league, everyones score is bad, so there is no need to feel bad. You can get a lot better quickly (I started without the bumpers, and throughout my first 4 or so years my average went up 10-20 pins a year). And I have found an aspies sense of consentration can help out a lot in bowling. Now heres the one problem, there will be an occasional melt down... trust me it happened to me a lot, but the kid will want to forge through and the melt downs will end after a year or two (when the really really bad games start to end).

From: heidi.guarino@...Date: Mon, 4 May 2009 18:33:17 +0000Subject: ( ) T-Ball

Hi everyone, I haven't posted in a while, but I read everyone's comments every day and find them both useful and hopeful. My son Owen is nearly 6, was diagnosed about 2 years ago and generally does extremely well. He has his quirks, but he's extremely social, easy to move from one thing to another and generally very agreeable. It's T-ball season, and my husband was eager to get him involved, now that he's the right age. So two weeks ago we participated in the city-wide parade for the whole Little League (T-ball, softball and baseball, so kids from 5-13), and Owen had a blast. In fact he got so excited when he met his teammates that he introduced himself to each one and held out his hand to shake with them. The coach's wife laughed and called him a future politician. This past Saturday was the first game and things didn't go very well. Owen was excited to go, but once we got there he just wouldn't concentrate or focus on the game. While he was in the outfield he wandered around, sat on 3rd base and kept running off the field. When it was his turn to bat he ran the wrong way and then just got bored and walked off the field. About halfway through the game he decided he just "couldn't play" and sat in the dugout alone. It was heartbreaking to watch. We've talked him through the game multiple times, my husband is constantly trying to get him outside to play catch so he can get used to the concept of using a glove, and one of his classmates is even on his team. I'm not sure how we can get him more interested/involved in the game - part of me just wants to write it off and assume it's just not his thing; the other part of me doesn't want to let him give up that easily and insist that he keep trying. Any suggestions for ways to make this easier and ultimately more fun for everyone? Heidi

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[Guest guest]

Oh this brings back the memory of "oh we will try ball". It didn't go so well for us either. My Aspie couldn't stand the sun, the wind, the dust, or the feel of the glove on his hand. We went to one practice and decided it was us that wanted it more than he did. Now that his sister is in T-ball he enjoys watching and visiting the concession stand but has no desire to play. He is just as happy roaming around and watching everyone else. We as parents need to understand that that is just okay! My advice:don't beat yourself up so much and let this go. You will be much happier and so will your child.

Lori

From: hguarino <heidi.guarino@...>Subject: ( ) T-Ball Date: Monday, May 4, 2009, 1:33 PM

Hi everyone, I haven't posted in a while, but I read everyone's comments every day and find them both useful and hopeful. My son Owen is nearly 6, was diagnosed about 2 years ago and generally does extremely well. He has his quirks, but he's extremely social, easy to move from one thing to another and generally very agreeable. It's T-ball season, and my husband was eager to get him involved, now that he's the right age. So two weeks ago we participated in the city-wide parade for the whole Little League (T-ball, softball and baseball, so kids from 5-13), and Owen had a blast. In fact he got so excited when he met his teammates that he introduced himself to each one and held out his hand to shake with them. The coach's wife laughed and called him a future politician. This past Saturday was the first game and things didn't go very well. Owen was excited to go, but once we got there he just wouldn't concentrate

or focus on the game. While he was in the outfield he wandered around, sat on 3rd base and kept running off the field. When it was his turn to bat he ran the wrong way and then just got bored and walked off the field. About halfway through the game he decided he just "couldn't play" and sat in the dugout alone. It was heartbreaking to watch. We've talked him through the game multiple times, my husband is constantly trying to get him outside to play catch so he can get used to the concept of using a glove, and one of his classmates is even on his team. I'm not sure how we can get him more interested/involved in the game - part of me just wants to write it off and assume it's just not his thing; the other part of me doesn't want to let him give up that easily and insist that he keep trying. Any suggestions for ways to make this easier and ultimately more fun for everyone?

Heidi------------------------------------

[Guest guest]

I CAN RELATE COMPLETELY. Thanks for sharing

From:

[mailto: ] On

Behalf Of lori jennings

Sent: Tuesday, May 05, 2009 3:31 PM

Subject: Re: ( ) T-Ball

Oh this brings back the memory of " oh we will try

ball " . It didn't go so well for us either. My Aspie couldn't stand the

sun, the wind, the dust, or the feel of the glove on his hand. We went to one

practice and decided it was us that wanted it more than he did. Now that his

sister is in T-ball he enjoys watching and visiting the concession stand but

has no desire to play. He is just as happy roaming around and watching

everyone else. We as parents need to understand that that is just okay! My

advice:don't beat yourself up so much and let this go. You will be much

happier and so will your child.

Lori

From: hguarino <heidi.guarino@...>

Subject: ( ) T-Ball

Date: Monday, May 4, 2009, 1:33 PM

Hi everyone,

I haven't posted in a while, but I read everyone's comments every day and

find them both useful and hopeful. My son Owen is nearly 6, was diagnosed

about 2 years ago and generally does extremely well. He has his quirks, but

he's extremely social, easy to move from one thing to another and generally

very agreeable.

It's T-ball season, and my husband was eager to get him involved, now that

he's the right age. So two weeks ago we participated in the city-wide parade

for the whole Little League (T-ball, softball and baseball, so kids from

5-13), and Owen had a blast. In fact he got so excited when he met his

teammates that he introduced himself to each one and held out his hand to

shake with them. The coach's wife laughed and called him a future politician.

This past Saturday was the first game and things didn't go very well. Owen

was excited to go, but once we got there he just wouldn't concentrate or

focus on the game. While he was in the outfield he wandered around, sat on

3rd base and kept running off the field. When it was his turn to bat he ran

the wrong way and then just got bored and walked off the field. About halfway

through the game he decided he just " couldn't play " and sat in the

dugout alone.

It was heartbreaking to watch. We've talked him through the game multiple

times, my husband is constantly trying to get him outside to play catch so he

can get used to the concept of using a glove, and one of his classmates is

even on his team. I'm not sure how we can get him more interested/involved in

the game - part of me just wants to write it off and assume it's just not his

thing; the other part of me doesn't want to let him give up that easily and

insist that he keep trying.

Any suggestions for ways to make this easier and ultimately more fun for

everyone?

Heidi

------------------------------------

[Guest guest]

I too can relate! My AS/ADHD son, 5 at the time, consented to playing Flag Football on the local YMCA team... and he too was really excited and enthusiastic.During his first practice I saw much of the same behaviors you wrote about your boy, Owen. My Liam ran the wrong way, tried to start conversations with his own and the opposing team members, and sat down in the middle of the playing field-- during the game. He got knocked down while standing there during a play, trying to chat with the coach. Thankfully he wasn't injured, just surprised. I let him quit because he wasn't enjoying it and didn't have the focus or ability, really, to play at the time.To you, I would say, do what you think is best. -A> > > From: hguarino heidi.guarino@...> Subject: ( ) T-Ball> > Date: Monday, May 4, 2009, 1:33 PM> > Hi everyone, > > I haven't posted in a while, but I read everyone's comments> every day and find them both useful and hopeful. My son Owen is nearly> 6, was diagnosed about 2 years ago and generally does extremely well. He> has his quirks, but he's extremely social, easy to move from one thing> to another and generally very agreeable. > > It's T-ball season, and my husband was eager to get him> involved, now that he's the right age. So two weeks ago we participated> in the city-wide parade for the whole Little League (T-ball, softball> and baseball, so kids from 5-13), and Owen had a blast. In fact he got> so excited when he met his teammates that he introduced himself to each> one and held out his hand to shake with them. The coach's wife laughed> and called him a future politician. > > This past Saturday was the first game and things didn't go very> well. Owen was excited to go, but once we got there he just wouldn't> concentrate or focus on the game. While he was in the outfield he> wandered around, sat on 3rd base and kept running off the field. When it> was his turn to bat he ran the wrong way and then just got bored and> walked off the field. About halfway through the game he decided he just> "couldn't play" and sat in the dugout alone. > > It was heartbreaking to watch. We've talked him through the game> multiple times, my husband is constantly trying to get him outside to> play catch so he can get used to the concept of using a glove, and one> of his classmates is even on his team. I'm not sure how we can get him> more interested/involved in the game - part of me just wants to write it> off and assume it's just not his thing; the other part of me doesn't> want to let him give up that easily and insist that he keep trying. > > Any suggestions for ways to make this easier and ultimately more> fun for everyone? > > Heidi> > > > ------------------------------------> >

[Guest guest]

You could try swimming as a sport. This is the only sport my son is capable of doing. His neurologist told us that this is one sport that a lot of his patients have some success with. It's kind of like a team sport you do alone and between races you can talk and enjoy the concession stand.

From: Amber Wolfe <amberbloodwolfe@...>Subject: Re: ( ) T-Ball Date: Monday, May 11, 2009, 7:43 AM

I too can relate! My AS/ADHD son, 5 at the time, consented to playing Flag Football on the local YMCA team... and he too was really excited and enthusiastic.During his first practice I saw much of the same behaviors you wrote about your boy, Owen. My Liam ran the wrong way, tried to start conversations with his own and the opposing team members, and sat down in the middle of the playing field-- during the game. He got knocked down while standing there during a play, trying to chat with the coach. Thankfully he wasn't injured, just surprised. I let him quit because he wasn't enjoying it and didn't have the focus or ability, really, to play at the time.To you, I would say, do what you think is best. -A> > > From: hguarino heidi.guarino@ ...> Subject: ( ) T-Ball> > Date: Monday, May 4, 2009, 1:33 PM> > Hi everyone, > > I haven't posted in a while, but I read everyone's comments> every day and find them both useful and hopeful. My son Owen is nearly> 6, was diagnosed about 2 years ago and generally does extremely well. He> has his quirks, but he's extremely social, easy to move from one thing> to another and generally very agreeable. > > It's T-ball season, and my husband was eager to get him> involved, now that he's the right age. So two weeks ago we participated> in the city-wide parade for

the whole Little League (T-ball, softball> and baseball, so kids from 5-13), and Owen had a blast. In fact he got> so excited when he met his teammates that he introduced himself to each> one and held out his hand to shake with them. The coach's wife laughed> and called him a future politician. > > This past Saturday was the first game and things didn't go very> well. Owen was excited to go, but once we got there he just wouldn't> concentrate or focus on the game. While he was in the outfield he> wandered around, sat on 3rd base and kept running off the field. When it> was his turn to bat he ran the wrong way and then just got bored and> walked off the field. About halfway through the game he decided he just> "couldn't play" and sat in the dugout alone. > > It was heartbreaking to watch. We've talked him through the game> multiple times, my husband

is constantly trying to get him outside to> play catch so he can get used to the concept of using a glove, and one> of his classmates is even on his team. I'm not sure how we can get him> more interested/involved in the game - part of me just wants to write it> off and assume it's just not his thing; the other part of me doesn't> want to let him give up that easily and insist that he keep trying. > > Any suggestions for ways to make this easier and ultimately more> fun for everyone? > > Heidi> > > > ------------ --------- --------- ------> >