Re: How does your child reduce stress?

[Guest guest]

Thanks Ruth! It just went beyond a special interest to be like an addict needing

a fix. Demanding, explosive. Wow the suffering.

The stimulation overload must be intense for my daughter.

But life in general is not safe for her. Everywhere seems too much.

thanks for the insight! Pam

[Guest guest]

This sounds like OCD behavior to me. We dealt with it via meds.

Roxanna

"Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself." ~ Mark Twain

( ) How does your child reduce stress?

Help! What is this? Is this Aspie behavior? Depression/Anxiety? My daughter can't find satisfication in just a simple activity.She has to have an object to think about buying/collecting "that day" as a way to cope with each and every day and manage herstress and anxiety. The more stressed she is with school more "obessed" emotional demanding she will be to have a new thing (and the new thing will be unreasonable) to help her feel better. This is just a general way of being. The behavioral method that really curbs this behavior is to reduce stimulation, reduce stress and this strategy does sound like Aspie behavior method to me. Not too much stress in her life we can agree on a small token to get thru the day (library book, novel food purchase she makes). We also give her an allowance to spend to limit spending. No advances and limit purchases to Friday. But this won't stop the emotional outburst and demanding to have the thing if she is stressed from being out in the world. She is using purchases as a way to cope with stress apparently. How common is this? How does your AS child reduce stress. Is your AS child trying to control your life as a way to control there stress? Or am I just lucky :)Pam

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[Guest guest]

Gosh it is bad. See she use to hyperfocus on catalogs and TV

as a way to get thru the day. More and more though she interacts

with me. This is good. But the bad part it has to be some

object we are going to get. And as she gets older it is getting more

complicated. I do try to make lists. Lists are good.

But she can't cope and even though I am not running out and buying everything

she is still having meltdowns maybe 4-5 times

a day over an idea she has to wait on until I get her focused on something.

Pam

> }

> } The intense interests/obsessions are of course very common as that is part =

> } of the dx criteria for AS. What is unusual for the special interest to be =

> } SHOPPING. Wow! Actually, you are not the first one on this list to bring =

> } this up as a problem. You can't make special interests go away, and you pr=

> } obably don't want to. What you can do is help her expand it so it isn't so=

> } narrow and intense. Encourage her to learn about the things she is intere=

> } sted in buying, the technology, fashion or marketing behind them. Teach he=

> } r about economics and money. Let her learn about purchasing agents and oth=

> } er people who shop for a living. This sounds crazy, but you never know whe=

> } re it may lead.

>

> My little guy is often very interested in *advertising*, which I think

> is fabulous because it's such a great opportunity to dicuss how it

> can be used to manipulate people, and how not everything is true

> or completely true. He also has periods of being fascinated by products

> for younger kids - one of his rewards for good behavior at school used

> to be the teacher's school supply catalogs. Currently, he likes to do

> math problems and his reward is workbooks. ;-)

>

> Perhaps your daughter could enjoy browsing catalogs and making wish lists?

> (I used to really love this too.) Or would it be necessary for her to buy

> something to feel relaxed?

>

> Willa

>

[Guest guest]

Is she on any type of medication? Zoloft might help with this obsession. Can you get her into drawing...pencil and paper....crafts....or swimming or riding a bike...

The other thing is don't give in....let her have her melt downs as long as she is safe....I have been saying NO to my son....it is hard...but he has to learn...we are not going to drop everything and run to the store right now to buy a video game or whatever...especially since he won't do the same for us when we ask him to do something. We also make sure we point this out to him.

It is hard ...beleive me....and it might get worse before it starts to get better...in fact, I know it will get worse.

jan

Janice Rushen

"I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope"

From: susanonderko <susanonderko@...>Subject: ( ) Re: How does your child reduce stress? Date: Friday, May 1, 2009, 1:05 AM

Gosh it is bad. See she use to hyperfocus on catalogs and TVas a way to get thru the day. More and more though she interactswith me. This is good. But the bad part it has to be some object we are going to get. And as she gets older it is getting morecomplicated. I do try to make lists. Lists are good. But she can't cope and even though I am not running out and buying everything she is still having meltdowns maybe 4-5 times a day over an idea she has to wait on until I get her focused on something. Pam > } > } The intense interests/obsession s are of course very common as that is part =>

} of the dx criteria for AS. What is unusual for the special interest to be => } SHOPPING. Wow! Actually, you are not the first one on this list to bring => } this up as a problem. You can't make special interests go away, and you pr=> } obably don't want to. What you can do is help her expand it so it isn't so=> } narrow and intense. Encourage her to learn about the things she is intere=> } sted in buying, the technology, fashion or marketing behind them. Teach he=> } r about economics and money. Let her learn about purchasing agents and oth=> } er people who shop for a living. This sounds crazy, but you never know whe=> } re it may lead.> > My little guy is often very interested in *advertising* , which I think> is fabulous because it's such a great opportunity to dicuss how it> can be used to manipulate people, and how not everything is true> or completely

true. He also has periods of being fascinated by products> for younger kids - one of his rewards for good behavior at school used> to be the teacher's school supply catalogs. Currently, he likes to do> math problems and his reward is workbooks. ;-)> > Perhaps your daughter could enjoy browsing catalogs and making wish lists?> (I used to really love this too.) Or would it be necessary for her to buy> something to feel relaxed?> > Willa>