Guest guest Posted May 15, 2009 Report Share Posted May 15, 2009 NO...you don't have to accept this...they need to work around you ...not you working around them...give them dates and stick to it...it is important to have your husband there. Make it after school or real early ....they need to accommodate you! Stick to your guns! Jan Janice Rushen "I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope" From: lamhunter <lamhunter@...>Subject: ( ) IEP Meeting question Date: Friday, May 15, 2009, 8:44 AM We have been working on my son's IEP for next year and have a question. We have had 3 meeting so far and a 4 meeting scheduled. My husband is unable to attend the next meeting unexpectedly. When I requested a new meeting I was told that all the persons that need to be there were only available on the specfic date. I thought to myself it is equal important that my husband is there is part of the team. I even requested if we could schedule early part of June. But again was told that case manager was would be out of town and works during the summer. Do I have to just except this answer? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 15, 2009 Report Share Posted May 15, 2009 No, you don't have to accept their date. That is why they send the notice, so that you can reject the date. That said, however, everyone does need to work together so that a date can be reached. Ask if there is a date that most people can be there, and see if you can live without one of them. However, how would you feel if your husband could send a list of conscerns and questions with you? Are you a shy person, or do you feel like you could stand up for your son's rights by yourself? Could your husband make a cell phone call during the meeting? Could you take a friend who knows your child and things about AS? Make whatever decision you feel you can live with. The school does have to work with you, but remember that the " school " is made of lots of individual people who have individual lives, too. Good Luck. ah > > We have been working on my son's IEP for next year and have a question. We have had 3 meeting so far and a 4 meeting scheduled. My husband is unable to attend the next meeting unexpectedly. When I requested a new meeting I was told that all the persons that need to be there were only available on the specfic date. > > I thought to myself it is equal important that my husband is there is part of the team. I even requested if we could schedule early part of June. But again was told that case manager was would be out of town and works during the summer. > > Do I have to just except this answer? > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 16, 2009 Report Share Posted May 16, 2009 > > NO...you don't have to accept this...they need to work around you ...not you working around them...give them dates and stick to it...it is important to have your husband there. Make it after school or real early ....they need to accommodate you! Stick to your guns! ITA, and I just want to add that it might help considerably to put your request in writing. Make sure you get it to the official meeting coordinator, not just the secretary making appointments. You might also chat with the special ed director(s) and let them know of the problem. They might also be willing to iron it out. Certainly the case worker can take some time off her summer job to come to a meeting! Ruth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2009 Report Share Posted May 18, 2009 They are supposed to make every effort to schedule a meeting at a time convenient for you all. They can't really say, "this is the only time, take it or leave it." I don't recommend that you go alone either. So I would write back and give them several dates and times that you both CAN be there and wait for a response. Get things in writing to show that you are trying to make this work and they aren't. 4 IEP meetings seems like a heck of lot of meetings. Sometimes you can cut down on actual meeting time by discussing issues directly with certain people in advance. For instance, I request the proposed IEP is sent to me before the meeting. Then I can go through it and see what I like, don't like and what should be added or taken off. If there are a lot of problems with the IEP, you can email or call or meet with just the one person to take care of some of those issues outside of the larger formal meeting. I have sent in my own information that i want on the IEP and the sped teacher has then put it all together and sent me the draft - we agreed, then we had an official meeting with everyone to go over it all. It was a shorter meeting that way. And all the concerns are discussed to everyone's satisfaction. You can do conference calls as well, if that helps. Roxanna Autism Happens ( ) IEP Meeting question We have been working on my son's IEP for next year and have a question. We have had 3 meeting so far and a 4 meeting scheduled. My husband is unable to attend the next meeting unexpectedly. When I requested a new meeting I was told that all the persons that need to be there were only available on the specfic date. I thought to myself it is equal important that my husband is there is part of the team. I even requested if we could schedule early part of June. But again was told that case manager was would be out of town and works during the summer. Do I have to just except this answer? We found the real 'Hotel California' and the 'Seinfeld' diner. What will you find? Explore WhereItsAt.com. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2009 Report Share Posted May 18, 2009 Roxanna Thank you so much for you input the reason the IEP is taking so long is because this has been a very difficult year for my son. And his previous IEP's have been a mess. Even though we have medical diagnois of Asperger's/Depression and Aniexty they think he is just being defiant. And they don't think his has aniexties about school even though we have medical professionals backing it up. The social worker at school sat with him for 20 minutes in the beginning and she told me that he told her he didn't have any aniexties about school. Did she really think he was going to up open with her in 20 minutes? They filed truancy on him for educational neglect after we had so many problems even getting him at to school. We finally had to put him on homebound for medical reasons. I actually had a gal from DMH and a gentelman that has started a non-profit org for child with Aspergers start attending all these meeting with me. Because they always came out smelling like a rose and that we were the bad guys. If I sound frustrated and angry it is because I am. But I am working on that. Thanks > > > They are supposed to make every effort to schedule a meeting at a time convenient for you all.? They can't really say, " this is the only time, take it or leave it. " ? I don't recommend that you go alone either.? So I would write back and give them several dates and times that you both CAN be there and wait for a response.? Get things in writing to show that you are trying to make this work and they aren't.? > > 4 IEP meetings seems like a heck of lot of meetings.? Sometimes you can cut down on actual meeting time by discussing issues directly with certain people in advance.? For instance, I request the proposed IEP is sent to me before the meeting.? Then I can go through it and see what I like, don't like and what should be added or taken off.? If there are a lot of problems with the IEP, you can email or call or meet with just the one person to take care of some of those issues outside of the larger formal meeting.? I have sent in my own information that i want on the IEP and the sped teacher has then put it all together and sent me the draft - we agreed, then we had an official meeting with everyone to go over it all.? It was a shorter meeting that way.? And all the concerns are discussed to everyone's satisfaction. > > You can do conference calls as well, if that helps.? > > > > > > ?Roxanna > > Autism Happens > > > > > > > ( ) IEP Meeting question > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > We have been working on my son's IEP for next year and have a question. We have had 3 meeting so far and a 4 meeting scheduled. My husband is unable to attend the next meeting unexpectedly. When I requested a new meeting I was told that all the persons that need to be there were only available on the specfic date. > > > > I thought to myself it is equal important that my husband is there is part of the team. I even requested if we could schedule early part of June. But again was told that case manager was would be out of town and works during the summer. > > > > Do I have to just except this answer? > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 Wow, sounds like you've been through the ringer with the school. That is so sad. Remember to back up everything you request with data and expect data from the school in return. Don't let them just say anything - ask questions! Where did they get the information/data, how did they get it, and like you mentioned, how long did they spend with him before deciding it. Also, you can start asking them for information on training for staff in regards to AS. Sounds like they need to learn a lot! Roxanna Autism Happens ( ) IEP Meeting question > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > We have been working on my son's IEP for next year and have a question. We have had 3 meeting so far and a 4 meeting scheduled. My husband is unable to attend the next meeting unexpectedly. When I requested a new meeting I was told that all the persons that need to be there were only available on the specfic date. > > > > I thought to myself it is equal important that my husband is there is part of the team. I even requested if we could schedule early part of June. But again was told that case manager was would be out of town and works during the summer. > > > > Do I have to just except this answer? > > > > > We found the real 'Hotel California' and the 'Seinfeld' diner. What will you find? Explore WhereItsAt.com. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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