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I had (still have somewhat) this problem with my husband. It delayed megetting

my son dx'ed and treated for almost a year. I really wish Ihadn't let him. But,

what finally started working is to spoon-feed himsmall amounts of info. My

husband only new about autism from the movie'Rain Man', so that's where his

perspective was coming from. It tooksome time and slow education, like pointing

out something my son didthat really frustrated him and being able to tell him

that was anexample of an AS behavior I had just read about in the book I

wasreading.. My DH did not/has not taken it upon himself to learn more, itall

has to come through me. He first agreed that there was 'something'wrong with

, then moved on to accepting that needed help with'some' things. He

finally accepted the HFA dx after meeting with theschool and listening to the

psychologist at the IEP meeting. I had toset that up all myself, take off of

work to drive everywhere heneeded to be, the evals, the meetings...Point

is, do what you feel youneed to do, and don't let your DH stop you. It is often

this way, wherethe mommy has to do all the work. Find out what your DH needs as

far aslearning/understanding what is going on. He may still be in a state

ofgrieving as well and is just not ready to come to terms. There are agreat many

books available - the Autism Sourcebook and Autism SpectrumDisorders talks a lot

about grieving/coping/healing. My DH would neversit down and actually read the

books, again, I had to spoon-feed him.They also helped me to understand more his

actions/non actions. I dothink that he still secretly thinks this is just

temporary, that our sonwill 'outgrow' it, so I'm working on that now...Hope this

helps.TJ

>

> Hi My name is Zapalac and I am new to the group. My son is 13

> and was just diagnosed with AS and everything else that comes along

> with it. I really need someone to talk to that knows what to do and

> how to handle it. My husband doesn't understand or should I say it

> doesn't want to. He thinks that my son is just being like this to

> irritate him. He thinks after one therapy session he should know

> better. They are just going at with each other in front of our other 2

> children and I had to remove my son and I from the situation so there

> would not be any more problems. But like most AS children they are out

> of there comfort zone so they don't know how to act. I don't know how to get

my husband to

> understand. We have only gone to one session but I fell like it is not

> fair for the other 2 children (4 and 2) for there time to be ruined.

> I feel helpless. Can you help me please.

> Thank you,

>

>