Guest guest Posted February 25, 2010 Report Share Posted February 25, 2010 Sue, Here in KS we have a social skills group but I don't send my daughter because it is once a week and $85.00 each session. We just can't afford it as well. I know how you feel. Patty ( ) Support Groups Charge Wondered if it is usual to charge for support groups and social skills classes? Has anyone else encountered that? I finally found a local resource that will do some adult (18-40) social skills groups, but you have to pay about $400. DS has no insurance because he's had not job for 7 months and now is only 18 hours a week...but just don't know if it is worth it. What are they going to say that I haven't been trying to cram in his little head for 25 years?Sue in Tn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 26, 2010 Report Share Posted February 26, 2010 In DE my ds attends a social skills class once a week (1 hr) that is $30. I guess that is not terrible, and he really loves it. > > Wondered if it is usual to charge for support groups and social skills classes? Has anyone else encountered that? I finally found a local resource that will do some adult (18-40) social skills groups, but you have to pay about $400. DS has no insurance because he's had not job for 7 months and now is only 18 hours a week...but just don't know if it is worth it. What are they going to say that I haven't been trying to cram in his little head for 25 years? > > Sue in Tn > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 26, 2010 Report Share Posted February 26, 2010 Hi Sue, We haven't encountered support groups that charge, but any social skills groups outside of school charge.....and big time. As you found out. And,,,even though we have insurance, ours won't pay for the social skills groups. Ugh. Makes no sense!!!!!! It reminds me of when, years ago, insurance wouldn't pay for birth control pills but it would pay for a baby. Makes no sense. It really is simple. Just treat others kindly and with respect. Robin From: Mimi <sue@...>Subject: ( ) Support Groups Charge Date: Thursday, February 25, 2010, 12:08 PM Wondered if it is usual to charge for support groups and social skills classes? Has anyone else encountered that? I finally found a local resource that will do some adult (18-40) social skills groups, but you have to pay about $400. DS has no insurance because he's had not job for 7 months and now is only 18 hours a week...but just don't know if it is worth it. What are they going to say that I haven't been trying to cram in his little head for 25 years?Sue in Tn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 26, 2010 Report Share Posted February 26, 2010 Oh that is GREAT! My son would not go at all.... I do know they have social groups at our local college...check out the colleges (if there are any) by you. Jan From: kelliangelini <kelliangelini@...> Sent: Fri, February 26, 2010 8:23:48 AMSubject: ( ) Re: Support Groups Charge In DE my ds attends a social skills class once a week (1 hr) that is $30. I guess that is not terrible, and he really loves it.>> Wondered if it is usual to charge for support groups and social skills classes? Has anyone else encountered that? I finally found a local resource that will do some adult (18-40) social skills groups, but you have to pay about $400. DS has no insurance because he's had not job for 7 months and now is only 18 hours a week...but just don't know if it is worth it. What are they going to say that I haven't been trying to cram in his little head for 25 years?> > Sue in Tn> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 27, 2010 Report Share Posted February 27, 2010 We pay $50 per one hour weekly session. It's been very useful for us. My 11 year old DS is going through his third session right now. The practice that holds them usually has people pay in advance in one lump sum. While I'm not getting a discount, I did at least get arrangements to pay per session instead of coming up with $450 all at once. No doubt groups vary widely. So in addition to the cost issue, I would recommend looking very closely at who is teaching it, his qualifications and experience, what is being taught, and the make up of the group. Even is you are able to get a discounted rate, you'll still entitled to that kind of information. Best wishes, Bronwyn > ( ) Support Groups Charge > > > > > > Wondered if it is usual to charge for support groups and social skills classes? Has anyone else encountered that? I finally found a local resource that will do some adult (18-40) social skills groups, but you have to pay about $400. DS has no insurance because he's had not job for 7 months and now is only 18 hours a week...but just don't know if it is worth it. What are they going to say that I haven't been trying to cram in his little head for 25 years? > > Sue in Tn > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 28, 2010 Report Share Posted February 28, 2010 Thanks to everyone for replies on social skills groups and the associated charges. I guess this one is a deal at $25/session. I am not going to agree to the whole eight sessions though until I see the first one and who and how it is run. The last time I went to one of their programs for adult social groups, DS was out of town in school so I went to see what it was like. It was all parents except for one young adult man. As we went around the table and introduced ourselves, in addition to giving his name he added that he was a convicted sex offender. My jaw dropped, apparently all the other parents knew this, but I didn’t think that was the kind of group I was looking for. His mom was sitting there beside him too when he announced that! Well, we’ll go Monday and see what it is like. Again thanks. Sue in TN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 28, 2010 Report Share Posted February 28, 2010 OMG!! My jaw dropped too!! Reconfirms how important it is to check them out thoroughly!! From: Sue Lowery <sue@...>Subject: Re: ( ) Support Groups Charge Date: Sunday, February 28, 2010, 8:54 AM Thanks to everyone for replies on social skills groups and the associated charges. I guess this one is a deal at $25/session. I am not going to agree to the whole eight sessions though until I see the first one and who and how it is run. The last time I went to one of their programs for adult social groups, DS was out of town in school so I went to see what it was like. It was all parents except for one young adult man. As we went around the table and introduced ourselves, in addition to giving his name he added that he was a convicted sex offender. My jaw dropped, apparently all the other parents knew this, but I didn’t think that was the kind of group I was looking for. His mom was sitting there beside him too when he announced that! Well, we’ll go Monday and see what it is like. Again thanks. Sue in TN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 28, 2010 Report Share Posted February 28, 2010 sue...not to be critical...it may not be the group for you son....but at least this young adult is admitting his problems and crying out for help...and his mom is there to support him. I know things like that frighten us...but we can't judge...just be there to support and help...just like Jesus loved and accepted the prostitute at the well. And, please don't think i am judging you..cause I am not...the world is very frightening now...but we need to help others just like others need to help our children and accept them. bless you. jan I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope From: Sue Lowery <sue@...> Sent: Sun, February 28, 2010 9:54:29 AMSubject: Re: ( ) Support Groups Charge Thanks to everyone for replies on social skills groups and the associated charges. I guess this one is a deal at $25/session. I am not going to agree to the whole eight sessions though until I see the first one and who and how it is run. The last time I went to one of their programs for adult social groups, DS was out of town in school so I went to see what it was like. It was all parents except for one young adult man. As we went around the table and introduced ourselves, in addition to giving his name he added that he was a convicted sex offender. My jaw dropped, apparently all the other parents knew this, but I didn’t think that was the kind of group I was looking for. His mom was sitting there beside him too when he announced that! Well, we’ll go Monday and see what it is like. Again thanks. Sue in TN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 28, 2010 Report Share Posted February 28, 2010 Personally, I would not want my son in a social skills support group with a convicted sex offender, even if the person's mom was there to support him. Doesn't mean I have contempt for the guy, but that is just too much. "Over-optimism is waiting for you ship to come in when you haven't sent one out." From: rushen janice <jrushen@...> Sent: Sun, February 28, 2010 9:53:45 AMSubject: Re: ( ) Support Groups Charge sue...not to be critical...it may not be the group for you son....but at least this young adult is admitting his problems and crying out for help...and his mom is there to support him. I know things like that frighten us...but we can't judge...just be there to support and help...just like Jesus loved and accepted the prostitute at the well. And, please don't think i am judging you..cause I am not...the world is very frightening now...but we need to help others just like others need to help our children and accept them. bless you. jan I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope From: Sue Lowery <suelowerydesign (DOT) com> Sent: Sun, February 28, 2010 9:54:29 AMSubject: Re: ( ) Support Groups Charge Thanks to everyone for replies on social skills groups and the associated charges. I guess this one is a deal at $25/session. I am not going to agree to the whole eight sessions though until I see the first one and who and how it is run. The last time I went to one of their programs for adult social groups, DS was out of town in school so I went to see what it was like. It was all parents except for one young adult man. As we went around the table and introduced ourselves, in addition to giving his name he added that he was a convicted sex offender. My jaw dropped, apparently all the other parents knew this, but I didn’t think that was the kind of group I was looking for. His mom was sitting there beside him too when he announced that! Well, we’ll go Monday and see what it is like. Again thanks. Sue in TN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 28, 2010 Report Share Posted February 28, 2010 IS IT LEGAL FOR HIM TO BE AROUND CHILDREN? I would be checking on-line for THAT. Also, I WOULD BE CHECKING TO MAKE SURE HE CAN BE AROUND CHILDREN!!!! He may be in violation of HIS requirements; I AM PRETTY SURE WE CAN GET THAT INFORMATION ON LINE (otherwise, I would be checking in to it before I WOULD HAVE MY CHILD ANYWHERE AROUND HIM but that is just me). In IOWA, you can urinate in public (IT IS TRUE) and be required to register as a sex offender, and sorry, but if that is WHY he is registered, like what male hasn't done that, and seems my feelings would be different than if he was a child molester registered as a sex offender! So, I don't know your state's law, but just to throw that out there, because it IS like that in SOME STATES. Ruthie From: smacalli@...Date: Sun, 28 Feb 2010 10:59:22 -0800Subject: Re: ( ) Support Groups Charge Personally, I would not want my son in a social skills support group with a convicted sex offender, even if the person's mom was there to support him. Doesn't mean I have contempt for the guy, but that is just too much. "Over-optimism is waiting for you ship to come in when you haven't sent one out." From: rushen janice <jrushen > Sent: Sun, February 28, 2010 9:53:45 AMSubject: Re: ( ) Support Groups Charge sue...not to be critical...it may not be the group for you son....but at least this young adult is admitting his problems and crying out for help...and his mom is there to support him. I know things like that frighten us...but we can't judge...just be there to support and help...just like Jesus loved and accepted the prostitute at the well. And, please don't think i am judging you..cause I am not...the world is very frightening now...but we need to help others just like others need to help our children and accept them. bless you. jan I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope From: Sue Lowery <suelowerydesign (DOT) com> Sent: Sun, February 28, 2010 9:54:29 AMSubject: Re: ( ) Support Groups Charge Thanks to everyone for replies on social skills groups and the associated charges. I guess this one is a deal at $25/session. I am not going to agree to the whole eight sessions though until I see the first one and who and how it is run. The last time I went to one of their programs for adult social groups, DS was out of town in school so I went to see what it was like. It was all parents except for one young adult man. As we went around the table and introduced ourselves, in addition to giving his name he added that he was a convicted sex offender. My jaw dropped, apparently all the other parents knew this, but I didn’t think that was the kind of group I was looking for. His mom was sitting there beside him too when he announced that! Well, we’ll go Monday and see what it is like. Again thanks. Sue in TN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 28, 2010 Report Share Posted February 28, 2010 I signed my son up for a social skills group for kids age 8-10 yrs... He had his third class today and seems to enjoy it .. always comes out laughing and in a good mood. They are practicing play skills as well as conversational skills... It's my understanding that folks on the spectrum need to learn these skills over and over - particularly at different points in their lives as the needs of their daily lives change... The cost was the cheapest I found at $30 per session for 15 sessions but I applied for financial aid and get 50% off. > > Wondered if it is usual to charge for support groups and social skills classes? Has anyone else encountered that? I finally found a local resource that will do some adult (18-40) social skills groups, but you have to pay about $400. DS has no insurance because he's had not job for 7 months and now is only 18 hours a week...but just don't know if it is worth it. What are they going to say that I haven't been trying to cram in his little head for 25 years? > > Sue in Tn > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 2, 2010 Report Share Posted March 2, 2010 Well, DS and I went to Social Skills Group for adults last night. I promised if he didn’t care for it, he wouldn’t have to go back…and he did not care for it. The “group” is only him and two other much older men, in late 30’s. They started with the most basic info on manners, which he certainly can benefit from a review, but he just was hoping for a larger and more diverse group with people nearer his age (25). I think I got more out of it (in another room) exchanging info with one of the psychologists from the organization. Overall, it seemed unplanned, at least in terms of who was attending, maybe we live in an area so small there aren’t enough adults to fill this group. I thought it was great to include a separate session for the parents, I got a lot of good information. I think he would benefit more from one-on-one, with someone that can teach him the “rules” of meeting, greeting, getting to know and forming relationships with girls in particular. I know there is a reason why they call it a “spectrum” but DS thought group needed more of a range. He was just SO different from the men in the group…so maybe there is a book that might help him. Myabe I should write it, LOL in my spare time.- Just found out yesterday that with new job he will get NO insurance. So, unless I can find someplace that will waive their fee, any one-on-one is not going to happen… Sue in TN From: [mailto: ] On Behalf Of Sue Lowery Sent: Sunday, February 28, 2010 9:54 AM To: Subject: Re: ( ) Support Groups Charge Thanks to everyone for replies on social skills groups and the associated charges. I guess this one is a deal at $25/session. I am not going to agree to the whole eight sessions though until I see the first one and who and how it is run. The last time I went to one of their programs for adult social groups, DS was out of town in school so I went to see what it was like. It was all parents except for one young adult man. As we went around the table and introduced ourselves, in addition to giving his name he added that he was a convicted sex offender. My jaw dropped, apparently all the other parents knew this, but I didn’t think that was the kind of group I was looking for. His mom was sitting there beside him too when he announced that! Well, we’ll go Monday and see what it is like. Again thanks. Sue in TN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 2, 2010 Report Share Posted March 2, 2010 LOL, I am going to try and not be too negative about the lack of services in TN… DS has the distinction of being the first one “purged” from the state’s DMRS wait list a couple of years ago. Course there were several THOUSAND people on the list ahead of him for services. That was under Dept. of Mental Retardation Svc (they have a new acronym now). There were NO services if you are an adult with autism. The state cited as the reason he was deleted, an IQ test that was clearly labeled “invalid” by the psychologist that administered it. Test showed his IQ (their criteria for acceptance) a few points above 70. Examiner said it was “invalid because of prompting.” There were several other that were below 70. But, they used that ONE to purge him from the list. I tried to fight it with a lawyer, I tried four and they all backed out saying they did business with state of TN… since there was little likelihood of services anyway, I just forgot about wasting any more time with them. So, he has no caseworker, in the judgment of the state, he is perfectly fine. Has never been formally diagnosed with HFA, I never even heard of it until he was 23, now with no insurance, how do you go about getting a diagnosis, who would pay for all the diagnosis, when there is nothing at the end anyway! I don’t think he would qualify for SSI, again, right in the middle of abilities. He can drive, he can work, but finding a job, a full time job WITH BENEFITS…that’s another matter. Tennessee is near the bottom of the barrel in services available. I am looking at TennCare which is like other state’s Medicare, but they just cut thousands, yes, thousands off of the rolls of TennCare. I have found that if you are an adult, unless you have had SSI since childhood it is just about impossible to get in our state. Thank goodness for his physician who prescribes his ADD meds and lets us pay out of pocket for every visit. I am not going to start a healthcare rant…I don’t like either plan that has been proposed or rejected right now in Congress, but there sure is a problem with people like my son (and me as self employed) getting healthcare coverage! He is still paying off an emergency room bill that was over $1,200 for treating a staff infection. The hospital did waive their part of the bill, but they hire private physicians to work the ER and they would not waive their part of the bill. He got 20% off. But is still paying on it every month, $25 at a time. There was not one single free or reduced clinic that would treat/see him for it. I called over twenty places and they either said “no” or they would make an appt. for seeing him in three weeks! He would have been dead. We are VERY, VERY lucky that he is so healthy for the most part. I don’t know what people do! I rant about this because it seems most of my friends who are insured through their companies, or kids are covered through their insurance have NO IDEA what they are could be facing. OK, my two cents worth. Sue From: [mailto: ] On Behalf Of Kate Stone Sent: Tuesday, March 02, 2010 9:53 AM To: Subject: Sue: RE: ( ) Support Groups Charge There should be some medical/support services available through his case worker (if he has one)... has he looked into adult disiblity services available through your County or State? From: Sue Lowery <suelowerydesign> Subject: RE: ( ) Support Groups Charge Date: Tuesday, March 2, 2010, 8:00 AM Well, DS and I went to Social Skills Group for adults last night. I promised if he didn’t care for it, he wouldn’t have to go back…and he did not care for it. The “group” is only him and two other much older men, in late 30’s. They started with the most basic info on manners, which he certainly can benefit from a review, but he just was hoping for a larger and more diverse group with people nearer his age (25). I think I got more out of it (in another room) exchanging info with one of the psychologists from the organization. Overall, it seemed unplanned, at least in terms of who was attending, maybe we live in an area so small there aren’t enough adults to fill this group. I thought it was great to include a separate session for the parents, I got a lot of good information. I think he would benefit more from one-on-one, with someone that can teach him the “rules” of meeting, greeting, getting to know and forming relationships with girls in particular. I know there is a reason why they call it a “spectrum” but DS thought group needed more of a range. He was just SO different from the men in the group…so maybe there is a book that might help him. Myabe I should write it, LOL in my spare time.- Just found out yesterday that with new job he will get NO insurance. So, unless I can find someplace that will waive their fee, any one-on-one is not going to happen… Sue in TN From: [mailto: ] On Behalf Of Sue Lowery Sent: Sunday, February 28, 2010 9:54 AM Subject: Re: ( ) Support Groups Charge Thanks to everyone for replies on social skills groups and the associated charges. I guess this one is a deal at $25/session. I am not going to agree to the whole eight sessions though until I see the first one and who and how it is run. The last time I went to one of their programs for adult social groups, DS was out of town in school so I went to see what it was like. It was all parents except for one young adult man. As we went around the table and introduced ourselves, in addition to giving his name he added that he was a convicted sex offender. My jaw dropped, apparently all the other parents knew this, but I didn’t think that was the kind of group I was looking for. His mom was sitting there beside him too when he announced that! Well, we’ll go Monday and see what it is like. Again thanks. Sue in TN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 2, 2010 Report Share Posted March 2, 2010 Great post, Sue. This just highlights so many of the problems we face with adult-sized kids. I am in Ohio and my ds does have a dx of autism and did qualify for help from the MR/DD system. (Yep, they are busy changing their name to get rid of the MR part...) But the problem is, they really only service the MR part. If one is not MR, one gets nothing. He had a case manager who met me once a year to write a yearly "life plan" which meant nothing, see ya next year. When he had to re-apply at age 18 (they must re-apply at several age intervals over the years), I did not bother. They would not have given him any real services and they did not do anything to help him the years he was a client of theirs. They have nothing for him. TI did apply for him to get in with the bureau of jobs something-something. That was a year ago and still no reply. lol. Not holding my breath. Roxanna "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." E. Burke Re: ( ) Support Groups Charge Thanks to everyone for replies on social skills groups and the associated charges. I guess this one is a deal at $25/session. I am not going to agree to the whole eight sessions though until I see the first one and who and how it is run. The last time I went to one of their programs for adult social groups, DS was out of town in school so I went to see what it was like. It was all parents except for one young adult man. As we went around the table and introduced ourselves, in addition to giving his name he added that he was a convicted sex offender. My jaw dropped, apparently all the other parents knew this, but I didn’t think that was the kind of group I was looking for. His mom was sitting there beside him too when he announced that! Well, we’ll go Monday and see what it is like. Again thanks. Sue in TN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 2, 2010 Report Share Posted March 2, 2010 Sue, I'm sorry for the mountain you've had to climb, with seemingly no top to reach. The one thing I can suggest about the legal issues, is the Disability Law Center. Also, I suggest a call to Pacer, they are a National Advocacy group, that has a wonderful supportive and knowledgeable staff who will work hard to find your son transitional services, legal advocacy and more. web addy is... www.pacer.org Your story makes me glad I live in a State with so many available services.. From: Sue Lowery <suelowerydesign (DOT) com>Subject: RE: ( ) Support Groups Charge Date: Tuesday, March 2, 2010, 8:00 AM Well, DS and I went to Social Skills Group for adults last night. I promised if he didn’t care for it, he wouldn’t have to go back…and he did not care for it. The “group†is only him and two other much older men, in late 30’s. They started with the most basic info on manners, which he certainly can benefit from a review, but he just was hoping for a larger and more diverse group with people nearer his age (25). I think I got more out of it (in another room) exchanging info with one of the psychologists from the organization. Overall, it seemed unplanned, at least in terms of who was attending, maybe we live in an area so small there aren’t enough adults to fill this group. I thought it was great to include a separate session for the parents, I got a lot of good information. I think he would benefit more from one-on-one, with someone that can teach him the “rules†of meeting, greeting, getting to know and forming relationships with girls in particular. I know there is a reason why they call it a “spectrum†but DS thought group needed more of a range. He was just SO different from the men in the group…so maybe there is a book that might help him. Myabe I should write it, LOL in my spare time.- Just found out yesterday that with new job he will get NO insurance. So, unless I can find someplace that will waive their fee, any one-on-one is not going to happen… Sue in TN From: [mailto:AspergersSu pport@group s.com] On Behalf Of Sue LowerySent: Sunday, February 28, 2010 9:54 AM Subject: Re: ( ) Support Groups Charge Thanks to everyone for replies on social skills groups and the associated charges. I guess this one is a deal at $25/session. I am not going to agree to the whole eight sessions though until I see the first one and who and how it is run. The last time I went to one of their programs for adult social groups, DS was out of town in school so I went to see what it was like. It was all parents except for one young adult man. As we went around the table and introduced ourselves, in addition to giving his name he added that he was a convicted sex offender. My jaw dropped, apparently all the other parents knew this, but I didn’t think that was the kind of group I was looking for. His mom was sitting there beside him too when he announced that! Well, we’ll go Monday and see what it is like. Again thanks. Sue in TN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 2, 2010 Report Share Posted March 2, 2010 Wow, you too Roxanna? Makes me very anxious about what the future holds. I wonder if legally filing for an 'adolescent extension due to disabilities' would be a good idea ~ In that case the parents would retain legal guardianship of the child until age 21; and as such they would continue to qualify under parents Health Ins., dependency tax credit, and all services available to familiesw/disabilities. Again, I believe the laws will vary State to State, but wow, no services at all for disabled adults???... seems preposterous!! I wonder if there's a Federal Program in Place?? From: Sue Lowery <suelowerydesign (DOT) com>Subject: RE: ( ) Support Groups Charge Date: Tuesday, March 2, 2010, 8:00 AM Well, DS and I went to Social Skills Group for adults last night. I promised if he didn’t care for it, he wouldn’t have to go back…and he did not care for it. The “group†is only him and two other much older men, in late 30’s. They started with the most basic info on manners, which he certainly can benefit from a review, but he just was hoping for a larger and more diverse group with people nearer his age (25). I think I got more out of it (in another room) exchanging info with one of the psychologists from the organization. Overall, it seemed unplanned, at least in terms of who was attending, maybe we live in an area so small there aren’t enough adults to fill this group. I thought it was great to include a separate session for the parents, I got a lot of good information. I think he would benefit more from one-on-one, with someone that can teach him the “rules†of meeting, greeting, getting to know and forming relationships with girls in particular. I know there is a reason why they call it a “spectrum†but DS thought group needed more of a range. He was just SO different from the men in the group…so maybe there is a book that might help him. Myabe I should write it, LOL in my spare time.- Just found out yesterday that with new job he will get NO insurance. So, unless I can find someplace that will waive their fee, any one-on-one is not going to happen… Sue in TN From: [mailto:AspergersSu pport@group s.com] On Behalf Of Sue LowerySent: Sunday, February 28, 2010 9:54 AM Subject: Re: ( ) Support Groups Charge Thanks to everyone for replies on social skills groups and the associated charges. I guess this one is a deal at $25/session. I am not going to agree to the whole eight sessions though until I see the first one and who and how it is run. The last time I went to one of their programs for adult social groups, DS was out of town in school so I went to see what it was like. It was all parents except for one young adult man. As we went around the table and introduced ourselves, in addition to giving his name he added that he was a convicted sex offender. My jaw dropped, apparently all the other parents knew this, but I didn’t think that was the kind of group I was looking for. His mom was sitting there beside him too when he announced that! Well, we’ll go Monday and see what it is like. Again thanks. Sue in TN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 2, 2010 Report Share Posted March 2, 2010 Thanks for the suggestions, again am trying to open eyes to other parents and not shoot down ideas. DLAC would not take his case…I went thru the ARC of Tennessee and they tried to work with me and DLAC. But everyone seemed to feel “so what if he went on the “list.” “There were thousands ahead of him “on the list” and they weren’t receiving services, and the ones that were getting anything, it was limited. I am blessed and thankful that he is so high functioning, but it is like balancing on a fence. I can nudge this way and emphasize disabilities and MAYBE find some help but that help seems to come with lots of strings attached such as getting SSI and the assets he would have to shed, such as the 401k money he accrued when he worked for four years and lived at home. He needs that savings cushion, and it is not a fortune, $3000 or less. But SSI would require him to spend it down and then limit what he can earn or lose SSI. Or I can nudge (push and shove is more like it) in the other direction. Trying to get him a full time job, learning a trade, living on his own, etc. which is what most parents want. But this healthcare issue is such an impediment for so many! How many creative, productive people would like to go start businesses but can’t because they are “Job-locked.” I heard that phrase the other day and thought what a perfect term. Tennessee has tried to start a lower-cost catastrophic plan, but catastrophe for them stops at $10,000. That is the max. And, they closed the rolls on that last January I believe and have not accepted new applicants. It is a mess. And I reread last post, I did mean a “staph” infection not “staff.” LOL, I get caught up in writing… On a happy note, he LOVES, LOVES his new job. Hope hours will increase and he can BUY insurance, even insurance that won’t cover his ADD (only medical problem he has, pre-existing condition!) His new boss posted on DS’s facebook page how nice it is to have such a “hard worker.” They seem to run this family but chain restaurant like all staff is family…DS and boss love Fifties and Sixties music, and DS took in all his Jerry Lee collection the second day on job so restaurant could play as they play that type music for customers. So I can endure all the other crap right now, until he gets sick and then I panic!!!! Sue in TN From: [mailto: ] On Behalf Of Kate Stone Sent: Tuesday, March 02, 2010 3:16 PM To: Subject: RE: RE: ( ) Support Groups Charge Sue, I'm sorry for the mountain you've had to climb, with seemingly no top to reach. The one thing I can suggest about the legal issues, is the Disability Law Center. Also, I suggest a call to Pacer, they are a National Advocacy group, that has a wonderful supportive and knowledgeable staff who will work hard to find your son transitional services, legal advocacy and more. web addy is... www.pacer.org Your story makes me glad I live in a State with so many available services.. From: Sue Lowery <suelowerydesign (DOT) com> Subject: RE: ( ) Support Groups Charge Date: Tuesday, March 2, 2010, 8:00 AM Well, DS and I went to Social Skills Group for adults last night. I promised if he didn’t care for it, he wouldn’t have to go back…and he did not care for it. The “group” is only him and two other much older men, in late 30’s. They started with the most basic info on manners, which he certainly can benefit from a review, but he just was hoping for a larger and more diverse group with people nearer his age (25). I think I got more out of it (in another room) exchanging info with one of the psychologists from the organization. Overall, it seemed unplanned, at least in terms of who was attending, maybe we live in an area so small there aren’t enough adults to fill this group. I thought it was great to include a separate session for the parents, I got a lot of good information. I think he would benefit more from one-on-one, with someone that can teach him the “rules” of meeting, greeting, getting to know and forming relationships with girls in particular. I know there is a reason why they call it a “spectrum” but DS thought group needed more of a range. He was just SO different from the men in the group…so maybe there is a book that might help him. Myabe I should write it, LOL in my spare time.- Just found out yesterday that with new job he will get NO insurance. So, unless I can find someplace that will waive their fee, any one-on-one is not going to happen… Sue in TN From: @ groups. com [mailto:AspergersSu pport@group s.com] On Behalf Of Sue Lowery Sent: Sunday, February 28, 2010 9:54 AM @ groups. com Subject: Re: ( ) Support Groups Charge Thanks to everyone for replies on social skills groups and the associated charges. I guess this one is a deal at $25/session. I am not going to agree to the whole eight sessions though until I see the first one and who and how it is run. The last time I went to one of their programs for adult social groups, DS was out of town in school so I went to see what it was like. It was all parents except for one young adult man. As we went around the table and introduced ourselves, in addition to giving his name he added that he was a convicted sex offender. My jaw dropped, apparently all the other parents knew this, but I didn’t think that was the kind of group I was looking for. His mom was sitting there beside him too when he announced that! Well, we’ll go Monday and see what it is like. Again thanks. Sue in TN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 3, 2010 Report Share Posted March 3, 2010 There are programs for disabled adults. But none of them that would be for people with HFA or AS. You'd have to be MR to get any services. Well, at least here that is what is happening. The services even vary by county in my state, to make things worse. In my county, the people are like, "This is what we got, does he fit in any of these programs?" But all the programming is designed for people who are MR. It's great for those who have kids/adult-sized kids who are MR. But mine are not MR. Roxanna "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." E. Burke Re: ( ) Support Groups Charge Thanks to everyone for replies on social skills groups and the associated charges. I guess this one is a deal at $25/session. I am not going to agree to the whole eight sessions though until I see the first one and who and how it is run. The last time I went to one of their programs for adult social groups, DS was out of town in school so I went to see what it was like. It was all parents except for one young adult man. As we went around the table and introduced ourselves, in addition to giving his name he added that he was a convicted sex offender. My jaw dropped, apparently all the other parents knew this, but I didn’t think that was the kind of group I was looking for. His mom was sitting there beside him too when he announced that! Well, we’ll go Monday and see what it is like. Again thanks. Sue in TN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 3, 2010 Report Share Posted March 3, 2010 Yay, Sue! I'm glad to hear the job is going well. Fingers crossed!! Roxanna "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." E. Burke Re: ( ) Support Groups Charge Thanks to everyone for replies on social skills groups and the associated charges. I guess this one is a deal at $25/session. I am not going to agree to the whole eight sessions though until I see the first one and who and how it is run. The last time I went to one of their programs for adult social groups, DS was out of town in school so I went to see what it was like. It was all parents except for one young adult man. As we went around the table and introduced ourselves, in addition to giving his name he added that he was a convicted sex offender. My jaw dropped, apparently all the other parents knew this, but I didn’t think that was the kind of group I was looking for. His mom was sitting there beside him too when he announced that! Well, we’ll go Monday and see what it is like. Again thanks. Sue in TN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 3, 2010 Report Share Posted March 3, 2010 You are exactly right there are programs for disabled adults, and part of the reason is because the parents of children/adults who were diagnosed as MR have yelled and screamed and worked their butts off to get attention and services. Not that we haven’t, we just have not been as loud for as long, or as organized, YET! They have “bonded” together as a community to change laws and get services. That is why I think it is important to let parents of younger children know now that we all need to be doing this. I am sure many of them already are, but that is how the MR community got the services. I do think it will change, but probably too late for DS, just like autism awareness, services, etc was all too late for him. I just started to make a sweeping generalization here, and am backing off. So, I’ll put as a question. Do you think it will be more difficult to get services because it is a “spectrum” and those diagnosed vary so widely with needs that go from help with college to others that are non-verbal and will perhaps need 24 hr care? Are people diagnosed as MR more “alike” generally in needs? Could that also be an impediment? What do others think on this? Sue in Tn From: [mailto: ] On Behalf Of Roxanna Sent: Wednesday, March 03, 2010 8:56 AM To: Subject: Re: ( ) Support Groups Charge There are programs for disabled adults. But none of them that would be for people with HFA or AS. You'd have to be MR to get any services. Well, at least here that is what is happening. The services even vary by county in my state, to make things worse. In my county, the people are like, " This is what we got, does he fit in any of these programs? " But all the programming is designed for people who are MR. It's great for those who have kids/adult-sized kids who are MR. But mine are not MR. Roxanna " The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing. " E. Burke -----Original Message----- From: Kate Stone <katesdishes > Sent: Tue, Mar 2, 2010 3:32 pm Subject: Re: ( ) Support Groups Charge Wow, you too Roxanna? Makes me very anxious about what the future holds. I wonder if legally filing for an 'adolescent extension due to disabilities' would be a good idea ~ In that case the parents would retain legal guardianship of the child until age 21; and as such they would continue to qualify under parents Health Ins., dependency tax credit, and all services available to familiesw/disabilities. Again, I believe the laws will vary State to State, but wow, no services at all for disabled adults???... seems preposterous!! I wonder if there's a Federal Program in Place?? From: Sue Lowery <suelowerydesign (DOT) com> Subject: RE: ( ) Support Groups Charge Date: Tuesday, March 2, 2010, 8:00 AM Well, DS and I went to Social Skills Group for adults last night. I promised if he didn’t care for it, he wouldn’t have to go back…and he did not care for it. The “group” is only him and two other much older men, in late 30’s. They started with the most basic info on manners, which he certainly can benefit from a review, but he just was hoping for a larger and more diverse group with people nearer his age (25). I think I got more out of it (in another room) exchanging info with one of the psychologists from the organization. Overall, it seemed unplanned, at least in terms of who was attending, maybe we live in an area so small there aren’t enough adults to fill this group. I thought it was great to include a separate session for the parents, I got a lot of good information. I think he would benefit more from one-on-one, with someone that can teach him the “rules” of meeting, greeting, getting to know and forming relationships with girls in particular. I know there is a reason why they call it a “spectrum” but DS thought group needed more of a range. He was just SO different from the men in the group…so maybe there is a book that might help him. Myabe I should write it, LOL in my spare time.- Just found out yesterday that with new job he will get NO insurance. So, unless I can find someplace that will waive their fee, any one-on-one is not going to happen… Sue in TN From: [mailto:AspergersSu pport@group s.com] On Behalf Of Sue Lowery Sent: Sunday, February 28, 2010 9:54 AM @ groups. com Subject: Re: ( ) Support Groups Charge Thanks to everyone for replies on social skills groups and the associated charges. I guess this one is a deal at $25/session. I am not going to agree to the whole eight sessions though until I see the first one and who and how it is run. The last time I went to one of their programs for adult social groups, DS was out of town in school so I went to see what it was like. It was all parents except for one young adult man. As we went around the table and introduced ourselves, in addition to giving his name he added that he was a convicted sex offender. My jaw dropped, apparently all the other parents knew this, but I didn’t think that was the kind of group I was looking for. His mom was sitting there beside him too when he announced that! Well, we’ll go Monday and see what it is like. Again thanks. Sue in TN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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