Re: defiance & meltdowns with shower every night

July 26, 2010

I don't have trouble getting my son in the bath, but I do have trouble getting

him out of it. And don't even ask him to clean his room--he's so oppositional

he'd rather I throw out all his stuff before he will clean it!

Ginger

>

> does anyone else have this problem?

>

> Every night our son is oppostional defiant, argumentative, and even has

meltdowns about getting in the shower (or bath). Once in, he doesn't want to

get out (and does the whole oppostional, defiant, meltdown thing again). So

frustrating

>

> Miranda

>

July 26, 2010

Yes! And I am ashamed to admit it is our 15 1/2 year old girl who won't shower or wash her hair without a fight. she used to fight brushing her hair too, until we had it cut short adn styled.. I do not understand it either.. I have decided to pick my battles with her.. and we are on at least a somewhat clean schedule. She does her hair 1-2 times a week and bathes maybe 2-3 times a week with cajoling.

( ) Re: defiance & meltdowns with shower every night

I don't have trouble getting my son in the bath, but I do have trouble getting him out of it. And don't even ask him to clean his room--he's so oppositional he'd rather I throw out all his stuff before he will clean it!Ginger>> does anyone else have this problem? > > Every night our son is oppostional defiant, argumentative, and even has meltdowns about getting in the shower (or bath). Once in, he doesn't want to get out (and does the whole oppostional, defiant, meltdown thing again). So frustrating> > Miranda>

July 26, 2010

that is normal for aspie kids they see it has change until they get use to the change this will happen but you can explain to the child what is happening and they will uselly accept what is happening.From: baileybear64 <baileybear64@...>Subject: ( ) defiance & meltdowns with shower every night Date: Sunday, 25 July, 2010, 7:23does anyone else have this problem? Every night our son is oppostional defiant, argumentative, and even has meltdowns about getting in the shower (or bath). Once in, he doesn't want to

get out (and does the whole oppostional, defiant, meltdown thing again). So frustratingMiranda------------------------------------

July 26, 2010

Miranda, this describes our daughter!!!

It's a job and half to get her in the bath and then a while later a nightmare to get her out again!!

Our OT says it is the sensory overload of going dry to wet (getting in) and then the thought of getting out wet and having to dry and dress (being sticky as dd describes it). When dd was younger DH invented the jet dryer where he would briskly and quite firmly rub her down all over whilst making auto car wash type noises and that helped greatly for a while although it didn;t solve the background issues. Talcum powder might help with the drying stage if you can find a texture/smell they can cope with. Getting in is bribed with toys (her choice from her collection of ponies) and bubbles and that helps a lot too - the desire for fun overrules the sensitivities to some extent. In recent times we have taken to timing dinner for fairly shortly (a reasonable amount of time for a "normal" person) after she gets out the bath so she has to race to get dryed and dressed without all the fuss or her food is cold... not ideal but it does help.

a

From: Ginger

Sent: Monday, July 26, 2010 3:14 PM

Subject: ( ) Re: defiance & meltdowns with shower every night

I don't have trouble getting my son in the bath, but I do have trouble getting him out of it. And don't even ask him to clean his room--he's so oppositional he'd rather I throw out all his stuff before he will clean it!Ginger>> does anyone else have this problem? > > Every night our son is oppostional defiant, argumentative, and even has meltdowns about getting in the shower (or bath). Once in, he doesn't want to get out (and does the whole oppostional, defiant, meltdown thing again). So frustrating> > Miranda>

July 26, 2010

Nope...my son is the total opposite...he is 14 ...loved baths...and now loves showers and when he gets in....we can't get him out...one time he was in there and fell asleep. He is the cleanest 14 year old around...now if I could only get him to scrub his face. He is getting acne but doesn't care if he has big old whiteheads...and this drives me nuts. He doesn't care. Which .....I guess could be a blessing as he doesn't pick at his face like I did as a kid...but you would think his friends would say something...what's a mom to do???/

"In the Midst of Difficulty lies Opportunity" Albert Einstein

Success is not measured by one's position but by the obstacles one has overcome to obtain that position

From: <kevin8@...> Sent: Mon, July 26, 2010 11:48:03 AMSubject: Re: ( ) defiance & meltdowns with shower every night

that is normal for aspie kids they see it has change until they get use to the change this will happen but you can explain to the child what is happening and they will uselly accept what is happening.

From: baileybear64 <baileybear64. au>Subject: ( ) defiance & meltdowns with shower every night Date: Sunday, 25 July, 2010, 7:23

does anyone else have this problem? Every night our son is oppostional defiant, argumentative, and even has meltdowns about getting in the shower (or bath). Once in, he doesn't want to get out (and does the whole oppostional, defiant, meltdown thing again). So frustratingMiranda------------ --------- --------- ------

July 26, 2010

My son is the same way, Jan. He loves taking long showers. He'll lay down in the bathtub with the shower on and just chill out. It's a great way for him to relax. Wish he'd wash his hair every time he was in there, but hey, maybe that will improve as he gets older =)

"Over-optimism is waiting for you ship to come in when you haven't sent one out."

From: rushen janice <jrushen@...> Sent: Mon, July 26, 2010 10:07:42 PMSubject: Re: ( ) defiance & meltdowns with shower every night

Nope...my son is the total opposite...he is 14 ...loved baths...and now loves showers and when he gets in....we can't get him out...one time he was in there and fell asleep. He is the cleanest 14 year old around...now if I could only get him to scrub his face. He is getting acne but doesn't care if he has big old whiteheads.. .and this drives me nuts. He doesn't care. Which .....I guess could be a blessing as he doesn't pick at his face like I did as a kid...but you would think his friends would say something... what's a mom to do???/

"In the Midst of Difficulty lies Opportunity" Albert Einstein

Success is not measured by one's position but by the obstacles one has overcome to obtain that position

From: <kevin8btinternet (DOT) com> Sent: Mon, July 26, 2010 11:48:03 AMSubject: Re: ( ) defiance & meltdowns with shower every night

that is normal for aspie kids they see it has change until they get use to the change this will happen but you can explain to the child what is happening and they will uselly accept what is happening.

From: baileybear64 <baileybear64. au>Subject: ( ) defiance & meltdowns with shower every night Date: Sunday, 25 July, 2010, 7:23

does anyone else have this problem? Every night our son is oppostional defiant, argumentative, and even has meltdowns about getting in the shower (or bath). Once in, he doesn't want to get out (and does the whole oppostional, defiant, meltdown thing again). So frustratingMiranda------------ --------- --------- ------

July 26, 2010

Yup...that's what my son does too! He washes his hair...but not sure about the face...and I just realized ...it must have to do his his sensory issues...duh...he hates the feeling of stridex...and such!

Our kids can be so different but so much alike!

jan

"In the Midst of Difficulty lies Opportunity" Albert Einstein

Success is not measured by one's position but by the obstacles one has overcome to obtain that position

From: MacAllister <smacalli@...> Sent: Mon, July 26, 2010 11:28:03 PMSubject: Re: ( ) defiance & meltdowns with shower every night

My son is the same way, Jan. He loves taking long showers. He'll lay down in the bathtub with the shower on and just chill out. It's a great way for him to relax. Wish he'd wash his hair every time he was in there, but hey, maybe that will improve as he gets older =)

"Over-optimism is waiting for you ship to come in when you haven't sent one out."

From: rushen janice <jrushen (DOT) com> Sent: Mon, July 26, 2010 10:07:42 PMSubject: Re: ( ) defiance & meltdowns with shower every night

Nope...my son is the total opposite...he is 14 ...loved baths...and now loves showers and when he gets in....we can't get him out...one time he was in there and fell asleep. He is the cleanest 14 year old around...now if I could only get him to scrub his face. He is getting acne but doesn't care if he has big old whiteheads.. .and this drives me nuts. He doesn't care. Which .....I guess could be a blessing as he doesn't pick at his face like I did as a kid...but you would think his friends would say something... what's a mom to do???/

"In the Midst of Difficulty lies Opportunity" Albert Einstein

Success is not measured by one's position but by the obstacles one has overcome to obtain that position

From: <kevin8btinternet (DOT) com> Sent: Mon, July 26, 2010 11:48:03 AMSubject: Re: ( ) defiance & meltdowns with shower every night

that is normal for aspie kids they see it has change until they get use to the change this will happen but you can explain to the child what is happening and they will uselly accept what is happening.

From: baileybear64 <baileybear64. au>Subject: ( ) defiance & meltdowns with shower every night Date: Sunday, 25 July, 2010, 7:23

does anyone else have this problem? Every night our son is oppostional defiant, argumentative, and even has meltdowns about getting in the shower (or bath). Once in, he doesn't want to get out (and does the whole oppostional, defiant, meltdown thing again). So frustratingMiranda------------ --------- --------- ------

July 26, 2010

Yep, we have that here, too. What has been helpful is having it in writing. I bought a pad of blank monthly calendars and I write down stuff like dance classes, swimming lessons, times I'll need to be out in the evening (very stressful to her), etc. Once I added in "bathe" (that gives her the choice of shower or bath) on specific days, the arguing decreased. It didn't disappear completely, but it was definitely less.

As for getting her out, well, I bought a big, but cheap, clock at Wal-mart and hung it in the shower on one of those Command hooks that come off without leaving a mark. The idea was to help her see how long she'd been in there so she'd remember to get out. It was probably in there 3-4 weeks before she realized it was even there and even then she didn't make the connection. LOL. Oh, well. Her dad and I are finding it helpful for us.

Cheryl S.

July 26, 2010

It's not a sensory thing w/ Dylan. He doesn't wash his body/face/hair like he should because, in his own words, he's "LAZY". He'd rather just lay there like a log and relax instead of clean anything. He's fallen asleep a few times, himself. When I threaten to wash his hair for him, that usually cures the laziness and he'll do it =)

"Over-optimism is waiting for you ship to come in when you haven't sent one out."

From: rushen janice <jrushen@...> Sent: Mon, July 26, 2010 11:06:10 PMSubject: Re: ( ) defiance & meltdowns with shower every night

Yup...that's what my son does too! He washes his hair...but not sure about the face...and I just realized ...it must have to do his his sensory issues...duh. ..he hates the feeling of stridex...and such!

Our kids can be so different but so much alike!

jan

"In the Midst of Difficulty lies Opportunity" Albert Einstein

Success is not measured by one's position but by the obstacles one has overcome to obtain that position

From: MacAllister <smacalli (DOT) com> Sent: Mon, July 26, 2010 11:28:03 PMSubject: Re: ( ) defiance & meltdowns with shower every night