Re: how to build frustration tolerance for young child (4-5yo)?

August 25, 2010

Something that worked for my daughter was redirection. It might not work, but it did for her.

Mom to my 4 girls

Madeline, Cayla, Arabella, & Vincenza

"You are the TRIP I did not take

You are the PEARLS I cannot buy

You are the blue Italian LAKE

YOU are my piece of foreign SKY"

---Anne ----

( ) how to build frustration tolerance for young child (4-5yo)?

Anyone have ideas on helping your young child (4-5yo) build frustration tolerance, for when things don't go his way, when he's asked to do something he does not prefer, etc?

Thanks,

August 25, 2010

What I've done is try to prepare my daughter (now 8) for any possibilities - I've become her "forward thinker"...thinking in advance for her for any alternative things that could happen...It lessens their frustrations by just preparing them for the "what ifs". I have the school doing this also - when there will be a sub, when there will be special things like an assembly, etc.

( ) how to build frustration tolerance for young child (4-5yo)?

Anyone have ideas on helping your young child (4-5yo) build frustration tolerance, for when things don't go his way, when he's asked to do something he does not prefer, etc?Thanks,

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August 25, 2010

I think our kids need to work on this their whole lives so don't get your hopes up for perfection here. My daughter has to take 3 deep breaths and if it is something she really really wants and can not have I tell her she can pretend in her mind it is that way. Like if she wants in the book we read the shark to eat the person and not rescue them we cannot rewrite and re draw the pictures so we tell her she can pretend and creatively retell her version AFTER I read it correctly once first. I guess it would depend on what your having trouble with. Other things are just accepting the word no for my daughter. I tell her she can either have this choice or that choice or I get to pick for her. Also If the answer is just no she usually melts down pretty hard then I tell her the answer is still no and she can either breath and calm

down and do something else or she can go to her room and have a hissy fit and come out when she is ready to be calm.From: melody_autumn06 <melodyh2006@...>Subject: ( ) how to build frustration tolerance for young child (4-5yo)? Date: Wednesday, August 25, 2010, 1:13 PM

Anyone have ideas on helping your young child (4-5yo) build frustration tolerance, for when things don't go his way, when he's asked to do something he does not prefer, etc?

Thanks,

August 26, 2010

HI! Anyone who can give me some tips on how to toilet train my 5yrs old son.Thanks!

From: Lori <lori.hayes6@...>Subject: Re: ( ) how to build frustration tolerance for young child (4-5yo)? Date: Wednesday, August 25, 2010, 11:15 PM

What I've done is try to prepare my daughter (now 8) for any possibilities - I've become her "forward thinker"...thinking in advance for her for any alternative things that could happen...It lessens their frustrations by just preparing them for the "what ifs". I have the school doing this also - when there will be a sub, when there will be special things like an assembly, etc.

( ) how to build frustration tolerance for young child (4-5yo)?

Anyone have ideas on helping your young child (4-5yo) build frustration tolerance, for when things don't go his way, when he's asked to do something he does not prefer, etc?Thanks,

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August 26, 2010

One strategy is to practice rehearsing situations and alternative

reactions (called shaping). In some kids you may have to practice this nightly

for months before some changes occur. Whenever you see any slight improvement

(no matter how slight) give lots of praise. This

is positive reinforcement.

In some AS kids regulations of emotions is one of the hardest

things to do even if the skills have been taught. Depnding

on the extent of outbursts at some point some kids do need

medication. Some kids are helped by low doses of antidepresants

to reduce obessions (ridgidness) and in some cases if

the problem is intense and the child is prone to

aggression a doctor may advise an anti-psychotic (only

after shaping strategies have been extensively employed).

Pam

>

> Anyone have ideas on helping your young child (4-5yo) build frustration

tolerance, for when things don't go his way, when he's asked to do something he

does not prefer, etc?

>

> Thanks,

>

August 26, 2010

hi-

Anger & Frustration was what ultimately led us to a DX. We took my son to see a

psychologist for " emotional regulation " and anger management. We learned A LOT!

He is now in 6th grade and has been seeing this Dr. since he was going into 2nd

grade. Some of this anger stuff is developmental and their wiring but there is

help.

1. He learned about the anger thermometer and recognizing his anger before if

escalated.

2. We worked with identifying the emotion behind the anger (frustration,

jealousy, ect). Being able to articulate what made him mad helped.

3. We made " social stories " for typical anger provoking incidents. I can

elaborate if you want. Let me know.

4. We had suggestions/strategies for when he got angry--1. remove yourself 2.

count to ten 3. let it out into a pillow...

5. We didn't try to reason with him in the moment. We removed him and when he

cooled down, we revisited.

He's older now, but the skills we started working on then have become habits

(with frequent usage and practice) and he can regulate his emotions pretty

well.I can talk for hours about this..so if you have any other questions..feel

free to ask.

He has been off GLUTEN for 2.5 mos and I find that also helped his demeanor as

well! We are doing some biomedical stuff.

Best of luck!

>

> Anyone have ideas on helping your young child (4-5yo) build frustration

tolerance, for when things don't go his way, when he's asked to do something he

does not prefer, etc?

>

> Thanks,

>

August 27, 2010

Yes--FRONT END prep!!! I forgot that one. We do lots of that. Great one! " Here's

what you can expect, but it might not be exactly like that....any questions,

concerns, ect? " . Good strategy!

>

> What I've done is try to prepare my daughter (now 8) for any possibilities -

I've become her " forward thinker " ...thinking in advance for her for any

alternative things that could happen...It lessens their frustrations by just

preparing them for the " what ifs " . I have the school doing this also - when

there will be a sub, when there will be special things like an assembly, etc.

>

> ( ) how to build frustration tolerance for young

child (4-5yo)?

>

> Anyone have ideas on helping your young child (4-5yo) build frustration

tolerance, for when things don't go his way, when he's asked to do something he

does not prefer, etc?

>

> Thanks,

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

>

> No virus found in this incoming message.

> Checked by AVG - www.avg.com

> Version: 9.0.851 / Virus Database: 271.1.1/3094 - Release Date: 08/25/10

14:34:00

>

August 27, 2010

I have to add what some others said REDIRECTION and PREPARING THEM IN

ADVANCE..THOSE WORK WELL TOO!!!

> >

> > Anyone have ideas on helping your young child (4-5yo) build frustration

tolerance, for when things don't go his way, when he's asked to do something he

does not prefer, etc?

> >

> > Thanks,

> >

>

August 27, 2010

I still do this for my son who's 14! I'm not even sure it's necessary at this point because sometimes he gives me the ol' "do you think I didn't already know that?" look - only how a teenager can give it - but I just remind him that I'm trying to prevent any surprises. You can even take it a step further and mentally rehearse with your child what he or she can do if "A" happens. For example, we'd go out to eat in a restaurant that is sometimes loud. Beforehand, I would prepare my son that it might be loud and if so, come up with a plan. I'd make sure he was sitting next to me so I could rub his back or neck to help him relax. One he was done eating, another adult could leave the table with him and wait outside or in a quieter place in the restaurant until the rest of the family was done. My son has learned better coping strategies now so it's usually not necessary, but options like this helped a ton when he was younger.Sent via BlackBerry by AT&TFrom: "srba1170" <sasmrr@...>Sender: Date: Fri, 27 Aug 2010 13:27:21 -0000< >Reply Subject: Re: ( ) how to build frustration tolerance for young child (4-5yo)? Yes--FRONT END prep!!! I forgot that one. We do lots of that. Great one! " Here's what you can expect, but it might not be exactly like that....any questions, concerns, ect? " . Good strategy!>> What I've done is try to prepare my daughter (now 8) for any possibilities - I've become her " forward thinker " ...thinking in advance for her for any alternative things that could happen...It lessens their frustrations by just preparing them for the " what ifs " . I have the school doing this also - when there will be a sub, when there will be special things like an assembly, etc. > > > ( ) how to build frustration tolerance for young child (4-5yo)?> > > > Anyone have ideas on helping your young child (4-5yo) build frustration tolerance, for when things don't go his way, when he's asked to do something he does not prefer, etc?> > Thanks,> > > > > > > > ----------------------------------------------------------> > > > No virus found in this incoming message.> Checked by AVG - www.avg.com > Version: 9.0.851 / Virus Database: 271.1.1/3094 - Release Date: 08/25/10 14:34:00>

August 28, 2010

Thank you all for your incredibly helpful suggestions and advice. It is

sincerely appreciated.

> > >

> > > Anyone have ideas on helping your young child (4-5yo) build frustration

tolerance, for when things don't go his way, when he's asked to do something he

does not prefer, etc?

> > >

> > > Thanks,

> > >

> >

>

August 29, 2010

I used to give my son five minute warnings: "In about 5 minutes we're going to leave the playground." When he was really young this was followed by "one more minute and it will be time to go."

He's seventeen and I still do it for certain things. Especially when its around bedtime.

From: melody_autumn06

Sent: Saturday, August 28, 2010 12:17 PM

autism

Subject: how to build frustration tolerance for young child (4-5yo)?

Anyone have ideas on helping a young child (4-5yo) build frustration tolerance, for when things don't go his way, when he's asked to do something he does not prefer, etc?Thanks,

September 14, 2010

I still do this sometimes with my 21 yo ds (hfa) because he gets so anxiety ridden. So I have often said, "If you get there and this isn't what is going on, you can do...this,that or the other..." He does give me that, "I'm not stupid" look but I think he also appreciates the ideas. I don't do it all the time, of course. But it's hard to resist after raising such a child. lol. I love cell phones too! It helps because he knows he can call me or his dad if he needs to.

Roxanna

"I

predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Jefferson