Is all this NORMAL?

March 10, 2011

I can say I absolutely empathize with you and confirm that you are not alone. They have been putting per mom on IEPs and 504s for my son for years. It is annoying and somewhat damaging to me personally since I am in the middle of a highly contentious divorce and custody battle with my ex who does not want my son labeled or treated, but I take it for what it is, their incompetence and not understanding how my son's disability manifests itself fully. this is their way of trying to tell you you ar a bad mom and have no clue about your own child. Eventually something will happen in front of them and then they will realize how wrong they have been. for your sake, I hope that it is a smaller incident than my son's was, but the truly sad thing is that should have to happen for us to get the help

our children really need. The best advice I can give is to document everythind then put that in a fomral piece you state you would like put in the parent concern section of the IEP. That is the only way your concerns will ever be documented accurately. Just know you are not alone and killing them with kindness while documenting and backing it up every time will eventually get you where you need to be. I eventually wen tot he superintendent with so much documentationa nd disability rights help that he literally looked over at the Special Ed director for the unified School district and said "Why doesn't his kid qualify for special ed or have an IEP?" I wish I had that one on tape. That was definitely what teh MAstercard commercials would have called priceless. Your day will come too, just do your due dilligence.

From: SoCalVal <socalval@...> Sent: Wed, March 9, 2011 11:52:42 PMSubject: Re: ( ) Is all this "NORMAL"?

ï»¿ Thinking of you. This is so difficult. I know, we just went through similar issues. You're doing a good job - the best you can do. The difficult times will pass soon. Hugs to you and your son. : )

( ) Is all this "NORMAL"?> > Date: Saturday, March 5, 2011, 11:34 PM> > > > > My son is almost 8 and was recently diagnosed as having Aspergers, Anxiety and ADHD (that one came a year ago). He is on Vyvanse, Zyrexia and Clondine and attends Catholic school where he is failing, lying, and is in the process of IEP evals and so far will be receiving PT (only eval finished). My main problem with him is the tantrums. The full tilt meltdowns and this sound he makes that is tearing my nerves to shreds. His psychiatrist is willing

to hospitalize him to make him realize this behavior is unacceptable but that scares me. She calls me a helicopter mother and I am, I have to be. He's got no clue on how to act. I showed her an example of him at my daughter's Kindergarten open house. He refused to stay out of the activities for the smaller children but then he just stood there. He then conned her into he was afraid to participate because one child in his class laughs at him and bosses him. I've seen that kid with Will. He tries to guide to appropriate behaviors and Will resents him and thinks he's bossy. I digress. Then the psych tells me to lighten up, that I'm a naggy depressed mother. Well DUH I am. My child screams, cries, throws himself on the freaking floor and carries on over NOTHING.My younger children are being to emulate this behavior and I am losing control of my home because of it. I am sick of tip toeing around my own children.I'm tired of her and this ridiculous

contracts that she draws up with him when I've punished him for a behavior (ie not doing school work and took away the DS, he refused to stop talking about the DS so it is going back to land when my mother comes to visit). I think I should change doctors but I'm afraid. In all the years since he's turned 2 1/2 she is the only one I've found that listened that something wasn't right. My husband is giving in to the behaviors to try and get some peace in the house (which leaves being the hardass to me more and more) and we are so far from family (though I doubt good intentioned as they would be they'd be a lot of help) and the only friend I have here has her own life going on and no time to help here. My mother is coming to visit and all I hear from her, all I've ever heard from her is that he isn't on a strict enough schedule (umm yeah he is and always has been), that I'm not consistent enough, that I don't punish him enough. Even though she insists

she doesn't believe she's ever said those things she will after a few minutes say just that!!!!!> > I yell because with all the noise he makes he can't hear me, I'm terrified someone is going to call social services because all he does is scream and if you move him or stop him from doing something (like trying to leave or continue to do something you've told him to stop) he screams and shrieks and yells your hurting him or he can't breathe. The other day he scratched himself with his fingernails because he refuses to let me cut them and because later his baby brother picked up a butter knife Will started saying that the baby attacked him with the knife.I've told him that if he needs to make all that noise he needs to go into a back bedroom away from the baby until he calms down. That in that room he can scream, cry, shriek and do all those things all he wants. I don't know what to do. Someone got an idea? Am I just a horrible mother and

he's getting worse because I'm not fit to be around him? Sometimes I feel like I should just pack my crap now and let his father finish raising him:( I hate feeling like this>

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March 10, 2011

,

Does your daughter take any medications? Could she be having any side affects if she is? How are they helping you deal with her cutting? ne

From: Lawton <lawtonjennifer@...>Subject: ( ) Is all this "NORMAL"? Date: Saturday, March 5, 2011, 11:34 PM

My son is almost 8 and was recently diagnosed as having Aspergers, Anxiety and ADHD (that one came a year ago). He is on Vyvanse, Zyrexia and Clondine and attends Catholic school where he is failing, lying, and is in the process of IEP evals and so far will be receiving PT (only eval finished). My main problem with him is the tantrums. The full tilt meltdowns and this sound he makes that is tearing my nerves to shreds. His psychiatrist is willing to hospitalize him to make him realize this behavior is unacceptable but that scares me. She calls me a helicopter mother and I am, I have to be. He's got no clue on how to act. I showed her an example of him at my daughter's Kindergarten open house. He refused to stay out of the activities for the smaller children but then he just stood there. He then conned her into he was afraid to participate because one child in his class laughs at him and bosses him. I've seen that kid with Will. He tries to guide

to appropriate behaviors and Will resents him and thinks he's bossy. I digress. Then the psych tells me to lighten up, that I'm a naggy depressed mother. Well DUH I am. My child screams, cries, throws himself on the freaking floor and carries on over NOTHING.My younger children are being to emulate this behavior and I am losing control of my home because of it. I am sick of tip toeing around my own children.I'm tired of her and this ridiculous contracts that she draws up with him when I've punished him for a behavior (ie not doing school work and took away the DS, he refused to stop talking about the DS so it is going back to land when my mother comes to visit). I think I should change doctors but I'm afraid. In all the years since he's turned 2 1/2 she is the only one I've found that listened that something wasn't right. My husband is giving in to the behaviors to try and get some peace in the house (which leaves being the hardass to me

more and more) and we are so far from family (though I doubt good intentioned as they would be they'd be a lot of help) and the only friend I have here has her own life going on and no time to help here. My mother is coming to visit and all I hear from her, all I've ever heard from her is that he isn't on a strict enough schedule (umm yeah he is and always has been), that I'm not consistent enough, that I don't punish him enough. Even though she insists she doesn't believe she's ever said those things she will after a few minutes say just that!!!!!I yell because with all the noise he makes he can't hear me, I'm terrified someone is going to call social services because all he does is scream and if you move him or stop him from doing something (like trying to leave or continue to do something you've told him to stop) he screams and shrieks and yells your hurting him or he can't breathe. The other day he scratched himself with his fingernails

because he refuses to let me cut them and because later his baby brother picked up a butter knife Will started saying that the baby attacked him with the knife.I've told him that if he needs to make all that noise he needs to go into a back bedroom away from the baby until he calms down. That in that room he can scream, cry, shriek and do all those things all he wants. I don't know what to do. Someone got an idea? Am I just a horrible mother and he's getting worse because I'm not fit to be around him? Sometimes I feel like I should just pack my crap now and let his father finish raising him:( I hate feeling like this

March 10, 2011

Thank you ! :-)ne

We experienced some of this too. When I told the pediatrician that my son was lining things up all the time at his 18 month check up, the answer was he just likes things to be orderly. At the 2 1/2 year check up when I said my son's hearing seems to be exceptionally sensitive, the answer was that kids have better hearing than adults because their hearing has not yet been damaged. After the school district did an evaluation, the report was full of comments like "according to the mother's report" - because clearly if the mother thinks it, it can't be right! Our developmental therapist forwarded me an email conversation she had with the school district psychologist, in which the psychologist essentially asked her if she had ever seen any of my son's concerning behaviors first hand or if it was "only" based on the mother's report. Luckily, the developmental therapist was able to confirm that she had been out on play dates with my son and seen his

struggles with peers for herself, but still the implication that the mom is making it all up is very frustrating! We were so glad when we finally found a psychologist who took us seriously, and ultimately made the AS dx.Bridget> > > From: Lawton <lawtonjennifer@...>> Subject: ( ) Is all this "NORMAL"?> > Date: Saturday, March 5, 2011, 11:34 PM> > > > > My son is almost 8 and was recently diagnosed as having Aspergers, Anxiety and ADHD (that one came a year ago). He is on Vyvanse, Zyrexia and Clondine and attends Catholic school where he is failing, lying, and is in the process of IEP evals and so far will be receiving PT (only eval finished). My main problem with him is the tantrums. The full tilt meltdowns and this sound he makes that is tearing my nerves to shreds. His psychiatrist is willing

to hospitalize him to make him realize this behavior is unacceptable but that scares me. She calls me a helicopter mother and I am, I have to be. He's got no clue on how to act. I showed her an example of him at my daughter's Kindergarten open house. He refused to stay out of the activities for the smaller children but then he just stood there. He then conned her into he was afraid to participate because one child in his class laughs at him and bosses him. I've seen that kid with Will. He tries to guide to appropriate behaviors and Will resents him and thinks he's bossy. I digress. Then the psych tells me to lighten up, that I'm a naggy depressed mother. Well DUH I am. My child screams, cries, throws himself on the freaking floor and carries on over NOTHING.My younger children are being to emulate this behavior and I am losing control of my home because of it. I am sick of tip toeing around my own children.I'm tired of her and this ridiculous

contracts that she draws up with him when I've punished him for a behavior (ie not doing school work and took away the DS, he refused to stop talking about the DS so it is going back to land when my mother comes to visit). I think I should change doctors but I'm afraid. In all the years since he's turned 2 1/2 she is the only one I've found that listened that something wasn't right. My husband is giving in to the behaviors to try and get some peace in the house (which leaves being the hardass to me more and more) and we are so far from family (though I doubt good intentioned as they would be they'd be a lot of help) and the only friend I have here has her own life going on and no time to help here. My mother is coming to visit and all I hear from her, all I've ever heard from her is that he isn't on a strict enough schedule (umm yeah he is and always has been), that I'm not consistent enough, that I don't punish him enough. Even though she insists

she doesn't believe she's ever said those things she will after a few minutes say just that!!!!!> > I yell because with all the noise he makes he can't hear me, I'm terrified someone is going to call social services because all he does is scream and if you move him or stop him from doing something (like trying to leave or continue to do something you've told him to stop) he screams and shrieks and yells your hurting him or he can't breathe. The other day he scratched himself with his fingernails because he refuses to let me cut them and because later his baby brother picked up a butter knife Will started saying that the baby attacked him with the knife.I've told him that if he needs to make all that noise he needs to go into a back bedroom away from the baby until he calms down. That in that room he can scream, cry, shriek and do all those things all he wants. I don't know what to do. Someone got an idea? Am I just a horrible mother and

he's getting worse because I'm not fit to be around him? Sometimes I feel like I should just pack my crap now and let his father finish raising him:( I hate feeling like this>

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March 10, 2011

She is on 80mg of Prozac and 300mg of Wellbutrin. She started cutting before any medication. After medication she stopped cutting for 2 years then the anger got worse and High School was more stressful and she started cutting again, so they upped her Prozac and lowered the Wellbutrin. Now she is much better to talk with and has really calmed down, but she still wants to cut when things do go her way or she is teased at school.

I don't know what to do any more.

From: Lawton <lawtonjennifer@...>Subject: ( ) Is all this "NORMAL"? Date: Saturday, March 5, 2011, 11:34 PM

My son is almost 8 and was recently diagnosed as having Aspergers, Anxiety and ADHD (that one came a year ago). He is on Vyvanse, Zyrexia and Clondine and attends Catholic school where he is failing, lying, and is in the process of IEP evals and so far will be receiving PT (only eval finished). My main problem with him is the tantrums. The full tilt meltdowns and this sound he makes that is tearing my nerves to shreds. His psychiatrist is willing to hospitalize him to make him realize this behavior is unacceptable but that scares me. She calls me a helicopter mother and I am, I have to be. He's got no clue on how to act. I showed her an example of him at my daughter's Kindergarten open house. He refused to stay out of the activities for the smaller children but then he just stood there. He then conned her into he was afraid to participate because one child in his class laughs at him and bosses him. I've seen that kid with Will. He tries to guide

to appropriate behaviors and Will resents him and thinks he's bossy. I digress. Then the psych tells me to lighten up, that I'm a naggy depressed mother. Well DUH I am. My child screams, cries, throws himself on the freaking floor and carries on over NOTHING.My younger children are being to emulate this behavior and I am losing control of my home because of it. I am sick of tip toeing around my own children.I'm tired of her and this ridiculous contracts that she draws up with him when I've punished him for a behavior (ie not doing school work and took away the DS, he refused to stop talking about the DS so it is going back to land when my mother comes to visit). I think I should change doctors but I'm afraid. In all the years since he's turned 2 1/2 she is the only one I've found that listened that something wasn't right. My husband is giving in to the behaviors to try and get some peace in the house (which leaves being the hardass to me

more and more) and we are so far from family (though I doubt good intentioned as they would be they'd be a lot of help) and the only friend I have here has her own life going on and no time to help here. My mother is coming to visit and all I hear from her, all I've ever heard from her is that he isn't on a strict enough schedule (umm yeah he is and always has been), that I'm not consistent enough, that I don't punish him enough. Even though she insists she doesn't believe she's ever said those things she will after a few minutes say just that!!!!!I yell because with all the noise he makes he can't hear me, I'm terrified someone is going to call social services because all he does is scream and if you move him or stop him from doing something (like trying to leave or continue to do something you've told him to stop) he screams and shrieks and yells your hurting him or he can't breathe. The other day he scratched himself with his fingernails

because he refuses to let me cut them and because later his baby brother picked up a butter knife Will started saying that the baby attacked him with the knife.I've told him that if he needs to make all that noise he needs to go into a back bedroom away from the baby until he calms down. That in that room he can scream, cry, shriek and do all those things all he wants. I don't know what to do. Someone got an idea? Am I just a horrible mother and he's getting worse because I'm not fit to be around him? Sometimes I feel like I should just pack my crap now and let his father finish raising him:( I hate feeling like this

March 11, 2011

Oh ,

I'm so sorry you and your daughter have been going through this. This, I know, is asking a lot, but can you get her out of school and do her schooling at home? Whetherr it's a virtual school or homeschooling? That may relieve a lot of the stressors?

Hugs.

Robin

From: Lawton <lawtonjennifer@...>Subject: ( ) Is all this "NORMAL"? Date: Saturday, March 5, 2011, 11:34 PM

My son is almost 8 and was recently diagnosed as having Aspergers, Anxiety and ADHD (that one came a year ago). He is on Vyvanse, Zyrexia and Clondine and attends Catholic school where he is failing, lying, and is in the process of IEP evals and so far will be receiving PT (only eval finished). My main problem with him is the tantrums. The full tilt meltdowns and this sound he makes that is tearing my nerves to shreds. His psychiatrist is willing to hospitalize him to make him realize this behavior is unacceptable but that scares me. She calls me a helicopter mother and I am, I have to be. He's got no clue on how to act. I showed her an example of him at my daughter's Kindergarten open house. He refused to stay out of the activities for the smaller children but then he just stood there. He then conned her into he was afraid to participate because one child in his class laughs at him and bosses him. I've seen that kid with Will. He tries to guide

to appropriate behaviors and Will resents him and thinks he's bossy. I digress. Then the psych tells me to lighten up, that I'm a naggy depressed mother. Well DUH I am. My child screams, cries, throws himself on the freaking floor and carries on over NOTHING.My younger children are being to emulate this behavior and I am losing control of my home because of it. I am sick of tip toeing around my own children.I'm tired of her and this ridiculous contracts that she draws up with him when I've punished him for a behavior (ie not doing school work and took away the DS, he refused to stop talking about the DS so it is going back to land when my mother comes to visit). I think I should change doctors but I'm afraid. In all the years since he's turned 2 1/2 she is the only one I've found that listened that something wasn't right. My husband is giving in to the behaviors to try and get some peace in the house (which leaves being the hardass to me

more and more) and we are so far from family (though I doubt good intentioned as they would be they'd be a lot of help) and the only friend I have here has her own life going on and no time to help here. My mother is coming to visit and all I hear from her, all I've ever heard from her is that he isn't on a strict enough schedule (umm yeah he is and always has been), that I'm not consistent enough, that I don't punish him enough. Even though she insists she doesn't believe she's ever said those things she will after a few minutes say just that!!!!!I yell because with all the noise he makes he can't hear me, I'm terrified someone is going to call social services because all he does is scream and if you move him or stop him from doing something (like trying to leave or continue to do something you've told him to stop) he screams and shrieks and yells your hurting him or he can't breathe. The other day he scratched himself with his fingernails

because he refuses to let me cut them and because later his baby brother picked up a butter knife Will started saying that the baby attacked him with the knife.I've told him that if he needs to make all that noise he needs to go into a back bedroom away from the baby until he calms down. That in that room he can scream, cry, shriek and do all those things all he wants. I don't know what to do. Someone got an idea? Am I just a horrible mother and he's getting worse because I'm not fit to be around him? Sometimes I feel like I should just pack my crap now and let his father finish raising him:( I hate feeling like

this

March 11, 2011

Thank you. I have wanted to do that but everyone I talk to says she needs socialization and not to keep her to just herself and me all day. She has no siblings.

From: Lawton <lawtonjennifer@...>Subject: ( ) Is all this "NORMAL"? Date: Saturday, March 5, 2011, 11:34 PM

My son is almost 8 and was recently diagnosed as having Aspergers, Anxiety and ADHD (that one came a year ago). He is on Vyvanse, Zyrexia and Clondine and attends Catholic school where he is failing, lying, and is in the process of IEP evals and so far will be receiving PT (only eval finished). My main problem with him is the tantrums. The full tilt meltdowns and this sound he makes that is tearing my nerves to shreds. His psychiatrist is willing to hospitalize him to make him realize this behavior is unacceptable but that scares me. She calls me a helicopter mother and I am, I have to be. He's got no clue on how to act. I showed her an example of him at my daughter's Kindergarten open house. He refused to stay out of the activities for the smaller children but then he just stood there. He then conned her into he was afraid to participate because one child in his class laughs at him and bosses him. I've seen that kid with Will. He tries to guide

to appropriate behaviors and Will resents him and thinks he's bossy. I digress. Then the psych tells me to lighten up, that I'm a naggy depressed mother. Well DUH I am. My child screams, cries, throws himself on the freaking floor and carries on over NOTHING.My younger children are being to emulate this behavior and I am losing control of my home because of it. I am sick of tip toeing around my own children.I'm tired of her and this ridiculous contracts that she draws up with him when I've punished him for a behavior (ie not doing school work and took away the DS, he refused to stop talking about the DS so it is going back to land when my mother comes to visit). I think I should change doctors but I'm afraid. In all the years since he's turned 2 1/2 she is the only one I've found that listened that something wasn't right. My husband is giving in to the behaviors to try and get some peace in the house (which leaves being the hardass to me

more and more) and we are so far from family (though I doubt good intentioned as they would be they'd be a lot of help) and the only friend I have here has her own life going on and no time to help here. My mother is coming to visit and all I hear from her, all I've ever heard from her is that he isn't on a strict enough schedule (umm yeah he is and always has been), that I'm not consistent enough, that I don't punish him enough. Even though she insists she doesn't believe she's ever said those things she will after a few minutes say just that!!!!!I yell because with all the noise he makes he can't hear me, I'm terrified someone is going to call social services because all he does is scream and if you move him or stop him from doing something (like trying to leave or continue to do something you've told him to stop) he screams and shrieks and yells your hurting him or he can't breathe. The other day he scratched himself with his fingernails

because he refuses to let me cut them and because later his baby brother picked up a butter knife Will started saying that the baby attacked him with the knife.I've told him that if he needs to make all that noise he needs to go into a back bedroom away from the baby until he calms down. That in that room he can scream, cry, shriek and do all those things all he wants. I don't know what to do. Someone got an idea? Am I just a horrible mother and he's getting worse because I'm not fit to be around him? Sometimes I feel like I should just pack my crap now and let his father finish raising him:( I hate feeling like

this

March 11, 2011

,

When your socialization is negative, then it isn't worth it.

People that say that either have NO CLUE as to what we deal with, are teachers, are SPED teachers or some other nut job. He he.

Sorry. We yanked my now 14 year old out for 6th and 7th grade. It was sooo fricken wonderful for him and our family. He chose to go back for 8th and is now in 9th.

Still has no friends....but has a table he eats at for lunch with other kids. Says he doesn't talk to them and doesn't know their names but that "they're okay". Sigh.

Academically, he does okay but I often think back to how he was for those 2 years and makes me sometimes wish I had the balls to yank him and my others ones that struggle and have them do a virtual school, too. Oh well......

I'll tell ya something, though. This, obviously, is my account, but,,,,,,it was the hardest decision to make. To pull him out. Wow....it was scary. It's their life. It's their future. But......when you do it. There is such a calm feeling. My son immediately became calmer. Brings tears to my eyes now. Good luck to you. Hugs.

Robin

From: Lawton <lawtonjennifer@...>Subject: ( ) Is all this "NORMAL"? Date: Saturday, March 5, 2011, 11:34 PM

My son is almost 8 and was recently diagnosed as having Aspergers, Anxiety and ADHD (that one came a year ago). He is on Vyvanse, Zyrexia and Clondine and attends Catholic school where he is failing, lying, and is in the process of IEP evals and so far will be receiving PT (only eval finished). My main problem with him is the tantrums. The full tilt meltdowns and this sound he makes that is tearing my nerves to shreds. His psychiatrist is willing to hospitalize him to make him realize this behavior is unacceptable but that scares me. She calls me a helicopter mother and I am, I have to be. He's got no clue on how to act. I showed her an example of him at my daughter's Kindergarten open house. He refused to stay out of the activities for the smaller children but then he just stood there. He then conned her into he was afraid to participate because one child in his class laughs at him and bosses him. I've seen that kid with Will. He tries to guide

to appropriate behaviors and Will resents him and thinks he's bossy. I digress. Then the psych tells me to lighten up, that I'm a naggy depressed mother. Well DUH I am. My child screams, cries, throws himself on the freaking floor and carries on over NOTHING.My younger children are being to emulate this behavior and I am losing control of my home because of it. I am sick of tip toeing around my own children.I'm tired of her and this ridiculous contracts that she draws up with him when I've punished him for a behavior (ie not doing school work and took away the DS, he refused to stop talking about the DS so it is going back to land when my mother comes to visit). I think I should change doctors but I'm afraid. In all the years since he's turned 2 1/2 she is the only one I've found that listened that something wasn't right. My husband is giving in to the behaviors to try and get some peace in the house (which leaves being the hardass to me

more and more) and we are so far from family (though I doubt good intentioned as they would be they'd be a lot of help) and the only friend I have here has her own life going on and no time to help here. My mother is coming to visit and all I hear from her, all I've ever heard from her is that he isn't on a strict enough schedule (umm yeah he is and always has been), that I'm not consistent enough, that I don't punish him enough. Even though she insists she doesn't believe she's ever said those things she will after a few minutes say just that!!!!!I yell because with all the noise he makes he can't hear me, I'm terrified someone is going to call social services because all he does is scream and if you move him or stop him from doing something (like trying to leave or continue to do something you've told him to stop) he screams and shrieks and yells your hurting him or he can't breathe. The other day he scratched himself with his fingernails

because he refuses to let me cut them and because later his baby brother picked up a butter knife Will started saying that the baby attacked him with the knife.I've told him that if he needs to make all that noise he needs to go into a back bedroom away from the baby until he calms down. That in that room he can scream, cry, shriek and do all those things all he wants. I don't know what to do. Someone got an idea? Am I just a horrible mother and he's getting worse because I'm not fit to be around him? Sometimes I feel like I should just pack my crap now and let his father finish raising him:( I hate feeling like

this

March 11, 2011

Is she in any kind of therapy? Like Robin suggested, have you considered homeschooling her? If the social interactions she gets in school are mostly negative then maybe it's not the best place for her. How is the school dealing with her getting teased?

My daughter, now 21, only cut herself once. She was 16 at the time. She is not AS but has ADHD. I really overreacted and threatened to put her away. I know this sounds really bad. But her Dad was deployed, and my youngest son with AS was 9 and we were having a lot of issues with the school. I must have made an impression on her though because she never did it again. I made sure too because I would check her. I did get her counceling and she was fine.

I am so sorry you and your daughter are going through this. I hope she finds better ways to cope and can be happy. ne

From: Lawton <lawtonjennifer@...>Subject: ( ) Is all this "NORMAL"? Date: Saturday, March 5, 2011, 11:34 PM

My son is almost 8 and was recently diagnosed as having Aspergers, Anxiety and ADHD (that one came a year ago). He is on Vyvanse, Zyrexia and Clondine and attends Catholic school where he is failing, lying, and is in the process of IEP evals and so far will be receiving PT (only eval finished). My main problem with him is the tantrums. The full tilt meltdowns and this sound he makes that is tearing my nerves to shreds. His psychiatrist is willing to hospitalize him to make him realize this behavior is unacceptable but that scares me. She calls me a helicopter mother and I am, I have to be. He's got no clue on how to act. I showed her an example of him at my daughter's Kindergarten open house. He refused to stay out of the activities for the smaller children but then he just stood there. He then conned her into he was afraid to participate because one child in his class laughs at him and bosses him. I've seen that kid with Will. He tries to guide

to appropriate behaviors and Will resents him and thinks he's bossy. I digress. Then the psych tells me to lighten up, that I'm a naggy depressed mother. Well DUH I am. My child screams, cries, throws himself on the freaking floor and carries on over NOTHING.My younger children are being to emulate this behavior and I am losing control of my home because of it. I am sick of tip toeing around my own children.I'm tired of her and this ridiculous contracts that she draws up with him when I've punished him for a behavior (ie not doing school work and took away the DS, he refused to stop talking about the DS so it is going back to land when my mother comes to visit). I think I should change doctors but I'm afraid. In all the years since he's turned 2 1/2 she is the only one I've found that listened that something wasn't right. My husband is giving in to the behaviors to try and get some peace in the house (which leaves being the hardass to me

more and more) and we are so far from family (though I doubt good intentioned as they would be they'd be a lot of help) and the only friend I have here has her own life going on and no time to help here. My mother is coming to visit and all I hear from her, all I've ever heard from her is that he isn't on a strict enough schedule (umm yeah he is and always has been), that I'm not consistent enough, that I don't punish him enough. Even though she insists she doesn't believe she's ever said those things she will after a few minutes say just that!!!!!I yell because with all the noise he makes he can't hear me, I'm terrified someone is going to call social services because all he does is scream and if you move him or stop him from doing something (like trying to leave or continue to do something you've told him to stop) he screams and shrieks and yells your hurting him or he can't breathe. The other day he scratched himself with his fingernails

because he refuses to let me cut them and because later his baby brother picked up a butter knife Will started saying that the baby attacked him with the knife.I've told him that if he needs to make all that noise he needs to go into a back bedroom away from the baby until he calms down. That in that room he can scream, cry, shriek and do all those things all he wants. I don't know what to do. Someone got an idea? Am I just a horrible mother and he's getting worse because I'm not fit to be around him? Sometimes I feel like I should just pack my crap now and let his father finish raising him:( I hate feeling like

this

March 11, 2011

ï»¿

I agree - the people that say that are the people who have typical average kids and have positive school experiences and also people that don't agree with or understand homeschool. We now live in CA so it's very easy for us to homeschool. It's very accepted here. Many many families choose to homeschool. But still we come across people who are clueless and make negative comments or act like we are aliens from another planet. One pediatrician made a comment once and still to this day I laugh at how stupid it was. She said that he needs the physical excersise that school team sports has to offer. ????? I'm still confused - or rather she is! My son is not even 7 yet - she made this comment last year. I don't know of any elementary school that even has team sports. LOL.

My son was an only child (up till 10 months ago) and many people made came to their conclusion that being an only child was why he acted the way he did - even when I told them of his diagnosis.... sigh..... ignorence..... sigh.......

Seriously though, if you are considering homeschool - please don't let the social concern stop you. I don't know what state you're in but you might find a hybrid program which offers a 1, 2 or 3 day a week classroom option and you homeschool the other days. Our homeschool is a public charter homeschool program. My son receives services thru the school district and they offer a one day a week class. He has 8 kids in his class and they are getting to know eachother and us mom's are setting up meet up days etc. I tell you, our schedule is full of meet ups now and he isn't even asking about his friends from public school (the 26 kids that were annoyed by him and complaining and .... he didn't even know their names anyway because his days were so chaotic and full of noise and confusion! I agree with Robin - there is definately a sense of calm in his little body now. His head seems more clear and he is more focused and enjoys doing all his science experiements again - his passion - something I noticed disappeared a few weeks into starting public school but now it is back!

I never thought I would be a homeschool kind of mom - but so many people chose this option for many different reasons. For us - it's the only environment my son can handle at the moment. We tried pre-school (3 different ones) then Montessori, then an alternative charter school for kindergarten - we kept thinking it was the school or the teachers.... we pulled him 1/2 way thru k to homeschool and it went good! but my son really wanted to try "real" school. So we got the diagnosis and sent him off to try first grade. Nighmare. We just pulled him out to homeschool again 3 weeks ago. We'll reasess his needs each year but for now - my baby is safe and learning in an environment that is nurtruing and understand of his needs.

: )

Let me know if you have any questions if I can help....

what state are you in?

( ) Is all this "NORMAL"? Date: Saturday, March 5, 2011, 11:34 PM

My son is almost 8 and was recently diagnosed as having Aspergers, Anxiety and ADHD (that one came a year ago). He is on Vyvanse, Zyrexia and Clondine and attends Catholic school where he is failing, lying, and is in the process of IEP evals and so far will be receiving PT (only eval finished). My main problem with him is the tantrums. The full tilt meltdowns and this sound he makes that is tearing my nerves to shreds. His psychiatrist is willing to hospitalize him to make him realize this behavior is unacceptable but that scares me. She calls me a helicopter mother and I am, I have to be. He's got no clue on how to act. I showed her an example of him at my daughter's Kindergarten open house. He refused to stay out of the activities for the smaller children but then he just stood there. He then conned her into he was afraid to participate because one child in his class laughs at him and bosses him. I've seen that kid with Will. He tries to guide to appropriate behaviors and Will resents him and thinks he's bossy. I digress. Then the psych tells me to lighten up, that I'm a naggy depressed mother. Well DUH I am. My child screams, cries, throws himself on the freaking floor and carries on over NOTHING.My younger children are being to emulate this behavior and I am losing control of my home because of it. I am sick of tip toeing around my own children.I'm tired of her and this ridiculous contracts that she draws up with him when I've punished him for a behavior (ie not doing school work and took away the DS, he refused to stop talking about the DS so it is going back to land when my mother comes to visit). I think I should change doctors but I'm afraid. In all the years since he's turned 2 1/2 she is the only one I've found that listened that something wasn't right. My husband is giving in to the behaviors to try and get some peace in the house (which leaves being the hardass to me more and more) and we are so far from family (though I doubt good intentioned as they would be they'd be a lot of help) and the only friend I have here has her own life going on and no time to help here. My mother is coming to visit and all I hear from her, all I've ever heard from her is that he isn't on a strict enough schedule (umm yeah he is and always has been), that I'm not consistent enough, that I don't punish him enough. Even though she insists she doesn't believe she's ever said those things she will after a few minutes say just that!!!!!I yell because with all the noise he makes he can't hear me, I'm terrified someone is going to call social services because all he does is scream and if you move him or stop him from doing something (like trying to leave or continue to do something you've told him to stop) he screams and shrieks and yells your hurting him or he can't breathe. The other day he scratched himself with his fingernails because he refuses to let me cut them and because later his baby brother picked up a butter knife Will started saying that the baby attacked him with the knife.I've told him that if he needs to make all that noise he needs to go into a back bedroom away from the baby until he calms down. That in that room he can scream, cry, shriek and do all those things all he wants. I don't know what to do. Someone got an idea? Am I just a horrible mother and he's getting worse because I'm not fit to be around him? Sometimes I feel like I should just pack my crap now and let his father finish raising him:( I hate feeling like this

No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG - www.avg.com Version: 8.5.449 / Virus Database: 271.1.1/3501 - Release Date: 03/11/11 19:56:00

March 18, 2011

Thank you for the reply. Do you know of a website that would help with what, if any, rules are for having a child do some virtual and some vocational school. They tell me here that the schools do just either one or the other. I live in Ohio.

From: Lawton <lawtonjennifer@...>Subject: ( ) Is all this "NORMAL"? Date: Saturday, March 5, 2011, 11:34 PM

My son is almost 8 and was recently diagnosed as having Aspergers, Anxiety and ADHD (that one came a year ago). He is on Vyvanse, Zyrexia and Clondine and attends Catholic school where he is failing, lying, and is in the process of IEP evals and so far will be receiving PT (only eval finished). My main problem with him is the tantrums. The full tilt meltdowns and this sound he makes that is tearing my nerves to shreds. His psychiatrist is willing to hospitalize him to make him realize this behavior is unacceptable but that scares me. She calls me a helicopter mother and I am, I have to be. He's got no clue on how to act. I showed her an example of him at my daughter's Kindergarten open house. He refused to stay out of the activities for the smaller children but then he just stood there. He then conned her into he was afraid to participate because one child in his class laughs at him and bosses him. I've seen that kid with Will. He tries to guide

to appropriate behaviors and Will resents him and thinks he's bossy. I digress. Then the psych tells me to lighten up, that I'm a naggy depressed mother. Well DUH I am. My child screams, cries, throws himself on the freaking floor and carries on over NOTHING.My younger children are being to emulate this behavior and I am losing control of my home because of it. I am sick of tip toeing around my own children.I'm tired of her and this ridiculous contracts that she draws up with him when I've punished him for a behavior (ie not doing school work and took away the DS, he refused to stop talking about the DS so it is going back to land when my mother comes to visit). I think I should change doctors but I'm afraid. In all the years since he's turned 2 1/2 she is the only one I've found that listened that something wasn't right. My husband is giving in to the behaviors to try and get some peace in the house (which leaves being the hardass to me

more and more) and we are so far from family (though I doubt good intentioned as they would be they'd be a lot of help) and the only friend I have here has her own life going on and no time to help here. My mother is coming to visit and all I hear from her, all I've ever heard from her is that he isn't on a strict enough schedule (umm yeah he is and always has been), that I'm not consistent enough, that I don't punish him enough. Even though she insists she doesn't believe she's ever said those things she will after a few minutes say just that!!!!!I yell because with all the noise he makes he can't hear me, I'm terrified someone is going to call social services because all he does is scream and if you move him or stop him from doing something (like trying to leave or continue to do something you've told him to stop) he screams and shrieks and yells your hurting him or he can't breathe. The other day he scratched himself with his fingernails

because he refuses to let me cut them and because later his baby brother picked up a butter knife Will started saying that the baby attacked him with the knife.I've told him that if he needs to make all that noise he needs to go into a back bedroom away from the baby until he calms down. That in that room he can scream, cry, shriek and do all those things all he wants. I don't know what to do. Someone got an idea? Am I just a horrible mother and he's getting worse because I'm not fit to be around him? Sometimes I feel like I should just pack my crap now and let his father finish raising him:( I hate feeling like

this

March 18, 2011

Thank you for your compassion. My daughter is in therapy and has been for about 5 years, but not with the same therapist. Where she is going now, that are testing for a lot of different things, so I am hoping this psychologist is a good one.

When my daughter threatened to cut herself she was going to a psychologist and they wanted to put her away. She freaked and stopped for a while then she was doing it again. I check her now every other night now and she has to stay with us and I wont leave her alone in the house.

Thanks,

From: Lawton <lawtonjennifer@...>Subject: ( ) Is all this "NORMAL"? Date: Saturday, March 5, 2011, 11:34 PM

My son is almost 8 and was recently diagnosed as having Aspergers, Anxiety and ADHD (that one came a year ago). He is on Vyvanse, Zyrexia and Clondine and attends Catholic school where he is failing, lying, and is in the process of IEP evals and so far will be receiving PT (only eval finished). My main problem with him is the tantrums. The full tilt meltdowns and this sound he makes that is tearing my nerves to shreds. His psychiatrist is willing to hospitalize him to make him realize this behavior is unacceptable but that scares me. She calls me a helicopter mother and I am, I have to be. He's got no clue on how to act. I showed her an example of him at my daughter's Kindergarten open house. He refused to stay out of the activities for the smaller children but then he just stood there. He then conned her into he was afraid to participate because one child in his class laughs at him and bosses him. I've seen that kid with Will. He tries to guide

to appropriate behaviors and Will resents him and thinks he's bossy. I digress. Then the psych tells me to lighten up, that I'm a naggy depressed mother. Well DUH I am. My child screams, cries, throws himself on the freaking floor and carries on over NOTHING.My younger children are being to emulate this behavior and I am losing control of my home because of it. I am sick of tip toeing around my own children.I'm tired of her and this ridiculous contracts that she draws up with him when I've punished him for a behavior (ie not doing school work and took away the DS, he refused to stop talking about the DS so it is going back to land when my mother comes to visit). I think I should change doctors but I'm afraid. In all the years since he's turned 2 1/2 she is the only one I've found that listened that something wasn't right. My husband is giving in to the behaviors to try and get some peace in the house (which leaves being the hardass to me

more and more) and we are so far from family (though I doubt good intentioned as they would be they'd be a lot of help) and the only friend I have here has her own life going on and no time to help here. My mother is coming to visit and all I hear from her, all I've ever heard from her is that he isn't on a strict enough schedule (umm yeah he is and always has been), that I'm not consistent enough, that I don't punish him enough. Even though she insists she doesn't believe she's ever said those things she will after a few minutes say just that!!!!!I yell because with all the noise he makes he can't hear me, I'm terrified someone is going to call social services because all he does is scream and if you move him or stop him from doing something (like trying to leave or continue to do something you've told him to stop) he screams and shrieks and yells your hurting him or he can't breathe. The other day he scratched himself with his fingernails

because he refuses to let me cut them and because later his baby brother picked up a butter knife Will started saying that the baby attacked him with the knife.I've told him that if he needs to make all that noise he needs to go into a back bedroom away from the baby until he calms down. That in that room he can scream, cry, shriek and do all those things all he wants. I don't know what to do. Someone got an idea? Am I just a horrible mother and he's getting worse because I'm not fit to be around him? Sometimes I feel like I should just pack my crap now and let his father finish raising him:( I hate feeling like

this

March 18, 2011

Thank you for your help. I am in Ohio. My daughter is in public high school and I would really like her to do art classes in the public school and the academics at home. The school tells me I can not do this.

So I really don't know where to start. I want her to have socialization. She is doing better with that lately. She is on Facebook and talks to people at school, but I don't really like her to be on Facebook. At least she is practicing some conversation, even if it's online. She is learning how to talk to people. I really don't want her to be on the computer at all. She is 16, of course when she is home she doesn't act like it. She just went to a church youth group and she seems to have liked it. I wish I knew about virtual school a long time ago. I think she would have had better self esteem and maybe never started cutting herself.

(sigh)

From: Lawton <lawtonjennifer@...>Subject: ( ) Is all this "NORMAL"? Date: Saturday, March 5, 2011, 11:34 PM

My son is almost 8 and was recently diagnosed as having Aspergers, Anxiety and ADHD (that one came a year ago). He is on Vyvanse, Zyrexia and Clondine and attends Catholic school where he is failing, lying, and is in the process of IEP evals and so far will be receiving PT (only eval finished). My main problem with him is the tantrums. The full tilt meltdowns and this sound he makes that is tearing my nerves to shreds. His psychiatrist is willing to hospitalize him to make him realize this behavior is unacceptable but that scares me. She calls me a helicopter mother and I am, I have to be. He's got no clue on how to act. I showed her an example of him at my daughter's Kindergarten open house. He refused to stay out of the activities for the smaller children but then he just stood there. He then conned her into he was afraid to participate because one child in his class laughs at him and bosses him. I've seen that kid with Will. He tries to guide

to appropriate behaviors and Will resents him and thinks he's bossy. I digress. Then the psych tells me to lighten up, that I'm a naggy depressed mother. Well DUH I am. My child screams, cries, throws himself on the freaking floor and carries on over NOTHING.My younger children are being to emulate this behavior and I am losing control of my home because of it. I am sick of tip toeing around my own children.I'm tired of her and this ridiculous contracts that she draws up with him when I've punished him for a behavior (ie not doing school work and took away the DS, he refused to stop talking about the DS so it is going back to land when my mother comes to visit). I think I should change doctors but I'm afraid. In all the years since he's turned 2 1/2 she is the only one I've found that listened that something wasn't right. My husband is giving in to the behaviors to try and get some peace in the house (which leaves being the hardass to me

more and more) and we are so far from family (though I doubt good intentioned as they would be they'd be a lot of help) and the only friend I have here has her own life going on and no time to help here. My mother is coming to visit and all I hear from her, all I've ever heard from her is that he isn't on a strict enough schedule (umm yeah he is and always has been), that I'm not consistent enough, that I don't punish him enough. Even though she insists she doesn't believe she's ever said those things she will after a few minutes say just that!!!!!I yell because with all the noise he makes he can't hear me, I'm terrified someone is going to call social services because all he does is scream and if you move him or stop him from doing something (like trying to leave or continue to do something you've told him to stop) he screams and shrieks and yells your hurting him or he can't breathe. The other day he scratched himself with his fingernails

because he refuses to let me cut them and because later his baby brother picked up a butter knife Will started saying that the baby attacked him with the knife.I've told him that if he needs to make all that noise he needs to go into a back bedroom away from the baby until he calms down. That in that room he can scream, cry, shriek and do all those things all he wants. I don't know what to do. Someone got an idea? Am I just a horrible mother and he's getting worse because I'm not fit to be around him? Sometimes I feel like I should just pack my crap now and let his father finish raising him:( I hate feeling like

this

No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG - www.avg.com Version: 8.5.449 / Virus Database: 271.1.1/3501 - Release Date: 03/11/11 19:56:00

March 18, 2011

Ya know what, ? I'd "google" your state and then add "virtual school". See what it pulls up. You can attend ANY virtual school. It doesn't have to be in your county or districtt or anything.

Once you locate one, call them and ask if there is such a thing as "half regular and half virtual". I seriously doubt it, just because the district that your child attends gets the money.

I have heard of others on this group that have kids that do maybe a half day at school. I'm not sure it they have a tutor for the other half or do it on their own or what.....but I'd venture to guess that almost anything is possible these days.

Good luck!!!

Robin

From: Lawton <lawtonjennifer@...>Subject: ( ) Is all this "NORMAL"? Date: Saturday, March 5, 2011, 11:34 PM

My son is almost 8 and was recently diagnosed as having Aspergers, Anxiety and ADHD (that one came a year ago). He is on Vyvanse, Zyrexia and Clondine and attends Catholic school where he is failing, lying, and is in the process of IEP evals and so far will be receiving PT (only eval finished). My main problem with him is the tantrums. The full tilt meltdowns and this sound he makes that is tearing my nerves to shreds. His psychiatrist is willing to hospitalize him to make him realize this behavior is unacceptable but that scares me. She calls me a helicopter mother and I am, I have to be. He's got no clue on how to act. I showed her an example of him at my daughter's Kindergarten open house. He refused to stay out of the activities for the smaller children but then he just stood there. He then conned her into he was afraid to participate because one child in his class laughs at him and bosses him. I've seen that kid with Will. He tries to guide

to appropriate behaviors and Will resents him and thinks he's bossy. I digress. Then the psych tells me to lighten up, that I'm a naggy depressed mother. Well DUH I am. My child screams, cries, throws himself on the freaking floor and carries on over NOTHING.My younger children are being to emulate this behavior and I am losing control of my home because of it. I am sick of tip toeing around my own children.I'm tired of her and this ridiculous contracts that she draws up with him when I've punished him for a behavior (ie not doing school work and took away the DS, he refused to stop talking about the DS so it is going back to land when my mother comes to visit). I think I should change doctors but I'm afraid. In all the years since he's turned 2 1/2 she is the only one I've found that listened that something wasn't right. My husband is giving in to the behaviors to try and get some peace in the house (which leaves being the hardass to me

more and more) and we are so far from family (though I doubt good intentioned as they would be they'd be a lot of help) and the only friend I have here has her own life going on and no time to help here. My mother is coming to visit and all I hear from her, all I've ever heard from her is that he isn't on a strict enough schedule (umm yeah he is and always has been), that I'm not consistent enough, that I don't punish him enough. Even though she insists she doesn't believe she's ever said those things she will after a few minutes say just that!!!!!I yell because with all the noise he makes he can't hear me, I'm terrified someone is going to call social services because all he does is scream and if you move him or stop him from doing something (like trying to leave or continue to do something you've told him to stop) he screams and shrieks and yells your hurting him or he can't breathe. The other day he scratched himself with his fingernails

because he refuses to let me cut them and because later his baby brother picked up a butter knife Will started saying that the baby attacked him with the knife.I've told him that if he needs to make all that noise he needs to go into a back bedroom away from the baby until he calms down. That in that room he can scream, cry, shriek and do all those things all he wants. I don't know what to do. Someone got an idea? Am I just a horrible mother and he's getting worse because I'm not fit to be around him? Sometimes I feel like I should just pack my crap now and let his father finish raising him:( I hate feeling like

this

March 18, 2011

Dear ,

We are in Ohio in Mahoning county. There is a group here called Method 8, I saw it on the local news it is in Boardman, Ohio. they help kids with peotrey, art, music, and acting classes. Let me know what I can do hel

Edna Big_momma_2324@...

From: Lawton <lawtonjennifer@...>Subject: ( ) Is all this "NORMAL"? Date: Saturday, March 5, 2011, 11:34 PM

My son is almost 8 and was recently diagnosed as having Aspergers, Anxiety and ADHD (that one came a year ago). He is on Vyvanse, Zyrexia and Clondine and attends Catholic school where he is failing, lying, and is in the process of IEP evals and so far will be receiving PT (only eval finished). My main problem with him is the tantrums. The full tilt meltdowns and this sound he makes that is tearing my nerves to shreds. His psychiatrist is willing to hospitalize him to make him realize this behavior is unacceptable but that scares me. She calls me a helicopter mother and I am, I have to be. He's got no clue on how to act. I showed her an example of him at my daughter's Kindergarten open house. He refused to stay out of the activities for the smaller children but then he just stood there. He then conned her into he was afraid to participate because one child in his class laughs at him and bosses him. I've seen that kid with Will. He tries to guide

to appropriate behaviors and Will resents him and thinks he's bossy. I digress. Then the psych tells me to lighten up, that I'm a naggy depressed mother. Well DUH I am. My child screams, cries, throws himself on the freaking floor and carries on over NOTHING.My younger children are being to emulate this behavior and I am losing control of my home because of it. I am sick of tip toeing around my own children.I'm tired of her and this ridiculous contracts that she draws up with him when I've punished him for a behavior (ie not doing school work and took away the DS, he refused to stop talking about the DS so it is going back to land when my mother comes to visit). I think I should change doctors but I'm afraid. In all the years since he's turned 2 1/2 she is the only one I've found that listened that something wasn't right. My husband is giving in to the behaviors to try and get some peace in the house (which leaves being the hardass to me

more and more) and we are so far from family (though I doubt good intentioned as they would be they'd be a lot of help) and the only friend I have here has her own life going on and no time to help here. My mother is coming to visit and all I hear from her, all I've ever heard from her is that he isn't on a strict enough schedule (umm yeah he is and always has been), that I'm not consistent enough, that I don't punish him enough. Even though she insists she doesn't believe she's ever said those things she will after a few minutes say just that!!!!!I yell because with all the noise he makes he can't hear me, I'm terrified someone is going to call social services because all he does is scream and if you move him or stop him from doing something (like trying to leave or continue to do something you've told him to stop) he screams and shrieks and yells your hurting him or he can't breathe. The other day he scratched himself with his fingernails

because he refuses to let me cut them and because later his baby brother picked up a butter knife Will started saying that the baby attacked him with the knife.I've told him that if he needs to make all that noise he needs to go into a back bedroom away from the baby until he calms down. That in that room he can scream, cry, shriek and do all those things all he wants. I don't know what to do. Someone got an idea? Am I just a horrible mother and he's getting worse because I'm not fit to be around him? Sometimes I feel like I should just pack my crap now and let his father finish raising him:( I hate feeling like

this

No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG - www.avg.com Version: 8.5.449 / Virus Database: 271.1.1/3501 - Release Date: 03/11/11 19:56:00

March 18, 2011

ï»¿

I found this website for you. Homeschool information for Ohio http://www.h-i-o.org/

There should be a lot of good leads for you to look into. Unless you could manage to get what you want approved in an IEP, I don't see you having a chance to let her take art classes at public school. If you are willing to work with academics with her at home then why don't you homeschool but find her art lessons outside of public school. I'm sure it would be much better quality as well.

Being on the computer isn't a bad thing. It can be a very helpful tool in teaching and most Aspies are drawn to technology which could increase her interist to learn (if she's resistant to learning). My son who is only 7 has refused to try to write or spell for a very long time. When ever it was asked of him he resisted and would become upset. This was causing so much stess for him in school because of course if he didn't do it he would miss recess and the teacher would argue with him making his anxiety and self esteem worse. Once we started homeschooling at first I didn't even make a request for him to do it. Then gradually I made a very small request - just write one word and I will write the rest or he would become interested to type it on the computer. Now we have found an interactive online spelling bee where there is an audiance that cheers him on (he loves that part) he earns 1st place or 2 place ribbons and it earns him game time all on this website. There is also a free online typing program that is interactive and fun. Can you imagine, a 7 yr old learning to type properly? We didn't get that class until 9th grade and how boring was it? You should google it Dance Mat typing on BBC website. Even my husband wants to learn now.

Anyway, I know your daughter is older and has made it this far in regular school, Her needs may be different than my son's but school doesn't have to be just one way for all children. Public school isn't for everyone. There are so many different ways to learn and technology is our future. I think if there can be a healthy balance , computers aren't all that bad for learning. But if it's being used to socialize INSTEAD of real socialization it could have negative impact and/or if it's become an obsession to play computer games all day that is a problem but learning with it as a tool - I think it has been a life saver for us. Now I am able to sneak in some traditional worksheets from time to time too!

( ) Is all this "NORMAL"? Date: Saturday, March 5, 2011, 11:34 PM

My son is almost 8 and was recently diagnosed as having Aspergers, Anxiety and ADHD (that one came a year ago). He is on Vyvanse, Zyrexia and Clondine and attends Catholic school where he is failing, lying, and is in the process of IEP evals and so far will be receiving PT (only eval finished). My main problem with him is the tantrums. The full tilt meltdowns and this sound he makes that is tearing my nerves to shreds. His psychiatrist is willing to hospitalize him to make him realize this behavior is unacceptable but that scares me. She calls me a helicopter mother and I am, I have to be. He's got no clue on how to act. I showed her an example of him at my daughter's Kindergarten open house. He refused to stay out of the activities for the smaller children but then he just stood there. He then conned her into he was afraid to participate because one child in his class laughs at him and bosses him. I've seen that kid with Will. He tries to guide to appropriate behaviors and Will resents him and thinks he's bossy. I digress. Then the psych tells me to lighten up, that I'm a naggy depressed mother. Well DUH I am. My child screams, cries, throws himself on the freaking floor and carries on over NOTHING.My younger children are being to emulate this behavior and I am losing control of my home because of it. I am sick of tip toeing around my own children.I'm tired of her and this ridiculous contracts that she draws up with him when I've punished him for a behavior (ie not doing school work and took away the DS, he refused to stop talking about the DS so it is going back to land when my mother comes to visit). I think I should change doctors but I'm afraid. In all the years since he's turned 2 1/2 she is the only one I've found that listened that something wasn't right. My husband is giving in to the behaviors to try and get some peace in the house (which leaves being the hardass to me more and more) and we are so far from family (though I doubt good intentioned as they would be they'd be a lot of help) and the only friend I have here has her own life going on and no time to help here. My mother is coming to visit and all I hear from her, all I've ever heard from her is that he isn't on a strict enough schedule (umm yeah he is and always has been), that I'm not consistent enough, that I don't punish him enough. Even though she insists she doesn't believe she's ever said those things she will after a few minutes say just that!!!!!I yell because with all the noise he makes he can't hear me, I'm terrified someone is going to call social services because all he does is scream and if you move him or stop him from doing something (like trying to leave or continue to do something you've told him to stop) he screams and shrieks and yells your hurting him or he can't breathe. The other day he scratched himself with his fingernails because he refuses to let me cut them and because later his baby brother picked up a butter knife Will started saying that the baby attacked him with the knife.I've told him that if he needs to make all that noise he needs to go into a back bedroom away from the baby until he calms down. That in that room he can scream, cry, shriek and do all those things all he wants. I don't know what to do. Someone got an idea? Am I just a horrible mother and he's getting worse because I'm not fit to be around him? Sometimes I feel like I should just pack my crap now and let his father finish raising him:( I hate feeling like this

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March 19, 2011

You should find an advocate. If she is still in regular public school and has an IEP, you can tailor her education to meet her needs. You may have to really work hard, though, to get a placement option that is not the "norm." You should contact the ohio coalition --> http://www.ocecd.org/

They can help you figure out what to do based on her needs.

Roxanna

May those who love us, love us

And those who don't love us,