Re: Re: Can the school keep a rap sheet on my Asperger son

[Guest guest]

I am a single mom of two and I stay home. I do Mia Bella candles from home and have been doing it for 5 years. No parties required.

Here's my link, www.burningandearning.com

I started this when my son was having issues with the school. You know, all those school meetings and such. LOL!

I don't homeschool as things are much better with school, new state and new school, but I continued the candle business so I could attend the kid's school functions, meetings, etc.

I can send samples if you want. Just let me know.

It's easy to do.

Tracey

In a message dated 1/16/2010 8:33:08 A.M. Central Standard Time (Mex, dawn@... writes:

I really wish I could afford to homeschool him now.

Are there skills and talents that you have that you could turn into a home based business? One of my clients became a Virtual Assistant so she could be at home most of the time. Or changing jobs to where you can work different hours so you could be there with him most of the time?

Zak had a 504 at school and even though they worked on accommodating him they still found ways to track every bit of “bad†behavior.

One time they suspended him for a week because someone (not Zak) had typed “How to Kill Sally†(which turns out to be some kind of video on you tube). When Zak saw someone had typed that into the internet he was fascinated with how many hits would come up. Of course the teacher’s name happened to be Sally and she assumed Zak was looking for ways to kill her! Zak isn’t violent at all and a peace loving boy. Because of his fascination with how many hits you get when you type in different things in the internet he started typing in different teachers names!!! They were going to call the police except that we had a 504 and they know him, they suspended him instead.

He was so upset by all of this, that is traumatized him for a couple of months. This was what made us decide that it was a waste of time trying to get a system to really work with my child so we took him back out of school and said never again would we subject him to the torture of school again.

It took several months for him to not be on edge all the time and feel like he was dong something wrong by being him.

Just my thoughts.

Namaste

Dawn in Tucson

There is a difference between interest and commitment. When you are interested in doing something, you do it only when circumstances permit. When you are committed to something, you accept no excuses, only results. - Unknown

From: [mailto: ] On Behalf Of chefsaramomSent: Friday, January 15, 2010 3:02 PM Subject: ( ) Re: Can the school keep a rap sheet on my Asperger son. minute by minute?

If they knew the first thing about behavior, they would stop doing this immediately. They could actually be ENCOURAGING these behaviors by doing this.

Our kids (all kids, really) do best when we note their POSITIVE behaviors. So, if they want to keep a "rap sheet" that's what they should be focusing on: all the times he does it RIGHT.

They will not be successful with this current method, and are most likely making things much, much worse.

If you haven't already, call for an emergency IEP meeting and request that they have a professional behaviorist come in and observe and make recommendations.

Sara

Sara Gardnerwww.aspergersupport.com

www.behaviortoday.info http://nototherwisespecified.typepad.com/blog/

>> I am so upset right now. My 11-year-old son had a bad school day (well, every school day is bad, even though I don't seem to have much problem at home, unless when I get too upset with his school days and aggravate him). He has close adult supervision all the time. > > Then I found this "rap sheet" in his school bag. I am not sure if that is meant for me to see. But it really does not matter. The "rap sheet" keeps records of everything my son did or said that is inappropriate, minute by minute. It has all the details, with all the bad words, and not so bad words (10:10, said "shits" 3x; 10:10, screamed out "Hey"; 10:11, threw pencil at me). > > I made it clear at IEP meeting that I didn't want them to put all these explicit bad behaviors / words on his daily behavior chart (my son likes reviewing his own behavior charts on the bus home and often find those explicit comments funny). So most of the time, the staff have been emailing me the explicit details of the incidents, and just mark lots of 0's on his behavior charts. But nothing in the email was as detailed as this, to the minute, multiple records for the same minute!!! > > So the helper's job is to keep record all the behaviors, to the exact details, by minute? I thought s/he is supposed to prevent behaviors from happening or to mitigate the problems when they are happening? If he is busy keeping records, when does he actually work on helping my son? My son also said that he knew that the helper was keeping records and, quite a few times, he got in trouble for tearing up the helper's sheets. > > What should I do? It really gives me such an ugly feeling that all the school is doing is to establish evidences how bad my son is. But he is not bad at home at all! Even his 7-year-old sister is following him around, calling "big brother, come here, check out this and check out that". > > I really wish I could afford to homeschool him now.>