Re: Re: Son was hurt at birthday party

[Guest guest]

No child should have to "cope" with Bullies. I have read story after story of children hurting or even killing themselves over bullies! There is no excuse for it, it should not be acceptable, and they should ALWAYS be held accountable no matter what. Bullying hits home with many people and it is just getting worse. Our children get the worse of it and as for me and my family we will not sit and let it happen to our child and neither should anyone else. Its sad that parents feel that it is okay for this to happen. What happened to teaching compassion and love for our neighbors and vice versa. Its just not right! Like I said in my early post on this, I would contact the parents. If they really cared, they would have contacted you to make amends or at least check on your son, by not doing so, shows they don't care and probably never disciplined their child for doing what he did and thus showing him its okay to be a bully. How

horrible. I think parents should also be held accountable for their children's actions. After all, child live what they learn, therefore they had to learn to bully from somewhere or that bullying is okay. Again, just my thoughts.

With a wink, a smile, and many blessings,

TeamJakobSupport children with Aspergers,With your support their is no limit to Jakob's success!!

From: Pamela <susanonderko@...> Sent: Sat, April 10, 2010 9:30:30 AMSubject: ( ) Re: Son was hurt at birthday party

You can attempt to make a connection with the family again and not put them on the defensive. You can simply ask if theyhave any feedback for you on what might have been the trigger.And anything you can do because you want parties to be positivefor everyone. They may be really sorry the event occurred and this would be great. It means they talked to their son and he understands he did wrong.Or they may be very defensive. In which case your son may have to learn to cope with bullies. There are some very good therapists that teach kids how to cope with this.In the future you can stay at parties and the peers behavior will be better. But thereis still recess. If this boys don't like your son it wouldbe better for him to keep a low profile with this group and try to find new friends (easier said then done I realize).I think it is much easier to be friends 1:1 and if it is

atyour house more. Have him invite someone new kids over and facilitate the pair. This works the best. Some people have great experiences in scouts. I didn'twith my daughter. The leaders were awful and wantedmy daughter out of the group. These girls were the worsebullies, other people have great experiences and find themsupportive. best of luck,Pam >> My son was invited to a bday party for a classmate. My son likes the boy and I felt good that it was going to be small--only 4 boys total. > > When I arrived to pick up my son, the other boys were out playing on the lawn and I didn't see my son. I saw the dad outside and asked him where my boy was. He told me

he was inside. I get in and my son rushes to me crying and hugging me.> > The mom tells me that the boys were arguing over who didn't help clean up. She said the boys were in disagreement about who did more. This happened outside while the parents were inside. I asked her why she didn't call me. She said it just happenened. She added that her son was going to be punished. I just wanted to get my boy out and we left.> > As we drive off my son cries more and then tells me that two of the boys had kicked and punched him--one was the bday boy. How covenient that the mom left this out. My son told me he told the mom this as well.> > I feel just sick for my 8 year old boy. Now that I'm home I'm thinking why was her boy out playing? If they were going to punish him, wouldn't that had been the time to do it?> > My husband was upset that I left without getting more information from the mom. I'm now upset

that she didn't tell me the whole truth. Wouldn't the right thing had been to at least call me directly if she couldn't do it to my face? I feel like I have no choice but to write this family off totally if there is no attempt to heal the wounds they caused my boy. Should I just leave it alone with the write off? Would you call the mom?>

[Guest guest]

That's a good point. If your child usually misreads the situation,

then you would want to get more information before doing anything. of

course!

Roxanna

Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

( ) Son was hurt at birthday party

>

>

>

>

>

> My son was invited to a bday party for a classmate. My son likes the

> boy and I felt good that it was going to be small--only 4 boys total.

>

> When I arrived to pick up my son, the other boys were out playing on

> the lawn and I didn't see my son. I saw the dad outside and asked

him

> where my boy was. He told me he was inside. I get in and my son

rushes

> to me crying and hugging me.

>

> The mom tells me that the boys were arguing over who didn't help

clean

> up. She said the boys were in disagreement about who did more. This

> happened outside while the parents were inside. I asked her why she

> didn't call me. She said it just happenened. She added that her son

was

> going to be punished. I just wanted to get my boy out and we left.

>

> As we drive off my son cries more and then tells me that two of the

> boys had kicked and punched him--one was the bday boy. How covenient

> that the mom left this out. My son told me he told the mom this as

well.

>

> I feel just sick for my 8 year old boy. Now that I'm home I'm

thinking

> why was her boy out playing? If they were going to punish him,

wouldn't

> that had been the time to do it?

>

> My husband was upset that I left without getting more information

from

> the mom. I'm now upset that she didn't tell me the whole truth.

> Wouldn't the right thing had been to at least call me directly if she

> couldn't do it to my face? I feel like I have no choice but to write

> this family off totally if there is no attempt to heal the wounds

they

> caused my boy. Should I just leave it alone with the write off?

Would

> you call the mom?

>