Guest guest Posted January 20, 2011 Report Share Posted January 20, 2011 I am very sorry for what you are going through, my prayers are with you, From: Carolyn Weisbard <ccweisbard@...> Sent: Thu, January 20, 2011 11:27:57 AMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad I do have to admit that I am ultra sensitive. After learning on Tuesday that they couldn't rule out seizures for my daughter, it was about more than I could take. She will be hospitalized on Monday for a 2 day video EEG, has anyone gone through this before, and if so any suggestions?? I am super stressed!!! Carolyn From: chris Dunn <christineshello@...> Sent: Thu, January 20, 2011 10:20:09 AMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad Do not leave Carolyn, some people will take things personally, remember we are all ultra exhausted, ultra stressed and ultra sensitive, but we still care about each other. Let's move on because there lots of things to learn from each other. Roxanna is right nobody is upset with you, at least I am not, From: Roxanna <MadIdeas@...> Sent: Thu, January 20, 2011 10:49:54 AMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad No, don't leave Carolyn. I was thinking about this this morning and I really thought you were talking about the influx of posts about how to get a dx and not really her post about what "rule out" means. I totally got your point and I'm not upset with you either. I wish she had not taken it so personally but that happens sometimes. Roxanna"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Jefferson (AspergersSuppor t) Sad I am new to the group. My first post was the one about rule out as diagnosis. I have been too scared to post before, rightfully so after someone called it the prize to be had, the diagnosis that is. maybe I'm too soft but now I don't want to post anymore. I will continue to read and hope to gain knowledge but will not put myself out there. thanks, Jeana Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 20, 2011 Report Share Posted January 20, 2011 My son such an EEG to rule out seizures. It was fine. Be prepared that in our case someone had to be w him 24/7. I was prepared to stay w him of course but I didn't realize that I cudn't even go to the cafeteria w/out coverage. Otherwise it was almost restful w all the tV and books and nothing to worry about. Pax in sapientia,E.V. DowneyOn Jan 20, 2011, at 11:27 AM, Carolyn Weisbard <ccweisbard@...> wrote: I do have to admit that I am ultra sensitive. After learning on Tuesday that they couldn't rule out seizures for my daughter, it was about more than I could take. She will be hospitalized on Monday for a 2 day video EEG, has anyone gone through this before, and if so any suggestions?? I am super stressed!!! Carolyn From: chris Dunn <christineshello@...> Sent: Thu, January 20, 2011 10:20:09 AMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad Do not leave Carolyn, some people will take things personally, remember we are all ultra exhausted, ultra stressed and ultra sensitive, but we still care about each other. Let's move on because there lots of things to learn from each other. Roxanna is right nobody is upset with you, at least I am not, From: Roxanna <MadIdeas@...> Sent: Thu, January 20, 2011 10:49:54 AMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad No, don't leave Carolyn. I was thinking about this this morning and I really thought you were talking about the influx of posts about how to get a dx and not really her post about what "rule out" means. I totally got your point and I'm not upset with you either. I wish she had not taken it so personally but that happens sometimes. Roxanna"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Jefferson (AspergersSuppor t) Sad I am new to the group. My first post was the one about rule out as diagnosis. I have been too scared to post before, rightfully so after someone called it the prize to be had, the diagnosis that is. maybe I'm too soft but now I don't want to post anymore. I will continue to read and hope to gain knowledge but will not put myself out there. thanks, Jeana Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 20, 2011 Report Share Posted January 20, 2011 My heart goes out to you Carolyn! I hope all goes well with the EEG. Hugs to you and your daughter!! And like Roxanna said, don't leave the group. We are all under so much stress that our feelings can get hurt real easy sometimes. :-) ne From: Carolyn Weisbard <ccweisbard@...>Subject: Re: ( ) Sad Date: Thursday, January 20, 2011, 11:27 AM I do have to admit that I am ultra sensitive. After learning on Tuesday that they couldn't rule out seizures for my daughter, it was about more than I could take. She will be hospitalized on Monday for a 2 day video EEG, has anyone gone through this before, and if so any suggestions?? I am super stressed!!! Carolyn From: chris Dunn <christineshello@...> Sent: Thu, January 20, 2011 10:20:09 AMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad Do not leave Carolyn, some people will take things personally, remember we are all ultra exhausted, ultra stressed and ultra sensitive, but we still care about each other. Let's move on because there lots of things to learn from each other. Roxanna is right nobody is upset with you, at least I am not, From: Roxanna <MadIdeas@...> Sent: Thu, January 20, 2011 10:49:54 AMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad No, don't leave Carolyn. I was thinking about this this morning and I really thought you were talking about the influx of posts about how to get a dx and not really her post about what "rule out" means. I totally got your point and I'm not upset with you either. I wish she had not taken it so personally but that happens sometimes. Roxanna"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Jefferson (AspergersSuppor t) Sad I am new to the group. My first post was the one about rule out as diagnosis. I have been too scared to post before, rightfully so after someone called it the prize to be had, the diagnosis that is. maybe I'm too soft but now I don't want to post anymore. I will continue to read and hope to gain knowledge but will not put myself out there. thanks, Jeana Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 20, 2011 Report Share Posted January 20, 2011 Meaghan, you are absolutely right! This group has helped me a lot. Especially to know that I'm not alone and that others understand where I'm coming from. I can't talk to anyone about my son or our situation really except my husband and funny enough, my boss. But they are both men and don't "talk" much. :-) I have three sisters and a brother and none of them can relate or get it. My parents are very "old school" and for sure don't get it or seem to even try. Matter of fact I just got into a huge argument with my one older sister about my son. She has no kids of her own, much less a AS child but she wants to tell me that my son uses his "sickness" as she said it, as an excuse to be an a$$. We didn't even tell him about his Aspergers until this last year and he never says "I have AS" or anything even like it. But she said that he should get an A+ in manipulation etc etc. I finally had to cut her off and say that she has no clue what does on in our house. We haven't even lived near each other since my son was born. So...with that being said...this group has become a life, or should I say, sanity saver to me!! Thank you...and hugs to all!!ne From: Meaghan Larson <meaghanlarson@...>Subject: Re: ( ) Sad Date: Thursday, January 20, 2011, 1:48 AM Things get said that people dont mean , we all have our bad days where patience just runs a little thin! I remember reading the persons post that said that to you , and responding , and i feel kinda bad because i probably shouldnt have stepped in and said what i thought about the situation( i had a bad day that day) , you got a bad remark from one person , and that one person got like 6 remarks directed back to her! Sometimes its hard too , to know how people meant to say things because its in writing and your not hearing their tone of voice ya know? I think all of us just need to remember , that we are ALL trying to help eachother , and learn from one another! There were a few women i noticed when i first joined this group , that i was like " holy crap this person is blunt!" But the more posts from them i would read , and all the different sides of them that i would see , i quickly figured out that all the parents on here are just amazing people!! People will come and go from this group im sure , but everyone that sticks around will get to know everyone else's personality eventually , and everyone can benefit from this group , you say your too soft?? ....ok easy ...... go talk to Roxanna , she will toughen you up a bit if u want , she is seriously so smart and full of the BEST advice and i love that she is honest and speaks whats on her mind , i wish i could be more like that , and see thats why i love this group , because i do benefit from reading posts from parents who are maybe a little more tough then i am , because you do have to toughen up sometimes with the situation we are in!! And its NOT being insensitive to your feelings its just some of these women have been in this game for a long time , so they just are being honest and just want to help! Sometimes i will see what another parent posted to someone and think " well wait thats not what im doing, "and maybe feel a little bit defensive about it , i get defensive for a minute in my thinking because i know i SHOULD be doing it !! 9 times out of 10 i think " CRAP she is right again!" lol But from reading a lot of posts about their story i realize we have a lot in common with out children and struggles we go through , and im not saying one person is always right , and to do whatever they say , but i am sure glad i joined this group because i dont know what i would be doing right now without it!! I look forward to logging on to my computer every morning , because i know i will learn something from these women, and that benefits my boys!!! I live away from my family , i have no friends where i live because we just moved here , so i was really lonely before i joined this group! I grew up with 5 sisters , and with this group i kind of feel like i have a lil piece of that back!!! Good lord i wrote too much , i am so sorry you guys......this is why i cant drink mountain dew at 7 o clock at night!! , and sorry roxanna for puttin you on the spot like that , hope what i said about you doesnt offend you , i meant it all as compliments!!! but im sure a lot of women would agree , you are one of the parents that i will search for comments you post because you give parents a lot of hope and knowledge in your responses!! And that goes for all the rest of you moms and dads on here , ive learned atleast 1 thing from every single one of you!!! So i hope you dont leave the group, we all need eachother, i know i need all the support!! Meaghan From: Roxanna <MadIdeas@...> Sent: Wed, January 19, 2011 8:09:29 PMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad You are welcome to keep posting. It's up to you. I wouldn't want to let one person's comment spoil whatever you want to contribute or learn from the group. Many people replied in disagreement to that post anyway. I've been here a long time and people won't always agree or even say things nicely to each other all the time. I can say things wrong sometimes too. Or people take them worse than I meant it. At any rate, you had a good question and it was worth asking, IMO. Roxanna"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Jefferson ( ) Sad I am new to the group. My first post was the one about rule out as diagnosis. I have been too scared to post before, rightfully so after someone called it the prize to be had, the diagnosis that is. maybe I'm too soft but now I don't want to post anymore. I will continue to read and hope to gain knowledge but will not put myself out there. thanks, Jeana Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 21, 2011 Report Share Posted January 21, 2011 ne,Wow thats a pretty bold thing of your sister to say! My sister hasn't quite put it like that , but she tries to make the same point saying " hes FIIIIINE he just needs more discipline , your to much of a pushover" Which hurts a lot because its like , screw you , you have your 2 lil perfect daughters that have no problems fitting in or anything like that! Its a sad fact , but unless you live what we live , you have NO IDEA what its like, not to make it all sound bad , because its not! But even if someone from my family would just RECOGNIZE that they see what im talking about , or take the time to get to know what aspergers is really all about , that would make me feel happier around them!! Just because you watch one show on Dateline about a child with aspergers does not mean you know everything there is to know about the disorder! I would have to even admit that I myself really never fully understood what it was about until it came into my life! But atleast we have eachother , lord knows all you understand what its like!! My husband is probably sick of me talking about all you guys and your experiences ... i will just talk his ear off about some of the posts i read on here , and how happy or upset they make me feel! My husband as aspergers so he isnt to good with the " talk about your feelings thing" he tries tho , he knows this group means a lot to me , and since i have started talking to all you guys , i have been a lot more pleasant to be around my husband has told me ,even my sons OT therapist says she noticed a change in me , that i am more calm! Which makes sense because i just had to hold everything all in and not talk about it with anyone , so thanks to all of you , because i feel like i have my life back again , my personality back! And even my kids seem to have noticed that im less stressed , they want to be around me a lot more!! :)MeaghanFrom: susanne hansen <s_hansen34@...> Sent: Fri, January 21, 2011 12:41:30 AMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad Meaghan, you are absolutely right! This group has helped me a lot. Especially to know that I'm not alone and that others understand where I'm coming from. I can't talk to anyone about my son or our situation really except my husband and funny enough, my boss. But they are both men and don't "talk" much. :-) I have three sisters and a brother and none of them can relate or get it. My parents are very "old school" and for sure don't get it or seem to even try. Matter of fact I just got into a huge argument with my one older sister about my son. She has no kids of her own, much less a AS child but she wants to tell me that my son uses his "sickness" as she said it, as an excuse to be an a$$. We didn't even tell him about his Aspergers until this last year and he never says "I have AS" or anything even like it. But she said that he should get an A+ in manipulation etc etc. I finally had to cut her off and say that she has no clue what does on in our house. We haven't even lived near each other since my son was born. So...with that being said...this group has become a life, or should I say, sanity saver to me!! Thank you...and hugs to all!!ne From: Meaghan Larson <meaghanlarson@...>Subject: Re: ( ) Sad Date: Thursday, January 20, 2011, 1:48 AM Things get said that people dont mean , we all have our bad days where patience just runs a little thin! I remember reading the persons post that said that to you , and responding , and i feel kinda bad because i probably shouldnt have stepped in and said what i thought about the situation( i had a bad day that day) , you got a bad remark from one person , and that one person got like 6 remarks directed back to her! Sometimes its hard too , to know how people meant to say things because its in writing and your not hearing their tone of voice ya know? I think all of us just need to remember , that we are ALL trying to help eachother , and learn from one another! There were a few women i noticed when i first joined this group , that i was like " holy crap this person is blunt!" But the more posts from them i would read , and all the different sides of them that i would see , i quickly figured out that all the parents on here are just amazing people!! People will come and go from this group im sure , but everyone that sticks around will get to know everyone else's personality eventually , and everyone can benefit from this group , you say your too soft?? ....ok easy ...... go talk to Roxanna , she will toughen you up a bit if u want , she is seriously so smart and full of the BEST advice and i love that she is honest and speaks whats on her mind , i wish i could be more like that , and see thats why i love this group , because i do benefit from reading posts from parents who are maybe a little more tough then i am , because you do have to toughen up sometimes with the situation we are in!! And its NOT being insensitive to your feelings its just some of these women have been in this game for a long time , so they just are being honest and just want to help! Sometimes i will see what another parent posted to someone and think " well wait thats not what im doing, "and maybe feel a little bit defensive about it , i get defensive for a minute in my thinking because i know i SHOULD be doing it !! 9 times out of 10 i think " CRAP she is right again!" lol But from reading a lot of posts about their story i realize we have a lot in common with out children and struggles we go through , and im not saying one person is always right , and to do whatever they say , but i am sure glad i joined this group because i dont know what i would be doing right now without it!! I look forward to logging on to my computer every morning , because i know i will learn something from these women, and that benefits my boys!!! I live away from my family , i have no friends where i live because we just moved here , so i was really lonely before i joined this group! I grew up with 5 sisters , and with this group i kind of feel like i have a lil piece of that back!!! Good lord i wrote too much , i am so sorry you guys......this is why i cant drink mountain dew at 7 o clock at night!! , and sorry roxanna for puttin you on the spot like that , hope what i said about you doesnt offend you , i meant it all as compliments!!! but im sure a lot of women would agree , you are one of the parents that i will search for comments you post because you give parents a lot of hope and knowledge in your responses!! And that goes for all the rest of you moms and dads on here , ive learned atleast 1 thing from every single one of you!!! So i hope you dont leave the group, we all need eachother, i know i need all the support!! Meaghan From: Roxanna <MadIdeas@...> Sent: Wed, January 19, 2011 8:09:29 PMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad You are welcome to keep posting. It's up to you. I wouldn't want to let one person's comment spoil whatever you want to contribute or learn from the group. Many people replied in disagreement to that post anyway. I've been here a long time and people won't always agree or even say things nicely to each other all the time. I can say things wrong sometimes too. Or people take them worse than I meant it. At any rate, you had a good question and it was worth asking, IMO. Roxanna"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Jefferson ( ) Sad I am new to the group. My first post was the one about rule out as diagnosis. I have been too scared to post before, rightfully so after someone called it the prize to be had, the diagnosis that is. maybe I'm too soft but now I don't want to post anymore. I will continue to read and hope to gain knowledge but will not put myself out there. thanks, Jeana Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 21, 2011 Report Share Posted January 21, 2011 Just out of curiosity I wanted to ask a question. Does any body else feel like as if their child doesn't understand or get the concept of different things, like danger, friendship, some academic things (like numbers or letters)??? That is how I feel. We have had to find different ways to say things so that will understand better, maybe it is because she is so young, but she really does seem to be oblivious to the concept of these things! Carolyn From: Meaghan Larson <meaghanlarson@...> Sent: Fri, January 21, 2011 10:57:58 AMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad ne,Wow thats a pretty bold thing of your sister to say! My sister hasn't quite put it like that , but she tries to make the same point saying " hes FIIIIINE he just needs more discipline , your to much of a pushover" Which hurts a lot because its like , screw you , you have your 2 lil perfect daughters that have no problems fitting in or anything like that! Its a sad fact , but unless you live what we live , you have NO IDEA what its like, not to make it all sound bad , because its not! But even if someone from my family would just RECOGNIZE that they see what im talking about , or take the time to get to know what aspergers is really all about , that would make me feel happier around them!! Just because you watch one show on Dateline about a child with aspergers does not mean you know everything there is to know about the disorder! I would have to even admit that I myself really never fully understood what it was about until it came into my life! But atleast we have eachother , lord knows all you understand what its like!! My husband is probably sick of me talking about all you guys and your experiences ... i will just talk his ear off about some of the posts i read on here , and how happy or upset they make me feel! My husband as aspergers so he isnt to good with the " talk about your feelings thing" he tries tho , he knows this group means a lot to me , and since i have started talking to all you guys , i have been a lot more pleasant to be around my husband has told me ,even my sons OT therapist says she noticed a change in me , that i am more calm! Which makes sense because i just had to hold everything all in and not talk about it with anyone , so thanks to all of you , because i feel like i have my life back again , my personality back! And even my kids seem to have noticed that im less stressed , they want to be around me a lot more!! :)Meaghan From: susanne hansen <s_hansen34@...> Sent: Fri, January 21, 2011 12:41:30 AMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad Meaghan, you are absolutely right! This group has helped me a lot. Especially to know that I'm not alone and that others understand where I'm coming from. I can't talk to anyone about my son or our situation really except my husband and funny enough, my boss. But they are both men and don't "talk" much. :-) I have three sisters and a brother and none of them can relate or get it. My parents are very "old school" and for sure don't get it or seem to even try. Matter of fact I just got into a huge argument with my one older sister about my son. She has no kids of her own, much less a AS child but she wants to tell me that my son uses his "sickness" as she said it, as an excuse to be an a$$. We didn't even tell him about his Aspergers until this last year and he never says "I have AS" or anything even like it. But she said that he should get an A+ in manipulation etc etc. I finally had to cut her off and say that she has no clue what does on in our house. We haven't even lived near each other since my son was born. So...with that being said...this group has become a life, or should I say, sanity saver to me!! Thank you...and hugs to all!!ne From: Meaghan Larson <meaghanlarson@...>Subject: Re: ( ) Sad Date: Thursday, January 20, 2011, 1:48 AM Things get said that people dont mean , we all have our bad days where patience just runs a little thin! I remember reading the persons post that said that to you , and responding , and i feel kinda bad because i probably shouldnt have stepped in and said what i thought about the situation( i had a bad day that day) , you got a bad remark from one person , and that one person got like 6 remarks directed back to her! Sometimes its hard too , to know how people meant to say things because its in writing and your not hearing their tone of voice ya know? I think all of us just need to remember , that we are ALL trying to help eachother , and learn from one another! There were a few women i noticed when i first joined this group , that i was like " holy crap this person is blunt!" But the more posts from them i would read , and all the different sides of them that i would see , i quickly figured out that all the parents on here are just amazing people!! People will come and go from this group im sure , but everyone that sticks around will get to know everyone else's personality eventually , and everyone can benefit from this group , you say your too soft?? ....ok easy ...... go talk to Roxanna , she will toughen you up a bit if u want , she is seriously so smart and full of the BEST advice and i love that she is honest and speaks whats on her mind , i wish i could be more like that , and see thats why i love this group , because i do benefit from reading posts from parents who are maybe a little more tough then i am , because you do have to toughen up sometimes with the situation we are in!! And its NOT being insensitive to your feelings its just some of these women have been in this game for a long time , so they just are being honest and just want to help! Sometimes i will see what another parent posted to someone and think " well wait thats not what im doing, "and maybe feel a little bit defensive about it , i get defensive for a minute in my thinking because i know i SHOULD be doing it !! 9 times out of 10 i think " CRAP she is right again!" lol But from reading a lot of posts about their story i realize we have a lot in common with out children and struggles we go through , and im not saying one person is always right , and to do whatever they say , but i am sure glad i joined this group because i dont know what i would be doing right now without it!! I look forward to logging on to my computer every morning , because i know i will learn something from these women, and that benefits my boys!!! I live away from my family , i have no friends where i live because we just moved here , so i was really lonely before i joined this group! I grew up with 5 sisters , and with this group i kind of feel like i have a lil piece of that back!!! Good lord i wrote too much , i am so sorry you guys......this is why i cant drink mountain dew at 7 o clock at night!! , and sorry roxanna for puttin you on the spot like that , hope what i said about you doesnt offend you , i meant it all as compliments!!! but im sure a lot of women would agree , you are one of the parents that i will search for comments you post because you give parents a lot of hope and knowledge in your responses!! And that goes for all the rest of you moms and dads on here , ive learned atleast 1 thing from every single one of you!!! So i hope you dont leave the group, we all need eachother, i know i need all the support!! Meaghan From: Roxanna <MadIdeas@...> Sent: Wed, January 19, 2011 8:09:29 PMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad You are welcome to keep posting. It's up to you. I wouldn't want to let one person's comment spoil whatever you want to contribute or learn from the group. Many people replied in disagreement to that post anyway. I've been here a long time and people won't always agree or even say things nicely to each other all the time. I can say things wrong sometimes too. Or people take them worse than I meant it. At any rate, you had a good question and it was worth asking, IMO. Roxanna"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Jefferson ( ) Sad I am new to the group. My first post was the one about rule out as diagnosis. I have been too scared to post before, rightfully so after someone called it the prize to be had, the diagnosis that is. maybe I'm too soft but now I don't want to post anymore. I will continue to read and hope to gain knowledge but will not put myself out there. thanks, Jeana Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 21, 2011 Report Share Posted January 21, 2011 I'm a new person that just joined the group and I have an 18 year old ds with AS, AD/HD and depression. He will Never acknowledge that he has AS, only the ad/hd. Even this old, Nick doesn't understand that people take advantage of him, the dangers of doing certain drugs, why community college was harder than high school., why you have to be on time for class, and turn homework in on time.... essentially he doesn't understand any rules of society that he doesn't agree with. He barely made it thru hs, and spent over a year at Family Life Center, in Petaluma, CA for 10th and half of 11th grade. (He has an IQ of 147) He still thinks we sent him there because he was doing drugs with the seniors in the band, instead of to work on his social skills, and learn empathy and compassion. He has just failed out of this semester of community college, and is still doing some drugs. On the advice of our therapist, we have kicked him out of the house until he kicks the drugs and finds and holds his first job. We're not optimistic because he doesn't understand about socially appropriate responses for interviews. This morning, he was sleeping in our backyard shivering, and i invited him in for breakfast, a shower and a nap.... all things my therapist would disagree with. He STILL doesn't understand why we are doing this. I think I need to find an AS therapist to work this through. Nick never understood or learned from any of the consequences we have given him since 7th grade, so I'm not sure he will learn from this.... I remain as always torn, heartborken and in dispair. Reynolds Carlsbad, CA From: Meaghan Larson <meaghanlarson@...>Subject: Re: ( ) Sad Date: Thursday, January 20, 2011, 1:48 AM Things get said that people dont mean , we all have our bad days where patience just runs a little thin! I remember reading the persons post that said that to you , and responding , and i feel kinda bad because i probably shouldnt have stepped in and said what i thought about the situation( i had a bad day that day) , you got a bad remark from one person , and that one person got like 6 remarks directed back to her! Sometimes its hard too , to know how people meant to say things because its in writing and your not hearing their tone of voice ya know? I think all of us just need to remember , that we are ALL trying to help eachother , and learn from one another! There were a few women i noticed when i first joined this group , that i was like " holy crap this person is blunt!" But the more posts from them i would read , and all the different sides of them that i would see , i quickly figured out that all the parents on here are just amazing people!! People will come and go from this group im sure , but everyone that sticks around will get to know everyone else's personality eventually , and everyone can benefit from this group , you say your too soft?? ....ok easy ...... go talk to Roxanna , she will toughen you up a bit if u want , she is seriously so smart and full of the BEST advice and i love that she is honest and speaks whats on her mind , i wish i could be more like that , and see thats why i love this group , because i do benefit from reading posts from parents who are maybe a little more tough then i am , because you do have to toughen up sometimes with the situation we are in!! And its NOT being insensitive to your feelings its just some of these women have been in this game for a long time , so they just are being honest and just want to help! Sometimes i will see what another parent posted to someone and think " well wait thats not what im doing, "and maybe feel a little bit defensive about it , i get defensive for a minute in my thinking because i know i SHOULD be doing it !! 9 times out of 10 i think " CRAP she is right again!" lol But from reading a lot of posts about their story i realize we have a lot in common with out children and struggles we go through , and im not saying one person is always right , and to do whatever they say , but i am sure glad i joined this group because i dont know what i would be doing right now without it!! I look forward to logging on to my computer every morning , because i know i will learn something from these women, and that benefits my boys!!! I live away from my family , i have no friends where i live because we just moved here , so i was really lonely before i joined this group! I grew up with 5 sisters , and with this group i kind of feel like i have a lil piece of that back!!! Good lord i wrote too much , i am so sorry you guys......this is why i cant drink mountain dew at 7 o clock at night!! , and sorry roxanna for puttin you on the spot like that , hope what i said about you doesnt offend you , i meant it all as compliments!!! but im sure a lot of women would agree , you are one of the parents that i will search for comments you post because you give parents a lot of hope and knowledge in your responses!! And that goes for all the rest of you moms and dads on here , ive learned atleast 1 thing from every single one of you!!! So i hope you dont leave the group, we all need eachother, i know i need all the support!! Meaghan From: Roxanna <MadIdeas@...> Sent: Wed, January 19, 2011 8:09:29 PMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad You are welcome to keep posting. It's up to you. I wouldn't want to let one person's comment spoil whatever you want to contribute or learn from the group. Many people replied in disagreement to that post anyway. I've been here a long time and people won't always agree or even say things nicely to each other all the time. I can say things wrong sometimes too. Or people take them worse than I meant it. At any rate, you had a good question and it was worth asking, IMO. Roxanna"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Jefferson ( ) Sad I am new to the group. My first post was the one about rule out as diagnosis. I have been too scared to post before, rightfully so after someone called it the prize to be had, the diagnosis that is. maybe I'm too soft but now I don't want to post anymore. I will continue to read and hope to gain knowledge but will not put myself out there. thanks, Jeana Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 21, 2011 Report Share Posted January 21, 2011 Oh , Hugs to you. I hope you find a good AS therapist. Would they have any at your county Social Services Office? Robin "Normal is just a cycle on a washing machine....." From: Meaghan Larson <meaghanlarson@...>Subject: Re: ( ) Sad Date: Thursday, January 20, 2011, 1:48 AM Things get said that people dont mean , we all have our bad days where patience just runs a little thin! I remember reading the persons post that said that to you , and responding , and i feel kinda bad because i probably shouldnt have stepped in and said what i thought about the situation( i had a bad day that day) , you got a bad remark from one person , and that one person got like 6 remarks directed back to her! Sometimes its hard too , to know how people meant to say things because its in writing and your not hearing their tone of voice ya know? I think all of us just need to remember , that we are ALL trying to help eachother , and learn from one another! There were a few women i noticed when i first joined this group , that i was like " holy crap this person is blunt!" But the more posts from them i would read , and all the different sides of them that i would see , i quickly figured out that all the parents on here are just amazing people!! People will come and go from this group im sure , but everyone that sticks around will get to know everyone else's personality eventually , and everyone can benefit from this group , you say your too soft?? ....ok easy ...... go talk to Roxanna , she will toughen you up a bit if u want , she is seriously so smart and full of the BEST advice and i love that she is honest and speaks whats on her mind , i wish i could be more like that , and see thats why i love this group , because i do benefit from reading posts from parents who are maybe a little more tough then i am , because you do have to toughen up sometimes with the situation we are in!! And its NOT being insensitive to your feelings its just some of these women have been in this game for a long time , so they just are being honest and just want to help! Sometimes i will see what another parent posted to someone and think " well wait thats not what im doing, "and maybe feel a little bit defensive about it , i get defensive for a minute in my thinking because i know i SHOULD be doing it !! 9 times out of 10 i think " CRAP she is right again!" lol But from reading a lot of posts about their story i realize we have a lot in common with out children and struggles we go through , and im not saying one person is always right , and to do whatever they say , but i am sure glad i joined this group because i dont know what i would be doing right now without it!! I look forward to logging on to my computer every morning , because i know i will learn something from these women, and that benefits my boys!!! I live away from my family , i have no friends where i live because we just moved here , so i was really lonely before i joined this group! I grew up with 5 sisters , and with this group i kind of feel like i have a lil piece of that back!!! Good lord i wrote too much , i am so sorry you guys......this is why i cant drink mountain dew at 7 o clock at night!! , and sorry roxanna for puttin you on the spot like that , hope what i said about you doesnt offend you , i meant it all as compliments!!! but im sure a lot of women would agree , you are one of the parents that i will search for comments you post because you give parents a lot of hope and knowledge in your responses!! And that goes for all the rest of you moms and dads on here , ive learned atleast 1 thing from every single one of you!!! So i hope you dont leave the group, we all need eachother, i know i need all the support!! Meaghan From: Roxanna <MadIdeas@...> Sent: Wed, January 19, 2011 8:09:29 PMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad You are welcome to keep posting. It's up to you. I wouldn't want to let one person's comment spoil whatever you want to contribute or learn from the group. Many people replied in disagreement to that post anyway. I've been here a long time and people won't always agree or even say things nicely to each other all the time. I can say things wrong sometimes too. Or people take them worse than I meant it. At any rate, you had a good question and it was worth asking, IMO. Roxanna"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Jefferson ( ) Sad I am new to the group. My first post was the one about rule out as diagnosis. I have been too scared to post before, rightfully so after someone called it the prize to be had, the diagnosis that is. maybe I'm too soft but now I don't want to post anymore. I will continue to read and hope to gain knowledge but will not put myself out there. thanks, Jeana Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 21, 2011 Report Share Posted January 21, 2011 Hi ne I have found in the past until people have a child of their own with any kind of health issues they are too quick to judge. I have seen people stare and tut and look disgusted at children playing up ie, supermarket, they label them as naughty out of control kids, but how do they know they don't have something wrong with them. I also find the elderly are worst, they look at the parents as if to say control your kids mine would never have been allowed to behave like that. For example, I was in the chemist a few weeks ago and there was a young mum with a poorly toddler, who kept crying he just didn't know what to do with himself, and this old guy was mumbling and tutting at the baby, I just said he is poorly go and stand over there if he is getting on your nerves, it really gets to me when people are too quick to label people. Friends and family who can't accept you and your family for who you are are not worth knowing never mind being part of your lives, you know the genuine ones when they will accept you no matter what with warts n all. Its like with marissa I could have said to my son I don't want her at my house, but no I want to find out and get a better understanding of what she is going through. Carolyn From: susanne hansen <s_hansen34@...> Sent: Fri, 21 January, 2011 6:41:30Subject: Re: ( ) Sad Meaghan, you are absolutely right! This group has helped me a lot. Especially to know that I'm not alone and that others understand where I'm coming from. I can't talk to anyone about my son or our situation really except my husband and funny enough, my boss. But they are both men and don't "talk" much. :-) I have three sisters and a brother and none of them can relate or get it. My parents are very "old school" and for sure don't get it or seem to even try. Matter of fact I just got into a huge argument with my one older sister about my son. She has no kids of her own, much less a AS child but she wants to tell me that my son uses his "sickness" as she said it, as an excuse to be an a$$. We didn't even tell him about his Aspergers until this last year and he never says "I have AS" or anything even like it. But she said that he should get an A+ in manipulation etc etc. I finally had to cut her off and say that she has no clue what does on in our house. We haven't even lived near each other since my son was born. So...with that being said...this group has become a life, or should I say, sanity saver to me!! Thank you...and hugs to all!!ne From: Meaghan Larson <meaghanlarson@...>Subject: Re: ( ) Sad Date: Thursday, January 20, 2011, 1:48 AM Things get said that people dont mean , we all have our bad days where patience just runs a little thin! I remember reading the persons post that said that to you , and responding , and i feel kinda bad because i probably shouldnt have stepped in and said what i thought about the situation( i had a bad day that day) , you got a bad remark from one person , and that one person got like 6 remarks directed back to her! Sometimes its hard too , to know how people meant to say things because its in writing and your not hearing their tone of voice ya know? I think all of us just need to remember , that we are ALL trying to help eachother , and learn from one another! There were a few women i noticed when i first joined this group , that i was like " holy crap this person is blunt!" But the more posts from them i would read , and all the different sides of them that i would see , i quickly figured out that all the parents on here are just amazing people!! People will come and go from this group im sure , but everyone that sticks around will get to know everyone else's personality eventually , and everyone can benefit from this group , you say your too soft?? ....ok easy ...... go talk to Roxanna , she will toughen you up a bit if u want , she is seriously so smart and full of the BEST advice and i love that she is honest and speaks whats on her mind , i wish i could be more like that , and see thats why i love this group , because i do benefit from reading posts from parents who are maybe a little more tough then i am , because you do have to toughen up sometimes with the situation we are in!! And its NOT being insensitive to your feelings its just some of these women have been in this game for a long time , so they just are being honest and just want to help! Sometimes i will see what another parent posted to someone and think " well wait thats not what im doing, "and maybe feel a little bit defensive about it , i get defensive for a minute in my thinking because i know i SHOULD be doing it !! 9 times out of 10 i think " CRAP she is right again!" lol But from reading a lot of posts about their story i realize we have a lot in common with out children and struggles we go through , and im not saying one person is always right , and to do whatever they say , but i am sure glad i joined this group because i dont know what i would be doing right now without it!! I look forward to logging on to my computer every morning , because i know i will learn something from these women, and that benefits my boys!!! I live away from my family , i have no friends where i live because we just moved here , so i was really lonely before i joined this group! I grew up with 5 sisters , and with this group i kind of feel like i have a lil piece of that back!!! Good lord i wrote too much , i am so sorry you guys......this is why i cant drink mountain dew at 7 o clock at night!! , and sorry roxanna for puttin you on the spot like that , hope what i said about you doesnt offend you , i meant it all as compliments!!! but im sure a lot of women would agree , you are one of the parents that i will search for comments you post because you give parents a lot of hope and knowledge in your responses!! And that goes for all the rest of you moms and dads on here , ive learned atleast 1 thing from every single one of you!!! So i hope you dont leave the group, we all need eachother, i know i need all the support!! Meaghan From: Roxanna <MadIdeas@...> Sent: Wed, January 19, 2011 8:09:29 PMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad You are welcome to keep posting. It's up to you. I wouldn't want to let one person's comment spoil whatever you want to contribute or learn from the group. Many people replied in disagreement to that post anyway. I've been here a long time and people won't always agree or even say things nicely to each other all the time. I can say things wrong sometimes too. Or people take them worse than I meant it. At any rate, you had a good question and it was worth asking, IMO. Roxanna"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Jefferson ( ) Sad I am new to the group. My first post was the one about rule out as diagnosis. I have been too scared to post before, rightfully so after someone called it the prize to be had, the diagnosis that is. maybe I'm too soft but now I don't want to post anymore. I will continue to read and hope to gain knowledge but will not put myself out there. thanks, Jeana Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 21, 2011 Report Share Posted January 21, 2011 , I'm so sad for your situation. My prayers are with you and your son. I hope you find help for him. It is such a difficult situation to be in. I can't imagine what you're going through. AS kids mature much slower than NT kids. Your son will probably take several more years before he reaches the maturity of a NT 18 yr old. Maybe he needs more intense help right now. Like some type of resident treatment facility that can help him get off the drugs as well as provide therapy. I don't know...just an idea. Take care!ne From: Meaghan Larson <meaghanlarson@...>Subject: Re: ( ) Sad Date: Thursday, January 20, 2011, 1:48 AM Things get said that people dont mean , we all have our bad days where patience just runs a little thin! I remember reading the persons post that said that to you , and responding , and i feel kinda bad because i probably shouldnt have stepped in and said what i thought about the situation( i had a bad day that day) , you got a bad remark from one person , and that one person got like 6 remarks directed back to her! Sometimes its hard too , to know how people meant to say things because its in writing and your not hearing their tone of voice ya know? I think all of us just need to remember , that we are ALL trying to help eachother , and learn from one another! There were a few women i noticed when i first joined this group , that i was like " holy crap this person is blunt!" But the more posts from them i would read , and all the different sides of them that i would see , i quickly figured out that all the parents on here are just amazing people!! People will come and go from this group im sure , but everyone that sticks around will get to know everyone else's personality eventually , and everyone can benefit from this group , you say your too soft?? ....ok easy ...... go talk to Roxanna , she will toughen you up a bit if u want , she is seriously so smart and full of the BEST advice and i love that she is honest and speaks whats on her mind , i wish i could be more like that , and see thats why i love this group , because i do benefit from reading posts from parents who are maybe a little more tough then i am , because you do have to toughen up sometimes with the situation we are in!! And its NOT being insensitive to your feelings its just some of these women have been in this game for a long time , so they just are being honest and just want to help! Sometimes i will see what another parent posted to someone and think " well wait thats not what im doing, "and maybe feel a little bit defensive about it , i get defensive for a minute in my thinking because i know i SHOULD be doing it !! 9 times out of 10 i think " CRAP she is right again!" lol But from reading a lot of posts about their story i realize we have a lot in common with out children and struggles we go through , and im not saying one person is always right , and to do whatever they say , but i am sure glad i joined this group because i dont know what i would be doing right now without it!! I look forward to logging on to my computer every morning , because i know i will learn something from these women, and that benefits my boys!!! I live away from my family , i have no friends where i live because we just moved here , so i was really lonely before i joined this group! I grew up with 5 sisters , and with this group i kind of feel like i have a lil piece of that back!!! Good lord i wrote too much , i am so sorry you guys......this is why i cant drink mountain dew at 7 o clock at night!! , and sorry roxanna for puttin you on the spot like that , hope what i said about you doesnt offend you , i meant it all as compliments!!! but im sure a lot of women would agree , you are one of the parents that i will search for comments you post because you give parents a lot of hope and knowledge in your responses!! And that goes for all the rest of you moms and dads on here , ive learned atleast 1 thing from every single one of you!!! So i hope you dont leave the group, we all need eachother, i know i need all the support!! Meaghan From: Roxanna <MadIdeas@...> Sent: Wed, January 19, 2011 8:09:29 PMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad You are welcome to keep posting. It's up to you. I wouldn't want to let one person's comment spoil whatever you want to contribute or learn from the group. Many people replied in disagreement to that post anyway. I've been here a long time and people won't always agree or even say things nicely to each other all the time. I can say things wrong sometimes too. Or people take them worse than I meant it. At any rate, you had a good question and it was worth asking, IMO. Roxanna"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Jefferson ( ) Sad I am new to the group. My first post was the one about rule out as diagnosis. I have been too scared to post before, rightfully so after someone called it the prize to be had, the diagnosis that is. maybe I'm too soft but now I don't want to post anymore. I will continue to read and hope to gain knowledge but will not put myself out there. thanks, Jeana Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 21, 2011 Report Share Posted January 21, 2011 Meaghan, It does hurt and is frustrating when you have family that doesn't try to understand. Actually they do the opposite and criticize or judge. They have no clue what AS is about but they want to tell us what they think we're doing wrong. I haven't spoken to my sister since. I told her that we will just have to agree to disagree because there is no way I'm going to take her perspective. I told her that it has been difficult enough raising an AS child and fighting with the school all the time, but what makes it so much worse it having family that is so unsupported. I have two grand-kids myself, a grandson from my daughter, and a granddaughter from my son. They are both about 2 1/2. If either one of them, God forbid, were to be diagnosed with ANYTHING, I would pour my heart into researching it and trying to find out as much as I could. I would be supportive and stand by my children's side. My grandson is speech delayed because he had several ear infections and had to have tubes put in his ears. Now that he can hear I've told my daughter to get him assessed for speech pathology. I talk to her all the time and help her with suggestions and listen to her concerns. She is all the way in WY, so I don't see her often but I'm there for her as much as I can be. I guess that is too much for me to expect from my family though. Oh well, I have the most amazing best friend which is my husband and now all of you guys! I'm glad for that and I'm glad that maybe I can help someone else in return! :-)ne From: Meaghan Larson <meaghanlarson@...>Subject: Re: ( ) Sad Date: Thursday, January 20, 2011, 1:48 AM Things get said that people dont mean , we all have our bad days where patience just runs a little thin! I remember reading the persons post that said that to you , and responding , and i feel kinda bad because i probably shouldnt have stepped in and said what i thought about the situation( i had a bad day that day) , you got a bad remark from one person , and that one person got like 6 remarks directed back to her! Sometimes its hard too , to know how people meant to say things because its in writing and your not hearing their tone of voice ya know? I think all of us just need to remember , that we are ALL trying to help eachother , and learn from one another! There were a few women i noticed when i first joined this group , that i was like " holy crap this person is blunt!" But the more posts from them i would read , and all the different sides of them that i would see , i quickly figured out that all the parents on here are just amazing people!! People will come and go from this group im sure , but everyone that sticks around will get to know everyone else's personality eventually , and everyone can benefit from this group , you say your too soft?? ....ok easy ...... go talk to Roxanna , she will toughen you up a bit if u want , she is seriously so smart and full of the BEST advice and i love that she is honest and speaks whats on her mind , i wish i could be more like that , and see thats why i love this group , because i do benefit from reading posts from parents who are maybe a little more tough then i am , because you do have to toughen up sometimes with the situation we are in!! And its NOT being insensitive to your feelings its just some of these women have been in this game for a long time , so they just are being honest and just want to help! Sometimes i will see what another parent posted to someone and think " well wait thats not what im doing, "and maybe feel a little bit defensive about it , i get defensive for a minute in my thinking because i know i SHOULD be doing it !! 9 times out of 10 i think " CRAP she is right again!" lol But from reading a lot of posts about their story i realize we have a lot in common with out children and struggles we go through , and im not saying one person is always right , and to do whatever they say , but i am sure glad i joined this group because i dont know what i would be doing right now without it!! I look forward to logging on to my computer every morning , because i know i will learn something from these women, and that benefits my boys!!! I live away from my family , i have no friends where i live because we just moved here , so i was really lonely before i joined this group! I grew up with 5 sisters , and with this group i kind of feel like i have a lil piece of that back!!! Good lord i wrote too much , i am so sorry you guys......this is why i cant drink mountain dew at 7 o clock at night!! , and sorry roxanna for puttin you on the spot like that , hope what i said about you doesnt offend you , i meant it all as compliments!!! but im sure a lot of women would agree , you are one of the parents that i will search for comments you post because you give parents a lot of hope and knowledge in your responses!! And that goes for all the rest of you moms and dads on here , ive learned atleast 1 thing from every single one of you!!! So i hope you dont leave the group, we all need eachother, i know i need all the support!! Meaghan From: Roxanna <MadIdeas@...> Sent: Wed, January 19, 2011 8:09:29 PMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad You are welcome to keep posting. It's up to you. I wouldn't want to let one person's comment spoil whatever you want to contribute or learn from the group. Many people replied in disagreement to that post anyway. I've been here a long time and people won't always agree or even say things nicely to each other all the time. I can say things wrong sometimes too. Or people take them worse than I meant it. At any rate, you had a good question and it was worth asking, IMO. Roxanna"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Jefferson ( ) Sad I am new to the group. My first post was the one about rule out as diagnosis. I have been too scared to post before, rightfully so after someone called it the prize to be had, the diagnosis that is. maybe I'm too soft but now I don't want to post anymore. I will continue to read and hope to gain knowledge but will not put myself out there. thanks, Jeana Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2011 Report Share Posted January 31, 2011 Hi , I just wanted to see how things are going with you and your son. I hope all is going well. Please keep in touch with the group. We are here is you need us. ne From: Meaghan Larson <meaghanlarson@...>Subject: Re: ( ) Sad Date: Thursday, January 20, 2011, 1:48 AM Things get said that people dont mean , we all have our bad days where patience just runs a little thin! I remember reading the persons post that said that to you , and responding , and i feel kinda bad because i probably shouldnt have stepped in and said what i thought about the situation( i had a bad day that day) , you got a bad remark from one person , and that one person got like 6 remarks directed back to her! Sometimes its hard too , to know how people meant to say things because its in writing and your not hearing their tone of voice ya know? I think all of us just need to remember , that we are ALL trying to help eachother , and learn from one another! There were a few women i noticed when i first joined this group , that i was like " holy crap this person is blunt!" But the more posts from them i would read , and all the different sides of them that i would see , i quickly figured out that all the parents on here are just amazing people!! People will come and go from this group im sure , but everyone that sticks around will get to know everyone else's personality eventually , and everyone can benefit from this group , you say your too soft?? ....ok easy ...... go talk to Roxanna , she will toughen you up a bit if u want , she is seriously so smart and full of the BEST advice and i love that she is honest and speaks whats on her mind , i wish i could be more like that , and see thats why i love this group , because i do benefit from reading posts from parents who are maybe a little more tough then i am , because you do have to toughen up sometimes with the situation we are in!! And its NOT being insensitive to your feelings its just some of these women have been in this game for a long time , so they just are being honest and just want to help! Sometimes i will see what another parent posted to someone and think " well wait thats not what im doing, "and maybe feel a little bit defensive about it , i get defensive for a minute in my thinking because i know i SHOULD be doing it !! 9 times out of 10 i think " CRAP she is right again!" lol But from reading a lot of posts about their story i realize we have a lot in common with out children and struggles we go through , and im not saying one person is always right , and to do whatever they say , but i am sure glad i joined this group because i dont know what i would be doing right now without it!! I look forward to logging on to my computer every morning , because i know i will learn something from these women, and that benefits my boys!!! I live away from my family , i have no friends where i live because we just moved here , so i was really lonely before i joined this group! I grew up with 5 sisters , and with this group i kind of feel like i have a lil piece of that back!!! Good lord i wrote too much , i am so sorry you guys......this is why i cant drink mountain dew at 7 o clock at night!! , and sorry roxanna for puttin you on the spot like that , hope what i said about you doesnt offend you , i meant it all as compliments!!! but im sure a lot of women would agree , you are one of the parents that i will search for comments you post because you give parents a lot of hope and knowledge in your responses!! And that goes for all the rest of you moms and dads on here , ive learned atleast 1 thing from every single one of you!!! So i hope you dont leave the group, we all need eachother, i know i need all the support!! Meaghan From: Roxanna <MadIdeas@...> Sent: Wed, January 19, 2011 8:09:29 PMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad You are welcome to keep posting. It's up to you. I wouldn't want to let one person's comment spoil whatever you want to contribute or learn from the group. Many people replied in disagreement to that post anyway. I've been here a long time and people won't always agree or even say things nicely to each other all the time. I can say things wrong sometimes too. Or people take them worse than I meant it. At any rate, you had a good question and it was worth asking, IMO. Roxanna"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Jefferson ( ) Sad I am new to the group. My first post was the one about rule out as diagnosis. I have been too scared to post before, rightfully so after someone called it the prize to be had, the diagnosis that is. maybe I'm too soft but now I don't want to post anymore. I will continue to read and hope to gain knowledge but will not put myself out there. thanks, Jeana Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 1, 2011 Report Share Posted February 1, 2011 I was wondering how you and your Son were doing too. We have a 23 yr old who has had some of the same issues, and I agree that you should find a therapist that knows AS because I do not think what yours is suggesting will help. It isn't that our " kids " can be forced to learn the rules of society or what they need to do, it is there perception of the world leads them to believe they are doing what is right. So what is needed is for them to understand what is happening to them first, then to figure out how to cope with this so they can do what is more accepted by society. I am no doctor or therapist, but I think that tough love won't cure what he has! The drug issue is one we are not dealing with - that I am not sure how to deal with...except to say I believe this is often a cry for help in AS and other young people with OCD and similar afflictions. They are trying to feel normal and the drugs are an escape. Sometimes changing or adding medications will help them stop. Wondering which way to go with all this myself, but that is my two cents - I hope all is going better! mark > > > From: Meaghan Larson <meaghanlarson@...> > Subject: Re: ( ) Sad > > Date: Thursday, January 20, 2011, 1:48 AM > > >  > > > Things get said that people dont mean , we all have our bad days where patience just runs a little thin! I remember reading the persons post that said that to you , and responding , and i feel kinda bad because i probably shouldnt have stepped in and said what i thought about the situation( i had a bad day that day) , you got a bad remark from one person , and that one person got like 6 remarks directed back to her! Sometimes its hard too , to know how people meant to say things because its in writing and your not hearing their tone of voice ya know? I think all of us just need to remember , that we are ALL trying to help eachother , and learn from one another! > >  There were a few women i noticed when i first joined this group , that i was like " holy crap this person is blunt! " But the more posts from them i would read , and all the different sides of them that i would see , i quickly figured out that all the parents on here are just amazing people!! People will come and go from this group im sure , but everyone that sticks around will get to know everyone else's personality eventually , and everyone can benefit from this group , you say your too soft?? ....ok easy ...... go talk to Roxanna , she will toughen you up a bit if u want , she is seriously so smart and full of the BEST advice and i love that she is honest and speaks whats on her mind , i wish i could be more like that , and see thats why i love this group , because i do benefit from reading posts from parents who are maybe a little more tough then i am , because you do have to toughen up sometimes with the situation we are in!! > > And its NOT being insensitive to your feelings its just some of these women have been in this game for a long time , so they just are being honest and just want to help! Sometimes i will see what another parent posted to someone and think " well wait thats not what im doing, " and maybe feel a little bit defensive about it , i get defensive for a minute in my thinking because i know i SHOULD be doing it !! 9 times out of 10  i think > " CRAP she is right again! " lol But from reading a lot of posts about their story i realize we have a lot in common with out children and struggles we go through , and im not saying one person is always right , and to do whatever they say , but i am sure glad i joined this group because i dont know what i would be doing right now without it!! I look forward to logging on to my computer every morning , because i know i will learn something from these women, and that benefits my boys!!! I live away from my family , i have no friends where i live because we just moved here , so i was really lonely before i joined this group! I grew up with 5 sisters , and with this group i kind of feel like i have a lil piece of that back!!! > > Good lord i wrote too much , i am so sorry you guys......this is why i cant drink mountain dew at 7 o clock at night!! , and sorry roxanna for puttin you on the spot like that , hope what i said about you doesnt offend you , i meant it all as compliments!!! but im sure a lot of women would agree , you are one of the parents that i will search for comments you post because you give parents a lot of hope and knowledge in your responses!! And that goes for all the rest of you moms and dads on here , ive learned atleast 1 thing from every single one of you!!! So i hope you dont leave the group, we all need eachother, i know i need all the support!! > > Meaghan > > > > > > > > > From: Roxanna <MadIdeas@...> > > Sent: Wed, January 19, 2011 8:09:29 PM > Subject: Re: ( ) Sad > >  > > You are welcome to keep posting. It's up to you. I wouldn't want to let one person's comment spoil whatever you want to contribute or learn from the group. Many people replied in disagreement to that post anyway. I've been here a long time and people won't always agree or even say things nicely to each other all the time. I can say things wrong sometimes too. Or people take them worse than I meant it. > > At any rate, you had a good question and it was worth asking, IMO. > > > > > > > Roxanna > " I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them. " - Jefferson > > > > > ( ) Sad > > >  > > > > > I am new to the group. My first post was the one about rule out as diagnosis. I have been too scared to post before, rightfully so after someone called it the prize to be had, the diagnosis that is. maybe I'm too soft but now I don't want to post anymore. I will continue to read and hope to gain knowledge but will not put myself out there. thanks, Jeana > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 Yeah wow , i really wrote a novel there didnt i!! lol Hope everyone understood what i was trying to say ... if they even took the hour and half to read the whole post! lol I love all you guys..i feel im a little bit stronger today then i was before i joined this group , not only mentally , but just all the knowledge i have learned really gives me the confidence that i can do this, and do it the way thats best for my son . :)MeaghanFrom: Roxanna <MadIdeas@...> Sent: Tue, February 15, 2011 9:03:00 AMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad Meaghan, lol, I am glad to see you can find something redeeming in me. <GG> That is nice of you to say. I think that happens to me a lot where people think I am being a bit snippy. (ha ha) And yes, some of us have been here for a long time and been dealing with it a long time! So we can see the end result of certain paths that people are on and can provide fair warning. But it is not meant to be mean. I think if people hang around long enough, they will see what you found out about us. I think the posts in this thread were interesting. I know I like hearing different POV's. I often think I know something and then when I see someone else post, I learn a new side to it. Even the bad ideas are worthwhile because you can think of why it's a bad idea. It helps reinforce why you want to do it a different way or why it won't work for you that way. It's all good! Roxanna “Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.†- Luther King, Jr. ( ) Sad I am new to the group. My first post was the one about rule out as diagnosis. I have been too scared to post before, rightfully so after someone called it the prize to be had, the diagnosis that is. maybe I'm too soft but now I don't want to post anymore. I will continue to read and hope to gain knowledge but will not put myself out there. thanks, Jeana Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 Perfectly said. It's nice to know that we all have somewhere to go to get totally honest advice......cause no one has to look "us" in the eyes. Ya know? We say it how we feel. I love this. Robin "I'm singing.... I'm in a store and I'm singing.......... I'm in a store.... and I'm singing..............." From: Meaghan Larson <meaghanlarson@...>Subject: Re: ( ) Sad Date: Tuesday, February 15, 2011, 12:15 PM Yeah wow , i really wrote a novel there didnt i!! lol Hope everyone understood what i was trying to say ... if they even took the hour and half to read the whole post! lol I love all you guys..i feel im a little bit stronger today then i was before i joined this group , not only mentally , but just all the knowledge i have learned really gives me the confidence that i can do this, and do it the way thats best for my son . :)Meaghan From: Roxanna <MadIdeas@...> Sent: Tue, February 15, 2011 9:03:00 AMSubject: Re: ( ) Sad Meaghan, lol, I am glad to see you can find something redeeming in me. <GG> That is nice of you to say. I think that happens to me a lot where people think I am being a bit snippy. (ha ha) And yes, some of us have been here for a long time and been dealing with it a long time! So we can see the end result of certain paths that people are on and can provide fair warning. But it is not meant to be mean. I think if people hang around long enough, they will see what you found out about us. I think the posts in this thread were interesting. I know I like hearing different POV's. I often think I know something and then when I see someone else post, I learn a new side to it. Even the bad ideas are worthwhile because you can think of why it's a bad idea. It helps reinforce why you want to do it a different way or why it won't work for you that way. It's all good! Roxanna“Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.†- Luther King, Jr. ( ) Sad I am new to the group. My first post was the one about rule out as diagnosis. I have been too scared to post before, rightfully so after someone called it the prize to be had, the diagnosis that is. maybe I'm too soft but now I don't want to post anymore. I will continue to read and hope to gain knowledge but will not put myself out there. thanks, Jeana Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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