Guest guest Posted August 27, 2004 Report Share Posted August 27, 2004 I'm convinced we have a whole family of adult aspies although none have ever been diagnosed. Some in the younger generation are and since they act just like the adults did as children I feel it backs up my opinion. We have three sons, all of whom show some signs. Our middle son (almost 28)still lives at home but I think he could live in his own eventually. The biggest problem with him is he is easily influenced by friends. He seems to eventually catch on to mistakes in his choices but not immediately. His latest unwise decision has left him around $52,000 in debt. I would say that the biggest challenge my son has as an adult is his lack of common sense and not thinking ahead. He can feed on his bi-polar friend's frenzy and get into trouble trying to keep up with him. He also has a problem dealing with creditors and/or bosses at work because they interpret his lack of emotions as lack of caring. Mostly they just have some inappropriate behavior at times - saying things outloud they shouldn't, telling jokes that no one but our family understands and outsiders might take as being rude. They also have a tendency to talk to people like they are ignorant or children. I always thought these problems were just our family's personality but now I realize it wasn't something learned but genetic. Ann__________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 28, 2004 Report Share Posted August 28, 2004 Ann <ole_crone@...> wrote: I'm convinced we have a whole family of adult aspies although none have ever been diagnosed. Some in the younger generation are and since they act just like the adults did as children I feel it backs up my opinion. We have three sons, all of whom show some signs. Our middle son (almost 28)still lives at home but I think he could live in his own eventually. The biggest problem with him is he is easily influenced by friends. He seems to eventually catch on to mistakes in his choices but not immediately. His latest unwise decision has left him around $52,000 in debt. I would say that the biggest challenge my son has as an adult is his lack of common sense and not thinking ahead. He can feed on his bi-polar friend's frenzy and get into trouble trying to keep up with him. He also has a problem dealing with creditors and/or bosses at work because they interpret his lack of emotions as lack of caring. Mostly they just have some inappropriate behavior at times - saying things outloud they shouldn't, telling jokes that no one but our family understands and outsiders might take as being rude. They also have a tendency to talk to people like they are ignorant or children. I always thought these problems were just our family's personality but now I realize it wasn't something learned but genetic. Ann DEAR MARY ANN READERS Aspie seems to run in families and sadily modern Autism treatments tend to make lots of Aspie conditions WORSE. I'm part of a living unstudied Aspie Anthropology of Aspies worldwide that are old enough to have missed diagnosis (due to our ages) and we also grew up in a time an era when shcool and discpline were strict. That along with a social twist to Autism ,were also in the Gay Spectrum means we were the lucky ones that have totally figured out autism. We Drive hold normal jobs and have families. We have learned to use our picture thoughts (autism) and blend them in to real life. Gay before it was cool to be gay ment being part of a underground social click and in affect forced us and our Autism into finding ways to get along. Our Straight counterparts of the same era know autism as well as we do but often present like the Rain Man sterotype. Modern Autism has known about us for years now, and refuses to admit to us as first we are GLBT and second we do everything Autism claims as impossible, then we grew up with out threir diets and ABA (OUPS) and don't live in group homes. We have noticed that many of us share the same geneology and often camoe from the same areas of a country and even have common relitives. WE Also notice Sadly, there are members of our families (aspie or not?) that are just (with Respect) idiots when it comes to some things They don't do the right stuff socially and don't seem to understand the real world or the idea of money and its wise use. Many of us are caring for babysitting a mother or father -sometimes a brother or sister- that just needs extra help and steady hand to get along. We have also noted in many of our families several of us have a condition where the spinal cord starts dieing in stages (genetic condition)and that physically cripples one and before that happens it make their reasoning power even worse. My Grandmother and lots of her relitives had it and my mom is showing signs of the same thing.Lots of Mom's side of the family could have been considered Autistic. We are in the progess of doing our Own Study on our Anthropology. Our Remarkable Autism stories were repeated in blindbackwards experiments in Autism that we all unknowingly did on our own. Today despite living in many different countries and spaeaking many different languages We all have the same versions of autisitc thoughts. Autism is more Like the stuff Temple Grandin wrote about than the modern stuff that is worried about ABA and diets. Many Autism researchers are less than sincere we have found,and were NEVER expecting a polulation of informed critques ,knocking at their door. True researchers (intrigued and symepthetic) are not allowed to study us as their univerisity or the Autism socieities and non-profits they often work for could be taking a real chance on figuring us out, perhaps they might even loose some funding? Besides many of them make handsome saleries themselves. Rich Ps TO See Autism in action (old version) Look Up on the Net Alan Turing he was father of the computer and a older undiagnosed Gay Aspie. Many in our anthropology mirror him and his work. __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 26, 2010 Report Share Posted October 26, 2010 Aw heck...I am blushing here. I agree. That was very well-said! Heh...sometimes I don't even feel that well-adjusted lol! I guess that just comes with the territory, though, and it is tolerable most days. It really was a long road to where I am now and a LOT of hard work, changing some behaviors and a lot of looking inside myself to say I may be a little "different" from "normal" adults who are almost 40 (omg did I just admit that again lol), but it is ME and I wouldn't want to be "normal" because those adults seem so boring and stressed and too wrapped up in that "adult" life and not able to be a child sometimes. I am happy with exactly who I am. These kids can be successful and have friends (I even do, just not many) and I KNOW that each and every one of these children are so precious and unique and we actually have learned to embrace that in our boys. They may not be rocket scientists (or even any type of scientist lol) but dang it...they will be B. and J. and precious in their own ways. In a message dated 10/26/2010 8:24:40 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, lmoorhead4@... writes: Hi all. I don't post much but read daily. I wanted to echo 's post to Kristie that she is an example of how we all hope our Aspie kids will turn out. All of you adult aspie's on this list are an inspiration to us because you give us hope that if we can just keep on plugging our children really do have a good chance of being well-adjusted adults. Yes, we all have times when we are completely exhausted and just want to give up. I felt that way this weekend but after reading this morning I am hopeful again. I try and look at my daughter with the attitude of "not less, just different". And thank God we are all different! She makes us laugh with her quirkiness on a daily basis and as her psychiatrist tells me, as she gets older most of the time aspies find a group of friends who are able to tolerate differences better and eventually do have a group of long term friends. So thanks to you all and keep on plugging! in AL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 26, 2010 Report Share Posted October 26, 2010 LOL I like that. In a message dated 10/26/2010 2:04:08 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, s_hansen34@... writes: I have a sign on my laundry room door that says: "Normal in this house is just a setting on the dryer". Having raised two kids already, one ADD boy and one ADHD girl, having ADD/depression myself and my husband with ADD now raising our Asperger's son...well let's just say life has been interesting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 26, 2010 Report Share Posted October 26, 2010 Very well said ! You go Kristie! I have a sign on my laundry room door that says: " Normal in this house is just a setting on the dryer " . Having raised two kids already, one ADD boy and one ADHD girl, having ADD/depression myself and my husband with ADD now raising our Asperger's son...well let's just say life has been interesting. ne > From: kristieannesmama@... <kristieannesmama@...> > Subject: Re: ( ) Adult Aspies > > Date: Tuesday, October 26, 2010, 9:03 AM > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >  > > > > > > > > > > > > > Aw heck...I am blushing here. >  > I agree. That was very well-said! >  > Heh...sometimes I don't even feel that > well-adjusted lol! I guess that just > comes with the territory, though, and it is tolerable most > days. It really was a > long road to where I am now and a LOT of hard work, > changing some behaviors and > a lot of looking inside myself to say I may be a little > " different " from > " normal " adults who are almost 40 (omg did I just > admit that again lol), but it > is ME and I wouldn't want to be " normal " > because those adults seem so boring and > stressed and too wrapped up in that " adult " life > and not able to be a > child sometimes. I am happy with exactly who I am. > These kids can be > successful and have friends (I even do, just not many) and > I KNOW that each and > every one of these children are so precious and unique and > we actually have > learned to embrace that in our boys. They may not be rocket > scientists (or even > any type of scientist lol) but dang it...they will be B. > and J. and precious in > their own ways. >  > > In a message dated 10/26/2010 8:24:40 A.M. Eastern > Daylight Time, > lmoorhead4@... writes: >  > > Hi all. I don't post much but read daily. I wanted > to echo 's post to > Kristie that she is an example of how we all hope our > Aspie kids will turn > out. All of you adult aspie's on this list are an > inspiration to us because > you give us hope that if we can just keep on plugging our > children really do > have a good chance of being well-adjusted adults. Yes, we > all have times when > we are completely exhausted and just want to give up. I > felt that way this > weekend but after reading this morning I am hopeful > again. I try and look at > my daughter with the attitude of " not less, just > different " . And thank God we > are all different! She makes us laugh with her quirkiness > on a daily basis and > as her psychiatrist tells me, as she gets older most of > the time aspies find a > group of friends who are able to tolerate differences > better and eventually do > have a group of long term friends. So thanks to you all > and keep on > plugging! > > in AL > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 27, 2010 Report Share Posted October 27, 2010 Whoooo that is a dilly of a pickle. Our oldest is in middle school too, but she has no issues developmentally and she is VERY mature and responsible for an 11 year old! That being said, we hadn't had any issues at all with her changing classes, etc. because she adjusted so well. Now, when our 8 year old gets to middle school, I am going to be in the same position you are! I KNOW that B. won't be able to handle the class changes, remembering books, and being totally prepared for classes because he is struggling with that now...and he is only in 3rd Grade! He has forgotten his planner SO many times this year already that I had to make a plan with the teacher to make SURE he has it every day. He has had many many lunch detentions already because he would forget his planner and not have done his homework for that day, and I can't tell what he has for homework if I can't see it in his planner! Now the teacher has a website where I can go and check what he has every week for homework (she lists all assignments for that week) and as I said she makes sure he has his planner. I so feel for you sweetie because "there for the grace of God and 3 more years, go I" as they say. For the organization part (remembering books and all assignments), maybe can he write things down that he will need every class of every day? I know that changing clsses is HARD to get used to and your son probably feels a lot out of control and lost and just scared because that is how I felt. It is actually so nice to be Aspie because I can relate to a lot of what our boys and your son is going through. I am more than willing to help anyone who needs advice on anything (even "silly" stuff that has nothing to do with anything lol) and I am honored that I have been accepted so well here. I feel at home, comfortable, and just love "listening" to all of you discuss the different issues that these bright but so misunderstood children have. I don't really know how he could h andle the changing of classes better. Is there a teacher he really trusts that he can ask for help or someone in any of his classes that he trusts? I know trust is a BIG issue sometimes, especially when you are feeling so little in such a big world. We have an outside agency to help our boys with issues like this, so we can be more prepared. I just IMed with my hubby (yes, he is downstairs and I am upstairs and we IM with each other lol) and told him what you'd written and he said the same thing as I am. I am afraid for our now-8 year old to go into middle school exactly for this reason...but I have a feeling that your son will be okay once he gets to his comfort-zone. I wish I could help more! In a message dated 10/27/2010 10:48:01 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, kristenwallen@... writes: Your post was an inspiration to me, hope that someday my son will live a happy life.I do have a question for you if you don't mind...What advice would you give for a brand new middle schooler to feel more comfortable. Middle school has turned our house upside down. The emotions, anger and frustration is constant. My son has an IEP and goes to resource for math and english but the changing classes, hallway craziness, keeping track of 7 classes etc. is causing him to shut down in class (do absolutely nothing work wise) then blowing up like a little pressure cooker once he gets home. I would love to hear from your perspective any ideas I could impliment to calm my son.Thank you!!! >> Aw heck...I am blushing here.> > I agree. That was very well-said!> > Heh...sometimes I don't even feel that well-adjusted lol! I guess that just > comes with the territory, though, and it is tolerable most days. It really > was a long road to where I am now and a LOT of hard work, changing some > behaviors and a lot of looking inside myself to say I may be a little > "different" from "normal" adults who are almost 40 (omg did I just admit that > again lol), but it is ME and I wouldn't want to be "normal" because those > adults seem so boring and stressed and too wrapped up in that "adult" life and > not able to be a child sometimes. I am happy with exactly who I am. > These kids can be successful and have friends (I even do, just not many) and > I KNOW that each and every one of these children are so precious and unique > and we actually have learned to embrace that in our boys. They may not be > rocket scientists (or even any type of scientist lol) but dang it...they > will be B. and J. and precious in their own ways.> > > In a message dated 10/26/2010 8:24:40 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, > lmoorhead4@... writes:> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 27, 2010 Report Share Posted October 27, 2010 Your post was an inspiration to me, hope that someday my son will live a happy life. I do have a question for you if you don't mind... What advice would you give for a brand new middle schooler to feel more comfortable. Middle school has turned our house upside down. The emotions, anger and frustration is constant. My son has an IEP and goes to resource for math and english but the changing classes, hallway craziness, keeping track of 7 classes etc. is causing him to shut down in class (do absolutely nothing work wise) then blowing up like a little pressure cooker once he gets home. I would love to hear from your perspective any ideas I could impliment to calm my son. Thank you!!! > > Aw heck...I am blushing here. > > I agree. That was very well-said! > > Heh...sometimes I don't even feel that well-adjusted lol! I guess that just > comes with the territory, though, and it is tolerable most days. It really > was a long road to where I am now and a LOT of hard work, changing some > behaviors and a lot of looking inside myself to say I may be a little > " different " from " normal " adults who are almost 40 (omg did I just admit that > again lol), but it is ME and I wouldn't want to be " normal " because those > adults seem so boring and stressed and too wrapped up in that " adult " life and > not able to be a child sometimes. I am happy with exactly who I am. > These kids can be successful and have friends (I even do, just not many) and > I KNOW that each and every one of these children are so precious and unique > and we actually have learned to embrace that in our boys. They may not be > rocket scientists (or even any type of scientist lol) but dang it...they > will be B. and J. and precious in their own ways. > > > In a message dated 10/26/2010 8:24:40 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, > lmoorhead4@... writes: > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 27, 2010 Report Share Posted October 27, 2010 My daughter just started middle school and some of the things they did to help her was simple. Like letting her leave class five minutes earlier to avoid the business of the hallway. Something we did at home to help out with keeping the classes sorted out was a binder. They don't have lockers, which I am VERY happy about, so she keeps most of her stuff with her. So I clean out her backpack every night so it's not crammed full of junk paper. Mom to my 4 girls Madeline, Cayla, Arabella, & Vincenza "You are the TRIP I did not take You are the PEARLS I cannot buy You are the blue Italian LAKE YOU are my piece of foreign SKY" ---Anne ---- Re: ( ) Adult Aspies Your post was an inspiration to me, hope that someday my son will live a happy life. I do have a question for you if you don't mind... What advice would you give for a brand new middle schooler to feel more comfortable. Middle school has turned our house upside down. The emotions, anger and frustration is constant. My son has an IEP and goes to resource for math and english but the changing classes, hallway craziness, keeping track of 7 classes etc. is causing him to shut down in class (do absolutely nothing work wise) then blowing up like a little pressure cooker once he gets home. I would love to hear from your perspective any ideas I could impliment to calm my son. Thank you!!! > > Aw heck...I am blushing here. > > I agree. That was very well-said! > > Heh...sometimes I don't even feel that well-adjusted lol! I guess that just > comes with the territory, though, and it is tolerable most days. It really > was a long road to where I am now and a LOT of hard work, changing some > behaviors and a lot of looking inside myself to say I may be a little > "different" from "normal" adults who are almost 40 (omg did I just admit that > again lol), but it is ME and I wouldn't want to be "normal" because those > adults seem so boring and stressed and too wrapped up in that "adult" life and > not able to be a child sometimes. I am happy with exactly who I am. > These kids can be successful and have friends (I even do, just not many) and > I KNOW that each and every one of these children are so precious and unique > and we actually have learned to embrace that in our boys. They may not be > rocket scientists (or even any type of scientist lol) but dang it...they > will be B. and J. and precious in their own ways. > > > In a message dated 10/26/2010 8:24:40 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, > lmoorhead4@... writes: > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 27, 2010 Report Share Posted October 27, 2010 , Maybe you could ask the IEP team to allow your son to transition from class to class after the late bell so he is not in the hallways when it is so crowded. This is what we had to do for our son. Also, an extra set of text books, one for school and one set for home, that is one less thing he would have to remember to bring back and forth. Also, maybe they can give him a "chill pass". It could be anything, an index card or whatever, but it would be something he could use to go to a place designated in the school for him to take a chill break. My son has his "calm places". He can either go to the school psych or asst principle office to get a sensory break when he feels himself getting overloaded. I'm not sure this would work but it might help. It helps our son. ne From: <kristenwallen@...>Subject: Re: ( ) Adult Aspies Date: Wednesday, October 27, 2010, 9:44 AM Your post was an inspiration to me, hope that someday my son will live a happy life.I do have a question for you if you don't mind...What advice would you give for a brand new middle schooler to feel more comfortable. Middle school has turned our house upside down. The emotions, anger and frustration is constant. My son has an IEP and goes to resource for math and english but the changing classes, hallway craziness, keeping track of 7 classes etc. is causing him to shut down in class (do absolutely nothing work wise) then blowing up like a little pressure cooker once he gets home. I would love to hear from your perspective any ideas I could impliment to calm my son.Thank you!!! >> Aw heck...I am blushing here.> > I agree. That was very well-said!> > Heh...sometimes I don't even feel that well-adjusted lol! I guess that just > comes with the territory, though, and it is tolerable most days. It really > was a long road to where I am now and a LOT of hard work, changing some > behaviors and a lot of looking inside myself to say I may be a little > "different" from "normal" adults who are almost 40 (omg did I just admit that > again lol), but it is ME and I wouldn't want to be "normal" because those > adults seem so boring and stressed and too wrapped up in that "adult" life and > not able to be a child sometimes. I am happy with exactly who I am. > These kids can be successful and have friends (I even do, just not many) and > I KNOW that each and every one of these children are so precious and unique > and we actually have learned to embrace that in our boys. They may not be > rocket scientists (or even any type of scientist lol) but dang it...they > will be B. and J. and precious in their own ways.> > > In a message dated 10/26/2010 8:24:40 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, > lmoorhead4@... writes:> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 27, 2010 Report Share Posted October 27, 2010 I am a (fairly) normal adult around the 40 age bracket. I don't think I'm all that boring really. People are all so different that I would say it's not that accurate to state that we are all boring, stressed and unable to reach our inner child. Some can, some can't. All people are different, whether they have AS or not. Roxanna "I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Jefferson Re: ( ) Adult Aspies Aw heck...I am blushing here. I agree. That was very well-said! Heh...sometimes I don't even feel that well-adjusted lol! I guess that just comes with the territory, though, and it is tolerable most days. It really was a long road to where I am now and a LOT of hard work, changing some behaviors and a lot of looking inside myself to say I may be a little "different" from "normal" adults who are almost 40 (omg did I just admit that again lol), but it is ME and I wouldn't want to be "normal" because those adults seem so boring and stressed and too wrapped up in that "adult" life and not able to be a child sometimes. I am happy with exactly who I am. These kids can be successful and have friends (I even do, just not many) and I KNOW that each and every one of these children are so precious and unique and we actually have learned to embrace that in our boys. They may not be rocket scientists (or even any type of scientist lol) but dang it...they will be B. and J. and precious in their own ways. In a message dated 10/26/2010 8:24:40 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, lmoorhead4@... writes: Hi all. I don't post much but read daily. I wanted to echo 's post to Kristie that she is an example of how we all hope our Aspie kids will turn out. All of you adult aspie's on this list are an inspiration to us because you give us hope that if we can just keep on plugging our children really do have a good chance of being well-adjusted adults. Yes, we all have times when we are completely exhausted and just want to give up. I felt that way this weekend but after reading this morning I am hopeful again. I try and look at my daughter with the attitude of "not less, just different". And thank God we are all different! She makes us laugh with her quirkiness on a daily basis and as her psychiatrist tells me, as she gets older most of the time aspies find a group of friends who are able to tolerate differences better and eventually do have a group of long term friends. So thanks to you all and keep on plugging! in AL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 28, 2010 Report Share Posted October 28, 2010 WOW! They are all great ideas! I am so glad your son gets sensory breaks! That must help him immensely! The extra textbooks is a wonderful idea too and so is letting your son go out a teeny bit before everyone so it isn't so confusing. Kudos to his school...it sounds like they are really in the ball and helping him. In a message dated 10/27/2010 10:47:58 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, s_hansen34@... writes: , Maybe you could ask the IEP team to allow your son to transition from class to class after the late bell so he is not in the hallways when it is so crowded. This is what we had to do for our son. Also, an extra set of text books, one for school and one set for home, that is one less thing he would have to remember to bring back and forth. Also, maybe they can give him a "chill pass". It could be anything, an index card or whatever, but it would be something he could use to go to a place designated in the school for him to take a chill break. My son has his "calm places". He can either go to the school psych or asst principle office to get a sensory break when he feels himself getting overloaded. I'm not sure this would work but it might help. It helps our son. ne From: <kristenwallen@...>Subject: Re: ( ) Adult Aspies Date: Wednesday, October 27, 2010, 9:44 AM Your post was an inspiration to me, hope that someday my son will live a happy life.I do have a question for you if you don't mind...What advice would you give for a brand new middle schooler to feel more comfortable. Middle school has turned our house upside down. The emotions, anger and frustration is constant. My son has an IEP and goes to resource for math and english but the changing classes, hallway craziness, keeping track of 7 classes etc. is causing him to shut down in class (do absolutely nothing work wise) then blowing up like a little pressure cooker once he gets home. I would love to hear from your perspective any ideas I could impliment to calm my son.Thank you!!! >> Aw heck...I am blushing here.> > I agree. That was very well-said!> > Heh...sometimes I don't even feel that well-adjusted lol! I guess that just > comes with the territory, though, and it is tolerable most days. It really > was a long road to where I am now and a LOT of hard work, changing some > behaviors and a lot of looking inside myself to say I may be a little > "different" from "normal" adults who are almost 40 (omg did I just admit that > again lol), but it is ME and I wouldn't want to be "normal" because those > adults seem so boring and stressed and too wrapped up in that "adult" life and > not able to be a child sometimes. I am happy with exactly who I am. > These kids can be successful and have friends (I even do, just not many) and > I KNOW that each and every one of these children are so precious and unique > and we actually have learned to embrace that in our boys. They may not be > rocket scientists (or even any type of scientist lol) but dang it...they > will be B. and J. and precious in their own ways.> > > In a message dated 10/26/2010 8:24:40 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, > lmoorhead4@... writes:> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 28, 2010 Report Share Posted October 28, 2010 TO be clear I was NOT calling anyone boring! All I was saying is that some "normal" (in QUOTES) adults can't see the world the way we do! Some can, some can't and some "normal" adults are VERY child-like too. I was talking generalities so do NOT take my comments out of context. If you have never been Aspie then you don't know our world. It is a lot different than everyone else's (read: "normal" again in quotes) world. I am not going to argue this point. I am finished. In a message dated 10/27/2010 10:53:31 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, MadIdeas@... writes: I am a (fairly) normal adult around the 40 age bracket. I don't think I'm all that boring really. People are all so different that I would say it's not that accurate to state that we are all boring, stressed and unable to reach our inner child. Some can, some can't. All people are different, whether they have AS or not. Roxanna"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Jefferson Re: ( ) Adult Aspies Aw heck...I am blushing here. I agree. That was very well-said! Heh...sometimes I don't even feel that well-adjusted lol! I guess that just comes with the territory, though, and it is tolerable most days. It really was a long road to where I am now and a LOT of hard work, changing some behaviors and a lot of looking inside myself to say I may be a little "different" from "normal" adults who are almost 40 (omg did I just admit that again lol), but it is ME and I wouldn't want to be "normal" because those adults seem so boring and stressed and too wrapped up in that "adult" life and not able to be a child sometimes. I am happy with exactly who I am. These kids can be successful and have friends (I even do, just not many) and I KNOW that each and every one of these children are so precious and unique and we actually have learned to embrace that in our boys. They may not be rocket scientists (or even any type of scientist lol) but dang it...they will be B. and J. and precious in their own ways. In a message dated 10/26/2010 8:24:40 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, lmoorhead4@... writes: Hi all. I don't post much but read daily. I wanted to echo 's post to Kristie that she is an example of how we all hope our Aspie kids will turn out. All of you adult aspie's on this list are an inspiration to us because you give us hope that if we can just keep on plugging our children really do have a good chance of being well-adjusted adults. Yes, we all have times when we are completely exhausted and just want to give up. I felt that way this weekend but after reading this morning I am hopeful again. I try and look at my daughter with the attitude of "not less, just different". And thank God we are all different! She makes us laugh with her quirkiness on a daily basis and as her psychiatrist tells me, as she gets older most of the time aspies find a group of friends who are able to tolerate differences better and eventually do have a group of long term friends. So thanks to you all and keep on plugging! in AL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 28, 2010 Report Share Posted October 28, 2010 I didn't take your comments out of context. Read what you wrote again. << I wouldn't want to be "normal" because those adults seem so boring and stressed and too wrapped up in that "adult" life and not able to be a child sometimes. :>> You can re-read what comes before or after as well - it's all there below for your convenience. Not "some" adults, not "a few adults." So I think I got the point and I don't like classifying people like me as boring, stressed and too wrapped up in our "adult" life. Sometimes adults are wrapped up in their adult lives because they have to deal with life. But even then, it doesn't mean one can't tap their inner child when it matters or is necessary. There are a heck of a lot of people out here. If you see people standing around waiting to pick up their kids, it's pretty odd to assume they are all one way and further, that it's a bad way to be. We all have things to deal with in life. You wouldn't know. Everyone is different. And not every "normal" adult thinks they are normal either. Normal is an average and not a person. Some people have doubts, don't fit in, have to deal with mental illness, death, bills, grocery lists, and on and on. I mean, you just never know what is happening for that person standing there waiting to pick up their kid from school. So I think it's unfair to classify a group of people that way. I wouldn't like it if someone said, "All autistic people are...." either unless you were discussing the primary symptoms. I don't think it's accurate. As for me not "knowing" your world, I live here too. You say that without knowing anything about me which is again, the problem. I've been living in autism land my whole life. You aren't the only person who knows how it works and how to understand it. A lot of people can provide insight into this vary large topic of HFA/AS. You can give your own POV about how you think or feel, but people with AS/HFA are all different as well and they do not all see things your way. Roxanna "I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Jefferson Re: ( ) Adult Aspies Aw heck...I am blushing here. I agree. That was very well-said! Heh...sometimes I don't even feel that well-adjusted lol! I guess that just comes with the territory, though, and it is tolerable most days. It really was a long road to where I am now and a LOT of hard work, changing some behaviors and a lot of looking inside myself to say I may be a little "different" from "normal" adults who are almost 40 (omg did I just admit that again lol), but it is ME and I wouldn't want to be "normal" because those adults seem so boring and stressed and too wrapped up in that "adult" life and not able to be a child sometimes. I am happy with exactly who I am. These kids can be successful and have friends (I even do, just not many) and I KNOW that each and every one of these children are so precious and unique and we actually have learned to embrace that in our boys. They may not be rocket scientists (or even any type of scientist lol) but dang it...they will be B. and J. and precious in their own ways. In a message dated 10/26/2010 8:24:40 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, lmoorhead4@... writes: Hi all. I don't post much but read daily. I wanted to echo 's post to Kristie that she is an example of how we all hope our Aspie kids will turn out. All of you adult aspie's on this list are an inspiration to us because you give us hope that if we can just keep on plugging our children really do have a good chance of being well-adjusted adults. Yes, we all have times when we are completely exhausted and just want to give up. I felt that way this weekend but after reading this morning I am hopeful again. I try and look at my daughter with the attitude of "not less, just different". And thank God we are all different! She makes us laugh with her quirkiness on a daily basis and as her psychiatrist tells me, as she gets older most of the time aspies find a group of friends who are able to tolerate differences better and eventually do have a group of long term friends. So thanks to you all and keep on plugging! in AL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 28, 2010 Report Share Posted October 28, 2010 Unfortunately these weren't the school's ideas, they were mine. I'm working (ever so slowly) on my degree in psychology, and have on my own studied everything I can about Aspergers and accommodation/therapies etc that have proven to work. Of course not everything works for every AS child, but they were my suggestions and the school agreed. I know my child best and I make sure they are aware of that. Again, unfortunately this in and of itself didn't address the main issues and just recently I asked and received a "change of placement" for my son to another school in a Behavior Support Class. And the challenges are still ongoing.....ne From: <kristenwallen@...>Subject: Re: ( ) Adult Aspies Date: Wednesday, October 27, 2010, 9:44 AM Your post was an inspiration to me, hope that someday my son will live a happy life.I do have a question for you if you don't mind...What advice would you give for a brand new middle schooler to feel more comfortable. Middle school has turned our house upside down. The emotions, anger and frustration is constant. My son has an IEP and goes to resource for math and english but the changing classes, hallway craziness, keeping track of 7 classes etc. is causing him to shut down in class (do absolutely nothing work wise) then blowing up like a little pressure cooker once he gets home. I would love to hear from your perspective any ideas I could impliment to calm my son.Thank you!!! >> Aw heck...I am blushing here.> > I agree. That was very well-said!> > Heh...sometimes I don't even feel that well-adjusted lol! I guess that just > comes with the territory, though, and it is tolerable most days. It really > was a long road to where I am now and a LOT of hard work, changing some > behaviors and a lot of looking inside myself to say I may be a little > "different" from "normal" adults who are almost 40 (omg did I just admit that > again lol), but it is ME and I wouldn't want to be "normal" because those > adults seem so boring and stressed and too wrapped up in that "adult" life and > not able to be a child sometimes. I am happy with exactly who I am. > These kids can be successful and have friends (I even do, just not many) and > I KNOW that each and every one of these children are so precious and unique > and we actually have learned to embrace that in our boys. They may not be > rocket scientists (or even any type of scientist lol) but dang it...they > will be B. and J. and precious in their own ways.> > > In a message dated 10/26/2010 8:24:40 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, > lmoorhead4@... writes:> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.