reply to jennifer

[Guest guest]

Hello to everyone,

I've been reading your posts for a few months and have been helped by hearing of

your trials, tribulations, and some successes, too...thank you.

I just read this message from jennifer and just wanted to say I understand your

feelings. It's heartbreaking to share a close relationship with your child and

then have that change to one where the child seems to hate you. I am

experiencing this too. It's very hard, and of course so much of a worry, to

have a child withdraw. I grieve over the " loss " of this child....I miss my kid

so much....... Yes, he's still alive and there is so much to be thankful for,

but it is also so hard that he rejects most contact with me.

I still try very hard to provide things that he needs to develop and grow into

an adult, but it is a lonely journey, sometimes.

So , and others, who quietly read these posts for encouragement, you are

not alone. I understand very well the pain, loneliness, concern, etc....

thanks for the messages you have sent that have helped me,

janet

From: " " < >

Sent: Tue, October 20, 2009 5:44:05 AM

Subject: ( ) Digest Number 11115

A support list for parents of children with Asperger's Syndrome or HFA.

Messages In This Digest (1 Message)

1.1.

Re: How do ya'll deal....? From: Lorraine son

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1.1.

Re: How do ya'll deal....?

Posted by: " Lorraine son " lorrainedavidson12@...

lorrainedavidson12

Tue Oct 20, 2009 2:26 am (PDT)

Laughing is what its all about, best medicine in the world.

From: Chambers <missjen0124>

Subject: Re: ( ) How do ya'll deal....?

Date: Monday, 19 October, 2009, 12:41

I don't walk on eggshells anymore with my son, it's more of he wishes I did, and

that's why he's always angry. NOTHING is ever his fault, everything is someone

else. He pushed my cart in the store yesterday because I told him that I wasn't

getting him something, and I said, " Ok, you're definitely not getting this

today, because you almost made me knock over a whole shelf of food " and he said

" well it was your fault for yelling at me! " granted, yelling at him requires me

to speak above a whisper!

From: rushen janice <jrushen (DOT) com>

Sent: Sun, October 18, 2009 5:21:21 PM

Subject: Re: ( ) How do ya'll deal....?

,

You are not alone...my son treats us terribly. ... both my husband and I. If I

tell him to do something... he says he will...but never does. So when I ask him

again...he screams at me.

As for homework...he wants nothing to do with it. He will take an F. He

doesn't care. I have to help with him with everything.. .

His anger is horrible.... when he comes home from school I don't talk to him for

an hour ...I wait for him to talk to me. I believe he has ODD too! He is always

angry especially with us.

What to do ...I am not sure...nothing has really worked for us...I keep telling

my husband to do nothing for him. One time I was so angry ....I wanted to smash

his Xbox but didn't. I would like to take it away. But, I get no backing from my

husband. Plus he doesn't have many friends...

But I hear you....I truly do. And, when he was young...I did what your mother

is doing ...I spoiled him. I stopped but we have a long ways to go.

jan

<font face= " arial black " color= " #bf00bf " >Janice Rushen</font>

<font face= " Arial Black " color= " #bf00bf " ></font> & nbsp;

<em><font face= " Arial Black " color= " #7f007f " > " I will try to be open to all

avenues of wisdom and hope " </font> </em>

From: Chambers <missjen0124>

Aspergers Treatment < >

Sent: Sun, October 18, 2009 3:06:42 PM

Subject: ( ) How do ya'll deal....?

I was just wondering how many parents have the problem of their children being

just completely HATEFUL to them. I swear, I think my son really hates me when

he says he hates me. He was diagnosed with ODD a year ago, before he was dx'd

with ASD, but ODD doesn't even come close to how I feel he acts. Something as

small as, " nicolas, please get down from there " if we're in the store, and he

climbs on the racks. and he screams " you never let me do anything, because you

hate me " ...that is just one example of about a million. And it happens all day

everyday. " No, you can't have a toy, you haven't earned the points for one this

time " (he earns points throughout the day, and so many points equal different

privleges) he says " oh yes I will " and if I say no to that, he starts to push me

or hit me.

Is my child displaying typical behaviors of an Aspie? He only became like this

recently (like the last month) and it has escalated even more since I've been

staying with my mom (temporarily) , because he gets EVERYTHING he wants from

her, because she thinks that everything he does should be excused because he has

a " disability " . I'm pretty patient with my son, but it gets to the point where

he talks down to me so much, I just ignore him while he bashes me, because if I

speak to him, I'll get even more upset.

I love my son so much, and fight for him daily, while I watch him treat me

like dirt. I feel like there's nothing I can do to make him happy with me,

unless it's obey his every command. I asked what he wanted to do for his george

washington project, and he said " nothing, you're going to do it for me " . I

didn't even know what to say to that. We used to be best friends, and no matter

how he acted at school, he was my little buddy. Now, I don't even want to be

around him sometimes. I hope I'm not the only one who is going through this.. I

definitely need help!

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