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When someone gives parenting advice I will also say thank you, etc.

If they keep on then I will often ask them if they wish to watch my son for me for a day while I go shopping. LOL

It will stop any further adviceTheresa StoopsCoordinator OfFlorida FASD Interagency Action Group 850-408-3789

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love that- I usually invite them ( mm and child) over for a play date or offer to meet somewhere so our kids can play together

From: Theresa S. <houndlover2@...> Sent: Fri, April 1, 2011 9:58:29 AMSubject: Re: ( ) parenting advice.

When someone gives parenting advice I will also say thank you, etc.

If they keep on then I will often ask them if they wish to watch my son for me for a day while I go shopping. LOL

It will stop any further adviceTheresa StoopsCoordinator OfFlorida FASD Interagency Action Group 850-408-3789

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I guess it depends on who gives the advice and how it is given. If it's another

mom who has a kid on the spectrum I would listen and then take what I thought

would help and ignore the rest. But we're pretty good at giving each other

advice appropriately. My mom and MIL generally don't give advice, just help.

So they're fantastic. Strangers who are clearly trying to be kind I just let it

go. Anyone who acts rudely should look out because if my hormones are making me

crazy I will probably be pretty blunt. One woman at a BJs Warehouse store

caught me at a bad moment. I was pregnant with my daughter so VERY hormonal.

didn't have a dx yet but it was clear he had some obsessions and he was

often difficult to deal with. So this woman who was handing out food

samples...oh yeah, she has that job so clearly she's highly qualified to give me

advice...saw standing in the shopping cart and screaming. I was trying to

get food samples to try to distract him from wanting the trampoline that was

tied to the very very high up ceiling. It was a HUGE thing. Anyway, she saw

this and said, " If you let him do that now he'll do that to you the rest of your

life! " Something in me snapped then. All I wanted was a stinkin' package of

diapers! I yelled, " This is NONE of your G-D BUSINESS so SHUT YOUR MOUTH! "

This seemed to startle her and she backed away with many apologies. It made me

laugh to think of it later. It still makes me laugh. The best thing is that

for some reason me ranting at a stranger distracted enough that the next

thing I knew he was playing with some legos he'd gotten at Mcs! He was

happy as can be for the rest of the time we were there even through the check

out line! I was tempted to thank her for her foolishness.

There have been times when I've let other people give it a try for a while.

HAH! I assure you the person who thought they knew better always suffered the

most. So if it's a safe situation I'll say, " Why don't you give it a try. " I

don't really need to do that now. is 14 and huge. If he starts freaking

out people get out of the way. Mostly he doesn't,though.

Miriam

>

>

>

> When someone gives parenting advice I will also say thank you, etc.

>

> If they keep on then I will often ask them if they wish to watch my son for me

for a day while I go shopping. LOL

>

> It will stop any further advice

>

> Theresa Stoops

> Coordinator Of

> Flo rida FASD Interagency Action Group

> 850-408-3789

>

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hahahahaha! That is a great response! So perfect! I love it!

I just got some " parenting advice " from my sons OT and Speech therapists at his

school. They are in their 20's, not married, no children of their own. And

they are telling me how to discipline, etc. my son. As if I hadn't thought of

that. As if all his issues are all my fault and if I would just try harder I

would have a perfect child! " Because he is not ever defiant in our sessions! "

blah blah blah!

ARRRRRGH! So frustrating! I just nodded & said " ummmmm " a lot and really bit

my tongue!

>

>

>

> When someone gives parenting advice I will also say thank you, etc.

>

> If they keep on then I will often ask them if they wish to watch my son for me

for a day while I go shopping. LOL

>

> It will stop any further advice

>

> Theresa Stoops

> Coordinator Of

> Flo rida FASD Interagency Action Group

> 850-408-3789

>

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I think those are the ones I have the hardest time with. I am not new to parenting advice and normally I shrug it off with a smile. But we just got back from a great cruise and the kids were at my mom's house. According to my mom, Madeline was an ANGEL and she thinks it's not autism..it's just her "growing up". Madeline's BCBA is very nice, a great young lady, but I think she needs a little more experience under her belt. My sister in law is the same thing. Nice young lady...but her idea of parenting is different than mine. Doing this day in..day out...24/7 is exhausting at times..

Mom to my 4 girls

Madeline, Cayla, Arabella, & Vincenza

"You are the TRIP I did not take

You are the PEARLS I cannot buy

You are the blue Italian LAKE

YOU are my piece of foreign SKY"

---Anne ----

Re: ( ) parenting advice.

hahahahaha! That is a great response! So perfect! I love it!

I just got some "parenting advice" from my sons OT and Speech therapists at his school. They are in their 20's, not married, no children of their own. And they are telling me how to discipline, etc. my son. As if I hadn't thought of that. As if all his issues are all my fault and if I would just try harder I would have a perfect child! "Because he is not ever defiant in our sessions!" blah blah blah!

ARRRRRGH! So frustrating! I just nodded & said "ummmmm" a lot and really bit my tongue!

>

>

>

> When someone gives parenting advice I will also say thank you, etc.

>

> If they keep on then I will often ask them if they wish to watch my son for me for a day while I go shopping. LOL

>

> It will stop any further advice

>

> Theresa Stoops

> Coordinator Of

> Flo rida FASD Interagency Action Group

> 850-408-3789

>

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I had to stop going to a private OT because of that. After a few sessions we were just talking about how it's my daughters 1 yr birthday soon. She started giving advice about making sure my son knows that is my daughters birthday,not his. She was telling me to be very firm and to make sure we don't buy him any presents etc. etc. etc. I felt that it was beyond her services that she should be providing to us. Also she said all this in front of my son who felt like he had done something wrong already and he hadn't. We hadn't yet even had a family talk about it yet or prepared him for how it would be. So he at that point started looking at her birthday as a negative thing. He's actually very sweet with his sister and hasn't acted jelous as of yet.

We all need to surround ourselves with positive, supportive, helpful people. The other kind is way too stressful when you add them all up. If you can't seperate yourselves from a criticizing family (most cannot) than at least remove or replace the others! : ) Simplify your lives!

Re: ( ) parenting advice.

hahahahaha! That is a great response! So perfect! I love it!I just got some "parenting advice" from my sons OT and Speech therapists at his school. They are in their 20's, not married, no children of their own. And they are telling me how to discipline, etc. my son. As if I hadn't thought of that. As if all his issues are all my fault and if I would just try harder I would have a perfect child! "Because he is not ever defiant in our sessions!" blah blah blah! ARRRRRGH! So frustrating! I just nodded & said "ummmmm" a lot and really bit my tongue! >> > > When someone gives parenting advice I will also say thank you, etc. > > If they keep on then I will often ask them if they wish to watch my son for me for a day while I go shopping. LOL > > It will stop any further advice > > Theresa Stoops > Coordinator Of > Flo rida FASD Interagency Action Group > 850-408-3789>

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