Re: looking for help for 20 year old

[Guest guest]

You may want to contact your local Office of Rehabilitative Services or Vocational Rehab. They can sometimes provide a driving evaluation and lessons. Also, in some cases they can provide job/work preparation and training/shadowing. Pam Huge Savings on Popular Laptops only at Dell.com. Shop Now!

[Guest guest]

Hi, we have a son 25, and I know how you might feel outnumbered on here, but

remember you have been thru it and can contribute with you hard won wisdom!

Driving has been a nightmare. DS is officially ADD so that impacts his attention

on driving. He had several small fenderbenders, all when his meds had either not

taken effect or worn off, enough to have license suspended, thank goodness no

injuries.

But, where we live you HAVE to have transporation to work. A couple of tips:

Some of the driving schools in our area offer special instruction to " special

needs " might be someone older, or kids with ADD. They get more road time, more

evaluation, that might make you feel better about driving. Also, he had a really

hard time with written test on computer at DMV. In TN you have a lot to just

memorize and then if you don't pass you have to wait a full week, so of course

he had lost all of it. But, if you ask, similar to the secret words to get

services on IEP, they will read the test outloud and that made a huge

difference, he passed.

We are currently immersed in the job interview thing. DS just graduated from Job

Corps in Culinary Arts and has been trying to get job. One thing we have done is

applied for some even when I didn't think there was a chance to give him

interview practice. And sure enough, at the last interview, she asked him " what

do you do when you get angry? " He had no idea how to answer! One great thing

about JobCorps is that he has a Career Transition person he works with here on

interviewing skills and has a practice session set up for this Monday. Is there

somewhere, a temp agency, career training, voc rehab that might do that with

your son? One of DS biggest problems is not looking people in the eye and that

is just deadly in an interview, so we're working on that.

I have no problem telling him exactly what to wear, LOL! Actually, I took him to

the Goodwill where they had a huge selection of stuff, cheap to expensively

made, and found it a great way to show him quality of construction like in a

blazer or jacket and pants. What to look for, how to see if it fits. He really

has no sense about color, etc. so everything we bought will work together.

I am relentless in coaching, pushing, modeling him because there is always that

little voice in the back of my head that if I don't do it, who will? Not him...

and I want him to be able to live completely independently, not with us forever!

But, this is all relative to your son's personality. Our son loves to be

directed, he doesn't mind at all and never as a baby said, " no let me do it. "

And I, as the perfect co-enabler parent, have done it for better or worse.

Good luck, good to have some parents of " olders " aboard.

Sue in Tn

>

> Hello Everyone,

> I read so much about people with younger children and I relate to what they

are saying.

> But we found out late what the problem was and are now trying to catch up.

> Does anyone find it hard to get their child to drive? Do you get nervous when

they are on the road?

> How do you work job interviews? And helping them with selection of wardrobe

with insulting them since they are adults?

> Any help or suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks

>

[Guest guest]

Hi

My son is 18 yrs. old. He doesn't drive yet (wasn't ready).

I think we are going to start soon.

He works right now at a career/vocational rehab program.

He will only be there for the rest of the summer and then we are hoping to enroll

him in college. But we are also going to try to get transportation through

the Dept.of developmental disabilities if needed.

I'm from New Jersey, and they also have the DVRS (dept. of vocational rehab. services).

They help with training for jobs and help place them too.

I hope this helps.

By the way, where are you from?

Sharon

From: mariepauline629 <jeanmarie629@...>Subject: ( ) looking for help for 20 year old Date: Wednesday, June 24, 2009, 7:54 AM

Hello Everyone,I read so much about people with younger children and I relate to what they are saying.But we found out late what the problem was and are now trying to catch up.Does anyone find it hard to get their child to drive? Do you get nervous when they are on the road?How do you work job interviews? And helping them with selection of wardrobe with insulting them since they are adults? Any help or suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks

[Guest guest]

My son is 19, he wants his license real bad, but he's not ready. And I told him I can not turn his loose until I know he is safe. We try to drive every day, sometimes my nerves get pretty bad. lol But he did better today. I want him to be safe for himself and others. I don't know if he will ever get to drive by himself, but I'm not ready to give up on him yet.He just graduated in May from High School, he needs something todo, he's bored a lot. So others with older kiddos, please keep in touch and offer some good advice or stories, would much be appreciated. And I'll do the same. pjFrom: mariepauline629

<jeanmarie629@...>Subject: ( ) looking for help for 20 year old Date: Wednesday, June 24, 2009, 6:54 AM

Hello Everyone,

I read so much about people with younger children and I relate to what they are saying.

But we found out late what the problem was and are now trying to catch up.

Does anyone find it hard to get their child to drive? Do you get nervous when they are on the road?

How do you work job interviews? And helping them with selection of wardrobe with insulting them since they are adults?

Any help or suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks