Re: young teen girl feeling left out

[Guest guest]

Maybe you can introduce her to some popular books, movies, etc. Like get her the Twilight books or rent the movies to watch with her. Also, you could take her to a concert of someone popular if they come to town. My husband loaded my son n's ipod with some popular rock music and plays it in the car too. He found some songs he really likes and relates to the lyrics. So maybe you can find something like this for your daughter.Many girls love animals, maybe you could turn her interest into something more common like volunteering at a shelter together or walking a neighbor's dog.Just some ideas, hope it helps.SuzanneSent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®From: "Pamela" <susanonderko@...>Sender: Date: Mon, 03 Jan 2011 02:58:14 -0000< >Reply Subject: ( ) young teen girl feeling left out What kind of teen girl things can I do with my daughter to helpher develop more age appropriate interests. My daughter's interests still are very focusedand obsessional on areas that are not typical for girls her age.Her best friend for the last few years has been her cousin. Buther cousin has moved on to an interest in texting on her phone andtalking about popular music. And my daughter takes some interestbut not to the same extent. And there is just too much excitementon my daughter's part on parts of things that no teen girl would careabout. Such as collecting certain pokeman cards or excessiveinterest in setting up the same fish tank over and over.My daughter is so sad and depressed about her loneliness.When she has a play time with a younger cousin theyplay board games, and play on the swings etc. But I can'tsustain setting up play with younger kids they have thereown friends from there grade. Any ideas on things I can do 1:1 with my daughter to helpher develop some more age appriopriate activities?She is not the least bit athletic. Pam

[Guest guest]

My son was on the pokemon cards for years, actually all things pokemon...it was

just last yr he started to let it go a little...lucky for us he did start to

think about wanting friends for the first time ever...he is 13 yrs old..I don't

think he would ever of come around socially if it wasn't for starting to have an

interest in girls..they came first, then he did start to have a friend or two..I

about fell over the first time he asked for someone to spend the night..so right

now we are trying to get him to understand what it means to be a good

friend...he never thinks about what they want to do or if they need a blanket or

something to drink...but he has made steps which makes me so happy..I used to

ache for him and think what is his school years without friends...there was a

point where I thought he would never have them...but something that him and I do

one on one that has helped him transition over is talk, look and shop for

clothes for him...when he first started to become aware of things like this I

talked to him about what style he liked and what he wanted to look like..maybe

you could do this as well, show her how to properly put on a little makeup, take

her to a cosmetic counter and let them do a makeover (a lot of them will do this

for free), have a daughter mom mani pedi...another thing she might like is

making jewelry together, she can organize the stuff and set up her station, yet

also be creative..maybe you guys could hold a photo shoot, another thing I do

with my son, with different outfits and situations and then help her upload them

to the computer & help her make a Facebook acct..I know how it feels to just

want them not to miss out on the best yrs, to think back on your own BFF and

want that for your child..maybe if she starts to come around you could plan a

small slumber party and invite her cousin as a sort of buffer, but help them

come up with activities to do so she has a chance to observe the other girls

interactions..hope some of this gives you some ideas...keep us posted

>

> Maybe you can introduce her to some popular books, movies, etc. Like get her

the Twilight books or rent the movies to watch with her. Also, you could take

her to a concert of someone popular if they come to town. My husband loaded my

son n's ipod with some popular rock music and plays it in the car too. He

found some songs he really likes and relates to the lyrics. So maybe you can

find something like this for your daughter.

> Many girls love animals, maybe you could turn her interest into something more

common like volunteering at a shelter together or walking a neighbor's dog.

> Just some ideas, hope it helps.

>

> Suzanne

> Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®

>

> ( ) young teen girl feeling left out

>

> What kind of teen girl things can I do with my daughter to help

> her develop more age appropriate interests.

>

> My daughter's interests still are very focused

> and obsessional on areas that are not typical for girls her age.

> Her best friend for the last few years has been her cousin. But

> her cousin has moved on to an interest in texting on her phone and

> talking about popular music. And my daughter takes some interest

> but not to the same extent. And there is just too much excitement

> on my daughter's part on parts of things that no teen girl would care

> about. Such as collecting certain pokeman cards or excessive

> interest in setting up the same fish tank over and over.

>

> My daughter is so sad and depressed about her loneliness.

> When she has a play time with a younger cousin they

> play board games, and play on the swings etc. But I can't

> sustain setting up play with younger kids they have there

> own friends from there grade.

>

> Any ideas on things I can do 1:1 with my daughter to help

> her develop some more age appriopriate activities?

>

> She is not the least bit athletic.

> Pam

>

[Guest guest]

Maybe instead of trying to shape her interests, you can show her that it's okay

to be interested in the things she likes, and try to help her find others who

like the same things. Maybe take her to the local fish/aquarium supply store

and see if they need an intern or know of other teens who are into fish. Or see

if you can find a local Pokemon collectors group -- some of the game stores run

clubs like that.

As the mom of a 15 year old Aspie daughter, I've had much more luck working WITH

her interests than against them. And I have come to realize that helping her

feel good about who she is, whatever she is interested in, will help her

self-esteem and be the biggest part about how she relates to others.

Diane

>

> ( ) young teen girl feeling left out

>

> What kind of teen girl things can I do with my daughter to help

> her develop more age appropriate interests.

>

> My daughter's interests still are very focused

> and obsessional on areas that are not typical for girls her age.

> Her best friend for the last few years has been her cousin. But

> her cousin has moved on to an interest in texting on her phone and

> talking about popular music. And my daughter takes some interest

> but not to the same extent. And there is just too much excitement

> on my daughter's part on parts of things that no teen girl would care

> about. Such as collecting certain pokeman cards or excessive

> interest in setting up the same fish tank over and over.

>

> My daughter is so sad and depressed about her loneliness.

> When she has a play time with a younger cousin they

> play board games, and play on the swings etc. But I can't

> sustain setting up play with younger kids they have there

> own friends from there grade.

>

> Any ideas on things I can do 1:1 with my daughter to help

> her develop some more age appriopriate activities?

>

> She is not the least bit athletic.

> Pam

>