Re: School's attitude - Roxanna

[Guest guest]

Thank you again for your info to give to

the school. I was acumilating it for court someday, but never gave it to

them as you suggested in your last response.

My son is just almost 6, I am wondering

how they will accept “his” versions or my observations. You

really seem to have this all down pat! How old is your child, when did

you get him diagnosed, by what type of Dr and how long have you been advocating

for your child?

Denel

From: [mailto: ] On Behalf Of Roxanna

Sent: Tuesday, October 26, 2010

9:05 AM

Subject: Re: ( )

School's attitude

One important thing to remember is that

you can accumulate data as well as anyone else. When the school says

things are great at school and you know this is not true, you can and should

document what is going on. Dates, times, episodes, events, comments,

etc. All of this accumulates to paint a larger picture. Then when

the school staff say, " He's doing great " or " we never see that

problem " - you can whip out your data and say, " Well, on this date,

this happened...then on this day, we dealt with this.... " and so on.

Roxanna

" I predict future happiness for

Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the

people under the pretense of taking care of them. " - Jefferson

-----Original

Message-----

From: Blessed Mom <blessedmom1305@...>

Sent: Fri, Oct 22, 2010 12:21 pm

Subject: RE: ( ) School's attitude

I'm just new to the group and noticed this

string so I am going to follow it. I feel for you with the school

issue. For us the same thing, the school is throwing it all back in my

lap since he " does well at school " (which is a lie becvause I have

witnessed MANY things) anyways. I just wanted to sympathize with you and

give you some support. So many of us deal with this.

Denel

mom to 5 year old Zachary who carries a

menu of diagnoses =(

From:

[mailto: ]

On Behalf Of Roxanna

Sent: Thursday, October 21, 2010

10:18 PM

Subject: Re: ( )

School's attitude

The school is

really throwing the problem back into your lap. They should provide more

social skill help. The ST or school counselor should be giving him social

skill help over a variety of situations and environments on a regular basis

according to his needs. It is their problem. It's everyone's

problem. They are required to provide this kind of help to him.

The purpose of the IDEA is: <<(d)(1)(A) to ensure that all children with disabilities have

available to them a free appropriate public education that emphasizes special

education and related services designed to meet their unique needs and prepare

them for further education, employment and independent living.>>

Note the last part where it discusses preparing him for further education,

employment and independent living.

Roxanna

" I predict future happiness for

Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the

people under the pretense of taking care of them. " - Jefferson

-----Original

Message-----

From: Catcelia <c2cats@...>

Sent: Tue, Oct 19, 2010 2:27 pm

Subject: ( ) School's attitude

I just

came from a team meeting and need to vent. The school did an FBA on my son and

this meeting was to review it. The first thing that was said that most of the

behaviors observed were no longer an issue. Nothing like an out of date report

to base your child's plan - SIGH. It was a long meeting. The short of it is

that my son needs more social skills work. (DUH) They only provide him one

opportunity per week. The psychologist said that my son needs it 5x/wk Then the

school staff proceeded to tell me how it was my issue and not theirs. That I

should make it my number one priority. (I felt like slapping the woman who said

this.) And since there is no local help then I should be willing to travel to

get this help for my son. When I asked how they expected my son to handle a lot

of travel on a week day when he has so much homework (he stresses if he can't

finish). Not to mention my son already has a lot of afterschool appointments

related to his health issues and the fact that although I have flexibility in

my schedule I do work full time. I also pointed out that having social skills

groups with strangers that he'll probably never see again hasn't helped in the

past and that he really needed more social opportunities within school. Once I

said this then they started thinking of other opportunities that they could

work out. So far there is an informal lunch group (one that had been

discontinued but started back up despite the counselor's wish). I'm hoping that

they come up with some suggestions because the outside group during the school

year is just not an option because it puts too much stress on my son.

Thanks for letting me vent. Overall this is a good school district but

sometimes....SIGH.

Caroline

[Guest guest]

Hi Denel,

How well the staff will accept your version or your data is up in the air

really. They might argue with you or accept what you say. They might put you

down as if you don't know what you are talking about. I've had a lot of variety

in responses. But no matter, have your data and use it anyway.

I find that it is helpful always to think before hand, " What will they say

against this? " and then I plan replies to their excuses or denials or whatever.

This helps me back up my case. And I find that their excuses or put downs are

very predictable. In other words, it's not hard to predict what they will say

to any particular problem being discussed.

Have a good idea of what you hope to accomplish as well. Have the information

you need to advocate for what you want. That helps! I bring notes to meetings

outlining the main points I want to make. I jot down what they are probably

going to say to argue against providing what I am asking for. Then i make notes

to counter that argument. It might seem like a lot of effort...and it is

sometimes. But being prepared is how I like to handle things. So it works for

me.

I have two kids with HFA. One is going to turn 22 yo in just a week or so. The

other is 14 yo. So I have been advocating for a very long time, now that I put

the numbers down there. lol.

My oldest was assessed by a team at Children's hospital in St. Louis, MO many

years ago. The head person was a child psychiatrist. We also dealt with a

developmental ped. then - that was his regular doctor for years. Our younger ds

was evaluated at a different Children's hospital (we had moved to Ohio by then)

and he was dx'd by a dev. pediatrician. He was also seen by other professions -

a neurologist and a psychologist specializing in autism - who all agreed with

the dx.

Roxanna

>

> Thank you again for your info to give to the school. I was acumilating it

> for court someday, but never gave it to them as you suggested in your last

> response.

>

>

>

> My son is just almost 6, I am wondering how they will accept " his " versions

> or my observations. You really seem to have this all down pat! How old is

> your child, when did you get him diagnosed, by what type of Dr and how long

> have you been advocating for your child?

>

>

>

> Denel

>

>

>

> _____

>

> From:

> [mailto: ] On Behalf Of Roxanna

> Sent: Tuesday, October 26, 2010 9:05 AM

>

> Subject: Re: ( ) School's attitude

>

>

>

>

>

> One important thing to remember is that you can accumulate data as well as

> anyone else. When the school says things are great at school and you know

> this is not true, you can and should document what is going on. Dates,

> times, episodes, events, comments, etc. All of this accumulates to paint a

> larger picture. Then when the school staff say, " He's doing great " or " we

> never see that problem " - you can whip out your data and say, " Well, on this

> date, this happened...then on this day, we dealt with this.... " and so on.

>

>

>

>

>

>

> Roxanna

> " I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government

> from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of

> them. " - Jefferson

>

>

>

>

>

> ( ) School's attitude

>

>

>

> I just came from a team meeting and need to vent. The school did an FBA on

> my son and this meeting was to review it. The first thing that was said that

> most of the behaviors observed were no longer an issue. Nothing like an out

> of date report to base your child's plan - SIGH. It was a long meeting. The

> short of it is that my son needs more social skills work. (DUH) They only

> provide him one opportunity per week. The psychologist said that my son

> needs it 5x/wk Then the school staff proceeded to tell me how it was my

> issue and not theirs. That I should make it my number one priority. (I felt

> like slapping the woman who said this.) And since there is no local help

> then I should be willing to travel to get this help for my son. When I asked

> how they expected my son to handle a lot of travel on a week day when he has

> so much homework (he stresses if he can't finish). Not to mention my son

> already has a lot of afterschool appointments related to his health issues

> and the fact that although I have flexibility in my schedule I do work full

> time. I also pointed out that having social skills groups with strangers

> that he'll probably never see again hasn't helped in the past and that he

> really needed more social opportunities within school. Once I said this then

> they started thinking of other opportunities that they could work out. So

> far there is an informal lunch group (one that had been discontinued but

> started back up despite the counselor's wish). I'm hoping that they come up

> with some suggestions because the outside group during the school year is

> just not an option because it puts too much stress on my son.

>

> Thanks for letting me vent. Overall this is a good school district but

> sometimes....SIGH.

>

> Caroline

>