Re: [SPAM] Re: [SPAM] Re: Adult Aspies

[Guest guest]



In our community 85% of the moms work outside of the home, so a search close to the middle school started an after school program for the kids. After a few years a program through the Y sponsored by our city, went into the middle schools and set the program up,it is like you said a study hall type thing, held in our school cafeteria, then a parent can either pick them up or a school bus drops them off at the nearest "city bus" stop and they pick and choose which one is nearest their home.

Maybe call the churchs near the school where son will go and ask them if they have any idea what is available near there. You might be surprised that there is already something small in place that you just haven't heard about yet.

Lynne Bankswww.americanadoptioncongress.orgSouth Dakota State Representative

www.adoptionscams.netAsk me how to protect yourself from being scammed in adoption!

[sPAM] Re: ( ) Adult Aspies

Whoooo that is a dilly of a pickle. Our oldest is in middle school too, but she has no issues developmentally and she is VERY mature and responsible for an 11 year old! That being said, we hadn't had any issues at all with her changing classes, etc. because she adjusted so well. Now, when our 8 year old gets to middle school, I am going to be in the same position you are! I KNOW that B. won't be able to handle the class changes, remembering books, and being totally prepared for classes because he is struggling with that now...and he is only in 3rd Grade! He has forgotten his planner SO many times this year already that I had to make a plan with the teacher to make SURE he has it every day. He has had many many lunch detentions already because he would forget his planner and not have done his homework for that day, and I can't tell what he has for homework if I can't see it in his planner! Now the teacher has a website where I can go and check what he has every week for homework (she lists all assignments for that week) and as I said she makes sure he has his planner.

I so feel for you sweetie because "there for the grace of God and 3 more years, go I" as they say. For the organization part (remembering books and all assignments), maybe can he write things down that he will need every class of every day? I know that changing clsses is HARD to get used to and your son probably feels a lot out of control and lost and just scared because that is how I felt. It is actually so nice to be Aspie because I can relate to a lot of what our boys and your son is going through. I am more than willing to help anyone who needs advice on anything (even "silly" stuff that has nothing to do with anything lol) and I am honored that I have been accepted so well here. I feel at home, comfortable, and just love "listening" to all of you discuss the different issues that these bright but so misunderstood children have. I don't really know how he could h andle the changing of classes better. Is there a teacher he really trusts that he can ask for help or someone in any of his classes that he trusts? I know trust is a BIG issue sometimes, especially when you are feeling so little in such a big world. We have an outside agency to help our boys with issues like this, so we can be more prepared. I just IMed with my hubby (yes, he is downstairs and I am upstairs and we IM with each other lol) and told him what you'd written and he said the same thing as I am. I am afraid for our now-8 year old to go into middle school exactly for this reason...but I have a feeling that your son will be okay once he gets to his comfort-zone. I wish I could help more!

In a message dated 10/27/2010 10:48:01 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, kristenwallen@... writes:

Your post was an inspiration to me, hope that someday my son will live a happy life.I do have a question for you if you don't mind...What advice would you give for a brand new middle schooler to feel more comfortable. Middle school has turned our house upside down. The emotions, anger and frustration is constant. My son has an IEP and goes to resource for math and english but the changing classes, hallway craziness, keeping track of 7 classes etc. is causing him to shut down in class (do absolutely nothing work wise) then blowing up like a little pressure cooker once he gets home. I would love to hear from your perspective any ideas I could impliment to calm my son.Thank you!!! >> Aw heck...I am blushing here.> > I agree. That was very well-said!> > Heh...sometimes I don't even feel that well-adjusted lol! I guess that just > comes with the territory, though, and it is tolerable most days. It really > was a long road to where I am now and a LOT of hard work, changing some > behaviors and a lot of looking inside myself to say I may be a little > "different" from "normal" adults who are almost 40 (omg did I just admit that > again lol), but it is ME and I wouldn't want to be "normal" because those > adults seem so boring and stressed and too wrapped up in that "adult" life and > not able to be a child sometimes. I am happy with exactly who I am. > These kids can be successful and have friends (I even do, just not many) and > I KNOW that each and every one of these children are so precious and unique > and we actually have learned to embrace that in our boys. They may not be > rocket scientists (or even any type of scientist lol) but dang it...they > will be B. and J. and precious in their own ways.> > > In a message dated 10/26/2010 8:24:40 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, > lmoorhead4@... writes:>

[Guest guest]

Our schools here, (Elementary and Jr High) have a "Homework Club" after school. Kids are allowed to stay to just finish their work, get help - if needed, or HAVE to stay if their homework wasn't completed for that day.

Maybe you could get something started there? Good luck. Hugs.

Robin

PEOPLE MAY NOT REMEMBER EXACTLY

WHAT YOU DID OR WHAT YOU SAID,

BUT THEY WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER

HOW YOU MADE THEM FEEL

From: Lynne Banks <lbanks8928@...>Subject: Re: [sPAM] Re: ( ) Adult Aspies Date: Thursday, October 28, 2010, 6:49 AM

 Suzanne, I worried so much over the summer about sending our dd off to middle school. We had one child go through this school already so I was aware of how middle school worked. So what I did was contacted the directors office of our school district and asked them what they had available for our dd. Then I set up a meeting with the middle school principle and counselor about two weeks before school started. Because of my call to the district office I found out about the "check and connect" program, so I also asked for that teacher to be in on our meeting. This meeting gave me the opportunity to introduce our dd and us to them and help them understand how they could best meet her needs. Then once we had her schedule, I wrote up one big email and sent it to all of her teachers. Oh and one of her classes is a social building class,,which she loves. She had a couple of little struggles starting out

but now she has done extremely well. We have never had a decent school year yet, this seems it is going to be the first one so far. I keep wondering if I can let my breath out yet,,sure you understand what I mean by that.

Lynne Bankswww.americanadoptioncongress.orgSouth Dakota State Representative

www.adoptionscams.netAsk me how to protect yourself from being scammed in adoption!

[sPAM] Re: ( ) Adult Aspies

Whoooo that is a dilly of a pickle. Our oldest is in middle school too, but she has no issues developmentally and she is VERY mature and responsible for an 11 year old! That being said, we hadn't had any issues at all with her changing classes, etc. because she adjusted so well. Now, when our 8 year old gets to middle school, I am going to be in the same position you are! I KNOW that B. won't be able to handle the class changes, remembering books, and being totally prepared for classes because he is struggling with that now...and he is only in 3rd Grade! He has forgotten his planner SO many times this year already that I had to make a plan with the teacher to make SURE he has it every day. He has had many many lunch detentions already because he would forget his planner and not have done his homework for that day, and I can't tell what he has for homework if I can't see it in his planner! Now the teacher has a website where I can go and check

what he has every week for homework (she lists all assignments for that week) and as I said she makes sure he has his planner.

I so feel for you sweetie because "there for the grace of God and 3 more years, go I" as they say. For the organization part (remembering books and all assignments), maybe can he write things down that he will need every class of every day? I know that changing clsses is HARD to get used to and your son probably feels a lot out of control and lost and just scared because that is how I felt. It is actually so nice to be Aspie because I can relate to a lot of what our boys and your son is going through. I am more than willing to help anyone who needs advice on anything (even "silly" stuff that has nothing to do with anything lol) and I am honored that I have been accepted so well here. I feel at home, comfortable, and just love "listening" to all of you discuss the different issues that these bright but so misunderstood children have. I don't really know how he could h andle the changing of classes better. Is there a teacher he really trusts that he

can ask for help or someone in any of his classes that he trusts? I know trust is a BIG issue sometimes, especially when you are feeling so little in such a big world. We have an outside agency to help our boys with issues like this, so we can be more prepared. I just IMed with my hubby (yes, he is downstairs and I am upstairs and we IM with each other lol) and told him what you'd written and he said the same thing as I am. I am afraid for our now-8 year old to go into middle school exactly for this reason...but I have a feeling that your son will be okay once he gets to his comfort-zone. I wish I could help more!

In a message dated 10/27/2010 10:48:01 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, kristenwallen@... writes:

Your post was an inspiration to me, hope that someday my son will live a happy life.I do have a question for you if you don't mind...What advice would you give for a brand new middle schooler to feel more comfortable. Middle school has turned our house upside down. The emotions, anger and frustration is constant. My son has an IEP and goes to resource for math and english but the changing classes, hallway craziness, keeping track of 7 classes etc. is causing him to shut down in class (do absolutely nothing work wise) then blowing up like a little pressure cooker once he gets home. I would love to hear from your perspective any ideas I could impliment to calm my son.Thank you!!! >> Aw heck...I am blushing here.> > I agree. That was very well-said!> > Heh...sometimes I don't even feel that well-adjusted lol! I guess that just > comes with the territory, though, and it is tolerable most days. It really > was a long road to where I am now and a LOT of hard work, changing some > behaviors and a lot of looking inside myself to say I may be a little > "different" from "normal" adults who are almost 40 (omg did I just admit that > again lol), but it is ME and I wouldn't want to be "normal" because those > adults seem so boring and stressed and too wrapped up in that "adult" life and > not able to be a child sometimes. I am happy with exactly who I am. > These kids can be successful and have friends (I even do, just not many) and > I KNOW that each and every one of these children are so precious and unique > and

we actually have learned to embrace that in our boys. They may not be > rocket scientists (or even any type of scientist lol) but dang it...they > will be B. and J. and precious in their own ways.> > > In a message dated 10/26/2010 8:24:40 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, > lmoorhead4@... writes:>