Re: New here, new to Asperger's (Amber)

[Guest guest]

Hi, Don't feel alone:) As there is so many parents with the same DX:) I have come to find this group really imformative. There is some really great advice on here. My son is 4 years old and sounds so much like your little one. WIth the nightmares we always talk about something really happy before going to sleep and pray of course. We also started Melatonin to help sleep habits. This doesn't work for all kids, but it does help ours. Some say it makes dreaming worse. My little guy seems to tolerate it well. As for meltdowns we started using Autism Pecs. Even though he can talk doesnt mean he can communicate well. We use schedules for mourning, evening and night. There is alot of social stories on Ebay that I found useful. I found making up our own puppet shows and talking about things that would cause him to have a meltdown. Made into a story and what

the correct response would be versus a meltdown. This helped calmly express better. Also do u do anything for sensory? We do joint compressions and an inside trampoline, kinda a sensory diet. Getting started with that is complicated at times. First figuring out what he needed. ( calming activity or a get up and go activity) This comes really in handy when in different situations.( grocery stores, birthday parties) I always carry a suprise toy or which he is interested in case he is overwhelmed and needs a calm down moment. I keep a special box full of figet toys and let him pick out a couple to take with places. Sometimes I think figuring out what is irritating them so much can help calm them. I figured out not only working on sensory and communication, but improving sleep issues. He is also allergic to his clothes that we didn't even know about. Allergy testing helped fiugure that one out. Now he wears only cotton clothes and how much this helped

his mood. We also got him a body sock to play in when he wants his alone time. We do rewards for good behavoir like those colored bath drops if he has done good behavoir all day or at least worked hard at following the rules. In your case maybe get those plastic bugs for a dollar store and let her put them in here bath water to play with if good behavior has been worked on through out the day. We also use a chart to show good behavoir bad behavoir. Smiles for good, frowns for bad. Every child is different, but thought I would share some things we do to see if they would help. Even after all this we still have our draining days. Each one of our children are very special and deserve all the help and love. Take care:) Faith, Love, Hope while on your journey of autism:)

From: Sherry Burford <aspiemomone@...>Subject: Re: ( ) New here, new to Asperger's Date: Monday, June 22, 2009, 7:09 AM

welcome and sorry to hear you are having such a tough, i know many of us can relate to the exhaustion and the not knowing what to do about the meltdowns, my son is 11 and was dx with asperger's in 2007 and then more recently with epilepsy, so yes i relate to the challenges of having a child who is different in every sense of the word, not the same challenges as you but like they say you meet one child with autism, you've met one child with autism, you may find that there are others who are going thru exactly what you are and then others like myself who understand the heartache of watching your child not fit in or not interacting with other children, and other symptoms of AS i dont have alot of great advice as i am so new to this but there are alot of other parents who are here have been doing this for long time they have wonderful advice and completely understand as most have already been there done that, lol so stay with the group even if you think

you dont have much to give , there is so much support, love , encouragement and they will give you strength to keep pushing to keep going, again welcome and good luck to your family hang in there, we are here for you and your family ready with an open heart and ear and willing to listen and help anyway we can huge hugs to your entire family. sherry in Pa

From: Amber <amber_norton27> Sent: Monday, June 22, 2009 2:32:51 AMSubject: ( ) New here, new to Asperger's

Hello, I am so happy I found this group. My 3 1/2 year old daughter was just diagnosed with Asperger's. We feel so alone! We have always known she is different, and she has always been a very challenging child. She was diagnosed back in March with Anxiety, OCD, Selective Mutism, and a Sleep Disorder. She also saw an OT for Sensory Processing Disorder. When we went back for our follow-up appointment this past week, the diagnosis was changed to Asperger Syndrome. My dh and I feel that it is an appropriate diagnosis.Our daughter has been very challenging with her behavior. We are constantly walking on egg shells around her, as she seems to constantly be having meltdowns. She is very defiant, and wants to be in charge. If things don't go her way, she explodes and takes hours to calm down. I stay home with her and my 1 year old, and I am exhausted. Her social skills are definitely lacking. She does not have any interest interacting with

children her own age. She fights with them, or flat out tells them she doesn't want to play. She does have a couple friends, but they are all several years older, and she doesn't really do real interactive play with them, more or less just follows them around and observes. She spends most of her day outside hunting for bugs. She has no fear of spiders or bees, and tantrums when I refuse to pick them up for her. She loves animals of all kinds and always has from what I can remember. When she was just 15 months old and we were at a petting zoo, she went around giving all the goats kisses! She is also very into transportation. Cars, trains, buses, cranes, planes, etc. all really interest her.She is a very bright child. She had a very large vocabulary early on (50+ words at a year) and is constantly saying things that amaze us. She has an amazing memory, she does not forget anything. I think that pretty much sums her up. We are

awaiting help. Our Early Intervention is closed for summer break (until July 6), so we are trying to be patient! We are having a real challenge with her right now, as she is constantly in meltdown, and constantly crying or screaming at us. She has also started having night terrors which makes her already challenging sleep behavior even more difficult to deal with.I'm looking forward to connecting with other parents dealing with this. It's so hard having a different child...especially when other people just don't get it.Amber

[Guest guest]

Welcome Amber...i must say you really seem to have your act together. That is so good. I wished I had known all this stuff when my son was 4. I never found out till he started 6th grade. My son is very fussy with his clothes...he can put his socks on 20 times....they have to be just right...i tell him...just turn them ...oh no...he has to pull them all the way off and start over.

You are doing some great things with your child...wish I could but with him being 13 1/2 and going on 19...he thinks they are too babyish...or as he would say "gay". Everything these days is "gay". All the boys talk like this and he copies....His other favorite word now is Epic....it is so Epic...You are so Epic...This was Epic...omg...

Keep posting...you are doing a GREAT job!

Jan

Janice Rushen

"I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope"

From: Sherry Burford <aspiemomone>Subject: Re: ( ) New here, new to Asperger's Date: Monday, June 22, 2009, 7:09 AM

welcome and sorry to hear you are having such a tough, i know many of us can relate to the exhaustion and the not knowing what to do about the meltdowns, my son is 11 and was dx with asperger's in 2007 and then more recently with epilepsy, so yes i relate to the challenges of having a child who is different in every sense of the word, not the same challenges as you but like they say you meet one child with autism, you've met one child with autism, you may find that there are others who are going thru exactly what you are and then others like myself who understand the heartache of watching your child not fit in or not interacting with other children, and other symptoms of AS i dont have alot of great advice as i am so new to this but there are alot of other parents who are here have been doing this for long time they have wonderful advice and completely understand as most have already been there done that, lol so stay with the group even if you think

you dont have much to give , there is so much support, love , encouragement and they will give you strength to keep pushing to keep going, again welcome and good luck to your family hang in there, we are here for you and your family ready with an open heart and ear and willing to listen and help anyway we can huge hugs to your entire family. sherry in Pa

From: Amber <amber_norton27> Sent: Monday, June 22, 2009 2:32:51 AMSubject: ( ) New here, new to Asperger's

Hello, I am so happy I found this group. My 3 1/2 year old daughter was just diagnosed with Asperger's. We feel so alone! We have always known she is different, and she has always been a very challenging child. She was diagnosed back in March with Anxiety, OCD, Selective Mutism, and a Sleep Disorder. She also saw an OT for Sensory Processing Disorder. When we went back for our follow-up appointment this past week, the diagnosis was changed to Asperger Syndrome. My dh and I feel that it is an appropriate diagnosis.Our daughter has been very challenging with her behavior. We are constantly walking on egg shells around her, as she seems to constantly be having meltdowns. She is very defiant, and wants to be in charge. If things don't go her way, she explodes and takes hours to calm down. I stay home with her and my 1 year old, and I am exhausted. Her social skills are definitely lacking. She does not have any interest interacting with

children her own age. She fights with them, or flat out tells them she doesn't want to play. She does have a couple friends, but they are all several years older, and she doesn't really do real interactive play with them, more or less just follows them around and observes. She spends most of her day outside hunting for bugs. She has no fear of spiders or bees, and tantrums when I refuse to pick them up for her. She loves animals of all kinds and always has from what I can remember. When she was just 15 months old and we were at a petting zoo, she went around giving all the goats kisses! She is also very into transportation. Cars, trains, buses, cranes, planes, etc. all really interest her.She is a very bright child. She had a very large vocabulary early on (50+ words at a year) and is constantly saying things that amaze us. She has an amazing memory, she does not forget anything. I think that pretty much sums her up. We are

awaiting help. Our Early Intervention is closed for summer break (until July 6), so we are trying to be patient! We are having a real challenge with her right now, as she is constantly in meltdown, and constantly crying or screaming at us. She has also started having night terrors which makes her already challenging sleep behavior even more difficult to deal with.I'm looking forward to connecting with other parents dealing with this. It's so hard having a different child...especially when other people just don't get it.Amber

[Guest guest]

Thank you for your suggestions! We have addressed her sensory issues, in fact,

she went to OT for a while to try to help with them. She has a lot of different

things to play with that help with the sensory stuff. We have a rice table,

trampoline, sand box, wading pool, lots of sensory toys, and I made a body sock

for her (which she loves!). We also tried using visuals for a while, she liked

them the first couple days, then the novelty wore off. I'll have to look into

that idea again. Same with reward charts, it worked for about a month, then she

could care less. Maybe she would be into it again now that she has had a break

though.

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> From: Sherry Burford <aspiemomone@...>

> Subject: Re: ( ) New here, new to Asperger's

>

> Date: Monday, June 22, 2009, 7:09 AM

>

>

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>

>

>

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>

> welcome and sorry to hear you are having such a tough, i know many of us can

relate to the exhaustion and the not knowing what to do about the meltdowns, my

son is 11 and was dx with asperger's in 2007 and then more recently with

epilepsy, so yes i relate to the challenges of having a child who is different

in every sense of the word, not the same challenges as you but like they say you

meet one child with autism, you've met one child with autism, you may find that

there are others who are going thru exactly what you are and then others like

myself who understand the heartache of watching your child not fit in or not

interacting with other children, and other symptoms of AS i dont have alot of

great advice as i am so new to this but there are alot of other parents who are

here have been doing this for long time they have wonderful advice and

completely understand as most have already been there done that, lol so stay

with the group even if you think you

> dont have much to give , there is so much support, love , encouragement and

they will give you strength to keep pushing to keep going, again welcome and

good luck to your family hang in there, we are here for you and your family

ready with an open heart and ear and willing to listen and help anyway we can

huge hugs to your entire family. sherry in Pa

>

>

>

>

>

> From: Amber <amber_norton27>

>

> Sent: Monday, June 22, 2009 2:32:51 AM

> Subject: ( ) New here, new to Asperger's

>

>

>

> Hello, I am so happy I found this group. My 3 1/2 year old daughter was just

diagnosed with Asperger's. We feel so alone! We have always known she is

different, and she has always been a very challenging child. She was diagnosed

back in March with Anxiety, OCD, Selective Mutism, and a Sleep Disorder. She

also saw an OT for Sensory Processing Disorder. When we went back for our

follow-up appointment this past week, the diagnosis was changed to Asperger

Syndrome. My dh and I feel that it is an appropriate diagnosis.

>

> Our daughter has been very challenging with her behavior. We are constantly

walking on egg shells around her, as she seems to constantly be having

meltdowns. She is very defiant, and wants to be in charge. If things don't go

her way, she explodes and takes hours to calm down. I stay home with her and my

1 year old, and I am exhausted.

>

> Her social skills are definitely lacking. She does not have any interest

interacting with children her own age. She fights with them, or flat out tells

them she doesn't want to play. She does have a couple friends, but they are all

several years older, and she doesn't really do real interactive play with them,

more or less just follows them around and observes.

>

> She spends most of her day outside hunting for bugs. She has no fear of

spiders or bees, and tantrums when I refuse to pick them up for her. She loves

animals of all kinds and always has from what I can remember. When she was just

15 months old and we were at a petting zoo, she went around giving all the goats

kisses! She is also very into transportation. Cars, trains, buses, cranes,

planes, etc. all really interest her.

>

> She is a very bright child. She had a very large vocabulary early on (50+

words at a year) and is constantly saying things that amaze us. She has an

amazing memory, she does not forget anything.

>

> I think that pretty much sums her up. We are awaiting help. Our Early

Intervention is closed for summer break (until July 6), so we are trying to be

patient! We are having a real challenge with her right now, as she is constantly

in meltdown, and constantly crying or screaming at us. She has also started

having night terrors which makes her already challenging sleep behavior even

more difficult to deal with.

>

> I'm looking forward to connecting with other parents dealing with this. It's

so hard having a different child...especially when other people just don't get

it.

>

> Amber

>