Re: Tired of always working on something, etc

[Guest guest]

This is exactly it, only read and repeat 7,300 times! DS is 26, still saying a

lot of this same stuff. THAT is what is so wearing that I don't think other

parents " get. " That you do and say the same that they do with their NT kid, BUT

their kid " gets it " after a few repetitions. Great post!

Sue in TN

>

> YES, I feel your pain!! Every day just to get him to brush his teeth, comb his

> hair, get dressed, put on socks and shoes, get backpack. Every single little

> daily routine thing is a huge ordeal. Use a napkin or a tissue instead of the

> wall or other peoples clothes. Put your garbage in the trash can, put your

shoes

> in the closet (everything is just dropped on the floor wherever he happens

> to be). Stop shouting everything, stop hitting your sister, stop ruining

> everything in the house (amazing how they can just not ignore random things

like

> curtains, must destroy them, swing from them, stain them, rip the brackets out

> of the wall, bend the rods...or floor vent covers, msut shove things down

them,

> dent them, remove from the floor and leave them on the floor somewhere else in

> the house). Yes, some days are better and some worse, but really, really

tiring

> after a while. My daughter with Rubinstien -Taybi Syndrome presents a whole

> other set of challenges/issues so I usually just take one to be in charge of

and

> my husband the other so we don't go completely out of our minds! My boy has

been

> telling me lately how he wants to live with us forever and my daughter told me

> that when she has a baby or two then we will need to get a bigger house to fit

> everyone in it. Good grief, I couldn't wait to move out of my parents house,

and

> now mine are threatening never to leave?! I think Blaise will change his mind

as

> time goes on, my daughter may truly need to stay. Well, sorry for the long

vent

> but something I read there got me on a roll!!

> Patty

> and  I have Sheridon 8 RTS and Blaise 6 Spitfire ASD         

>

[Guest guest]

Your day sounds EXACTLY like mine. Every day, every little thing is a gigantic

ordeal and fight. Asking " please brush your teeth " it's as if I'm asking my 13

yo son to perform brain surgery.

I am so tired and every morning after I drop him off at school I am frazzled and

mad and sad that I'll only have peace until I pick him up.

I don't like my son right now, it's really come to that point. I love him and

I'll continue to take care of him, advocate for him and be verbally abused by

him but it doesn't mean I have to like it. I know I sound like a horrible mother

but I've had it, I've broke. I feel like a robot just going through the motions

over and over.

It's been really bad latlely as he's started middle school and if he's not happy

then no ones happy.

I'm sorry to sound so dark but I don't know what else to do, I'm mentally shot.

I have visions of doing this with him when he's forty, dragging him out of bed

to get to his job (at Mcs if it were up to him)

I hate being in this dark place but years of daily battles has weakened me, I

give up.

[Guest guest]

All these posts just make me want to cry.....I totally understand. This kind of

goes along with my post from the other day about disrespectful comments (thank

you all for your wonderful responses...I have not had a chance to respond but

have eagerly read the replies). I know how it feels to be this frustrated and

depressed. I myself get sooooooo sick of screaming at my son!! I try so hard

not to, but he pushes me until I can't take it anymore! Like our trip to the

store today......he absolutely did not want to go to the grocery and he made

that clear from the moment I mentioned it. I am a single Mom and try my best to

go when he is with his Dad, but sometimes...you need to go! We were out of

toilet paper, milk....essential items! It started off with a fit because I

would not let him ride in the " car cart " .....he is almost 9 years old and I am

just now refusing to let him ride in a cart. People look at us strange, but I

have always let him do it to keep the peace! We are at the point where he just

doesn't fit anymore and I can hardly push the cart (he is nearly as big as I

am!!). So, it starts of with a fit before we even actually enter the store! I

get to look like the a crappy mother for every person walking in the busy store!

Then again at the deli because I would not let him get mountain dew (which I

have never allowed by the way, why would I now??) and he is still going on about

that (and has probably found the opportunity to embarrass me in front of the

deli clerk). He just says such nasty things to get to me.

I've been struggling with the way my boyfriend is struggling to " get " my son and

his behavior. Maybe I am expecting the impossible after reading these posts and

knowing my own feelings at times. I love my son so much and hurt for him so

often. It is exhausting feeling all these emotions all the time while trying to

keep it all together. Some days you just can't keep it together anymore!! I

totally feel the same way and while I am glad to know I am not alone, it makes

me so sad that there are other parents feeling this same way......

>

> Your day sounds EXACTLY like mine. Every day, every little thing is a gigantic

ordeal and fight. Asking " please brush your teeth " it's as if I'm asking my 13

yo son to perform brain surgery.

>

> I am so tired and every morning after I drop him off at school I am frazzled

and mad and sad that I'll only have peace until I pick him up.

> I don't like my son right now, it's really come to that point. I love him and

I'll continue to take care of him, advocate for him and be verbally abused by

him but it doesn't mean I have to like it. I know I sound like a horrible mother

but I've had it, I've broke. I feel like a robot just going through the motions

over and over.

>

> It's been really bad latlely as he's started middle school and if he's not

happy then no ones happy.

>

> I'm sorry to sound so dark but I don't know what else to do, I'm mentally

shot.

>

> I have visions of doing this with him when he's forty, dragging him out of bed

to get to his job (at Mcs if it were up to him)

>

> I hate being in this dark place but years of daily battles has weakened me, I

give up.

>

[Guest guest]

I can also relate to what all of you are saying. I have always considered

myself a patient person, more easy going, and have found myself being more on

edge with some of the daily challenges. I am also going through the rules

constantly with my son (he is 12), and we have gone as far as put locks/keys on

a couple bedrooms as he always has to 'sneak' and get in things. Though he is

skinny, he does eat quite a bit, yet he constantly sneaks food and drinks into

his room, tonight it was a large glass of orange juice which ended up on the

floor, and I asked him not to take snacky foods to his room, only to have him

take some in there an hour later.

The teeth thing is something we deal with too, along with the showers, flushing

toilets, washing hands, putting clothes in a hamper, etc. It gets very

stressful! Has anyone found any good solutions?

The child psychologist we take my son to, commented about doing pictures for

various reminders, as there is no reading involved. Of course, I have to figure

out how to do it and when to do it, as there is little time left in the day, and

my husband doesn't do much in that area.

I'm sorry I am rambling, but also want to comment, I am glad I joined this

group, it is great hearing the feedback and some other parent's experiences.

Thanks for listening,

Connie

> > Your day sounds EXACTLY like mine. Every day, every little thing is a

gigantic ordeal and fight. Asking " please brush your teeth " it's as if I'm

asking my 13 yo son to perform brain surgery.

> >

> > I am so tired and every morning after I drop him off at school I am frazzled

and mad and sad that I'll only have peace until I pick him up.

> > I don't like my son right now, it's really come to that point. I love him

and I'll continue to take care of him, advocate for him and be verbally abused

by him but it doesn't mean I have to like it. I know I sound like a horrible

mother but I've had it, I've broke. I feel like a robot just going through the

motions over and over.

> >

> > It's been really bad latlely as he's started middle school and if he's not

happy then no ones happy.

> >

> > I'm sorry to sound so dark but I don't know what else to do, I'm mentally

shot.

> >

> > I have visions of doing this with him when he's forty, dragging him out of

bed to get to his job (at Mcs if it were up to him)

> >

> > I hate being in this dark place but years of daily battles has weakened me,

I give up.

> >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Wow, thanks for the responses on the sneaking, and the advice, it helps

tremendously. I am glad to hear others have this issue as well. I told my son,

every time I see one wrapper on the floor, tucked in couch cushions, etc, I am

going to have him take care of it, hoping, eventually, he will get so tired of

me asking him to pick up after himself.

The sneaking food, is another issue in general, but I really appreciate the

feedback and ideas (and glad to hear I'm not alone). I am going to work on

organizing something for rewards, I am willing to try about anything at this

point, I just have to get the energy, as this has become mentally exhausting, as

I am sure everyone else can relate.

Thanks again!

> > > Your day sounds EXACTLY like mine. Every day, every little thing is a

gigantic ordeal and fight. Asking " please brush your teeth " it's as if I'm

asking my 13 yo son to perform brain surgery.

> > >

> > > I am so tired and every morning after I drop him off at school I am

frazzled and mad and sad that I'll only have peace until I pick him up.

> > > I don't like my son right now, it's really come to that point. I love him

and I'll continue to take care of him, advocate for him and be verbally abused

by him but it doesn't mean I have to like it. I know I sound like a horrible

mother but I've had it, I've broke. I feel like a robot just going through the

motions over and over.

> > >

> > > It's been really bad latlely as he's started middle school and if he's not

happy then no ones happy.

> > >

> > > I'm sorry to sound so dark but I don't know what else to do, I'm mentally

shot.

> > >

> > > I have visions of doing this with him when he's forty, dragging him out of

bed to get to his job (at Mcs if it were up to him)

> > >

> > > I hate being in this dark place but years of daily battles has weakened

me, I give up.

> > >

> > >

> >

>