Guest guest Posted November 21, 2009 Report Share Posted November 21, 2009 I am just wondering if anyone has ideas to help with behavior issues. My 9 yr old wants total control, so I have a hard time getting her to do anything on my time. It must be on her time, and not " boring " . She gets very violent w/ me and her sister, I have plenty of bruises to show for it. If things don't go just so, or if her sis annoys her, she goes crazy. She was diagnosed w/ asperbergers and anxiety disorder, and her psychiatrist wants me to take her to a behavioral specialist, but I do not have insurance for that. i was just wondering if you guys had any charting ideas orbehavior things that work in your home. I have tried some, but no success. Thanks Deb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 21, 2009 Report Share Posted November 21, 2009 A year ago our daughter was being difficult, having huge tantrums and making us totally crazy. Big fights were common. A few things happened to help change that and now she is growing into a very rational and self-controlled young lady. First of all, we started some medication for ADHD, I realize that's not for everyone, but it helped in her case. Also, husband and I read 1 2 3 Magic and put it into practice. REsponding calmly has helped us tremendously. We were flying off the handle and it would make her tantrums worse. That is the main premise in the 1 2 3 Magic book. We also used a lot of positive reinforcement methods like earning poker chips to cash in for TV or video game time or a trip to the store, or to change them in for spending money. That worked for a while and now we just use straight allowance for chores, and time outs or loss of privileges for misbehaving. LOTS of praise for good behavior, good grades, self-calming. Catch 'em being good and talk it up. We had her fill out a home rules contract that I found online somewhere, and just today I was looking back at it and realizing that she stopped doing a lot of the negative things she used to do. The contract came from a website www.teenswithproblems.com. Another helpful site that my son's teacher recommended was " discipline help " http://www.disciplinehelp.com/. We're using the same things with my son, and he's not on any medication yet, so we're not giving the meds all the credit. Hope this may help you! > > I am just wondering if anyone has ideas to help with behavior issues. My 9 yr old wants total control, so I have a hard time getting her to do anything on my time. It must be on her time, and not " boring " . She gets very violent w/ me and her sister, I have plenty of bruises to show for it. If things don't go just so, or if her sis annoys her, she goes crazy. She was diagnosed w/ asperbergers and anxiety disorder, and her psychiatrist wants me to take her to a behavioral specialist, but I do not have insurance for that. i was just wondering if you guys had any charting ideas orbehavior things that work in your home. I have tried some, but no success. Thanks > > Deb > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 22, 2009 Report Share Posted November 22, 2009 Hi! We have a county mental health clinic that has psychiatrists, psychologists, etc. They have a sliding fee for anyone who qualifies depending on the household income. Some families might pay more, some pay nothing. Other professionals have offered lower fees if insurance doesn't cover their services, or if the family qualifies based on income, too. You might want to call around to find the behavior analysts in your area and explain your circumstances. They might be able to make it affordable for you. If not, the 1-2-3 Magic book or the dvd can be found in many libraries, too. I agree with the person who mentioned this book. By counting, it also gives the Asperger child the to count of 3 to 'get prepared' to change their behavior...a good thing for A.S. There are other discipline books out there, but this one has a dvd which can be nice to actually see the method in use. We have an 8-year-old daughter with A.S., too. It's so difficult for these kids. Sometimes the frustration with the whole communication-based problems that arise must reach the point that they lash out. Does she hit other kids or just family? Sometimes kids lash out at the people they feel closest to because they feel safer taking out their aggressions on someone they know they can trust to love them unconditionally---just something to think about. Be sure to reassure her of your unconditional love, in addition to addressing the behavior issues. Take care! --Kari > > I am just wondering if anyone has ideas to help with behavior issues. My 9 yr old wants total control, so I have a hard time getting her to do anything on my time. It must be on her time, and not " boring " . She gets very violent w/ me and her sister, I have plenty of bruises to show for it. If things don't go just so, or if her sis annoys her, she goes crazy. She was diagnosed w/ asperbergers and anxiety disorder, and her psychiatrist wants me to take her to a behavioral specialist, but I do not have insurance for that. i was just wondering if you guys had any charting ideas orbehavior things that work in your home. I have tried some, but no success. Thanks > > Deb > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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