Christmas gift problem

[Guest guest]

My husband and I have hit a situation that only parents of Aspie's can understand and give advice on. If DD was NT, we'd have no trouble making a decision.

Here's the story: Our almost 8-year-old DD recently came across a catalog for Maplea Girls, which is the Canadian equivalent of the American Girl dolls. She saw a dress for one of the dolls that is similar to one she herself has and made up her mind that she absolutely must have the doll and the dress. The doll and her basic kit is $100. The dress is another $24.

The good part is that Kylie, who often doesn't have much concept of the value of money, decided she was going to save up to buy the doll and the dress herself. We determined a maximum amount that she could earn up to each week by doing chores and working on behavior issues. She's been very focused on saving for the doll.

The downside: There is no way she'll have enough money saved for Christmas, which is when she wants the doll because her dress and the doll's dress are Christmas dresses and she wants both of them to wear them Christmas Day. Under normal circumstances we'd explain it's not going to happen and she'll just have to keep saving up. Actually, we did do this and there were tons of tears and disappointment. She has not stopped working to save up, though. She keeps thinking there will be some sort of miracle.

The clincher in all this is that her best friend is getting the exact same doll for Christmas. If Dana gets the doll and Kylie doesn't, we're sure we're in for major drama and meltdowns.

We feel stuck. We're proud of her for wanting to work for something, but we know this is going to get really ugly if she doesn't get the doll before Christmas. She just doesn't understand that at her current allowance rate, it would take a minimum of 8 months to earn enough for everything she wants.

Would you cave and buy the doll as a gift and have her pay for the dress, have her pay us back for everything (realizing once she has it, she won't be work so hard), or just not do anything and ride out the storm?

Thanks!

Cheryl S.