The Nurtured Heart Approach by Glasser and Easley

[Guest guest]

Hi everyone,

My son's psychologist is recommending this for our family and I'm wondering if

any of you have experience with it? We have been working on it for a couple of

weeks now with a glimmer of hope. It is really hard when one of us is home with

both children to consistently enforce the rules and acknowledge all the times

they are behaving as expected. It is not so much " catching them being good " but

just being nuetral and stating that you see them quietly coloring with the blue

crayon, etc. She said that the intense children learn to feed off the negativity

of only getting a reaction when they misbehave. In theory it sounds great for

the children but it is a big change for us parents! I won't give up on my son no

matter how hard it is I just want to know that we are on the right track.

Thanks!

Patty

Mom to Blaise 6, AS and Sheridon 7, RTS

[Guest guest]

Hi! I did work with a therapist on the phone a few years ago

that used the Nutured Heart Approach. I now work with a

therapist from Yale Univerisity's Parent Training and Child

Conduct Clinic. Dr. Kadzin is the director at Yale and

has a program for Oppositional/Ridgid kids.

I think you are on the right track with positive reinforcement.

But there was still things missing in the nutured heart

approach. Yale would agree that you only change behavior

through positive reinforcement. But with AS kids and many

other kids with issues they also need a lot of shaping and

role playing. This is missing in the Nutured Heart Approach.

You can add it though easily.

Yale too uses a point system as NH program does. In the Yale

system my daughter will get points to role play difficult

situations. This has really changed my daughter's behaviors

so much. My daughter is also very anxious kid so the

more I can role play the better with her.

In the Yale program (and the Nutured heart too I think) all rewards

are earned pretty much. This was such a big change for us but

our daughter was so resistent to all daily routines. She

fought me on everything.

So in the Yale program and NH no more lectures. It is all

routine, reward driven. You take your shower at 7pm you

get some TV time earned. No shower no TV. And then praise

all small steps no matter how small and no yelling.

So for us it was a set routine, rewards for following routine,

praise for all positive steps, a point chart reviwed

once or twice a day to review how the child is doing, and

a chance to role play difficult situations for points,

cashing in points for things you may have just bought in the

past (a trip to Mc's for 25 points, a late night on Friday

for 25 points etc), no lectures or arguing we just say we

can't give you points if you are late etc.

I agree this is a lot of work. But I see more progress

than I ever did with having a shaping program.

Pam

- In , " sheridonsmom " <sheridonsmom@...> wrote:

>

> Hi everyone,

>

> My son's psychologist is recommending this for our family and I'm wondering if

any of you have experience with it? We have been working on it for a couple of

weeks now with a glimmer of hope. It is really hard when one of us is home with

both children to consistently enforce the rules and acknowledge all the times

they are behaving as expected. It is not so much " catching them being good " but

just being nuetral and stating that you see them quietly coloring with the blue

crayon, etc. She said that the intense children learn to feed off the negativity

of only getting a reaction when they misbehave. In theory it sounds great for

the children but it is a big change for us parents! I won't give up on my son no

matter how hard it is I just want to know that we are on the right track.

>

> Thanks!

>

> Patty

>

> Mom to Blaise 6, AS and Sheridon 7, RTS

>