Re: my aspie girl does not let me to wash her hair and she looks neglected..

[Guest guest]

Hi,

I have been dealing with my girl hair since she was born. It is very curly and it is hard to keep up with it.

She does not like me to touch her head. I take her to the hair dresser every week, but a have made the decision of strenghten her hair out for easy maintenance. The problem is that she is very sensitive to smell and it will be very difficult.

I am planning to cover her nose with a mask, giver her medicine for nauseas and bring her nintendo ds.

Can somebody give me more suggestion?

How can I make her confortable while the hair dresser do her hair?

( ) Re: Allergy shots??? Yes or no?My husband is an acupuncturist and he has a lot of enthusiastic patients who come to him for allergy relief. He often prescribes herbal remedies for allergies. I don't know what the herbs are, but wanted to confirm that acupuncture can help. For children, my husband usually doesn't use needles, just the gentle application of pressure or heat on the acupuncture points.

[Guest guest]

>

> Can somebody give me more suggestion?

>

> How can I make her confortable while the hair dresser do her hair?

How old is your daughter? How long has she been going to the hair dresser once

a week? Why do you go to the hair dresser once a week? What is the hair

dresser doing--washing her hair? styling her hair? What makes you think

straighter hair will be easier to manage than curly? Straight hair looks just

as unkept when it is dirty and uncombed as curly hair. I'm sorry about all the

questions, but I'm having a hard time understanding the situation. I'm just

asking the questions so maybe I can help.

I have always had the same problem with my son with Asperger, who is now 14yo.

I'm embarrassed to say that I didn't find any good solutions for several years,

so my son went around looking somewhat unkept for much of his early life.

First there were the tantrums at the haircutters. The only thing that helped

with that was finding someone who was understanding and patient, and then keep

going to the same place so he could get used to it.

To my experience, keeping her hair very short would probably be a lot more

helpful than straightening it. We didn't give our son a choice, if that is a

problem. I always told him, when he starts washing and combing his hair every

day, then he gets a choice. That is fair. This also makes the time at the hair

dressers more tolerable. You can make it short and sweet. Skip the

conditioner, the styling and the hair spray, or whatever is upsetting her.

My son was always a little clumsy, and we found out when he was 12 that he has

fairly severe DCD (developmental coordination disorder). This is common with

Asperger, so your daughter could have this. People with this have more serious

problems with coordination and motor-planning than meets the eye. They usually

have general planning and organization deficits also.

So, after we found out about the DCD, we realized some things we never knew. We

found out that my son did not know HOW to wash his hair, even at age 12. He

wasn't naturally picking up such things the way typical kids do because of his

DCD and AS.

I had to show him step by step: Wet your head all over until all your hair is

wet, fill up your palm with shampoo, spread the shampoo all over your hair until

all of it is sudsy, then rinse it out until your hair squeaks. I used the

particular instructions I did because I noticed that he was not using enough

shampoo, not getting everywhere, and not rinsing the shampoo out enough.

I only had to tell my son this once; he was apparently attending very well.

Other people may need to hang up a list to follow. But, this had quite an

effect; he was getting his hair clean when before he wasn't.

Other than that, I have just had to be very consistent with insisting he wash

his hair. He still doesn't wash it on his own; I have to remind him it is his

day (we let him wash it every other day). I have to put my foot down, i.e.,

first shower and wash hair, then computer time.

[Guest guest]

>

How about a really short hair cut until she is more able to deal with the

maintainence? You still have to brush straight hair. I'd be very careful with

those harsh chemicals, maybe do some research on possible side effects? Those

are the same chemicals they use to give a perm and in my experience perms dry

out my hair and make it really hard to brush.

There are some heavy duty conditioners you could try to get easier to manage,

short curly hair? How about a really soft brush?

It's just my opinion but it seems you would be using these harsh chemicals 2-3

times a year if you decide to straighten and I'd be worried about all of that

exposure to toxins.

Regards, Sally

>

> Hi,

>

> I have been dealing with my girl hair since she was born. It is very curly and

it is hard to keep up with it.

>

> She does not like me to touch her head. I take her to the hair dresser every

week, but a have made the decision of strenghten her hair out for easy

maintenance. The problem is that she is very sensitive to smell and it will be

very difficult.

>

> I am planning to cover her nose with a mask, giver her medicine for nauseas

and bring her nintendo ds.

>

> Can somebody give me more suggestion?

>

> How can I make her confortable while the hair dresser do her hair?

>

>

[Guest guest]

I would recommend not going with the hair straightening, instead just keep her

hair short until things get easier for her. Straightening is a short term fix

that may not even work, as straight hair is just as hard as curly hair to take

care of. Plus side short curly hair looks really cute on girls imho! Also if

your daughter does not like the look of shorter haor, she just may be able to

tolerate the hair washing better?

My 5yr old daughter has big issues with washing her hair (she also has curly

hair!), but we found out if I let her lay on the counter she will let me wash

her hair in the sink. I also do a 10 countdown, so she knows exactly how much

longer she has with each step. Sometimes not all the shampoo is washed out if

she is wiggly, but it is better than nothing!

I could not image her being able to deal with all those harsh fumes and having

to sit still long enough to do the straightening procedure if she doesn't even

like hair washing which is a much faster process and less pungent!

Best of luck in your decisions,

Amie

[Guest guest]

You might go see an OT and talk about the sensitive head problem. THere should be things you can do to help lessen the sensitivity. Both my 2 boys have had this problem. I remember with the older one, his older sister would hold him down (literally laying on top of him!) so I could try and cut his hair when he was younger. As he got older, he got less bothered by it and we could finally take him to get it done professionally! My younger is still having problems with this. He cries, whines, complains, moves - the whole time. It is really tough. I hate doing it myself. But hair dressers we've gone to have not managed much better. They either get upset with him or they do a quick job to get it over with fast. Neither is very acceptable. If you find any good ideas, let us know!!

A few quick ideas - write up a simple social story for her as to what will happen at the hair salon when she has her hair done. If she knows what is going to happen next, she might be more relaxed about it.

Roxanna

"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." E. Burke

Re: ( ) my aspie girl does not let me to wash her hair and she looks neglected..

Hi,

I have been dealing with my girl hair since she was born. It is very curly and it is hard to keep up with it.

She does not like me to touch her head. I take her to the hair dresser every week, but a have made the decision of strenghten her hair out for easy maintenance. The problem is that she is very sensitive to smell and it will be very difficult.

I am planning to cover her nose with a mask, giver her medicine for nauseas and bring her nintendo ds.

Can somebody give me more suggestion?

How can I make her confortable while the hair dresser do her hair?

( ) Re: Allergy shots??? Yes or no?

My husband is an acupuncturist and he has a lot of enthusiastic patients who come to him for allergy relief. He often prescribes herbal remedies for allergies. I don't know what the herbs are, but wanted to confirm that acupuncture can help. For children, my husband usually doesn't use needles, just the gentle application of pressure or heat on the acupuncture points.

An Excellent Credit Score is 750. See Yours in Just 2 Easy Steps!

[Guest guest]

I think you have recieved great advice from everyone. I have a 4 year old who cant' stand to have her hair brushed. We are working with it. Her hair is very fine which makes it so easy to tangle. I use detangler,and a comb,to do the best I can without her looking "neglected". I keep her hair cut short. Right now these things work. She doesn't like her hair washed but I have found she likes her dad to wash her hair. So, at least its a place to start. I wish you the best.

From: Amie <amiedawn1@...>Subject: Re: ( ) my aspie girl does not let me to wash her hair and she looks neglected.. Date: Sunday, July 26, 2009, 9:30 PM

I would recommend not going with the hair straightening, instead just keep her hair short until things get easier for her. Straightening is a short term fix that may not even work, as straight hair is just as hard as curly hair to take care of. Plus side short curly hair looks really cute on girls imho! Also if your daughter does not like the look of shorter haor, she just may be able to tolerate the hair washing better?My 5yr old daughter has big issues with washing her hair (she also has curly hair!), but we found out if I let her lay on the counter she will let me wash her hair in the sink. I also do a 10 countdown, so she knows exactly how much longer she has with each step. Sometimes not all the shampoo is washed out if she is wiggly, but it is better than nothing!I could not image her being able to deal with all those harsh fumes and having to sit still long enough to do the straightening procedure if she doesn't even like hair

washing which is a much faster process and less pungent!Best of luck in your decisions,Amie

[Guest guest]

It is very hard to deal with her. The OT therapist gave her some kind of brush to brush her skin.The hair dresser is very patience and deals with her better than me. sure It is killing my wallet because I feel guilty and give the hair dresser a good tip to be so kind to her... ( ) Re: Allergy shots??? ?Yes or no?My husband is an acupuncturist and he has a lot of enthusiastic patients who come to him for allergy relief. He often prescribes herbal remedies for allergies. I don't know what the herbs are, but wanted to confirm that acupuncture can help. For children, my husband usually doesn't use needles, just the gentle application of pressure or heat on the acupuncture points. ?

[Guest guest]

Hi,She hates short hair, but she can not stand the maintenance of her hair. I just worry about the other children making fun of her.I will try it out if she can not take it we just wash her hair... ( ) Re: my aspie girl does not let me to wash her hair and she looks neglected..>How about a really short hair cut until she is more able to deal with the maintainence? You still have to brush straight hair. I'd be very careful with those harsh chemicals, maybe do some research on possible side effects? Those are the same chemicals they use to give a perm and in my experience perms dry out my hair and make it really hard to brush.There are some heavy duty conditioners you could try to get easier to manage, short curly hair? How about a really soft brush?It's just my opinion but it seems you would be using these harsh chemicals 2-3 times a year if you decide to straighten and I'd be worried about all of that exposure to toxins.Regards, Sally> > Hi, > > I have been dealing with my girl hair since she was born. It is very curly and it is hard to keep up with it. > > She does not like me to touch her head. I take her to the hair dresser every week, but a have made the decision of strenghten her hair out for easy maintenance. The problem is that she is very sensitive to smell and it will be very difficult. > > I am planning to cover her nose with a mask, giver her medicine for nauseas and bring her nintendo ds. > > Can somebody give me more suggestion? > > How can I make her confortable while the hair dresser do her hair? > >

[Guest guest]

It is a problem, I know. It may be something you have to deal with long term, unfortunately. Just keep doing what the OT suggests. And praise her and reward her for letting you deal with her hair.

Roxanna

"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." E. Burke

Re: ( ) my aspie girl does not let me to wash her hair and she looks neglected..

It is very hard to deal with her. The OT therapist gave her some kind of brush to brush her skin.

The hair dresser is very patience and deals with her better than me. sure It is killing my wallet because I feel guilty and give the hair dresser a good tip to be so kind to her...

( ) Re: Allergy shots??? ?Yes or no?

My husband is an acupuncturist and he has a lot of enthusiastic patients who come to him for allergy relief. He often prescribes herbal remedies for allergies. I don't know what the herbs are, but wanted to confirm that acupuncture can help. For children, my husband usually doesn't use needles, just the gentle application of pressure or heat on the acupuncture points. ?

An Excellent Credit Score is 750. See Yours in Just 2 Easy Steps!