Guest guest Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 This is a trait of someone with very ridgid thinking. As you put it black and white. It is not a critieria for a diagnosis of AS but many do have these trait. In my daughter it is also part of a very irritable mood that we are treating with prozac (we did trial zoloft). It really got out of hand as stress went up that she couldn't cope with anyone at school or at home, every little thing was setting her off. Watch out for how much of his day is spent in this irritable mood. I was thinking it was part of who she is, but in our case it was a mood disorder. Pam esa > > I am wondering if this is a aspie trait or a " tween " trait. My son (10)has become extremely judgmental. It's like everything is getting much more black and white with nothing in between. My NT daughter is 7 and she is constantly tricking him- but my son has decided she is a liar and is completely intolerant of her. Everyday he says to me, " Mom she lied to me. She said this but it was a lie. All she does is lie. She ALWAYS lies. I can't take it anymore!! " and to me it was no big deal but he is now becoming quite judgmental of my parenting! He will say, " Lying is not ok! She needs a consequence. " And then he looks at me sideways if I blow it off. He catches me at any inconsistency- like one day you can have candy and one day not. I think he is thinking I am crazy! Is it the age or the AS or a wicked combo? LOL > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 One of my son's biggest challenges as a person with is cognitive rigidity and that sounds like what you are describing. I wouldn't necessarily call it judgmental because that makes it sound like a character flaw. He probably doesn't pick up on social cues very easily so it' all very black and white to him. I affectionately call my son the judge, jury, and sometimes executioner of his 9 yr old NT sister because he expects her to understand things over her head (like math) or she will be acting like a normal child and say something with an exaggeration to be funny and D will jump on her like she just committed a sin! Once I figured this out, I started handling things differently between them. If he misinterpreted something that happened, I'd break it down for him, even deciphering body language for him. Sometimes i'd do this in front of and sometimes I'd do it in private. This is called a social autopsy. Creepy but accurate phrase to describe it! Sent from my iPhoneOn Mar 10, 2011, at 8:00 AM, "APGirl" <julia.colleen@...> wrote: I am wondering if this is a aspie trait or a "tween" trait. My son (10)has become extremely judgmental. It's like everything is getting much more black and white with nothing in between. My NT daughter is 7 and she is constantly tricking him- but my son has decided she is a liar and is completely intolerant of her. Everyday he says to me, "Mom she lied to me. She said this but it was a lie. All she does is lie. She ALWAYS lies. I can't take it anymore!!" and to me it was no big deal but he is now becoming quite judgmental of my parenting! He will say, "Lying is not ok! She needs a consequence." And then he looks at me sideways if I blow it off. He catches me at any inconsistency- like one day you can have candy and one day not. I think he is thinking I am crazy! Is it the age or the AS or a wicked combo? LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 Still getting familiar with my iPhone keyboard! I meant Aspergers, not the name of this LISTSERV!Sent from my iPhoneOn Mar 10, 2011, at 9:01 AM, MacAllister <smacalli@...> wrote: One of my son's biggest challenges as a person with is cognitive rigidity and that sounds like what you are describing. I wouldn't necessarily call it judgmental because that makes it sound like a character flaw. He probably doesn't pick up on social cues very easily so it' all very black and white to him. I affectionately call my son the judge, jury, and sometimes executioner of his 9 yr old NT sister because he expects her to understand things over her head (like math) or she will be acting like a normal child and say something with an exaggeration to be funny and D will jump on her like she just committed a sin! Once I figured this out, I started handling things differently between them. If he misinterpreted something that happened, I'd break it down for him, even deciphering body language for him. Sometimes i'd do this in front of and sometimes I'd do it in private. This is called a social autopsy. Creepy but accurate phrase to describe it! Sent from my iPhoneOn Mar 10, 2011, at 8:00 AM, "APGirl" <julia.colleen@...> wrote: I am wondering if this is a aspie trait or a "tween" trait. My son (10)has become extremely judgmental. It's like everything is getting much more black and white with nothing in between. My NT daughter is 7 and she is constantly tricking him- but my son has decided she is a liar and is completely intolerant of her. Everyday he says to me, "Mom she lied to me. She said this but it was a lie. All she does is lie. She ALWAYS lies. I can't take it anymore!!" and to me it was no big deal but he is now becoming quite judgmental of my parenting! He will say, "Lying is not ok! She needs a consequence." And then he looks at me sideways if I blow it off. He catches me at any inconsistency- like one day you can have candy and one day not. I think he is thinking I am crazy! Is it the age or the AS or a wicked combo? LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 Yes he does seem very irritable. But it's like our communication is just a series of miscommunications. Most things I say to him he misinterprets and gets defensive. He usually think I have some alterior motive to asking a question and seems very confused and mistrusting. He argues constantly and I have to explain every detail to him before he admits that he was wrong. His general attitude is I KNOOOOWWW!!!! Then you have to say well actually no...blah blah blah but I get frustrated because I am his mother and he should just trust me! Rigid thinking- definitely but it does seem like it's getting a bit worse and he's becoming more intolerant of his annoying family who wants to spend time with him. I try not to get my feelings hurt but SHEESH > >> > I am wondering if this is a aspie trait or a "tween" trait. My son (10)has become extremely judgmental. It's like everything is getting much more black and white with nothing in between. My NT daughter is 7 and she is constantly tricking him- but my son has decided she is a liar and is completely intolerant of her. Everyday he says to me, "Mom she lied to me. She said this but it was a lie. All she does is lie. She ALWAYS lies. I can't take it anymore!!" and to me it was no big deal but he is now becoming quite judgmental of my parenting! He will say, "Lying is not ok! She needs a consequence." And then he looks at me sideways if I blow it off. He catches me at any inconsistency- like one day you can have candy and one day not. I think he is thinking I am crazy! Is it the age or the AS or a wicked combo? LOL> > > > > >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 I think this is definitely an aspie trait, my son does it a lot too. I think aspies just tend to see the world in more black and white terms. " She said something that it untrue and that's a lie. " With my son, he doesn't understand if someone is just teasing, joking, kidding. He will call the person a liar if what they are saying isn't true. I don't necessarily think they are " judging " people. They are just expressing what they feel to be true if that makes any sense. I am not sure what to do about it other than keep explaining, " Now honey, that person was just teasing. He is trying to be funny. " > > I am wondering if this is a aspie trait or a " tween " trait. My son (10)has become extremely judgmental. It's like everything is getting much more black and white with nothing in between. My NT daughter is 7 and she is constantly tricking him- but my son has decided she is a liar and is completely intolerant of her. Everyday he says to me, " Mom she lied to me. She said this but it was a lie. All she does is lie. She ALWAYS lies. I can't take it anymore!! " and to me it was no big deal but he is now becoming quite judgmental of my parenting! He will say, " Lying is not ok! She needs a consequence. " And then he looks at me sideways if I blow it off. He catches me at any inconsistency- like one day you can have candy and one day not. I think he is thinking I am crazy! Is it the age or the AS or a wicked combo? LOL > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 I have been trially a second antidepressant for my 13 year old daughter, and she is being kinder and calmer. A stressed out person is not an easy person to get along with. Unfortunately life in general can be stressful for some kids. I have tried years and parent training in behavior therapy and cognitive therapy and her behavior was not getting better, it was getting worse. At that point it is easier to try medication, I tried all the alternate methods that was evidence based. Perhaps this is some of his problem too. Pam > > > > > > I am wondering if this is a aspie trait or a " tween " trait. My son > (10)has become extremely judgmental. It's like everything is getting > much more black and white with nothing in between. My NT daughter is 7 > and she is constantly tricking him- but my son has decided she is a liar > and is completely intolerant of her. Everyday he says to me, " Mom she > lied to me. She said this but it was a lie. All she does is lie. She > ALWAYS lies. I can't take it anymore!! " and to me it was no big deal but > he is now becoming quite judgmental of my parenting! He will say, " Lying > is not ok! She needs a consequence. " And then he looks at me sideways if > I blow it off. He catches me at any inconsistency- like one day you can > have candy and one day not. I think he is thinking I am crazy! Is it the > age or the AS or a wicked combo? LOL > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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