What do you do to keep your sanity?

August 1, 2010

There are so many answers to this. I have a friend whose house over looks a lake. My DH works late on Fri and Sat so Tues, I can go to her house and sit on her porch and she is more than happy to take her kids (to their jobs) and leave me to sit in the quiet. I recommend her! LOL Well, or finding a friend such as this. More practical is definitely, quiet unadulterated, no kid time. Some people can find it in religion (I know you're not) or alternately yoga or meditation. I do all 3 of these. It's calming, quiet and kid free, a few hours a week. Some weeks are bad and none of the above happens. In those cases (it's 4:30 est right now) I find myself stealing some precious night hours to sit in a hot shower and/or just drink tea in the quiet of my living room. Mostly

the goal is to drop from your mind all the medical, the issues, the problems, the fixes the next encounters the next struggle. Just sit and stay clear for a bit and unload all that out of your mind. That's all I can suggest. HTH. ConnieFrom: bucaroobonzai2003 <bucaroobonzai2003@...>Subject: ( ) What do you do to keep your sanity? Date: Saturday, July 31, 2010, 11:28 PM

I've been having a rough run lately. I have virtually no family support, and get almost no breaks away from my Aspie son. So any suggestions on keeping sane and relaxed.

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August 1, 2010

Find 2 support groups.....one for your state and only locally.If you can find someone who can swap childcare with you that would be great for you too.HthRobyn-- Sent from my Palm PreOn Jul 31, 2010 23:33, bucaroobonzai2003 <bucaroobonzai2003@...> wrote:

I've been having a rough run lately. I have virtually no family support, and get almost no breaks away from my Aspie son. So any suggestions on keeping sane and relaxed.

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August 1, 2010

Robyn, I quickly scanned your post and read " find someone who can swap children "

instead of " swap childcare " and I was ready to find that group! Where is that

one...I have one to swap! He's been pretty awful today. We are playing the " You

lie, so I lie " game...not working very well.

LOL

sue in TN

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> & nbsp;

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> I've been having a rough run lately. I have virtually no family support, and

get almost no breaks away from my Aspie son. So any suggestions on keeping sane

and relaxed.

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August 1, 2010

Hi ,

Do you have a spouse helping you out at all? I am a stay-at-home-mom of an aspie 4 yr old, and we have essentially no family & no support whatsoever. I have been on the brink of insanity for quite some time now, but I do have a husband that I have forced to take his son more & more of the time. I pretty much have my child velcro'd to me 24/7, and it's been that way since birth. This past January, I told my husband I was scheduling regular breaks for myself and putting them on the calendar. At first it was just like 1.5 hours per week, but I have been adding a little more here & there as I think my husband can tolerate it. At times, though, I have to tell my child that Mommy is extremely tired and needs to sit on the sofa and do nothing for 30 minutes, and with luck he will go in his room and play by himself while I chill. This is not probably the most helpful information, but I wanted you to know

that I feel your pain.

Self-medicating with mocha frappes helps, too.

-- (mom of 4yo Aspergian)

I've been having a rough run lately. I have virtually no family support, and get almost no breaks away from my Aspie son. So any suggestions on keeping sane and relaxed.-

August 1, 2010

I feel your pain. We have no family anywhere near or in our state. My husband

travels frequently and I know the pain of needing an hour here or there to

rejeuvinate. I found a sitter, while she's not available as often as I'd like,

when she comes over it's for me to go to the gym. I have found that my stress

levels go down dramatically afterwards. When my husband is home I go to the gym

at nights while he's putting the kids to bed. I wouldn't normally like to go at

night, but I gotta take what I can get. Sometimes, if I don't have enough time

to get to the gym or if it's closed I go for a brisk walk--I'm talking break a

sweat walk. I would highly recommend that any parent with a kid like ours get

physical to help reduce stress.

Also, I always have around that I enjoy reading, so when I happen to get 10 or

20 minutes of free time, I grab my book. It's a mini escape. I also use the book

when I'm giving someone a bath or have it in the kitchen if I'm waiting for

something cooking. It's a small mental escape.

It's also so therapeutic to have other parents to talk with that know what you'r

dealing with. The other thing I have done is to get a collection of comedy

movies. (we still have a vcr, so the tapes for resale are cheap) When I'm

feeling in the dumps, I put in one of my tapes. Some in my collection: Rat Race,

Mad Dog and Glory, Dicky , Tootsie, Groundhog's Day, Naked Gun, Broadcast

News. Not sure your taste or age, but maybe some of these could work for you.

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> I've been having a rough run lately. I have virtually no family support, and

get almost no breaks away from my Aspie son. So any suggestions on keeping sane

and relaxed.

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> -

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August 1, 2010

Thanks everyone for the suggestions. I think I've got enough people (other

parents of Aspies) to talk to about Asperger's and my son, but I've really got

to work on the relaxation stuff. My wife does a lot, but isn't very good at

taking my son out of the house on her own and she has been stressed lately as

well so I don't want to push her too hard. I'll be scheduling in more ME time

soon, and I might be able to add in some breaks by using the YMCA childcare

while I work out.

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August 2, 2010

,

I've been working really hard with my son, and we do lessons for about 4-5 hours a day. Even he noticed my exhaustion, and said "Mom, you look really tired when we're done, sometimes."

What I do, is if he's done well on his lessons, he can earn an hour of computer time, or hour of game time. That gives me an hour of peace! Because I don't have any support groups or much family either.

If he's had a not-so-great day, then he just goes to his room to relax, and do his own thing, and I go to mine. We also have an agreement, that if either of us needs a time-out from each other, we make the "time out" sign, and say when we'll be back to discuss things. I have no problem telling my son when I need some time to myself. He's usually pretty good about it. If he happens to be in the mood that absolutely nothing can keep him entertained (although his room has enough things for 10 kids!) Then I give him many suggestions, set out the supplies he'll need, and then leave it up to him, and he'll usually do something. So I may leave out the coloring books, a couple games, a puzzle, his music, and a movie or two. Then I explain that I still need a time out, and he's going to have to figure out what to do with his time. He usually does.

I don't know your situation, but I hope that helps some.

Kathy