Argh!

March 5, 2005

>

> I usually hate it when people complain and worry about how much

> weight they've lost, but here I am about to do the same thing...

>

> I weighed myself on my home scale before I went to Mexico, and I

> weigh myself on the same scale now. According to it, I have lost a

> total of 22 pounds since surgery (I am one month out) but am only 4

> pounds down in the two and a half weeks since I've gotten home.

>

> I seriously don't understand how it is physically possible for me

to

> have lost only 4 pounds in this time, since I barely take in enough

> calories to feed a hamster! I am tracking my intake on fitday.com,

> and I have to really *try* hard to get 600 calories a day in my

> system. I am doing some very light exercise, but nothing that would

> be muscle-building.

>

> I make sure I get 80 grams of protein in a day, and have been

eating

> small amounts of refried beans to give me extra protein and so

forth.

> I take two children's chewable vitamins every day.

>

> What in the world is going on????? What more can I do?

>

> Help! Help! Help!

>

> ------------------

> in Jamaica

> RNY Feb 5, 2005

> ------------------

Hi ,

First off, don't let this upset you! I had surgery back in Sept.

with Dr. A. I haven't visisted the board much lately but I do try to

read them from time to time.

Your body has to go thur an adjustment period from the weight you

have lost. Also, did you take your body measurments? Your body also

loses inches instead of weight. I took mine when I first got back

from Mexico. A month later when I wasn't losing I went and took

measurements ... and ohhh my what a surprise! I had lost a over all

body total of like 20 inches! Also, with lapband you do not lose

weight as fast as other surgery.. lossing 4-8 lbs. a month I have

read is a good average. ( and honestly to me, much healthier)

Also, I feel you need to be eating more then 600 cal. a day.

Basicly you are placing your body in a starvation mode. It is

clinging onto what is in your body. Hope that makes sense. Honestly I

feel you should be at 1000 cal. a day. And also how much exercise are

you getting? If its nothing more then walking around the block a few

times a day... do it!

Another mistake I found myself making.... just because something

says( food) " DIET " or " Low Cal " it isn't! Watch the sugar count in

foods. Something as simple as Yogart has a lot of sugar in one of

those small containers. I have found the best one to be Beyers Ligth

as far as the least amount of sugars. Alot of your protein drinks

harbor alot of sugars. Keep a watch on that! ( and honestly after

your 2nd month slow down on the protein shakes, you should be getting

enough protein from foods to replace some of those drinks)

I also can not stress enough ... water, water, water! Water helps

to flush out your body and do so many wonderful things for you.

Basicly when your urine is not clear when you go to the bathroom your

not getting enough water. ( of course some meds can alter this)

As of the end of March it will have been 6 months for me. I have

lost some where around 55-60 lbs. Inches over all body around 35. And

honestly I do not get no where near the exercise I should be doing,

but I do make sure at least twice a week I go out walking some

where if its only around a store for a hour.

Read your food lables! Its funny how things you think shouldn't

hurt are!

I have had my 2nd fill and honestly at this point I am pretty much

content with my restriction. Sometimes I wonder if its to tight,

but then I stop and think... ok did you REALLY eat that slow enough or

did you REALLY chew that as good as you could have... and usually

that answer is NO Take your time, chew and tiny bits!

Hope some of the information has eased your mind some.. if any

questions please feel free to contact me. Or anyone for that

matter

Hope all the " older " group is doing well... miss talking to you

all!

Nina and Dr. A BIG HUGS You guys are the best!

Debi

March 5, 2005

, That is actually really good weight loss! I am losing about a

pound a week and have a lot of weight to lose. A lot of times your

body is going through so much adjustment and just really holds onto

that stored energy. Especially when you hit the starvation mode. I

know it can be frustrating but consider the fact that your body has

been used to getting a certain amount of calories a day and has a

routine. Then you cut it down to 600 or less a day and your body

starts to freak out thinking that you are going to starve it. Just

hold out for a little while longer and your weight loss will resume.

But also consider that if you lose 2 pounds a week on average, you

will lose over 100 pounds in a year. Keep up the good work. You are

doing great!!

Maggie

March 6, 2005

, 22 lbs in one month is alot, I know you have only done four of those in the last 2 and half weeks, but your body is probably trying to catch up with its self, my gosh, you lost 18 lbs in the first week and a half, give your self a hand.. that is awesome, just remember this is a life time change not some quick fix over night thing, once you take it off this time, it should be the last. Take care, and don't get discouraged,

Tracie in Aledo, Texas.

July 5, 2005

>

Yeah, fire that idiot. These doc will kill you and all they want is

to put you drugs and take your money. Stay off that crap and find

someone who will work with you. Maybe some one on here knows a doc

in your area. Where are you located?

Greg

I've finally calmed down since last week and can explain what

> happened.

>

> I saw the doc on Tues and took more tests. It's a long story but

he

> may be planning on taking me off the meds. He made the suggestion

> that I may be depressed... if you feel like poopy kaka all the

time

> it's hard to not get depressed. I feel much better now since I

> started the therapy but now he's saying my tests were read wrong

and

> I don't need this type of therapy. So after more than a year and

> 25lbs gained I don't need this - I need brain drugs. After a

survey

> of friends about my mental condition they laughed at the idea that

I

> was depressed. A year ago I probably was because I felt bad all

the

> time, went through a divorce yadda yadda yadda.

>

> Basically this is the nut as told to me by my endo: my total

> testosterone is made up of three items - 1. Free testosterone

> (floating freely) and 2. Bound testosterone (attached to Hbg) and

3.

> Albumen (testosterone bound to albumen). My bound and albumen are

> very low and when added to free I get a very low reading.

Basically

> if you add two negatives to a positive you get a low number. This

is

> the case. My free testosterone is too high because of the meds but

> the bound and albumen mean very little in the way of processing

> testosterone. So he's saying that my testosterone is normal (ha!)

but

> when combined it appears low. Normal humans have hbg in the 25-30

> range - mine is 9-10, which is at the very bottom of the readable

> range.

>

> So test results are due in today... depending on the results...

maybe

> new doc, new meds, or status quo with a bump in meds. Even my

> chiropractor even has ideas about what is wrong and how to correct

> because he has had something similar.

>

> Here is the time line on meds and treatment over the last year.

>

> March 04 – Finally went to doc complaining of fatigue and sexual

> dysfunction, age 39. I thought chronic fatigue syndrome. PC doc

hit

> the nail on the head with andropause/hypogonadism and put me on

the

> patch first and then androgel. This moved my T level into normal

> range. Initial test was 230's.

>

> June 04 – had to change PC to a new doc because of insurance. She

> sent me to an endo with all my results. T level was still low but

doc

> took me off meds to establish baseline. I crashed! T level went to

> 91!

>

> Aug 04 - Went back to androgel once a day. Test results up to

250's.

>

> Oct 04 – Androgel up to twice a day. Test results went into the

high

> 400s. Starting to feel much better.

>

> Dec 04 – Asked to change to depo injections because the androgel

was

> so expensive under my insurance, $200+ a month. First dose was 1.5

x

> 3 weeks.

>

> March 05 – test results drop to 200's again. Feel good first week,

> fair second week and I crater on the 3rd week. Dose increased to

1.5

> x 2 weeks.

>

> May 05 – test results at 577 yippie! Starting to turn the corner.

On

> my own I split my meds to .75 every week to help with water

retention

> and peak and valley. Light at the end of the tunnel.

>

> Jun 05 – Go in to talk with doc about bumping to 1.0 every week

per

> info I have received from you guys and the net. Want to confirm a

lot

> of stuff and tell him I'm finally where I need to be. Then I get

hit

> with the above bombshell.

>

> Any ideas, support, evidence would be greatly appreciated.

April 12, 2010

Hello! I'm new here too and I had exactly the same problem! I did the low carb

diet for 3 months and was so constipated, I needed to do enemas. My bowel

movement is better with a bit of carbs. I dont know how to deal with this I have

stopped the diet and reintroduced grains and it is better but I dont know if I

should have. some candida diet allow some grains while others dont..

>

> Hello Bee, hello all.

>

> I'm new here and I'm extremely frustrated. I've been doing a version of the

candida diet for 3 months. I thought I had it down but I became interested in

Bee's version because it seemed to have less supplements than the other one I

was on.

>

> I've been eating for my blood type for years which means very little meat and

lots of fruits, grains and vegetables. A bout with c dificle 10 years ago and an

excessive antibiotic treatment turned my digestive system upside down and I've

been relying on cleanses and grain fibre to keep myself regular. This diet has

shut everything down.

>

> I'm starting to feel like I'd rather just go back to my old life. I could

handle the hypoglycemia and anemia as long as there was a glass of wine and a

small peice of chocolate waiting for me at the end of every night.

>

> Does anyone know approximately how long it takes the bowels to adjust to this

diet?

>

April 13, 2010

>

> Hello Bee, hello all.

>

> I'm new here and I'm extremely frustrated. I've been doing a version of the

candida diet for 3 months. I thought I had it down but I became interested in

Bee's version because it seemed to have less supplements than the other one I

was on.

>

> I've been eating for my blood type for years which means very little meat and

lots of fruits, grains and vegetables. A bout with c dificle 10 years ago and an

excessive antibiotic treatment turned my digestive system upside down and I've

been relying on cleanses and grain fibre to keep myself regular. This diet has

shut everything down.

>

> I'm starting to feel like I'd rather just go back to my old life. I could

handle the hypoglycemia and anemia as long as there was a glass of wine and a

small peice of chocolate waiting for me at the end of every night.

>

> Does anyone know approximately how long it takes the bowels to adjust to this

diet?

+++Hi there. Welcome to our group. Is your name Rhonda?

As you probably realize fibres actually cause bowel problems, and aren't healthy

like we are led to believe.

I don't recommend cleanses, but I do recommend enemas. All of this is explained

in my candida articles, so please ensure you read two important articles so you

understand what you need to do and why:

1) How to Successfully Overcome Candida

http://www.healingnaturallybybee.com/articles/intro2.php

2) Curing Candida, How to Get Started

http://www.healingnaturallybybee.com/articles/intro1.php

For encouragement and inspiration see these wonderful Success Stories by members

of this group: http://www.healingnaturallybybee.com/success/index.php

After you have read and understand more about digestion, candida, etc. please

get back to us with questions.

The best in health, Bee

April 13, 2010

>

> Hello! I'm new here too and I had exactly the same problem! I did the low carb

diet for 3 months and was so constipated, I needed to do enemas. My bowel

movement is better with a bit of carbs. I dont know how to deal with this I have

stopped the diet and reintroduced grains and it is better but I dont know if I

should have. some candida diet allow some grains while others dont..

+++Hi Caroline. Grains are very damaging to the digestive system.

The reason my program gets results is because of the high " good " fats, low-carbs

(no grains, etc.), etc. That's why it isn't just for candida and is an overall

healing program.

You may need to start with the 9-Day Program, but first change over to all of

the foods allowed.

Ensure you carefully read two important articles so you understand candida, and

know what you need to do and why:

1) How to Successfully Overcome Candida

http://www.healingnaturallybybee.com/articles/intro2.php

2) Curing Candida, How to Get Started

http://www.healingnaturallybybee.com/articles/intro1.php

For encouragement and inspiration see these wonderful Success Stories by members

of this group: http://www.healingnaturallybybee.com/success/index.php

Bee

April 13, 2010

Thank you Bee for answering my question. I've always been afraid of becoming

dependant on enemas so I've avoided them entirely. I will consider them if it

continues to be a problem. I have had some success with skin brushing so I will

continue that daily.

I have increased my fat intake to the 200 grams that I'm meant to take but I

find after a couple of days that this diet is very rich for me. I've also never

been a meat eater.

Any suggestions?

Thank you,

Rhonda

> >

> > Hello Bee, hello all.

> >

> > I'm new here and I'm extremely frustrated. I've been doing a version of the

candida diet for 3 months. I thought I had it down but I became interested in

Bee's version because it seemed to have less supplements than the other one I

was on.

> >

> > I've been eating for my blood type for years which means very little meat

and lots of fruits, grains and vegetables. A bout with c dificle 10 years ago

and an excessive antibiotic treatment turned my digestive system upside down and

I've been relying on cleanses and grain fibre to keep myself regular. This diet

has shut everything down.

> >

> > I'm starting to feel like I'd rather just go back to my old life. I could

handle the hypoglycemia and anemia as long as there was a glass of wine and a

small peice of chocolate waiting for me at the end of every night.

> >

> > Does anyone know approximately how long it takes the bowels to adjust to

this diet?

>

> +++Hi there. Welcome to our group. Is your name Rhonda?

>

> As you probably realize fibres actually cause bowel problems, and aren't

healthy like we are led to believe.

>

> I don't recommend cleanses, but I do recommend enemas. All of this is

explained in my candida articles, so please ensure you read two important

articles so you understand what you need to do and why:

>

> 1) How to Successfully Overcome Candida

> http://www.healingnaturallybybee.com/articles/intro2.php

>

> 2) Curing Candida, How to Get Started

> http://www.healingnaturallybybee.com/articles/intro1.php

>

> For encouragement and inspiration see these wonderful Success Stories by

members of this group: http://www.healingnaturallybybee.com/success/index.php

>

> After you have read and understand more about digestion, candida, etc. please

get back to us with questions.

>

> The best in health, Bee

>

April 14, 2010

>

> Thank you Bee for answering my question. I've always been afraid of becoming

dependant on enemas so I've avoided them entirely. I will consider them if it

continues to be a problem. I have had some success with skin brushing so I will

continue that daily.

+++Hi Rhonda. Your body doesn't become dependent upon enemas if you follow the

schedule on the articles, which means slowly weaning off of them too.

>

> I have increased my fat intake to the 200 grams that I'm meant to take but I

find after a couple of days that this diet is very rich for me. I've also never

been a meat eater.

+++What do you mean by rich for you? Meats and fats are the very easiest foods

for any humans to digest and utilize. If you increase your good fats too

quickly you will experience more detoxing symptoms, since they are the best

antioxidants anyone can consume.

Of course fats are processed on 2 pathways in the body so you need all of so

processing can occur like it should, i.e. vitamins A, D, E, and omega 3. Of

course they also require proteins, minerals, other vitamins, etc. - all

nutrients work together.

The best, Bee

February 6, 2011

Happy Super Bowl Sunday everyone!

I am having a life here. My youngest ds has dyslexia. He is "aspie on the edges" but that's kind of a family trait here. He is 11 yo and in 5th grade. He's smart enough to get by a lot of things and that is one reason it was so hard to get his dyslexia taken seriously at the school. He was always spotted for extra help, tutoring, fast forword, etc. He was RtI'd to death. But then once he got some help, he'd improve that much and they'd stop helping, where he'd continue to fall behind from there. For instance, his need to learn to read only mattered until he got good enough to pass the state test (by 4 points!). Granted, it took three years to get to there. lol. Then he went from needing help to "being lazy." Finally, we pulled him out and e-school him since the first quarter of 4th grade. He was coming home screaming and throwing things as soon as he walked in the door. So we had to make a change.

The problem I am having is with OT's. In theory, I love these people. They should have so many answers to so many of our problems! I haven't been able to find one to work with my ds. Partly, the problem is that he is "aspie on the edges." He shuts down when things get too hard. He's failed so much that he is more apt to give up and preserve whatever dignity he has left. But he will try until he decides you are making fun of him or calling him "stupid." That's natural. But he is more likely to shut down than the average kid although it does take a bit of effort to tick him off that much.

The school OT's never helped. He got OT in school off and on. They could tell he had trouble tracking with his eyes, for instance, but never had any clue what to do to help him work on that. Then the last eval they did, the OT did not even use his correct age to determine his scores (which were already poor enough) and kept saying handwriting was not important. The e-school of course, has to contract to private therapists for kids who need therapy. So he has one hour per week of OT. The first OT we saw did the new evaluation and she wrote a really good report and really got the problems he was having. I was elated. We worked to get the new school to let us see this one specifically. I did not realize she was also a Naturopath. She spent the whole hour long session "healing" his inner self. Very little fine motor work or help with visual alignment issues. Just a lot of hocus pocus (hold these, snap, it's all gone). I went anyway because we really need help with some of this stuff. And maybe she could help - her report was great! She did have some good ideas as well. So I tried to keep an open mind to see where it was going. But it wasn't working. She had him in tears finally one day as she tried to "erase a bad memory" and it was just so not OT. He refused to go back and I agreed it was not going to help to keep doing that sort of thing.

So we switched to another OT that the school found. She has been not so great so far. She isn't doing anything weird but she isn't doing anything else. She has decided he should "notice" he's not leaving spaces between words and that will fix the problem. Only that is the problem. He can tell his writing is a mess just fine. He just can't make it better. I thought that would be her job - to do activities to improve his skills in these areas so he could notice these things and improve. But instead, her method seems to be, "He should just pay better attention and he won't have that problem." she makes him write paragraphs from a book - he has the worst time copying from things and hates doing it - and then she goes through it and nit picks at everything he has messed up. It's really defeating for him. And then she says, "Should there be a space between those words?" and he visibly looks like he wants to throw up on her. I know he is thinking, "Duh!" and feeling like she is talking down to him. He's not stupid and he knows this is a problem. But spacing is a problem he can't seem to figure out on his own....hence the OT!! Then the more she talks to him, the worse he feels, the more he refuses to cooperate or even speak to her and the more she decides he's just being obstinate and could do it if he just wanted to, so she talks more and pushes more, repeating this awful ugly circle for the whole hour long session. This week, for instance, I have a card I am supposed to place next to him when he writes things. It lists the 3 things he needs to "fix" with his writing and I thought, "If all it takes to fix this problem is to nag him about it, I can do that on my own!" lol) I guess I thought she would have exercises to do to improve his skills.

I told her I didn't agree that this was something he could fix if he wanted to. She explained to me that when we hurry when we write, it comes out sloppy and that is what he is doing. I didn't even agree because I can write quickly and neatly at the same time. So I am not seeing how this "theory" holds water. But I said that was not really a problem he has. He's always had these issues of spacing whether he takes his time writing or writes quickly - and so do my other two ds's. I don't feel it's just laziness on his part. But she really implied that it was. I asked if there were not activities we could do to work on these skills (i.e. something even FUN?? Dare I say fun?) and she didn't answer me. She just repeated that he needs to "pay attention" when he is writing. I get the idea that OT is going to be a long dreary hour of making him write and then telling him it looks awful. Even if her method was a good one, it isn't working with my ds who is missing the point.

This takes 3 hours. I drive almost an hour to get there, an hour in the therapy, an hour home. Then he is so ticked off he refuses to even speak to me. So any more schooling on these days is impossible. It's a wasted day.

Somehow, I feel defeated. How many OT's do you have to go through to find one that is even passable and can work with this kid? I have a short list to discuss with her this next week in the hopes of salvaging the situation and have already read two books on visual perception to try and educate myself more about what he needs. But I'm not feeling confident that this is going to go well. I hope I am wrong. We'll see. Do you think the school will think we are just nit-picky people if we have to find yet another OT to work with him? Or should I give up and just figure out what things we can do on our own? Aren't these people supposed to be trained to work with kids just like this? WAAAAAAAAHHH!!!

Has anyone else had to go through a series of therapists like this? How many did you go through before finding a real one? And is it worth it to take the kid to so many with so many failures? I am feeling like he is not going to even go to a new one at this point, he is so done with this nonsense. And frankly, I AM TOO!!!

I am probably just venting here. It's just so frustrating to get to this point where I should be seeing my kid get help and not getting help. And wasting another year. Argh!!

Roxanna

â€œOur lives begin to end the day we

become silent about things that matter.â€ - Luther King, Jr.

February 6, 2011

Hi Roxanna,I fully understand you, and I am to let you know that having a bad OT or ST is not only a waste of time but also detrimental to your son because they only keep emphasizing what he does wrong, not what he does right, so it becomes a nagging thing that only makes our children feel more and more inadequate. I had the same problem with the Speech Therapy my son was 6 then (dyslexic and asp on the edges as you call it) he was with her with a year with NO progress at all, and she kept saying that it is because he is lazy and does not do the exercices, my son hated her, I should have listen to my son earlier, one day I was dropping him with the Speech Therapist after school, and she said in front of him "he is far behind, sometimes certain kids

learn at a slower pace than other, I think your son is not doing well" then she looked at my son and said: " Well, let see if you do something right today". Immediately in that moment I confronted her, I sent my son to the library and I told her: "How can you to to any child like this? have you taken any course in Psychology? do you know that the most fragile part in dyslexic children is their self-esteem? Do you know that they already feel like a failure and is up to us to change that? I was furious, I terminated her in that moment, took my son back home and stop Speech Therapy all together for 6 months and we finally moved districts to a wonderful school where he is finally pronouncing the OR, he used to say: deer, instead or door, or flair instead of floor, now he is 8 and he has progressed tremendously, and ST is caring and he loves her because she makes him feel good about himself ( which I think is very important) so in my

opinion, yes your not only waisting your time but you are also driving so long for your son to feel bad about himself, I don't think is a good idea, either you request another OT (some of them do not have a clue of what they are doing) or stop with that one and get one privately. My son is reading grade level after going to the University to a program for dyslexic children where he receives Orthon Guillingham program, so I don't have to worry about that, he loves reading! we read to him since he was born. He still has sensory issues, but for that I am hiring a private OT (insurance will cover 80%) to work with him. He is sensory seeker, he has vestibular and proprioceptive issues, he does swimming (which has helped tremendously) and this summer he is starting hippotherapy, he is very sweet, only loud when he gets frustrated, has lots of problems with Math like I told you before, but he tries very hard, he can't do spelling (oral)

but if he practices the words,he can spell perfectly when he writes the word, so that is good enough for me. Have you tried to require in the IEP to do everything typed in the computer? In my son's school they told me that very soon in Middle School they will allow him to do everything in the computer (because he has so much trouble writing cursive). My heart goes to you Roxanne, I can tell you are doing so much for your son, but remember some of the helpers can damage his self stem in the way, some teacher have good intentions but no knowledge of Child Psychology, and some of them they don't even like children.Good luck, and have a nice Super Bowl Sunday, my son and my husband are going out to get me a present, my birthday is coming on Tuesday, Malls will be empty.All the best as always, From: Roxanna <MadIdeas@...> Sent: Sun, February 6, 2011 8:58:44 AMSubject: ( ) Argh!

Happy Super Bowl Sunday everyone!

I am having a life here. My youngest ds has dyslexia. He is "aspie on the edges" but that's kind of a family trait here. He is 11 yo and in 5th grade. He's smart enough to get by a lot of things and that is one reason it was so hard to get his dyslexia taken seriously at the school. He was always spotted for extra help, tutoring, fast forword, etc. He was RtI'd to death. But then once he got some help, he'd improve that much and they'd stop helping, where he'd continue to fall behind from there. For instance, his need to learn to read only mattered until he got good enough to pass the state test (by 4 points!). Granted, it took three years to get to there. lol. Then he went from needing help to "being lazy." Finally, we pulled him out and e-school him since the first quarter of 4th grade. He was coming home screaming and throwing things as soon as he walked in the door.

So we had to make a change.

The problem I am having is with OT's. In theory, I love these people. They should have so many answers to so many of our problems! I haven't been able to find one to work with my ds. Partly, the problem is that he is "aspie on the edges." He shuts down when things get too hard. He's failed so much that he is more apt to give up and preserve whatever dignity he has left. But he will try until he decides you are making fun of him or calling him "stupid." That's natural. But he is more likely to shut down than the average kid although it does take a bit of effort to tick him off that much.

The school OT's never helped. He got OT in school off and on. They could tell he had trouble tracking with his eyes, for instance, but never had any clue what to do to help him work on that. Then the last eval they did, the OT did not even use his correct age to determine his scores (which were already poor enough) and kept saying handwriting was not important. The e-school of course, has to contract to private therapists for kids who need therapy. So he has one hour per week of OT. The first OT we saw did the new evaluation and she wrote a really good report and really got the problems he was having. I was elated. We worked to get the new school to let us see this one specifically. I did not realize she was also a Naturopath. She spent the whole hour long session "healing" his inner self. Very little fine motor work or help with visual alignment issues. Just a lot of hocus pocus

(hold these, snap, it's all gone). I went anyway because we really need help with some of this stuff. And maybe she could help - her report was great! She did have some good ideas as well. So I tried to keep an open mind to see where it was going. But it wasn't working. She had him in tears finally one day as she tried to "erase a bad memory" and it was just so not OT. He refused to go back and I agreed it was not going to help to keep doing that sort of thing.

So we switched to another OT that the school found. She has been not so great so far. She isn't doing anything weird but she isn't doing anything else. She has decided he should "notice" he's not leaving spaces between words and that will fix the problem. Only that is the problem. He can tell his writing is a mess just fine. He just can't make it better. I thought that would be her job - to do activities to improve his skills in these areas so he could notice these things and improve. But instead, her method seems to be, "He should just pay better attention and he won't have that problem." she makes him write paragraphs from a book - he has the worst time copying from things and hates doing it - and then she goes through it and nit picks at everything he has messed up. It's really defeating for him. And then she says, "Should there be a space between those words?" and he visibly looks like

he wants to throw up on her. I know he is thinking, "Duh!" and feeling like she is talking down to him. He's not stupid and he knows this is a problem. But spacing is a problem he can't seem to figure out on his own....hence the OT!! Then the more she talks to him, the worse he feels, the more he refuses to cooperate or even speak to her and the more she decides he's just being obstinate and could do it if he just wanted to, so she talks more and pushes more, repeating this awful ugly circle for the whole hour long session. This week, for instance, I have a card I am supposed to place next to him when he writes things. It lists the 3 things he needs to "fix" with his writing and I thought, "If all it takes to fix this problem is to nag him about it, I can do that on my own!" lol) I guess I thought she would have exercises to do to improve his skills.

I told her I didn't agree that this was something he could fix if he wanted to. She explained to me that when we hurry when we write, it comes out sloppy and that is what he is doing. I didn't even agree because I can write quickly and neatly at the same time. So I am not seeing how this "theory" holds water. But I said that was not really a problem he has. He's always had these issues of spacing whether he takes his time writing or writes quickly - and so do my other two ds's. I don't feel it's just laziness on his part. But she really implied that it was. I asked if there were not activities we could do to work on these skills (i.e. something even FUN?? Dare I say fun?) and she didn't answer me. She just repeated that he needs to "pay attention" when he is writing. I get the idea that OT is going to be a long dreary hour of making him write and then telling him it looks awful. Even

if her method was a good one, it isn't working with my ds who is missing the point.

This takes 3 hours. I drive almost an hour to get there, an hour in the therapy, an hour home. Then he is so ticked off he refuses to even speak to me. So any more schooling on these days is impossible. It's a wasted day.

Somehow, I feel defeated. How many OT's do you have to go through to find one that is even passable and can work with this kid? I have a short list to discuss with her this next week in the hopes of salvaging the situation and have already read two books on visual perception to try and educate myself more about what he needs. But I'm not feeling confident that this is going to go well. I hope I am wrong. We'll see. Do you think the school will think we are just nit-picky people if we have to find yet another OT to work with him? Or should I give up and just figure out what things we can do on our own? Aren't these people supposed to be trained to work with kids just like this? WAAAAAAAAHHH!!!

Has anyone else had to go through a series of therapists like this? How many did you go through before finding a real one? And is it worth it to take the kid to so many with so many failures? I am feeling like he is not going to even go to a new one at this point, he is so done with this nonsense. And frankly, I AM TOO!!!

I am probably just venting here. It's just so frustrating to get to this point where I should be seeing my kid get help and not getting help. And wasting another year. Argh!!

Roxanna

â€œOur lives begin to end the day we

become silent about things that matter.â€ - Luther King, Jr.

February 6, 2011

My complaint of OT's is that they try to cover too many areas

in one short 45 minute session.

For us having the OT (any OT) focus on bi-lateral coordination

only for 30m minutes and then give our daughter as a reward 15 minutes to pick

what she likes to do (jump in ball pit, swing etc) made

a noticeable difference.

We only went to OT from age 5 - 9 and only in the summer for 8 weeks

(this reduced her opposition to going).

The OT's pointed out so many deficits it was just too much

and I spent so much money on vision therapy, listening programs,

fine motor skills, brushing programs etc.

I think the money spent on working on large motor skills

was worth the money. But we had to follow up with swimming,

biking and roller skating (all bi-lateral skills).

Pam

February 6, 2011

Hi Roxanne,You are way farther in this process than me but here are my thoughts.Most of our kids have pretty messy writing and from what I understand it doesn't improve very much after a certain age.It also sounds like this OT is trying to help a visual processing disorder with nagging.I would get rid of her and find another!Good luck! Careyhttp://www.GreenDiaperStore.comSent via BlackBerry from T-MobileFrom: Roxanna <MadIdeas@...>Sender: Date: Sun, 6 Feb 2011 08:58:44 -0500 (EST)< >Reply Subject: ( ) Argh! Happy Super Bowl Sunday everyone! I am having a life here. My youngest ds has dyslexia. He is "aspie on the edges" but that's kind of a family trait here. He is 11 yo and in 5th grade. He's smart enough to get by a lot of things and that is one reason it was so hard to get his dyslexia taken seriously at the school. He was always spotted for extra help, tutoring, fast forword, etc. He was RtI'd to death. But then once he got some help, he'd improve that much and they'd stop helping, where he'd continue to fall behind from there. For instance, his need to learn to read only mattered until he got good enough to pass the state test (by 4 points!). Granted, it took three years to get to there. lol. Then he went from needing help to "being lazy." Finally, we pulled him out and e-school him since the first quarter of 4th grade. He was coming home screaming and throwing things as soon as he walked in the door. So we had to make a change.The problem I am having is with OT's. In theory, I love these people. They should have so many answers to so many of our problems! I haven't been able to find one to work with my ds. Partly, the problem is that he is "aspie on the edges." He shuts down when things get too hard. He's failed so much that he is more apt to give up and preserve whatever dignity he has left. But he will try until he decides you are making fun of him or calling him "stupid." That's natural. But he is more likely to shut down than the average kid although it does take a bit of effort to tick him off that much. The school OT's never helped. He got OT in school off and on. They could tell he had trouble tracking with his eyes, for instance, but never had any clue what to do to help him work on that. Then the last eval they did, the OT did not even use his correct age to determine his scores (which were already poor enough) and kept saying handwriting was not important. The e-school of course, has to contract to private therapists for kids who need therapy. So he has one hour per week of OT. The first OT we saw did the new evaluation and she wrote a really good report and really got the problems he was having. I was elated. We worked to get the new school to let us see this one specifically. I did not realize she was also a Naturopath. She spent the whole hour long session "healing" his inner self. Very little fine motor work or help with visual alignment issues. Just a lot of hocus pocus (hold these, snap, it's all gone). I went anyway because we really need help with some of this stuff. And maybe she could help - her report was great! She did have some good ideas as well. So I tried to keep an open mind to see where it was going. But it wasn't working. She had him in tears finally one day as she tried to "erase a bad memory" and it was just so not OT. He refused to go back and I agreed it was not going to help to keep doing that sort of thing. So we switched to another OT that the school found. She has been not so great so far. She isn't doing anything weird but she isn't doing anything else. She has decided he should "notice" he's not leaving spaces between words and that will fix the problem. Only that is the problem. He can tell his writing is a mess just fine. He just can't make it better. I thought that would be her job - to do activities to improve his skills in these areas so he could notice these things and improve. But instead, her method seems to be, "He should just pay better attention and he won't have that problem." she makes him write paragraphs from a book - he has the worst time copying from things and hates doing it - and then she goes through it and nit picks at everything he has messed up. It's really defeating for him. And then she says, "Should there be a space between those words?" and he visibly looks like he wants to throw up on her. I know he is thinking, "Duh!" and feeling like she is talking down to him. He's not stupid and he knows this is a problem. But spacing is a problem he can't seem to figure out on his own....hence the OT!! Then the more she talks to him, the worse he feels, the more he refuses to cooperate or even speak to her and the more she decides he's just being obstinate and could do it if he just wanted to, so she talks more and pushes more, repeating this awful ugly circle for the whole hour long session. This week, for instance, I have a card I am supposed to place next to him when he writes things. It lists the 3 things he needs to "fix" with his writing and I thought, "If all it takes to fix this problem is to nag him about it, I can do that on my own!" lol) I guess I thought she would have exercises to do to improve his skills. I told her I didn't agree that this was something he could fix if he wanted to. She explained to me that when we hurry when we write, it comes out sloppy and that is what he is doing. I didn't even agree because I can write quickly and neatly at the same time. So I am not seeing how this "theory" holds water. But I said that was not really a problem he has. He's always had these issues of spacing whether he takes his time writing or writes quickly - and so do my other two ds's. I don't feel it's just laziness on his part. But she really implied that it was. I asked if there were not activities we could do to work on these skills (i.e. something even FUN?? Dare I say fun?) and she didn't answer me. She just repeated that he needs to "pay attention" when he is writing. I get the idea that OT is going to be a long dreary hour of making him write and then telling him it looks awful. Even if her method was a good one, it isn't working with my ds who is missing the point.This takes 3 hours. I drive almost an hour to get there, an hour in the therapy, an hour home. Then he is so ticked off he refuses to even speak to me. So any more schooling on these days is impossible. It's a wasted day. Somehow, I feel defeated. How many OT's do you have to go through to find one that is even passable and can work with this kid? I have a short list to discuss with her this next week in the hopes of salvaging the situation and have already read two books on visual perception to try and educate myself more about what he needs. But I'm not feeling confident that this is going to go well. I hope I am wrong. We'll see. Do you think the school will think we are just nit-picky people if we have to find yet another OT to work with him? Or should I give up and just figure out what things we can do on our own? Aren't these people supposed to be trained to work with kids just like this? WAAAAAAAAHHH!!!Has anyone else had to go through a series of therapists like this? How many did you go through before finding a real one? And is it worth it to take the kid to so many with so many failures? I am feeling like he is not going to even go to a new one at this point, he is so done with this nonsense. And frankly, I AM TOO!!! I am probably just venting here. It's just so frustrating to get to this point where I should be seeing my kid get help and not getting help. And wasting another year. Argh!! Roxannaâ€œOur lives begin to end the day webecome silent about things that matter.â€ - Luther King, Jr.

February 6, 2011

My son has always had difficulty leaving spaces between words. Has anyone found

a solution to it? On and off OT has not helped.

>

> Happy Super Bowl Sunday everyone!

>

> I am having a life here. My youngest ds has dyslexia. He is " aspie on the

edges " but that's kind of a family trait here. He is 11 yo and in 5th grade.

He's smart enough to get by a lot of things and that is one reason it was so

hard to get his dyslexia taken seriously at the school. He was always spotted

for extra help, tutoring, fast forword, etc. He was RtI'd to death. But then

once he got some help, he'd improve that much and they'd stop helping, where

he'd continue to fall behind from there. For instance, his need to learn to

read only mattered until he got good enough to pass the state test (by 4

points!). Granted, it took three years to get to there. lol. Then he went

from needing help to " being lazy. " Finally, we pulled him out and e-school him

since the first quarter of 4th grade. He was coming home screaming and throwing

things as soon as he walked in the door. So we had to make a change.

>

> The problem I am having is with OT's. In theory, I love these people. They

should have so many answers to so many of our problems! I haven't been able to

find one to work with my ds. Partly, the problem is that he is " aspie on the

edges. " He shuts down when things get too hard. He's failed so much that he is

more apt to give up and preserve whatever dignity he has left. But he will try

until he decides you are making fun of him or calling him " stupid. " That's

natural. But he is more likely to shut down than the average kid although it

does take a bit of effort to tick him off that much.

>

> The school OT's never helped. He got OT in school off and on. They could

tell he had trouble tracking with his eyes, for instance, but never had any clue

what to do to help him work on that. Then the last eval they did, the OT did

not even use his correct age to determine his scores (which were already poor

enough) and kept saying handwriting was not important. The e-school of course,

has to contract to private therapists for kids who need therapy. So he has one

hour per week of OT. The first OT we saw did the new evaluation and she wrote a

really good report and really got the problems he was having. I was elated. We

worked to get the new school to let us see this one specifically. I did not

realize she was also a Naturopath. She spent the whole hour long session

" healing " his inner self. Very little fine motor work or help with visual

alignment issues. Just a lot of hocus pocus (hold these, snap, it's all gone).

I went anyway because we really need help with some of this stuff. And maybe

she could help - her report was great! She did have some good ideas as well.

So I tried to keep an open mind to see where it was going. But it wasn't

working. She had him in tears finally one day as she tried to " erase a bad

memory " and it was just so not OT. He refused to go back and I agreed it was

not going to help to keep doing that sort of thing.

>

> So we switched to another OT that the school found. She has been not so great

so far. She isn't doing anything weird but she isn't doing anything else. She

has decided he should " notice " he's not leaving spaces between words and that

will fix the problem. Only that is the problem. He can tell his writing is a

mess just fine. He just can't make it better. I thought that would be her job

- to do activities to improve his skills in these areas so he could notice these

things and improve. But instead, her method seems to be, " He should just pay

better attention and he won't have that problem. " she makes him write

paragraphs from a book - he has the worst time copying from things and hates

doing it - and then she goes through it and nit picks at everything he has

messed up. It's really defeating for him. And then she says, " Should there be

a space between those words? " and he visibly looks like he wants to throw up on

her. I know he is thinking, " Duh! " and feeling like she is talking down to him.

He's not stupid and he knows this is a problem. But spacing is a problem he

can't seem to figure out on his own....hence the OT!! Then the more she talks

to him, the worse he feels, the more he refuses to cooperate or even speak to

her and the more she decides he's just being obstinate and could do it if he

just wanted to, so she talks more and pushes more, repeating this awful ugly

circle for the whole hour long session. This week, for instance, I have a card

I am supposed to place next to him when he writes things. It lists the 3 things

he needs to " fix " with his writing and I thought, " If all it takes to fix this

problem is to nag him about it, I can do that on my own! " lol) I guess I

thought she would have exercises to do to improve his skills.

>

> I told her I didn't agree that this was something he could fix if he wanted

to. She explained to me that when we hurry when we write, it comes out sloppy

and that is what he is doing. I didn't even agree because I can write quickly

and neatly at the same time. So I am not seeing how this " theory " holds water.

But I said that was not really a problem he has. He's always had these issues

of spacing whether he takes his time writing or writes quickly - and so do my

other two ds's. I don't feel it's just laziness on his part. But she really

implied that it was. I asked if there were not activities we could do to work

on these skills (i.e. something even FUN?? Dare I say fun?) and she didn't

answer me. She just repeated that he needs to " pay attention " when he is

writing. I get the idea that OT is going to be a long dreary hour of making him

write and then telling him it looks awful. Even if her method was a good one,

it isn't working with my ds who is missing the point.

>

> This takes 3 hours. I drive almost an hour to get there, an hour in the

therapy, an hour home. Then he is so ticked off he refuses to even speak to me.

So any more schooling on these days is impossible. It's a wasted day.

>

> Somehow, I feel defeated. How many OT's do you have to go through to find one

that is even passable and can work with this kid? I have a short list to

discuss with her this next week in the hopes of salvaging the situation and have

already read two books on visual perception to try and educate myself more about

what he needs. But I'm not feeling confident that this is going to go well. I

hope I am wrong. We'll see. Do you think the school will think we are just

nit-picky people if we have to find yet another OT to work with him? Or should

I give up and just figure out what things we can do on our own? Aren't these

people supposed to be trained to work with kids just like this? WAAAAAAAAHHH!!!

>

> Has anyone else had to go through a series of therapists like this? How many

did you go through before finding a real one? And is it worth it to take the

kid to so many with so many failures? I am feeling like he is not going to even

go to a new one at this point, he is so done with this nonsense. And frankly, I

AM TOO!!!

>

> I am probably just venting here. It's just so frustrating to get to this

point where I should be seeing my kid get help and not getting help. And

wasting another year. Argh!!

>

> Roxanna

> â€œOur lives begin to end the day webecome silent about things that matter.â€

- Luther King, Jr.

>

February 6, 2011

Happy Superbowl Sunday to you too Roxanna!

Remember what you said to me one time. It's ok to vent! That is what we "the group" are here for. And anyway, you rarely vent. You're usually the one giving everyone else advice. You've definitely given me some.

I've not had the issue you have with OT because we've never had OT services even though my son was assessed in the second grade. But we have had this issue with psychotherapists. Some just are so condesending that my son picks up on it and doesn't like them. He will even tell them he doesn't like them. Which doesn't help when they are suppose to get him to talk about his feelings. LOL!

But I wouldn't worry about them thinking you're picky. You have to find someone that your son will respond to and that knows what the hell they're doing for one. With our kids it is typical for them to shut down if they feel that the person is treating them like they're stupid or if the person doesn't like them. My son can pick up on it right away and he will shut down and nothing will help. So you need to find someone that your son can make a connection with. This is key with our kids for any kind of therapy.

Have you had your son tested for assistive technology? We did because our son had similar issues and also because he scored in the 7th percentile in written expression. He now has a word processor or computer written into his IEP to use as needed. That way he can consentrate on the quality of what he is writing and not have to focus so much on the mechanics of it.

Well dear, good luck and like to told me one time, don't feel bad about venting. ;-)ne

From: Roxanna <MadIdeas@...>Subject: ( ) Argh! Date: Sunday, February 6, 2011, 8:58 AM

Happy Super Bowl Sunday everyone! I am having a life here. My youngest ds has dyslexia. He is "aspie on the edges" but that's kind of a family trait here. He is 11 yo and in 5th grade. He's smart enough to get by a lot of things and that is one reason it was so hard to get his dyslexia taken seriously at the school. He was always spotted for extra help, tutoring, fast forword, etc. He was RtI'd to death. But then once he got some help, he'd improve that much and they'd stop helping, where he'd continue to fall behind from there. For instance, his need to learn to read only mattered until he got good enough to pass the state test (by 4 points!). Granted, it took three years to get to there. lol. Then he went from needing help to "being lazy." Finally, we pulled him out and e-school him since the first quarter of 4th grade. He was coming home screaming and

throwing things as soon as he walked in the door. So we had to make a change.The problem I am having is with OT's. In theory, I love these people. They should have so many answers to so many of our problems! I haven't been able to find one to work with my ds. Partly, the problem is that he is "aspie on the edges." He shuts down when things get too hard. He's failed so much that he is more apt to give up and preserve whatever dignity he has left. But he will try until he decides you are making fun of him or calling him "stupid." That's natural. But he is more likely to shut down than the average kid although it does take a bit of effort to tick him off that much. The school OT's never helped. He got OT in school off and on. They could tell he had trouble tracking with his eyes, for instance, but never had any clue what to do to help him work on that. Then

the last eval they did, the OT did not even use his correct age to determine his scores (which were already poor enough) and kept saying handwriting was not important. The e-school of course, has to contract to private therapists for kids who need therapy. So he has one hour per week of OT. The first OT we saw did the new evaluation and she wrote a really good report and really got the problems he was having. I was elated. We worked to get the new school to let us see this one specifically. I did not realize she was also a Naturopath. She spent the whole hour long session "healing" his inner self. Very little fine motor work or help with visual alignment issues. Just a lot of hocus pocus (hold these, snap, it's all gone). I went anyway because we really need help with some of this stuff. And maybe she could help - her report was great! She did have some good ideas as well. So

I tried to keep an open mind to see where it was going. But it wasn't working. She had him in tears finally one day as she tried to "erase a bad memory" and it was just so not OT. He refused to go back and I agreed it was not going to help to keep doing that sort of thing. So we switched to another OT that the school found. She has been not so great so far. She isn't doing anything weird but she isn't doing anything else. She has decided he should "notice" he's not leaving spaces between words and that will fix the problem. Only that is the problem. He can tell his writing is a mess just fine. He just can't make it better. I thought that would be her job - to do activities to improve his skills in these areas so he could notice these things and improve. But instead, her method seems to be, "He should just pay better attention and he won't have that problem." she makes

him write paragraphs from a book - he has the worst time copying from things and hates doing it - and then she goes through it and nit picks at everything he has messed up. It's really defeating for him. And then she says, "Should there be a space between those words?" and he visibly looks like he wants to throw up on her. I know he is thinking, "Duh!" and feeling like she is talking down to him. He's not stupid and he knows this is a problem. But spacing is a problem he can't seem to figure out on his own....hence the OT!! Then the more she talks to him, the worse he feels, the more he refuses to cooperate or even speak to her and the more she decides he's just being obstinate and could do it if he just wanted to, so she talks more and pushes more, repeating this awful ugly circle for the whole hour long session. This week, for instance, I have a card I am supposed to place next to him when he writes

things. It lists the 3 things he needs to "fix" with his writing and I thought, "If all it takes to fix this problem is to nag him about it, I can do that on my own!" lol) I guess I thought she would have exercises to do to improve his skills. I told her I didn't agree that this was something he could fix if he wanted to. She explained to me that when we hurry when we write, it comes out sloppy and that is what he is doing. I didn't even agree because I can write quickly and neatly at the same time. So I am not seeing how this "theory" holds water. But I said that was not really a problem he has. He's always had these issues of spacing whether he takes his time writing or writes quickly - and so do my other two ds's. I don't feel it's just laziness on his part. But she really implied that it was. I asked if there were not activities we could do to work on these skills (i.e.

something even FUN?? Dare I say fun?) and she didn't answer me. She just repeated that he needs to "pay attention" when he is writing. I get the idea that OT is going to be a long dreary hour of making him write and then telling him it looks awful. Even if her method was a good one, it isn't working with my ds who is missing the point.This takes 3 hours. I drive almost an hour to get there, an hour in the therapy, an hour home. Then he is so ticked off he refuses to even speak to me. So any more schooling on these days is impossible. It's a wasted day. Somehow, I feel defeated. How many OT's do you have to go through to find one that is even passable and can work with this kid? I have a short list to discuss with her this next week in the hopes of salvaging the situation and have already read two books on visual perception to try and educate myself more about what he

needs. But I'm not feeling confident that this is going to go well. I hope I am wrong. We'll see. Do you think the school will think we are just nit-picky people if we have to find yet another OT to work with him? Or should I give up and just figure out what things we can do on our own? Aren't these people supposed to be trained to work with kids just like this? WAAAAAAAAHHH!!!Has anyone else had to go through a series of therapists like this? How many did you go through before finding a real one? And is it worth it to take the kid to so many with so many failures? I am feeling like he is not going to even go to a new one at this point, he is so done with this nonsense. And frankly, I AM TOO!!! I am probably just venting here. It's just so frustrating to get to this point where I should be seeing my kid get help and not getting help. And wasting another

year. Argh!!

Roxannaâ€œOur lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.â€ - Luther King, Jr.

February 6, 2011

Happy Birthday ! I bet it would be a nice day to go to the mall. lol. I'm bumming a bit because my dh is working this weekend at the sleep lab. So I am here, watching the super bowl all alone. It's not as much fun. And the halftime show was so bad. lol. My ds screamed, "Turn that awful music off!!" from the other room.

You are right, it isn't worth his self esteem, which is so fragile right now. He has dyslexia as well and we struggle with math a lot!!!!! One of his OT goals is about math - writing his problems correctly. He mixes the numbers up, subtracts going up instead of down, etc. The OT's have not helped him at all with this and having to do the math with them has been like torture for him.

He can read fairly well now actually. We worked so hard for many years and it seems to have paid off. He had two teachers who specialized in orton gillingham also so that really helped. I think he can read better than he scores on testing but his score goes lower due to comprehension problems.

My ds really does almost nothing with writing right now. Since he e-schools, all his stuff is online or on the computer. So he types everything. When he does his math, I am walking him through everything and I write it for him because he can't line it up or write small enough to use paper. I want to make him more independent but this OT isn't helping us get there and you are right - it is making it worse. Thanks for helping me think it through!

Roxanna

â€œOur lives begin to end the day we

become silent about things that matter.â€ - Luther King, Jr.

( ) Argh!