Re: New to Group - 16 yo dd w/Aspergers

[Guest guest]

,

there are many options....

1. Would your daughter accept having a paraprofessional work with her all day? I think this would help her a lot.

2. Her projects could be modified and/or she could have a longer time frame to hand them in.

3. She could get study guides to help her.

4. I think the social skills group would be helpful...teaching social skills is very very difficult

5. The lunch buddy group sounds great

How does your daughter do with transitions ...changes? She may need help in that area too.

Does she work with a therapist now? This may help.

You have a lot of options available to you...just not sure what she needs.

Jan

"In the Midst of Difficulty lies Opportunity" Albert Einstein

Success is not measured by one's position but by the obstacles one has overcome to obtain that position

From: <hollynme@...> Sent: Sat, October 2, 2010 1:55:32 PMSubject: ( ) New to Group - 16 yo dd w/Aspergers

Hi everyone,I just joined this group yesterday. On Thursday, we had our first IEP meeting where they told us that after testing her towards the end of last year that she has aspergers. They said that she does not pick up on social cues and that some of her teachers this year and last year says that she is very child like in her choice of conversations.She has a full schedule with a zero period, which means she has seven classes and she gets to school an hour earlier than most (6:40 a.m.).What they offered her is one of the following:1. Do nothing.2. Social Skills class in her schedule which means she will have to drop one of her classes (she enjoys all of her classes) and it will rearrange her entire schedule and new people in all of her classes in order to make it fit.3. Let her go to Tuesday Lunch Bunch just to hang out with the other kids in the special ed program.4. I did ask about her projects at the

end of the year and explained that she is usually overwhelmed with the amount of projects due in a short period of time and they said that we could ask and receive her assignments earlier and due in chunks or blocks so not to overwhelm her.She is getting straight As except for in Spanish III. Apparently there is still time to level down in a subject so I am going to ask for her to level down to Spanish II.If she adds the social skills class, the class will also show up on her transcript as a Learning Skills class and I am not sure how that will look on her college applications. I am not sure if it will even matter.I am thinking that perhaps I could ask if she could perhaps meet with the social skills teacher once or twice a week during one of her electives or during spanish II class since she has already taken spanish II. She seems to get stressed out in class when kids bother her. She wants to leave.They said

that she goes to the bathroom a lot but rather than come right back to class she looks for someone that she can talk to.She tells everyone everything and gets excited about things that her peers would not get excited about.Is there any suggestions that you might have for me. I have no idea of what my options are for her.I have heard people say "Get an advocate!" Is that something the school provides or do I have to pay for this? I am a single mother. I do not have the funds to hire anyone.Her dad asked in the meeting if there are outside social skills that she could go to after school and they said, "No". They said that there are sources within the community but they do not communicate with the teacher and they are fee based and the school will not pay for them. It seems like they put all asperger kids in this particular class and I do not see the Individuality in this. It is my understanding that the I in IEP is

to meet her individual needs.What do you recommend or suggest? or what have you found in the high school level that might work well.Thank you so much.A single aspie raising an aspie! (I am sure I have aspergers as well!)

[Guest guest]

Janice,

What do you mean a paraprofessional work with her all day? What would that

entail? Would that be someone that goes to her classes with her? If so, no,

she doesn't want the other kids to know.

She likes the idea of having a longer time to hand things in.

She said her teachers already give her study guides for the tests.

She said that she will go to the Lunch meeting not this Tuesday because it is

Club Rush and she really wants to be involved with school. She has tried for

the last seven years to get in student government, newspaper, or yearbook and

they will never let her. It is very disappointing for her but she never stops

trying. Next year she will be a Senior.

She doesn't work with a therapist. She doesn't want to just talk to someone.

She says that she is fine the way that she is. She has very high self esteem

which is good, I think.

Do you think it would be reasonable to suggest that she meets with the social

skills teacher during her electives rather than making it a class period? At

least especially for this semester since she is doing well and she is getting

good grades?

Thank you so much.

>

> ,

>

> there are many options....

>

> 1. Would your daughter accept having a paraprofessional work with her all day?

I

> think this would help her a lot.

> 2. Her projects could be modified and/or she could have a longer time frame

to

> hand them in.

> 3. She could get study guides to help her.

> 4. I think the social skills group would be helpful...teaching social skills

is

> very very difficult

> 5. The lunch buddy group sounds great

>

> How does your daughter do with transitions ...changes?  She may need help

in

> that area too.

> Does she work with a therapist now? This may help.

>

> You have a lot of options available to you...just not sure what she needs.

>

> Jan

>  

> " In the Midst of Difficulty lies Opportunity "     Albert Einstein

>  

> Success is not measured by one's position but by the obstacles one has

overcome

> to obtain that position

>

>

>

>

> ________________________________

> From: <hollynme@...>

>

> Sent: Sat, October 2, 2010 1:55:32 PM

> Subject: ( ) New to Group - 16 yo dd w/Aspergers

>

>  

> Hi everyone,

>

> I just joined this group yesterday. On Thursday, we had our first IEP meeting

> where they told us that after testing her towards the end of last year that

she

> has aspergers. They said that she does not pick up on social cues and that

some

> of her teachers this year and last year says that she is very child like in

her

> choice of conversations.

>

> She has a full schedule with a zero period, which means she has seven classes

> and she gets to school an hour earlier than most (6:40 a.m.).

>

> What they offered her is one of the following:

>

> 1. Do nothing.

> 2. Social Skills class in her schedule which means she will have to drop one

of

> her classes (she enjoys all of her classes) and it will rearrange her entire

> schedule and new people in all of her classes in order to make it fit.

> 3. Let her go to Tuesday Lunch Bunch just to hang out with the other kids in

the

> special ed program.

> 4. I did ask about her projects at the end of the year and explained that she

is

> usually overwhelmed with the amount of projects due in a short period of time

> and they said that we could ask and receive her assignments earlier and due in

> chunks or blocks so not to overwhelm her.

>

> She is getting straight As except for in Spanish III. Apparently there is

still

> time to level down in a subject so I am going to ask for her to level down to

> Spanish II.

>

> If she adds the social skills class, the class will also show up on her

> transcript as a Learning Skills class and I am not sure how that will look on

> her college applications. I am not sure if it will even matter.

>

> I am thinking that perhaps I could ask if she could perhaps meet with the

social

> skills teacher once or twice a week during one of her electives or during

> spanish II class since she has already taken spanish II.

>

>

> She seems to get stressed out in class when kids bother her. She wants to

leave.

>

> They said that she goes to the bathroom a lot but rather than come right back

to

> class she looks for someone that she can talk to.

>

> She tells everyone everything and gets excited about things that her peers

would

> not get excited about.

>

> Is there any suggestions that you might have for me. I have no idea of what my

> options are for her.

>

> I have heard people say " Get an advocate! " Is that something the school

provides

> or do I have to pay for this? I am a single mother. I do not have the funds to

> hire anyone.

>

> Her dad asked in the meeting if there are outside social skills that she could

> go to after school and they said, " No " . They said that there are sources

within

> the community but they do not communicate with the teacher and they are fee

> based and the school will not pay for them.

>

>

> It seems like they put all asperger kids in this particular class and I do not

> see the Individuality in this. It is my understanding that the I in IEP is to

> meet her individual needs.

>

> What do you recommend or suggest? or what have you found in the high school

> level that might work well.

>

> Thank you so much.

>

> A single aspie raising an aspie! (I am sure I have aspergers as well!)

>

[Guest guest]

You do need an advocate.I have never paid for an advocate nor a lawyer and in the 10 years my aspie angel has attended school in 3 states so find 2 support groups and ask the leaders and attendees (parents).She should have a classroom she can go to throughout the day and it needs to be in her IEP.Lunch Bunch is great and we used it. I wish all schools had it. We had it where my son would take his lunch (homemade) into the library with a friend of his choice and they would eat lunch quietly, then straighten a bookshelf they each adopted and then play chess or another quiet game of their choice.I am not sure why this would go on her transcript.HthRobyn-- Sent from my Palm PreOn Oct 2, 2010 21:55, <hollynme@...> wrote:

Hi everyone,

I just joined this group yesterday. On Thursday, we had our first IEP meeting where they told us that after testing her towards the end of last year that she has aspergers. They said that she does not pick up on social cues and that some of her teachers this year and last year says that she is very child like in her choice of conversations.

She has a full schedule with a zero period, which means she has seven classes and she gets to school an hour earlier than most (6:40 a.m.).

What they offered her is one of the following:

1. Do nothing.

2. Social Skills class in her schedule which means she will have to drop one of her classes (she enjoys all of her classes) and it will rearrange her entire schedule and new people in all of her classes in order to make it fit.

3. Let her go to Tuesday Lunch Bunch just to hang out with the other kids in the special ed program.

4. I did ask about her projects at the end of the year and explained that she is usually overwhelmed with the amount of projects due in a short period of time and they said that we could ask and receive her assignments earlier and due in chunks or blocks so not to overwhelm her.

She is getting straight As except for in Spanish III. Apparently there is still time to level down in a subject so I am going to ask for her to level down to Spanish II.

If she adds the social skills class, the class will also show up on her transcript as a Learning Skills class and I am not sure how that will look on her college applications. I am not sure if it will even matter.

I am thinking that perhaps I could ask if she could perhaps meet with the social skills teacher once or twice a week during one of her electives or during spanish II class since she has already taken spanish II.

She seems to get stressed out in class when kids bother her. She wants to leave.

They said that she goes to the bathroom a lot but rather than come right back to class she looks for someone that she can talk to.

She tells everyone everything and gets excited about things that her peers would not get excited about.

Is there any suggestions that you might have for me. I have no idea of what my options are for her.

I have heard people say "Get an advocate!" Is that something the school provides or do I have to pay for this? I am a single mother. I do not have the funds to hire anyone.

Her dad asked in the meeting if there are outside social skills that she could go to after school and they said, "No". They said that there are sources within the community but they do not communicate with the teacher and they are fee based and the school will not pay for them.

It seems like they put all asperger kids in this particular class and I do not see the Individuality in this. It is my understanding that the I in IEP is to meet her individual needs.

What do you recommend or suggest? or what have you found in the high school level that might work well.

Thank you so much.

A single aspie raising an aspie! (I am sure I have aspergers as well!)

[Guest guest]

What do you mean when other kids bother her in class? Are they teasing her or is

she just over whelmed? The school should allow her to go to the counselors

office for a break during these times. And if it's teasing then the school

should take action to stop it.

Based on your description of your daughter a social skills group may help her to

develop better conversational skills, learn how to filter and begin to help her

read social cues. Most social skills classes are more a learning process (lab

for lack of a better term) where the teacher may discuss a certain topic then

have the kids either demonstrate it or identify it during their conversations.

It's basically a safe place to practice and learn social skills while dealing

with your peers. So just meeting the social skills teacher wouldn't be a great

benefit.

Lunch bunch may be a good thing. Usually there may be a adult to help facilitate

the conversation.

One book that was recommended to us for my son was Socially Curious and

Curiously Social by Winner. You can buy it on

www.socialthinking.com. My son has found this book very helpful.

Does your daughter need the Spanish class to graduate? If not then why not drop

it altogether and give her a study period. My son was overwhelmed by a 7 period

day in ms. We found by giving him a study hall to start on home work or finish

class work took a lot of pressure off of him. His hs follows a semester schedule

so he only has 4 classes to deal with at a time.

Caroline

[Guest guest]

Hi , I think the Lunch Bunch sounds a good option for her to try. And the

accommodation for her projects. I wouldn't want to change her classes around

either to get in the Social Skills class.

Why, or how, are kids in class bothering her so that she needs to leave? That

needs to be addressed. And perhaps you can have in her IEP that at times she

needs to leave due to her stress/anxiety, a stated place she can go -- a safe

place; like library or someone's office that is always available (counselor,

school nurse...). And some way that she is to let the teacher know when she

needs to leave, or can she just get up and go....

Can she take Spanish II again if she already had it? Good idea to see if the

social skills teacher is available during one of the electives, perhaps during

this class.

Any way to get her schedule changed around for next semester to fit in the

Social Skills class then?

Parents usually get an advocate when they are having problems with the school

not meeting their child's needs, denying some services, etc.

single mom, 3 sons

, 21, with Aspergers, OCD, dysgraphia

>

> Hi everyone,

>

> I just joined this group yesterday. On Thursday, we had our first IEP meeting

where they told us that after testing her towards the end of last year that she

has aspergers. They said that she does not pick up on social cues and that some

of her teachers this year and

[Guest guest]

I think that the lunch bunch sounds good - especially if there are other AS kids

in the group. When my son found other kids that were of the same tribe as him -

They became his friends. They " got " him and so he felt accepted. A social skills

class that meets every day is much better than something that meets only now and

then. Don't worry what the social skills class will look like on a college

transcript. If your daughter doesn't get help now, she may not make it to

college at all. Ask around for an advocate to help you at the IEP meetings.

Some states offer advocate service for free. I really recommend not going into

the IEP meetings by yourself. It really makes a difference to know that you are

with someone who really is on your daughter's side and who knows the laws.

[Guest guest]

She is getting straight As right now so I hate to disrupt her schedule and have her move her classes around. I think I will have her start the Lunch Bunch next Tuesday and then she can take the social skills class next semester. Sent via BlackBerry by AT&TFrom: "" <tamaoki_s@...>Sender: Date: Mon, 04 Oct 2010 21:59:34 -0000< >Reply Subject: Re: ( ) New to Group - 16 yo dd w/Aspergers I think that the lunch bunch sounds good - especially if there are other AS kids in the group. When my son found other kids that were of the same tribe as him - They became his friends. They " got " him and so he felt accepted. A social skills class that meets every day is much better than something that meets only now and then. Don't worry what the social skills class will look like on a college transcript. If your daughter doesn't get help now, she may not make it to college at all. Ask around for an advocate to help you at the IEP meetings. Some states offer advocate service for free. I really recommend not going into the IEP meetings by yourself. It really makes a difference to know that you are with someone who really is on your daughter's side and who knows the laws.