[SPAM] Re: Adult Aspies

[Guest guest]



My dd's middle school implemented a new program called "check and connect". there is one teacher that is assigned children who need extra help, my dd being one of them. This teacher checks in with my dd daily (either at the beginning of her day or towards the end) and makes sure she has all info, books, planner etc..to successfully complete her day or the next day. its seems to be working very well.

Lynne Bankswww.americanadoptioncongress.orgSouth Dakota State Representative

www.adoptionscams.netAsk me how to protect yourself from being scammed in adoption!

[sPAM] Re: ( ) Adult Aspies

Whoooo that is a dilly of a pickle. Our oldest is in middle school too, but she has no issues developmentally and she is VERY mature and responsible for an 11 year old! That being said, we hadn't had any issues at all with her changing classes, etc. because she adjusted so well. Now, when our 8 year old gets to middle school, I am going to be in the same position you are! I KNOW that B. won't be able to handle the class changes, remembering books, and being totally prepared for classes because he is struggling with that now...and he is only in 3rd Grade! He has forgotten his planner SO many times this year already that I had to make a plan with the teacher to make SURE he has it every day. He has had many many lunch detentions already because he would forget his planner and not have done his homework for that day, and I can't tell what he has for homework if I can't see it in his planner! Now the teacher has a website where I can go and check what he has every week for homework (she lists all assignments for that week) and as I said she makes sure he has his planner.

I so feel for you sweetie because "there for the grace of God and 3 more years, go I" as they say. For the organization part (remembering books and all assignments), maybe can he write things down that he will need every class of every day? I know that changing clsses is HARD to get used to and your son probably feels a lot out of control and lost and just scared because that is how I felt. It is actually so nice to be Aspie because I can relate to a lot of what our boys and your son is going through. I am more than willing to help anyone who needs advice on anything (even "silly" stuff that has nothing to do with anything lol) and I am honored that I have been accepted so well here. I feel at home, comfortable, and just love "listening" to all of you discuss the different issues that these bright but so misunderstood children have. I don't really know how he could h andle the changing of classes better. Is there a teacher he really trusts that he can ask for help or someone in any of his classes that he trusts? I know trust is a BIG issue sometimes, especially when you are feeling so little in such a big world. We have an outside agency to help our boys with issues like this, so we can be more prepared. I just IMed with my hubby (yes, he is downstairs and I am upstairs and we IM with each other lol) and told him what you'd written and he said the same thing as I am. I am afraid for our now-8 year old to go into middle school exactly for this reason...but I have a feeling that your son will be okay once he gets to his comfort-zone. I wish I could help more!

In a message dated 10/27/2010 10:48:01 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, kristenwallen@... writes:

Your post was an inspiration to me, hope that someday my son will live a happy life.I do have a question for you if you don't mind...What advice would you give for a brand new middle schooler to feel more comfortable. Middle school has turned our house upside down. The emotions, anger and frustration is constant. My son has an IEP and goes to resource for math and english but the changing classes, hallway craziness, keeping track of 7 classes etc. is causing him to shut down in class (do absolutely nothing work wise) then blowing up like a little pressure cooker once he gets home. I would love to hear from your perspective any ideas I could impliment to calm my son.Thank you!!! >> Aw heck...I am blushing here.> > I agree. That was very well-said!> > Heh...sometimes I don't even feel that well-adjusted lol! I guess that just > comes with the territory, though, and it is tolerable most days. It really > was a long road to where I am now and a LOT of hard work, changing some > behaviors and a lot of looking inside myself to say I may be a little > "different" from "normal" adults who are almost 40 (omg did I just admit that > again lol), but it is ME and I wouldn't want to be "normal" because those > adults seem so boring and stressed and too wrapped up in that "adult" life and > not able to be a child sometimes. I am happy with exactly who I am. > These kids can be successful and have friends (I even do, just not many) and > I KNOW that each and every one of these children are so precious and unique > and we actually have learned to embrace that in our boys. They may not be > rocket scientists (or even any type of scientist lol) but dang it...they > will be B. and J. and precious in their own ways.> > > In a message dated 10/26/2010 8:24:40 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, > lmoorhead4@... writes:>

[Guest guest]

That is a great idea. I hope we can do something like that next year when my son is in middle school. I have been wondering about that and worrying how he's going to handle everything.SuzanneSent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®From: "Lynne Banks" <lbanks8928@...>Sender: Date: Wed, 27 Oct 2010 14:06:17 -0500< >Reply Subject: Re: [sPAM] Re: ( ) Adult Aspies My dd's middle school implemented a new program called "check and connect". there is one teacher that is assigned children who need extra help, my dd being one of them. This teacher checks in with my dd daily (either at the beginning of her day or towards the end) and makes sure she has all info, books, planner etc..to successfully complete her day or the next day. its seems to be working very well.Lynne Bankswww.americanadoptioncongress.orgSouth Dakota State Representative www.adoptionscams.netAsk me how to protect yourself from being scammed in adoption! [sPAM] Re: ( ) Adult Aspies Whoooo that is a dilly of a pickle. Our oldest is in middle school too, but she has no issues developmentally and she is VERY mature and responsible for an 11 year old! That being said, we hadn't had any issues at all with her changing classes, etc. because she adjusted so well. Now, when our 8 year old gets to middle school, I am going to be in the same position you are! I KNOW that B. won't be able to handle the class changes, remembering books, and being totally prepared for classes because he is struggling with that now...and he is only in 3rd Grade! He has forgotten his planner SO many times this year already that I had to make a plan with the teacher to make SURE he has it every day. He has had many many lunch detentions already because he would forget his planner and not have done his homework for that day, and I can't tell what he has for homework if I can't see it in his planner! Now the teacher has a website where I can go and check what he has every week for homework (she lists all assignments for that week) and as I said she makes sure he has his planner. I so feel for you sweetie because "there for the grace of God and 3 more years, go I" as they say. For the organization part (remembering books and all assignments), maybe can he write things down that he will need every class of every day? I know that changing clsses is HARD to get used to and your son probably feels a lot out of control and lost and just scared because that is how I felt. It is actually so nice to be Aspie because I can relate to a lot of what our boys and your son is going through. I am more than willing to help anyone who needs advice on anything (even "silly" stuff that has nothing to do with anything lol) and I am honored that I have been accepted so well here. I feel at home, comfortable, and just love "listening" to all of you discuss the different issues that these bright but so misunderstood children have. I don't really know how he could h andle the changing of classes better. Is there a teacher he really trusts that he can ask for help or someone in any of his classes that he trusts? I know trust is a BIG issue sometimes, especially when you are feeling so little in such a big world. We have an outside agency to help our boys with issues like this, so we can be more prepared. I just IMed with my hubby (yes, he is downstairs and I am upstairs and we IM with each other lol) and told him what you'd written and he said the same thing as I am. I am afraid for our now-8 year old to go into middle school exactly for this reason...but I have a feeling that your son will be okay once he gets to his comfort-zone. I wish I could help more! In a message dated 10/27/2010 10:48:01 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, kristenwallen@... writes: Your post was an inspiration to me, hope that someday my son will live a happy life.I do have a question for you if you don't mind...What advice would you give for a brand new middle schooler to feel more comfortable. Middle school has turned our house upside down. The emotions, anger and frustration is constant. My son has an IEP and goes to resource for math and english but the changing classes, hallway craziness, keeping track of 7 classes etc. is causing him to shut down in class (do absolutely nothing work wise) then blowing up like a little pressure cooker once he gets home. I would love to hear from your perspective any ideas I could impliment to calm my son.Thank you!!! >> Aw heck...I am blushing here.> > I agree. That was very well-said!> > Heh...sometimes I don't even feel that well-adjusted lol! I guess that just > comes with the territory, though, and it is tolerable most days. It really > was a long road to where I am now and a LOT of hard work, changing some > behaviors and a lot of looking inside myself to say I may be a little > "different" from "normal" adults who are almost 40 (omg did I just admit that > again lol), but it is ME and I wouldn't want to be "normal" because those > adults seem so boring and stressed and too wrapped up in that "adult" life and > not able to be a child sometimes. I am happy with exactly who I am. > These kids can be successful and have friends (I even do, just not many) and > I KNOW that each and every one of these children are so precious and unique > and we actually have learned to embrace that in our boys. They may not be > rocket scientists (or even any type of scientist lol) but dang it...they > will be B. and J. and precious in their own ways.> > > In a message dated 10/26/2010 8:24:40 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, > lmoorhead4@... writes:>

[Guest guest]

I am counting on meeting with the middle school teachers, counselors etc. before school starts next year to have plans in place. I am hoping they will be as accommodating as your school. My bigger dilemma, the one that is keeping me up worrying at night is what to do with my son after school. I work, so in elementary, he has gone to latchkey after school till about 5. There's nothing like that in middle school. We live in a "walking" neighborhood even though it is at least a mile walk to the school property. I can see the walk being a huge problem for him, especially in the winter. We could drop him off in the morning, but he would be basically walking home alone, since he really doesn't have friends to walk with.

And I'm not comfortable with him coming home alone and being at home himself after school. Maybe some 11 year olds are mature enough to handle that, but mine isn't. I'm not sure what they expect us to do. I am thinking about changing my work hours, but I don't know how well that will go over. I am not in a good position to rock the boat, as I already work minimal hours and have to miss work for appointments, etc.

Does anyone think it's possible that they could make an accomodation to have an after school study hall? That would be a big load off of my mind.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Suzanne

suzmarkwood@...

From: Lynne Banks <lbanks8928@...>Subject: Re: [sPAM] Re: ( ) Adult Aspies Date: Thursday, October 28, 2010, 6:49 AM

 Suzanne, I worried so much over the summer about sending our dd off to middle school. We had one child go through this school already so I was aware of how middle school worked. So what I did was contacted the directors office of our school district and asked them what they had available for our dd. Then I set up a meeting with the middle school principle and counselor about two weeks before school started. Because of my call to the district office I found out about the "check and connect" program, so I also asked for that teacher to be in on our meeting. This meeting gave me the opportunity to introduce our dd and us to them and help them understand how they could best meet her needs. Then once we had her schedule, I wrote up one big email and sent it to all of her teachers. Oh and one of her classes is a social building class,,which she loves. She had a couple of little struggles starting out

but now she has done extremely well. We have never had a decent school year yet, this seems it is going to be the first one so far. I keep wondering if I can let my breath out yet,,sure you understand what I mean by that.

Lynne Bankswww.americanadoptioncongress.orgSouth Dakota State Representative

www.adoptionscams.netAsk me how to protect yourself from being scammed in adoption!

[sPAM] Re: ( ) Adult Aspies

Whoooo that is a dilly of a pickle. Our oldest is in middle school too, but she has no issues developmentally and she is VERY mature and responsible for an 11 year old! That being said, we hadn't had any issues at all with her changing classes, etc. because she adjusted so well. Now, when our 8 year old gets to middle school, I am going to be in the same position you are! I KNOW that B. won't be able to handle the class changes, remembering books, and being totally prepared for classes because he is struggling with that now...and he is only in 3rd Grade! He has forgotten his planner SO many times this year already that I had to make a plan with the teacher to make SURE he has it every day. He has had many many lunch detentions already because he would forget his planner and not have done his homework for that day, and I can't tell what he has for homework if I can't see it in his planner! Now the teacher has a website where I can go and check

what he has every week for homework (she lists all assignments for that week) and as I said she makes sure he has his planner.

I so feel for you sweetie because "there for the grace of God and 3 more years, go I" as they say. For the organization part (remembering books and all assignments), maybe can he write things down that he will need every class of every day? I know that changing clsses is HARD to get used to and your son probably feels a lot out of control and lost and just scared because that is how I felt. It is actually so nice to be Aspie because I can relate to a lot of what our boys and your son is going through. I am more than willing to help anyone who needs advice on anything (even "silly" stuff that has nothing to do with anything lol) and I am honored that I have been accepted so well here. I feel at home, comfortable, and just love "listening" to all of you discuss the different issues that these bright but so misunderstood children have. I don't really know how he could h andle the changing of classes better. Is there a teacher he really trusts that he

can ask for help or someone in any of his classes that he trusts? I know trust is a BIG issue sometimes, especially when you are feeling so little in such a big world. We have an outside agency to help our boys with issues like this, so we can be more prepared. I just IMed with my hubby (yes, he is downstairs and I am upstairs and we IM with each other lol) and told him what you'd written and he said the same thing as I am. I am afraid for our now-8 year old to go into middle school exactly for this reason...but I have a feeling that your son will be okay once he gets to his comfort-zone. I wish I could help more!

In a message dated 10/27/2010 10:48:01 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, kristenwallen@... writes:

Your post was an inspiration to me, hope that someday my son will live a happy life.I do have a question for you if you don't mind...What advice would you give for a brand new middle schooler to feel more comfortable. Middle school has turned our house upside down. The emotions, anger and frustration is constant. My son has an IEP and goes to resource for math and english but the changing classes, hallway craziness, keeping track of 7 classes etc. is causing him to shut down in class (do absolutely nothing work wise) then blowing up like a little pressure cooker once he gets home. I would love to hear from your perspective any ideas I could impliment to calm my son.Thank you!!! >> Aw heck...I am blushing here.> > I agree. That was very well-said!> > Heh...sometimes I don't even feel that well-adjusted lol! I guess that just > comes with the territory, though, and it is tolerable most days. It really > was a long road to where I am now and a LOT of hard work, changing some > behaviors and a lot of looking inside myself to say I may be a little > "different" from "normal" adults who are almost 40 (omg did I just admit that > again lol), but it is ME and I wouldn't want to be "normal" because those > adults seem so boring and stressed and too wrapped up in that "adult" life and > not able to be a child sometimes. I am happy with exactly who I am. > These kids can be successful and have friends (I even do, just

not many) and > I KNOW that each and every one of these children are so precious and unique > and we actually have learned to embrace that in our boys. They may not be > rocket scientists (or even any type of scientist lol) but dang it...they > will be B. and J. and precious in their own ways.> > > In a message dated 10/26/2010 8:24:40 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, > lmoorhead4@... writes:>

[Guest guest]

Suzanne,

Do you have a local YMCA that has an after-school program or a local Salvation

Army's Boys/Girls Club? We have both in our town and they both provide a bus

that picks up the kids going there from school and takes them to the

after-school program and keeps them there until 6 pm. They get a snack and

provide activities. There's a cost but it not terribly high and I believe that

scholarships are also available.

> >

> > Aw heck...I am blushing here.

> >

> > I agree. That was very well-said!

> >

> > Heh...sometimes I don't even feel that well-adjusted lol! I guess that just

> > comes with the territory, though, and it is tolerable most days. It really

> > was a long road to where I am now and a LOT of hard work, changing some

> > behaviors and a lot of looking inside myself to say I may be a little

> > " different " from " normal " adults who are almost 40 (omg did I just admit

that

> > again lol), but it is ME and I wouldn't want to be " normal " because those

> > adults seem so boring and stressed and too wrapped up in that " adult " life

and

> > not able to be a child sometimes. I am happy with exactly who I am.

> > These kids can be successful and have friends (I even do, just not many) and

> > I KNOW that each and every one of these children are so precious and unique

> > and we actually have learned to embrace that in our boys. They may not be

> > rocket scientists (or even any type of scientist lol) but dang it...they

> > will be B. and J. and precious in their own ways.

> >

> >

> > In a message dated 10/26/2010 8:24:40 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

> > lmoorhead4@ writes:

> >

>